Title: Of Stars and Spies and Birthday Wishes
Summary: Chuck and Sarah go to the movies, and end up having a real conversation.
Author's Note: This is a little rough. I wanted to post it before I went back to school. Sorry that the point of view shifts around a bit. Also, be warned that this has no plot whatsoever, just a long conversation between Chuck and Sarah.
Disclaimer: Chuck is not mine!
The sound of the doorbell ringing startled Chuck slightly. He wasn't expecting any company – Ellie and Awesome were working, Morgan and Anna were out on a date, and he was pretty sure Sarah or Casey would have called first if something bad had happened in the spy world. Reluctantly, he paused his game of Rock Band and answered the door, only to find Sarah on the other side.
"Hi!" She said brightly.
"Hi, Sarah. Uh . . . what's up?" he replied, ushering her inside.
"Oh, nothing important. I was just bored, and since you mentioned that you'd be alone tonight, too, I thought you might want to hang out."
"'Hang out?' Really?" he asked, but his smile grew as he realized that this night would be spent with Sarah his friend instead of Sarah his handler. No CIA bugs, no bad guys, no explosions. Just the two of them. "I'd like that. What'd you have in mind?"
"I was thinking maybe a movie?"
"Great, let me shut off my X-Box and leave Ellie a note and we can get out of here."
The smile she flashed him in return was enough to make him forget the emotional rollercoaster they'd been riding for the past few months.
"No, I don't want to see an action movie. I deal with that stuff enough."
"Well, not all of us carry knives in ankle holsters, okay? And the fight scenes are supposed to be great!"
"I want to see something calm."
"Like a drama? I don't want to cry."
"You cry at movies?"
"If they're sad! Wait a minute, you don't?"
"Of course I cry. Just not very often."
"Okay, how often it not very often?"
"Are you asking me how many movies I've cried at?"
"Yes, I am."
She stared him down. They'd been standing in front of the marquee at the theater for the past fifteen minutes trying to decide on a movie. In line at one point, they'd been forced to leave and stand beside it while arguing.
As Sarah was thinking about Chuck's question, a man who had been standing close to them in line said loudly to his date, "Geeze, it must be their first date after the wedding!"
Sarah's eyes narrowed, and Chuck had seen that look enough to know that if he didn't do something quickly, what followed would not be good. Before she could turn to fully face the man, he held her back as best as he could, and babbled, "A comedy then! I think I'm sort of in the mood for a comedy, because who doesn't love a laugh once in a while, right? And Sarah, I think you could use one, too! Come on, let's go, the end of the line."
He dragged her to the back of the line, where they stood side by side, Sarah with her arms crossed, shifting from foot to foot to get a better look at the offending man, who was a few people in front of them. Chuck eyed her nervously, hoping she wouldn't do anything rash, but she seemed to calm down as they moved ahead in the line.
When the man had safely bought his tickets and fled from their sight, Chuck adjusted his baseball cap and asked, "Well?"
"Well, what?"
He paused before turning to look her in the eyes, "How many movies have made you cry?"
She didn't respond right away, and neither was sure how much time passed before they were called back to the present by the teller asking rather angrily, "May I help the next customer please?"
Sarah watched him as he jumped ahead to buy two tickets. He grinned as he animatedly talked to the woman who was selling tickets. Surprisingly, she brightened up noticeably, even smiling and telling Chuck to enjoy the movie. Anyone who could cheer up a woman working in public service was a worthwhile guy.
"Ready?"
She nodded, and felt daring enough to wrap an arm around his waist. In the lobby, he ducked into the bathroom while she went to buy snacks. When he came out, she was sipping out of a large Coke with two straws. They began walking toward the theater, and she handed him the popcorn and a box of Milk Duds.
He stopped, stunned at the gesture.
"You remembered?" he asked incredulously.
"Of course I did," she replied, turning around. "But if we miss the movie because you're stuck to that piece of the floor, then I might conveniently forget next time."
She laughed a little, and reached out her free hand. He stuck the box of candy on top of the popcorn, and took her offered hand, which she proceeded to swing between them like they were teenagers.
"Next time," he murmured to himself.
They were laughing as they walked out of the movie theater, something they didn't do frequently enough. Chuck's arm was flung across Sarah's back, and hers was tucked around his waist. To passersby, they were just another young couple in a burgeoning relationship.
