Results of Self Destruction

Summary: The choices they have made will lead each one of them towards an unwinding path of self destruction. This is no fairy tale. There are no happy endings. Don't say I never warned you. C/B/N/S/D

Rating: T for language and mature content.

Disclaimer: I don't own Gossip Girl. Go figure.

Author's Warning: This story jumps around all over the place, if it's too confusing, stop reading. I write in random impulse. I am also very bad at updating. Don't hate.

Chapter 2

Blair Waldorf married Nate Archibald 28 days after Chuck Bass had broken her heart for the last and final time. She remembers this hauntingly. After the hell that he caused her junior year of high school, the cotillion, his sex blogs, Tuscany, Blair Waldorf took him back for what she promised was the last time.

June 2nd 2008

"Blair, I'm sorry."

"Sorry?" Blair sobbed, "You ask me to go to Tuscany with you and you run away and screw the first whore you see and you're sorry? You're not sorry. You're Chuck Bass."

"I'm trying here."

"I understand it's hard for you. I do. But how much hurt and betrayal do I actually have to indure before it's all worth it?"

"It will never happen again Blair, I promise." He pulled her close and kissed her before she could refuse.

She kissed him back, patronizing everything she had just yelled.

"This is the last time, Chuck," She looked at him firmly, "If you ever cheat on my again, mess it up, so help me God, I will walk away from you. And I swear, I swear I will cause you more pain than you will cause me."

Chuck nodded quietly, forehead pressed against hers. Her words sunk in bitterly. He believed every word. If there was one person more vengeful than himself, it was Blair Waldorf.

May 31st 2009

The night of graduation, the entire senior class of Constance and St. Jude's stayed up all night in Chuck's Bass's suite. The only brunette missing in action was too busy packing for an early flight to France. In the last few days of their high school careers, the devious couple of Chuck Bass and Blair Waldorf had a minor fallout that Gossip Girl didn't even bother to grace her horrid homepage. They were Chuck and Blair. They fought and made up. The Upper East Siders have grown to expect it.

The latest lover's quarrel, however, was about their summer plans. Chuck had wanted to spend their last summer together in New York where he would start right away with a job from his father. Blair wanted to spend the summer together in Europe, visit her father and bask the most romantic places in the world. She wanted to make up for the previous promised summer. The fight was minor. Deep down they both knew if they held up long enough, the other would cave and be on the first flight across the pond before summer's end.

When Blair gave into her urges, she left her bags and took the first cab to his suite in the early hours of the morning. She came to find her classmates passed out in every possible space, kicking half emptied bottles and bodies out of her way she approached his room. Having the three day long abstinence she declared on their fight take its toll on her, Blair anticipated making a certain Chuck Bass a very, very happy man. What she stumbled upon, however, was the worst sight she had seen in her very young life. Sprawled on top of her boyfriend was a certain familiar blonde Blair knew too well. Their naked bodies disheveled upon thread counts of satin sheets. She threw the nearest bottle of liquor against the mirror and wiped away her tears before running away.

58 missed calls later, 57 voicemails, 2 unforgiveable apologies and 1 very long flight later Blair Waldorf threw her phone into a lake near her home in France. She vowed to keep to her promise and break Chuck Bass to the bits and pieces that she became.

June 12th 2009

"Blair Bear, the maid found this in your bathroom, is it true?" Her dad asked cautiously, careful to not upset the fragile brunette.

"Yes." She simply replied, pushing the contents on her plate around aimlessly with a silver fork.

"Is it Chuck's?" He asked, holding tightly onto her small hand.

She looked up at him with tearful eyes, begging, pleading for him to not mention the dreaded name.

"Blair, I know you've been kind of seeing Nate again, but if this pregnancy test is accurate and it's-"

"Nate proposed." Blair interrupted, she composed herself, "I said yes."

"Blair, what are you-?"

"You don't have to worry," She looked at her father firmly, "I know what I'm doing."

Harold always knew when Blair Waldorf was in control, no one can say otherwise.

June 27th 2009

"Your father came to see me yesterday."

"Did he?" Blair asked, uninterested.

"He tried to talk me out of it," Nate said, "Said you were just on the rebound. I was making a mistake."

"I'm not surprised he would say such things." Blair replied.

"He also said something else," Nate began, "He said you were pregnant."

