Author's Notes: Written at 3 AM in the morning because, as far as I know, that's the best time for wannabe writers like me to write. Why? Because at 3 AM in the morning, when you're sleep-deprived and craving for bizarre food choices like almond jello and pistachio ice-cream, anything and everything makes total and wonderful sense.

Which is why you all should forgive the silliness which I have written here. Bipolar!LeonCrackhappy!Sora all the way! Normally, I'm a die-hard RikuSora fan, but this just bit me square in the butt and refused to let go. Don't like LeonSora? Then shoo and run along now. For the others...

Hope you enjoy?

Disclaimer: I do not own Kingdom Hearts.

Fantabulous

When Leon first met Sora, he was utterly convinced that the boy was a total and complete nightmare in the making.

Granted, Leon knew that it probably wasn't a very nice thing to assume, considering he'd only sat next to the boy for a good thirty minutes or so—yet he found that his assessment and hypothesis of the target at hand was only growing more and accurate as time seemed to whittle by in painfully slow and disbelief-stricken seconds.

"And I would also like a helping of the shrimp tempura and fried pork, along with a bowl of miso soup and a plate of lettuce wraps—and would you look-at-that, you guys have sushi too? God, I love this airline service—give me a dozen of these smack-a-roos too—!"

Was it even humanly possible for such a monster appetite to exist?

Leon once again peered, with much incredulity, at the babble-fest of a teen that resided in the airplane seat next to him. Tie-dyed sneakers, messy brown spikes that, amusedly enough, resembled an indignant porcupine poised in attack-mode, and a "Go-Go PowAH Rangers!" hoodie tarnished in godforsaken eye-bleeding-ful colors; seriously, what was an uncoordinated kid like him doing on a first class plane ride to Japan?

There was a shriek. "Of all that is holy and full of sugar, there's chocolate gelato here too!"

More importantly, why the hell did he have to sit next to him?

The flight attendant looked down at the hyperventilating boy with sweet fondness. "Would you like anything to drink with all of that, dear?"

Said tousle-haired teenager with a black hole for a stomach chewed on his lower lip in a manner of deep and highly concentrated thought. "Do you have orange juice?"

"Of course!"

"Fantabulous. I'll have that then!"

Fantabulous? That wasn't even a real word.

Please tell me the kid didn't actually say that.

Leon, at this particular moment in time, just really, really wanted to shove a nice pair of miniature sized torpedoes down the auditory tunnel of his very sensitive and much annoyed ear hole. Perhaps then might he be spared the incessant, ongoing prattle ridden with make-believe vocabulary that continuously stabbed at his tympanic membrane in tiny pinpricks of "For the love of tuna, please shut uppppppp."

The boy turned his head towards him.

Oh, god, no.

Leon shifted uneasily and angled his body so that he faced away, wonderfully away, from the hyperactive bundle of cheer to his right.

Get the message. My back is away from you, get the message, get the message, please get the—

"Hello, good sir!"

The world hated him.

He closed his grey eyes for the briefest second, resisted the urge to growl, and steeled himself for the impending doom that had taken upon the form of a small and very persistent brunet seated right next to him.

Leon, with much energy and mental will - and still refusing to fully face the kid -, mustered a neutral look. "Can I help you?"

He was rewarded with a dazzling thing of a grin that threatened to burn his eyeballs all the way back to the far, itsy-bitsy corners of the universe where the ex-planet Pluto currently resided in lonely solitude. God, it almost actually hurt to look at him. Kinda like in that Lord of the Rings' scene when Gandalf the Grey had become Gandalf the All-Sparkly-Bleach-White. Aragorn, Legolas, and Gimli had certainly been pleasantly eye-skewered by that unhealthy dosage of unexpected -and rather unnecessary- abuse of light.

Talk about UV radiation reflecting off from shining tooth to shining tooth.

Right. Anyway, back to the situation at hand.

"I don't believe that I've introduced myself!"

Please don't.

"First thing's first! My name is Sora—"

Wasn't that supposed to be a girl's name?

"This is my first time on a plane actually—"

No, really. I couldn't tell.

"I'm just so excited, I feel like my brain is gonna squish itself into a little, tiny ball and explode or something—!"

It's just a freakin' airplane ride, kid. Learn to breathe.

"And I don't believe that I've caught your name!" Sora glanced at him, all wide-eyed and eager with the biggest goddamn smile that he had ever laid his eyes on in his entire twenty-two years of – and he was proud to say this - normal life. "I am pleased to meet your acquaintance, Mrrrrrr.—?"

Leon grunted.

The brunet placed a hand to his ear as if suffering from some unknown ear affliction. "Sorry! Didn't seem to catch that!"

The kid really didn't take the hint.

Leon scowled, swerved around to directly face his sitting companion and was dead-set, point-on-blank determined to have the kid, the boy, Sora, thrown off the airplane with his very own pinkie if he had to because he honestly just wanted to shut his eyes and sleep for the whole entire trip but no, he couldn't do that, not if his life depended on it, because this kid just wouldn't stop talking, chattering, and smiling like some ad-show on super drive mode with the damnedest, largest, and biggest—"

And that was the exact and precise moment when Squall Leonhart took his first nice, long, and proper look at Sora.