"Thank you, Chuck," Sarah gasped between laughs, "I haven't been to see a movie in a theater in years."
"Yeah? I'm glad you had fun. Even if you did almost get us in a fight before we got inside." He grinned at her, and they burst out laughing again.
"I totally could have taken him!"
"I know you could have. Especially with those knives you've got wrapped around your ankle."
"Or maybe I would have let you protect me!"
"Oh, because I'm sure that would have worked out well."
Their laughter subsided as they wound their way back to Chuck's car. Chuck looked down at his Converse All-Stars, watched and heard themslap, slap, slap on the pavement beneath him.
Sarah looked at him sideways. He was contemplative, and she wanted to know what he was thinking about. So she nudged him a bit. "Hey."
He turned to her nervously, "Hey."
She looked him in the eyes.
He cleared his throat and looked down again. "Do you miss it?"
"Miss what?"
"Real life."
They stopped walking. She shifted to face him; he smiled sheepishly at the sidewalk.
"When you join the agency, they teach you to reevaluate things. You make catching bad guys more important than spending time with your family. I hadn't realized how much I'd missed what I'd left behind until I rediscovered it." While she was speaking, Chuck's eyes had slowly drifted back to her face. When their gazes finally met, she whispered, "Until you helped me rediscover it."
"And what's so bad about being normal?"
She sighed, unsure of how much to tell him. She desperately needed to confide someone, and he was the one she trusted the most. But he was also still a civilian, for the most part, and what he had seen on their jobs was only a fraction of the danger in the world. "Even simple concerns are distracting. An agent's concentration is essential to the completion of a mission. If an agent – if I get too emotionally involved, I will be pulled from this operation." She hoped he would hear the words she left unspoken: And I'll never get to see you again.
Disgruntled, he slid his arm off her shoulders and continued down the sidewalk. "And this? Here with me? Am I a distraction?"
As both seemed to realize that the conversation was spinning out of control, they were silent until they reached the car, walking on opposite sides of the walk and looking in different directions. While he unlocked the car and opened the passenger side door for Sarah, Chuck regretted the turn the evening had taken. Just a few minutes prior, they'd been laughing easily, like old friends. She was about to get in the car, but changed her mind and turned abruptly, startling him.
Their proximity only served to increase the tension from the previous few minutes. His hand on the top of the car door brushed her shoulder, sending a tiny spark through her.
Sarah forced herself to take a deep breath before looking Chuck in his eyes and asking, "Do you remember what I said to you on our first date?"
He tried to inject some levity into the situation. "That you weren't a cannibal?"
She smiled. "No, that I liked you."
He said nothing, just stuck his hands in his pockets, closing himself off from her.
"Do you remember?" she pressed, reaching to push up the bill of his baseball cap to get a better look at his face.
"Yeah, yeah, I remember." He finally responded with downcast eyes.
"I meant it, Chuck," she emphasized, placing her hand on his forearm and keeping it there until he raised his eyes. "I'm sorry I can't tell you everything about myself, that I can't even tell you a lot, but that doesn't mean what I do tell you isn't true. I omit things, I can't tell you certain things, but I don't intentionally tell you outright lies. Okay?"
"Unless it's for my own protection, right?" His lips curled slightly upward.
"Right," she agreed.
He nodded, and her hand on his arm suddenly felt intensely personal. She jumped back a bit, and slid into the car. He shut the door, circled the car to hop into the driver's seat, and started the ignition.
Before pulling out of the parking space, though, he looked in her general direction and said quietly, "Thank you."
She asked, her voice equally soft, "Want to know something?"
They carefully avoided the other's gaze, but they wore matching smiles.
"Something real?" he asked as he turned at an intersection.
"Yeah, something real."
"Yeah."
"It's my birthday tomorrow."
"Chuck, why are we at the Large Mart?"
"Relax, I know it's our competition, but it's open 24 hours, so it's pretty much our only option," Chuck said as he pulled into a parking space. "Just don't tell Big Mike, okay?"
Sarah nodded, and moved to open the door, but he made a noise that she took to mean to not move. "What?" she asked.
"You, stay in the car. Heh, I like getting to say that." He imitated Casey, "Stay in the car!"
Before she could object, he had hopped out and was on his way to the store. She only had to wait about ten minutes before he was back with a bag clutched in his hand. Before she could sneak a peek at it, he stashed it beneath his seat.
"Where are we going?" she queried.
"You'll see."