Blair's blank expression nearly broke.

"Is it true?"

No answer.

"Blair, you know I have never gotten over you. I know everyone thinks I'm an idiot for waiting for you after all this time but I need to know, Blair. Are you or are you not having Chuck's baby?" Nate pleaded, "Please, you owe me that much."

"I'm sorry." Blair replied quietly, barely audible. Her tears welled up in her doe eyes.

"Jesus Christ." Nate sighed, He rubbed his forehead with a sigh.

After a lifetime of silence he spoke up.

"Let's get married tomorrow. It will be small, but it will have to do."

"Nate…"

"I want to prove to you that I am the one for you. If losing you to Chuck is what it takes for me to realize that, then so be it. But I will not lose you again."

Nate knelt down beside Blair and wiped away the overflowing tears, pulling her into a tight embrace.

"You're mine, Blair Waldorf. Always and forever."

And she cried. Not because her childhood dreams had finally came true or that her plan was falling into place but because the past 28 painful days of excruciating vengeance for a certain Upper East Side devil was also a exhausting 28 days of slight hope 

bursting into flames. No longer could she secretly hope for a miracle to happen. For a certain cheating bastard to fly across the Atlantic and fight for her. No more. Her dreams were dead. She would have to learn to live without him, without life, itself.

August 1st 2009

After weeks of rumors and gossip circulating their unexpected wedding, Nate Archibald and Blair Waldorf returned to the place of cherished memories and haunting mistakes.

She heart leapt when she heard his voice echoing through her empty house.

"Mr. Bass, Miss Blair is not here." Dorota shouted aggressively.

"Please, just let me see her." He sounded desperate, broken.

Sitting on the top of the stairs, she wondered if he was broken nearly as much as her.

"Mr. Bass, you need to leave." Dorota ordered.

"Blair! I know you can hear me!"

"Chuck." Nate hissed, "What the hell are you doing here man?"

"I need to see Blair." He responded, determined.

"She doesn't want to see you." Nate replied, shoving Chuck towards the elevators.

"She's made a mistake. She's just doing this to hurt me." Chuck shouted to no one in particular.

"You can't deal with the fact that Blair Waldorf belongs to me. Always have. Always will." Nate scoffed.

Blair heard a loud crash to the floor before she ran downstairs to come face to face with a disheveled ex-lover.

"You need to leave." She said pointedly, helping Nate off the ground.

"Blair…" He pleaded.

"It's Mrs. Archibald to you." Her icy cold stare bore into him, "Dorota, show Ch- Mr. Bass to the door."

As he stepped into the elevator in a weary haze, Blair fought to hold back the tears.

"Just because you can't keep your promises, doesn't mean I don't keep mine."

When he's gone, she breaks down. Falls to the ground. This time it's Nate who helps her up.

"Blair…"

"Let go of me." She fought, running up the stairs.

"Blair!" Nate shouts aggressively, running after her.

"Let go of me Nate!"

Before she knows it, Nate's hard grip has pulled her to the ground, down countless steps of stairs and into a pool of flowing blood.

"Dorota! Call an ambulance!" Nate screams.

August 2nd 2009

"I'm sorry. Because of the stress you've been under, the insomnia and unhealthy eating habits, we couldn't keep the baby." The doctor sympathetically explained.

The words caused a pain that pierced through her heart.

"Get out." She said pointedly. "Get out! Get out! All of you!"

"Blair!" Nate held onto a trembling Blair Archibald, "It'll be alright. It's ok, it's ok."

As the nurses and doctors left the room one by one, her sobs subsided.

"Let's move to France. I can't be here." She looked at him, pleading. The first time she's asked him for anything with such sincerity.

"Okay." Nate replied.

May 26th 2019

Blair Waldorf approached her husband's resting place at nearly dawn. She nearly drops the bouquet of flowers in her hand as she spots the occupied grave.

"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Blair asked viciously.

"Blair..." The other woman pleaded.

"Don't think for one second that you have a right to be here."

"Blair..." She tried again.

"You were always just his dirty mistress. The affairs over, he's dead,
go find another home to wreck."

"Blair!"

"Serena! I don't want to hear it!" Blair had enough.

"Blair," the blonde beauty whimpered softly, "I'm pregnant..."

"I think you should leave."