…biggest and - damn well pretty - baby blue eyes he had ever laid his eyes on in his entire twenty-two years of –starting from now on and he was a bit frightened to say this- abnormal life.

Leon's mind suddenly and most violently, at the most crucial moment of course, decided to shut down. In the later times to come, he could've sworn he'd almost heard the wheels in his head grinding to a stagnant and horrifyingly embarrassing shriek of 'holy f-?'.

And while he proceeded to stare like some mindless, open-mouthed idiot, Sora's expression of undulated cheeriness slowly started to morph into a strain of slight concern.

Baby Blue-Eyes waved a hand in front of his face. "Hey, Mister, are you alright? Oh my, you've got this really weird, zombie-like look in your eyes—oh my god, is there something on my face or anything?" Sora soldered his hands together to his cheeks as if they were made of good ol' play-dough. "Or maybe something in my teeth—you know, I once had this ugly strip of broccoli stuck between here and here, and people kept starin' and giving me weird looks and I was all like, Say what! Honestly, imagine that, a big, fat glob of whatever on your front tooth for the whole world to see—!"

Leon snapped out of his mind-induced fantasy.

He also chose, in that moment, to let out a very graceless and awkward, "Name's Leon," shoving his hand forward in a brusque, jerky motion that was supposed to resemble something like a gesture of friendliness, but somehow only managed to exude a sense of menace, because somehow, everything he did always seemed to be so scary, and never mind the fact the question was only asked about 5 minutes ago and that he was interrupting Sora's conversation and probably looked like some delayed-reaction-ed, impossibly rude sort of jerk

but then Sora's eyes lit up like a carnival all done up in fluorescents and electric stuff—all blue and shimmering and sugary-sweet, and without a second to spare, shook his hand as if it were the most natural thing to do.

"…and here I was thinking that all you ever did was mumble and grunt. Nice to meet you too, Mr. Leon."

He must look like a real idiot now.

"Soo, what calls you to the wonderful shores of the Rising Sun and fried dumplings galore?"

"Er."

"That's nice! I'm here visiting my best friend Riku; he's here on some sort of exchange program, something about 'broadening his horizons and conquering the world one country at a time', I mean honestly, he's only a year older than me—nineteen years old—"

Aha.

"So you're eighteen years old, hm?"

Just barely legal.

A giggle. "Well, aren't you the smart one, Mr. Leon?"

Was the kid flirting with him?

"Funny, I could've sworn you weren't a day older than fourteen."

Oh god, was he actually flirting back?

There was an indignant gasp followed by the most adorable pout that ever existed in the entire effin' universe. Someone just go yank out his cavity-infested teeth one 'destroyed-by-cotton candy-cuteness' molar at a time. "Hey! Well, if you're so great…how old are you?"

"Guess."

Well, he was definitely teasing him...

"Hmmm, I'd say about, fortyyy—"

"Do you want to die, brat?"

Another giggle. Wow, was it possible for someone to be so giddy? How abnormal. "I'm just kidding. Alright, twenty-four, twenty-five, the oldest…!"

"Twenty-two."

"Cha-chiiiing! Sora hits the jackpot!"

"You were off by about 3 digits."

Oh, he was definitely flirting back.

"Bah, I was close enough."

"So, you'll be staying with your friend, Riku, I'm assuming?"

"Naww, I'm gonna be landing my bum in some hotel—"

"Which hotel?"

Whoah there, Leon. Dangerous waters over here.

The smaller brunet scratched his head. "The Four Seasons, I think?"

Good lord, was this some type of sick and twisted joke?

"Hmrh. Same with me."

A long and drawn out gasp. "Oh. Em. GEE. Like, no way!" Sora bounced up and down, cinnamon-burned locks of hair scintillating about in a disturbing way of manner that made them look – wrongwrongwrongwrong - so soft. "Wow, this is like, destiny or fate or something—in fact, this is just great, what if we're just a door or two away from each other? We can go out and eat lunch, I can introduce you to my friend Riku, and, get this, we can even sleepover in each other's rooooms—!"

Unhealthy thoughts! His conscience screamed at him. I forbid thee to instill a deeper underlying meaning to that statement!

Leon drew in the teenager's mildly tanned skin

– like the foam of some caramel dolce latte -

moist and very full lips

– if only there was a way to shut him up -

and entirely too blue

– he could've sworn he saw something mischievous twinkle across those -

ultramarine eyes.

Deeper underlying meaning my ass. This kid over here couldn't possibly be that innocent.

Sora beamed, his odylic force all saturated and drenched in that virgin-school-boy-role type of crap which he only saw in movies and unrealistically-written internet novels.

"Mr. Leon, I think this will be a start of a fantabulous relationship."

The End

A/N: …I'm sorry.