Obsession had always been a driving force behind Zuko. Obsession to become better at fire bending, to please his father, to catch the Avatar; anything. He always had something else obsess over.
And when the Avatar, Aang, had become his friend, he had thought that maybe he could start over. Start a new life. One without being apart of the fire nation. One without constantly being angry. Just a nice, normal life being Zuko. Helping Aang master fire bending.
But obsession still ruled over him. And it still involved Aang.
He was obsessed with Aang being able to fire bend perfectly. Maybe it was because obsession was just apart of him. Maybe he wanted to prove something. It could have been that teaching Aang to fire bend would help defeat his father and then he would have had some part in it.
They all seemed reasonable but Zuko was sure that none of those reasons was the real answer as to why he was so desperate. Maybe his need to train with Aang wasn't really the result of wanting to perfect his fire bending. Maybe…
"Hey there, Hotman!"
"Stop calling me that! I told you to stop!"
"You told me to stop calling you Sifu Hotman, not Hotman."
Zuko sighed, rubbing his eyes before sending a glare to the young air bender. "Don't call me Hotman. At all. Zuko. Call me Zuko. Understand?"
Aang shook his head. "What's wrong with Hotman?"
"Hot. Man."
"What?"
"…You're calling me hot man."
"Well, yeah. I am. I thought that was obvious," Aang replied, one eyebrow quirked up and Zuko felt like bashing his head against the wall of his room. The entire thing was awkward.
"Okay, Hotman is a really old phrase, Avatar."
"Aang."
"Fine. Aang. Anyway. It's really old. Yeah, it was common 100 years ago-"
"I'm 113 years old."
"I know!" The fire prince yelled, feeling frustrated. He tied to relax and begin again. "Okay, it's an old phrase. Nobody uses it anymore. Like when Uncle was younger, everybody called each other Flamers."
"…Flamers?" Aang repeated. He frowned and then looked confused. "Why would anybody call somebody that?"
"Why would anybody call somebody Hotman? Think about what you're calling me. Hotman. Hot. Man. A hot man."
For a second, Zuko hadn't been sure Aang would understand what he was getting at until realization finally dawned on his face. Except to his surprise, Aang didn't say anything but seemed to delve into deep thought. What he could have been thinking about over something as simple as innocently calling a man hot, Zuko had no idea. But a frown was apparent on the air bender's face and for a few seconds, Zuko just watched. Waiting.
"Aang? What are you thinking about?"
His head popped up and he looked at Zuko with a little bit of confusion before a goofy grin replaced the frown.
"Nothing, Zuko!" He didn't call him Hotman and some look passed through his eyes before quickly disappearing as if it had never been there. "How about we start fire bending lessons, okay?"
And all Zuko could do was nod and wonder if something had changed between them accidentally.
----
"Now, I guess this is where fire bending starts to get a little dangerous."
Aang gulped nervously. "Um, how dangerous are we talking?"
"Dodging fireballs?"
Aang didn't need to say any words for Zuko to able to tell just how Aang was feeling. Completely petrified.
"I can dodge earth and water attacks alright!" Aang argued, his face still one of complete dread. Dodging fire was a lot different from dodging earth or water in terms of damage. "So, don't we know I can evade just fine? I was always able to miss your attacks!"
Zuko coughed in an embarrassed way. "Um, I'm not actually as fast as my father is. And when I used to attack you, I still wasn't very good. So, well, that doesn't matter."
"Oh."
There was a little bit of awkward silence that swarmed around them until Zuko coughed again. He could admit to himself now that maybe he'd never be as good as his father or sister. But he could teach the Avatar fire bending. That was all that mattered. Not his own skills. Not anymore.
"Okay, so. You've seen how quick my sister is, right? How are you at dodging her?"
"I'mable to dodge her. But there have been a few close calls."
The fire bender nodded and then got into his fire bending stance when he walked back a few paces.
"Okay, I'll warn you the first few times when I'm about to strike at you. But after that, you have to figure out when I'm going to do it."
"Okay." There was still some trepidation in his voice but the avatar seemed to have understood that this was a lesson that needed to be done.
But looking at Aang and at what positions they were, Zuko was brought back to memory lane. He'd been in this situation so many times. About to attack him. And this time? This time he was his teacher. This time, they were friends. A light, fluttery feeling arose in him and he smiled.
"Zuko, are you going to attack?"
"Huh?" Zuko asked, as if being brought out a daze before shaking his head and then nodding. "Sorry, yeah. Okay, I'm about to attack. Get ready."
