Note: This is a horribly written first chapter, sorry. I am trying really hard to make the story fit together, if you have any ideas fo me plz feel free to tell me. I have a rough version of the story in my head but I'm always open to changes. Thanks : )

BPOV (Bella's point of view)

He's gone. Edward left me again. I guess I can't blame him. This time he was the one who almost killed me, not Victoria, not James, not just any other vampire, him.

He left the night that he tried to change me. It had gone horribly wrong. He had started and, just like he had warned me, he couldn't stop. It was terrifying. He had leaned in and I had felt the bite. It had barely hurt at all; it was like a kiss only it had a slight pinch. I heard him drinking, it was a stomach turning noise, and I couldn't believe that it was coming from my darling Edward, but it was. I could smell it too. The scent of the blood made me want to puke. It was making me faint (well that, and the fact that I was loosing blood). That was when it hit me, Edward had promised that he wouldn't drink anymore than necessary, and he had been making that awful noise for quite a while, he had lost himself to the monster. I knew that all of Edward's fears, all of the things that I had told him not to worry about, were coming true. I was dying at the hands of a vampire, and the vampire was the one person in the world that I cared most about. When I realized what was happening I started struggling, but I was no match for him. I was pushing on him as hard as I could and trying to pull my neck away from his mouth, but he just held on tighter, and he started to hurt me, I could feel the bruises forming where his fingertips were holding on to my neck. The worst part about the whole thing was that I barely had any chance of being rescued. All of the other Cullens had gone hunting because I didn't want any of them there when Edward was changing me. Edward had insisted on them staying but they had listened to my request in the end. I was an idiot.

Edward bit harder and this time it hurt, a lot. I cried out in pain. Edward quickly drew back, holding his breath, a look of pure terror on his face. I just lay on the bed in his room, holding my hand to my neck and fighting to keep consciousness.

"I…I…I'm so sorry Bella, I really am. I…should…leave," he stammered. I could tell he was completely mortified. Even though I thought he should have been relieved, he hadn't killed me after all.

Within minutes the rest of the Cullens had gotten there. Carlisle was the first one in the room. Edward must have went and told them what had happened. Carlisle went to work right away. He stopped the bleeding and stitched up my neck. Miraculously I was still alive, but I had lost a lot of blood. Soon I realized why everyone was staring at me expectantly; there wasn't a burning spreading through my body. After all of that, I wasn't even changing. I looked to Carlisle but he had the same look as the rest of them, a mix of confusion and anxiousness. For some reason that nobody could explain, not even Carlisle, I wasn't changing. I was totally heart broken, not only had my love left, but I hadn't changed. It was horrible.

This time is worse than the first time he left. Not only am I completely numb and empty, but I now know that I am more of a freak than I was before. I can't be changed into a vampire. I'm probably the only human in the world who has ever been in love with a vampire, I'm most likely the only human who has ever seriously wanted to be a vampire, and now I'm the only person who can't be changed into a vampire. Life is totally unfair.

I know that the story changes from present tense to past tense, but that is because the past tense is just Bella telling what had happened right before Edward left. I'm sorry this is so badly written. The story is like a puzzle in my head, but I only have the big pieces, so I need many more small pieces to fit the big ones together. This first chapter is mostly made up of small pieces.

If you want to see more of the big pieces I need at least 3 reviews.

P.S. if the pieces thing makes no sense to you, I am truly sorry (heavy sarcasm), but it makes sense to me so there, plus that's too bad I don't honestly care what you think (insert evil laughter here)