A/N: Well...here you have it. The final chapter. The finale. Hope it doesn't disappoint. I can't thank you all enough...for sticking around for the long haul, reading, and reviewing. Totally means the world to me. Life presents us with ups and downs and sometimes those prevented me from updating in a consistent manner...but here I am...finishing at long last. Pass along your words of wisdom. I left this open for a possible sequel, but I noticed a challenge on another site that has piqued my interest...Ashley as a Robot, Spencer a human...they fall in love...hmmm. Not sure I'm worthy enough to pull it off though. I'm tossing some ideas around...so we'll see.
Disclaimer: FOR THE LAST TIME...i don't own it...unless you're speaking of the storyline. :)
3 months later…
"Well, it's been 180 days for me…and 90 since I last stood here in front of everyone proclaiming my sobriety. You know, I hate that word proclaiming, it sounds so forthright, and unbreakable…and let's be honest…unbreakable, is one thing I am definitely not," Ashley began.
It had a been a long 90 days since leaving Memories, and Ashley was determined to show both sides of the story to everyone sitting in front of her.
"Sobriety is a daily struggle, and while it's gotten easier, you have to be on your toes at all times. I perform in front of large crowds and small bars, but both places are littered with people ready to give you anything you want, and trust me when I tell you that I've found myself in the middle of an internal battle more than once," Ashley confessed.
Ashley looked across the faces of the people that appeared to be attentively listening to every word she said, and locked eyes with the one person that mattered the most to her. She allowed herself to get lost in blue for a minute, before winking, grinning, and continuing with her speech.
"I have been fortunate enough to have someone in my life that has been supportive, understanding, loving, and sometimes tough as nails, to help me every day since I left here. I have tested our love more times than one," Ashley confessed.
Flashback:
"That was an awesome show Ash!"
"Thanks Trevor. It feels good to be back out there performing."
"Well, just in case you want to unwind, I left you a little something in your dressing room."
Ashley felt her stomach turn and knot up as Trevor patted her on the back and walked away. She made her way through the hall and then her dressing room door. On the table, next to the wall, were a small mirror, a razor, and a tiny bag of white powder.
Ashley walked closer to the table, staring at the powder, before sitting down and pulling the baggie closer to her face for inspection.
Spencer walked through the door at that precise moment and was instantly stopped in her tracks at the sight before her.
Ashley turned slowly, meeting blue eyes, before staring at the baggie in her hand once again.
"Spencer, it's not…"
"Stop Ashley, I don't want to hear it. Go ahead and cut your lines. I mean, you've come so far, why not throw it all away?"
"This was left in my room, I just got in here and found it, Spencer, and you have to believe me when I tell you that I didn't ask for this."
"Do you want it?"
"Spence…"
"Do. You. Want it?"
Ashley looked between her lover and the powder in her hand. She could feel the ache deep in her belly as she recalled just how the high would feel after she would snort a few lines. Before she knew what was happening, tears were racing down her face, her hands were shaking, and she could barely breathe.
"Yes," she admitted, "My body wants this right now..."
She dropped the baggie and turned to Spencer, "but my heart wants you, Spencer. And I'm not stupid enough to believe you won't walk away from me because of that stupid little baggie. You are more important to me, and I've come too far…and…and…"Ashley choked up.
"Come here baby…it's okay. I understand," Spencer admitted, pulling the brunette close and stroking her soft curls.
"I love you."
"I love you too, baby."
End Flashback "But she has stood by me every step of the way, and I love her for everything she is, and everything she has helped me become," Ashley continued.
Spencer zoned out, but could feel the tears threatening to break loose. She was so proud of everything Ashley had accomplished over the past 6 months. Her tears were for her girlfriend's pain, her own pain, and they were for the love that has continued to grow between them over the months. She loved this broken beauty in front of her more than she had ever loved before. Ashley was her world, and as chaotic as it sometimes was, she wouldn't trade it for anything.
"So keep your heads up, your hearts open, and your eyes wide to the world you are about to re-enter. You will be seeing everything again for the first time and I encourage you to stop and breathe before you make any decisions this go around. I know I find myself breathing more now than I ever did…and it feels so good! Thank you!"
The people in attendance rose to their feet immediately and applauded Ashley as she moved around from behind the podium. Doctor Hamilton and a couple of nurses hugged her as she slowly made her way to the blonde that had taken up residence against a back wall.