Aang's response was to look more serious. And it amazed Zuko sometimes how serious he could be. He knew Aang had to be thirteen now. In some ways, they shared a lot in common. Both going through something they were too young to have to go through. He'd been thirteen when he'd been burned and banished from his own home. Aang was thirteen and having to save the world. But Aang never seemed to complain. He never seemed to really be in denial. When they would practice fire bending, Aang always became serious. As if knowing what needed to be done. It was admirable and Zuko wished he could have had that maturity at thirteen. Instead, he'd been a total moron.
"Uh, Zuko? You're spacing out again."
"Sorry," Zuko apologized, feeling frustrated with himself. It wasn't time to go thinking about stuff like that. He had a job to do and that was to make Aang better at fire bending. At working with fire.
"Okay, attacking….now!"
At the word now, he directed a fireball at Aang, who easily dodged it.
"Good work, Aang!" Zuko complimented, feeling himself smile. He was doing that more and more now. "Now I'm going to be going faster after I warn you, okay?"
Aang nodded in reply.
"Attacking…now!" He threw a fireball at Aang even more rapidly than he had before and Aang was able to avoid it still. He had always been great at dodging. "Good!"
Aang grinned.
"Okay, this is the last time I'll be warning you about attacking so…now!"
Unfortunately, Aang hadn't been expecting that and although he had dodged it well enough, his shoulder hadn't avoided it completely. It had been burned a little and Aang dropped to his knees, hissing in pain.
Zuko quickly ran to his side and looked at the burn. His fingers softly touching around it.
"I'm sorry…" He murmured as he checked the burn out.
The air bender gave him a lopsided smile. "It isn't like you did it on purpose. I'll just go have Katara heal it for me. We'll finish later, right?"
Zuko looked up at the younger boy in shock. "You still want to train?"
"Yeah! I like fire bending now and you're a great teacher. Besides, it's fun. It's always great to learn from a good friend." Aang gave him one more smile as he stood up and made ready to leave. "I'll be back so stay here!"
Zuko nodded dumbly, watching him walk away, his heart beating fast. Friends. Aang had called him a friend. It made him feel like he had defeated some monster. Had climbed some dangerous mountain. It made him feel fluttery inside again. Like when Mai would always smile at him and lean in to kiss him.
He frowned. That wasn't exactly a good thing. He knew he wasn't the smartest person around but having the same fluttery feeling you had for your girlfriend and then having it with some guy? The Avatar? No, that was bad. Really, really bad.
And why would he even have that same fluttery feeling? Mai was a girl and she was pretty and always believed in him. Aang wasn't pretty. He was a goofy looking boy. But Aang had that ability to make you feel better, just like Mai had always been able to. And Aang always smiled at him more than Mai had. Aang had accepted him.
He let out a scream of frustration and flopped down so he was looking up at the sky.
"Why is this messed up stuff always happening to me?! First Mom is banished, and then my father becomes the stupid Fire Lord! Then I'm banished! Then I'm a freak of nature! Then I become obsessed over a twelve-year-old boy! Then I become an outlaw at my own country! Then…then!" He screamed again. It seemed no matter what, the universe was always throwing things at him. "Now I have a crush on the Avatar! Why?!"
"Um…"
Zuko sat up quickly and saw Sokka standing there, looking a little stunned.
"Wait, um! You didn't hear that just-"
Sokka interrupted him by putting his hands up. "I'm not getting involved. Nope. You can just handle this on your own. Nope. I'm just going to go back and talk to everybody about something simple like the weather."
And with that, he walked away.
----
"Hey, Katara?"
The girl looked up at him with a smile but then gasped, running over to him.
"You're burned! I knew something like this would happen! I just knew it…" She murmured and looked at the burn. "I can heal this in about five minutes, I think. Come on, let's go."
Aang wasn't exactly sure why they had to go somewhere else but if Katara wanted them to go somewhere else, then they'd go somewhere else. She brought him to one of the rooms and sat him down, bringing out her water.
"Aang, you shouldn't practice with Zuko anymore. We'll find you another fire bender. Zuko…he's not really any different. He hurt you."
It was odd. The healing felt so nice and relaxing yet her words made him feel the exact opposite.
"But he didn't do it on purpose, Katara. It was an accident. Zuko's changed. He's different. I don't think he was ever bad. Just…misunderstood?"
"Misunderstood? Never really bad? How many times did you almost die because of him? How many times did the rest of us almost die?" Her voice was turning colder and Aang couldn't understand it. He couldn't understand why she just couldn't try to move over that fact. Things were different now. They were all different. "Aang, your heart's so big. You always try to bring out the best in people but there's no good to be brought out in him. He'll never change."
He could feel anger slowly filling him. Katara had never angered him like this before. Katara had always been the one who could make him smile no matter what. But now? Now with the way she was talking about Zuko. Like he was some monster? It infuriated him. Zuko was trying so hard to make sure he learned fire bending. He was trying to make up for his past. He was a good person. Aang knew that. He had seen it.
