ME: Sorry, if it took a while. And ya'll were waiting. But, I had a school trip. We went to Austin and San Antonio. Wait, would this be revealing personal info? I hope not. But, guys, seriously, ya'll should check out the Riverwalk. Son bonita. ("It's beautiful", for those who are languagely challenged. I made up that word).

DISLAIMER: In no way at all, do I own Naruto. And neither do I own Botox. I do, however, own YOU! Jk. :D

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Actually…I look reealllyyyy HOT! My god! I should probably go to Tsunade, have her sign me up as a model, become famous, kick Hayden Panettiere's ass, and steal Milo Ventimeglia! He is so FREAKIN' HOT! No…actually, it's possible that won't work…

Are you joking me?

Ahhhhhh! Oh my god! Oh my god! There's a stalker…wait. Where are you?

I AM you. I know, I wish I wasn't.

Hey! Don't be comin' up here, into my mind, and be telling me things like this! Go…eat…worms! Yeah, foshizzle!

Oh my god. You are a freak. I am asking God to transport me to another body. I cannot take this anymore.

I really don't give a crap. Go eat God for all I care….God, please forgive me!

I am SO not talking to you anymore, you freak!

Whatever. I will mentally create a shunning-bubbly-thing and block you from my mind forever!

………

HELLO? Anybody home? Good. Ahhhh!

What now?

What's on my head? Are those ears?! Cat ears? AHHHH!

"Sakura? Are you okay?" asked Naruto's concerned voice, from outside.

"Yeah, I'm just fine. Great, in fact." I reply, sarcastically.

"Do you need any help?" asks Naruto, starting to open the door.

"NO! It's okay!" I shout.

Don't come in, please. I am naked in here! I have to grab some clothes! Put on a tank top and daddy shirt. Okay, old jeans! They are WAY too small. I have to call Ino and borrow some of her clothes.

Ino,

Can you bring over some clothes? Like, now? Don't ask questions. Just come immediately. Bring a whole bag of clothes.

-

"Hey, Ino." I say, glumly.

"Ahhhhhhh!!!!!" Ino screams. "What the hell happened to Sakura? Did you eat her, you slutty bitch? And why do you look like Sakura? What's with your hair, and your nails, and your face? And why are you sitting there in a towel, wet? Do you think you look hot or something? You…..actually, you do look hot…" She says, trailing off.

"Pig, what is your problem? My boobs are bigger, so my bras don't fit, and my butt no longer fits in my underwear." I say. Waaaaa!

"Ohhhhh. So that's why you called me to bring you clothes."

"Yeah."

In the end, we managed to fit me in one of her shorts and two tank tops and a long shirt on top. That way, they would support my bazookas.

Bazookas? Anyway, what are you wearing down there if you have no underwear? Please tell me that you aren't borrowing some of Ino's.

No, actually, my area 51 is uncovered. It's quite breezy up here.

"Sakura?" Ino says, waving her hand in front of my face.

We walk into the mall, awkwardly. Because, now I am taller than Ino. I am now 5'9". I know. I am REALLY tall. We get to Victoria's Secret and we walk inside, looking for lingerie. When I walk inside, guess who I see?

The Jerk, himself. I will sabotage his life, and he will never see it coming. Oooohhh. Look who's with him. Karin. The bitch. She doesn't deserve a boyfriend. Actually, scratch that. They're perfect for each other. Whoa. Are they buying lingerie? That's so…weird. Whoa. Is she trying it on in front of him? Modeling it for him? Ew. She is such a slut.

"Look, Ino. Isn't Karin such a slut?" I ask, pointing towards them.

"Ahhhh! Sasuke! He's SO hot!" Ino squeals.

My God. My best friend is a FANGIRL. Ugh.

Yes. With this, I totally agree. But, that guy is HOT. I don't blame her. Go ask him out. He'll definitely accept. With my hotness, everyone falls in love with me.

Ahem. Excuse me? You are a spirit. It is ME who is hot. So, what the hell are you talking about? Anyhow, he won't even remember me, 'cause of my change in appearance.

That's a good thing. Now, walk over there and talk to him. Repeat everything I say.

Oh, sure! Not! As if I'd listen to my freaky conscience.

WHAT?! That's it, you freak. I will have God punish you for your insolence.

Oh, just shut up.

"Hello? Sakura? You think he's hot too, right?" Ino asks.

"Ugh. Blech. Ew. No." I say, crinkling my nose.

"Seriously? That dude is HHHHOOOTTTTT!" Ino squeals, again, jumping up and down.

Sometimes, I feel ashamed of my best friend.

Yeah, whatever. I'm taking a shower. So, shut up. You're making me feel awkward.

gape

"Ahem. Sakura? Why are you gaping?" Ino asks. "Now hurry up! Get some underwear!"

"Um, Ino? I think you're mistaken. I'm buying lingerie, not underwear." I state, matter-of-factly.

"Hey, honey. Do you want me to help you try some on?" asks a familiar, grinning voice.

Son of a bitch. I can feel him grinning, and smirking, and…just being a son of a bitch!

"No thanks. I'm good." I say, faking a smile, and pushing past.

"We haven't met yet, have we? I'm Sasuke, Uchiha Sasuke." He says, grinning, showing his glinting teeth.

Quick. Say something clever. Say, "Oooh. I always wanted a James Bond man." Yeah, say that.

"Back off, freak." I say.

Noooo! Why didn't you listen to me?

Sasuke's POV

Wait. Did that girl just call me a son of a bitch? She is hot. But, I prefer slutty, sexy girls. Not weird, sexy girls. But, damn! She is so sexy! How could that not have worked?

End of Sasuke's POV

Hah! Did you see his face?

I did. And now, I have died. He looked at me…you, like a…a…WORM! We're worms! Nooo.

Whoa. Just chill.

"Anyway. Dude, we have met before. It's me Sakura." I say, grinning back. Well, actually, more like a smirk, than a grin.

Sasuke's POV

Wait. What?

End of Sasuke's POV

Hahaha. Did you see his face? Priceless.

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NOTE: Hey, Pretzel. What's up? Send me a message, and I'll reply folks! R&R!!! Oh, I want to show ya'll something. It's awesome. I saw it on someone's profile, and if you don't have it, you should add it.

COOL THING:

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(n.n)

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Awesome, right? I've named mine, Qwerty!