"That was an inspiring speech, Miss Davies."
Ashley blushed, but reached forward and pulled Spencer toward her. Her hands fit so perfectly on the hips in front of her.
"Thank you. You know, I'm really glad you decided to come with me today."
Spencer grinned, biting her lower lip, "I told you I would be here."
"I know you did. I'm just happy you stuck to your word."
"Well, it would have been hard to back out since I live with you and all…not to mention that psycho sister of yours that hasn't left me alone about being here."
"Speaking of ol' psycho sis, where is Kyla?"
Spencer narrowed her eyes and pointed over to the opposite side of the room where Kyla was talking to a woman in a rather animated manner.
"Oh jeez," Ashley rolled her eyes, "…you know she's talking about decorating ideas she has for the facility, right?"
Spencer giggled, covering her mouth with her hand to muffle her laugh from getting any louder.
Ashley shook her head and grabbed Spencer's hand in her own before pulling her toward the door leading outside.
"Where are we going Ash? Shouldn't we go get Kyla?"
"She can wait; I just want to go for a little walk while we're here…if that's okay."
Spencer nodded in agreement, giving Ashley's hand a slight squeeze before pulling it to her mouth and placing a soft kiss on the palm of her girl's hand.
Ashley just grinned, pulling the blonde outdoors and into the sunlight.
After walking, in silence, for 15 minutes or so, the girls ended up out on the beach. Ashley sat down in the sand, pulling Spencer down next to her, and immediately wrapped herself around the blonde's body.
Brushing her fingers through chocolate curls, Spencer enjoyed the silence for a minute with her lover in her arms.
"How are you feeling about being here again?" Spencer questioned.
Ashley pulled back slightly and looked at Spencer before leaning forward slightly, capturing the blonde's lips between her own, kissing her with love. Reaching up and running her fingers across the girl's jaw, Ashley continued to plant loving kisses on her girl's lips.
Spencer sighed, resting her forehead against Ashley's as the brunette continued to run her fingers through blonde locks.
"I feel good. I mean, it's hard, knowing where I've been…but it's better knowing where I am now," Ashley paused, turning her head and looking out at the water, "…knowing I'm here with you."
Spencer smiled, parting from Ashley and leaning back on her hands.
"So what do you want to do this weekend? We could always re-paint the guest room, like you wanted…maybe have Kyla over to help, order some Chinese…"
"Marry me." Ashley interrupted.
Spencer froze, before turning to look at the girl next to her.
"Wait…what? I don't even think that was a question."
Ashley grinned, pulling a 3ct, princess cut, platinum diamond ring from her pocket and holding it out to Spencer.
"Okay then. We'll do it your way. Will you…Spencer Carlin…marry me?"
Spencer could feel the tears building immediately as she stared at the ring between Ashley's fingers.
"But…are you sure…I mean, we've only been together for…"
"…our entire lives, give or take a few years," Ashley finished.
"No…you know what I mean. We've only been living together for 3 months…and you don't even know all my bad habits yet…and…"
"Are you trying to talk me out of this, Spence?" Ashley laughed. "I mean, let's be real here…we've known each other since we were children…we spent some time apart…we grew up…and yet, here we are…back full-circle. I have no doubt about this…I want to marry you."
Spencer stared at Ashley, dumbstruck and surprised by her composure.
Ashley sat back on her heels, mock kneeling next to Spencer.
"So, I'm going to ask you again…Will you…"
"Yes...YES! Of course I will…as long as you're sure…"
"Stop it Spencer. I'm here aren't I? Asking you…"
Spencer grabbed Ashley, enveloping her in a strong hug, before planting hurried kisses on her neck and face…ending with her lips, where she ran her tongue across the brunette's lips and was granted immediate entry.
Pulling back and holding Spencer at arm's length, Ashley brought the ring up once again so Spencer could see it.
"Can I put this on you now?"
Spencer nodded her head, her right hand shaking as she ran it across her forehead, while extending the left one out to her NOW future wife.
Ashley slid the ring on her lover's hand and brought it to her lips, planting a gentle kiss on the ring-covered finger.
"I love you baby….and I cannot wait to spend my entire life loving you."
"I love you too Ash…more than you will ever know."