He tugged Katara's hands off him and he turned around, pinning her with a glare.
"Aang…"
"Never change? Open your eyes, Katara, he has! He's different! He didn't hurt me on purpose! It's fire! How am I not supposed to be burned once? Why can't you just give him a chance?!"
"Aang…"
"What's wrong with you?!" Aang asked, loudly. Yelling more than just talking.
"You don't know how it felt when I thought you were going to die! You can't imagine what I was thinking! I thought I was losing somebody again! I lost my mom, my dad…and then when I saw you falling!" She was crying, tears falling down her cheeks. She looked up at him, her sapphire eyes full of sorrow. "Aang, if he hadn't turned against us. Against his own uncle, maybe you wouldn't have almost died."
All he could do was hug her to him. And somehow, it was different. Just like everything else. Touching her used to make him feel different. More alive. Now it was like touching anybody else. It was scary and depressing. And when she pulled away, he could only give her a sad look back.
"Things are different now, huh?"
She nodded, looking away. "And I think you mean that in more ways than one." She looked at him again. "Do you hate me now?"
"I can't hate you for caring about me," the air bender replied, trying to give her a smile although it was strained. "I don't think I could ever hate you."
"But…things are different now?" Katara asked again and Aang nodded, not feeling he was able to say it again. "I still really care about you, Aang. You know that, right?"
"And I do too. It's just…"
"Things are different," she finished for him, giving him a smile. She wiped away her tears. "Come on, let's finish this healing."
Aang finally understood things better now.
----
When they finished the healing, Aang returned to where everybody was hanging out and he looked to Sokka, who quickly looked away.
"I told him and I'm telling you again! Not. Getting. Involved."
----
As Zuko stared up at the sky, he wondered if life would ever stop being complicated. Falling for somebody like Aang was nowhere near easy. Especially when he knew how odd it was. And especially how hopeless it was to even expect any kind of return.
Lessons would be weirder now. How would it be to touch him? How would he handle it? And when Aang smiled at him, how would he stop himself from being an idiot? From wanting to kiss him?
Now he knew why Aang calling him Hotman had always bothered him. Why he had been so excited to train with him. It had never been about proving anything. It had just been about being with the air bender. That's all he'd wanted.
"Stupid!" Zuko said to himself as he stared up. "Stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid…"
"What's stupid?"
Zuko sat up quickly, seeing Aang walking to him. He couldn't say anything and when Aang finally sat down next to him, he looked away.
"So, what's stupid?"
"Nothing…"
Things were silent and Zuko unreasonably wondered if maybe Aang knew. Maybe Aang somehow knew about what he was feeling. It was completely paranoid thinking and completely impossible…but…
"Katara was my first love."
The fire bender hadn't expected anything like that to come from the boy and he looked to him a little confusedly.
"What?"
Aang had been looking ahead and then he looked to Zuko.
"Katara was my first love. All I could was daydream about her. Think about how pretty she was. How wonderful she was. I'd think about starting a family with her. I'd think about all this kind of stuff. I'd try so hard to impress her…"
"Um…" Zuko had no idea where this was going but he knew it made him feel awkward.
"But, things change, huh?" Aang looked forward again and Zuko just wished he could say something. "Even if you don't really want them to, they change. You can't control it. Like a lot of things. You just can't control what happens all the time."
Aang had never acted like this before. Or at least Zuko had never seen him act so deep and philosophical. It was nerve-wracking.
"Sokka told me you touch me a lot." And then Zuko felt his heart stop. He knew. Aang knew. "And that I allow it. And I didn't really get what he meant. You're my teacher, what's the big deal, right? But I was just talking to Katara and I realized things really have changed. She used to touch me and I always allowed it."
The fire bender had no idea what to do or to say. He wasn't even sure what Aang was getting at. And when Aang looked at him, completely serious, Zuko felt his heart beat just once. A loud beat that he was sure everybody could hear.
"Zuko, I don't think I'm in love with you but I think I'm--no,we're--getting there."
"I--!"
But Zuko was silenced by Aang leaning forward to kiss him. His heart began beating rapidly and it took him a few seconds to realize he should be kissing back. That this was like a gift.
He kissed back.
And when Aang pulled away, he had a ridiculous grin plastered on his face.
"You told me fire bending needs passion, right? Well, now we've got some, my good Hotman!"
The End.
Notes: This is either really good or completely weird. I'm going for completely weird. This didn't turn out how I expected it to. But there you go! People wanted me to add on and I did. IT'S OVER. You want a sex scene, you're barking up the wrong tree.