Perfect
Disclaimer: Naruto will never belong to me.
Notes: In which I prove that I'm cheesy, dumb and all kinds of moronic. Yet, I like this – it was surprisingly easy to write. The writing style is also less intimidating and wordy.
There's nothing more pathetic than being a virgin at forty.
Someone once told her this.
Yet, most of the time, Sakura doesn't really pay attention to such words of warning. It's rubbish, anyway. There's nothing bad about being a virgin: it's not like one misses out that much. There's nothing tragically beautiful in having your heart broken. And, damn, she knows what that feels like.
Yet, now, the words haunt her, whispering into her ears, and she can't help wondering. She doesn't even know why she wonders about it right now. Odd.
Well, she's definitely not forty and still a virgin (and she's got no intention of doing the deed any time soon, mind you), but she's sixteen-going-on-seventeen and still hasn't kissed anyone. And that's pathetic, or so her not very supportive – supposedly best friend – tells her.
"Come on, you can't tell me that you still haven't managed to lock lips with anyone? There's tons of boys out there who are desperate for a roll in --"
Sakura interrupts Ino-pig by clasping her hand against her mouth; she's not going to listen to this nonsense. She knows that she's tolerably pretty – she's got a mirror at home, thank you very much. So, she also knows that there's a – as disgusting the mental image is – a queue of boys lining up to get her. Yet, she'd rather die than grace any of those losers with as much as a bat of her eyelid. It's not her they like, but the promise of nice sex and the admiration of their buddies as to finally having gotten laid. She doesn't need that.
"You really think I'm that cheap? I'm not going to kiss just anyone. I want it to be special," she spits out angrily, giving voice to her indignation. She's still holding her hand against Ino's mouth, who is starting to look rather green.
Serves her right, Sakura thinks.
With a swift motion, Ino swats her hand away, but instead of roaring or yelling at her, just gapes at her with bewilderment. She stares at Sakura, as if she's totally jumped on the "I'm off my rockers" bandwagon.
"What?" the other demands, annoyed. She really doesn't know why Ino is that shocked. She hasn't said anything weird, has she? Or has it become the norm for girls to just waste their first kiss on some idiot?
"Don't tell me you're still hung up on Sasuke-kun!" Ino finally manages to blurt out.
Sakura snorts. "No, I'm not...he's made it very clear that he doesn't care for me in that way."
Her voice is clear and steady when she says it – clear enough that she could fool herself into thinking that some part of her isn't bitter or sad. Yet, that's not the truth – she is angry, not because he rejected her. She is angry because he rejected everything, friendship, Naruto and ... she doesn't want to think about it.
For a brief second, Ino clasps her hand and gives it a firm squeeze: it's a foolish, girlish thing to do, but it works. Sakura feels better and is grateful that someone does understand. Therefore, she decides to confide in Ino.
"It's Naruto I like – no love. I just wish he'd finally realise that."
If Ino is surprised, she doesn't show it. Perhaps, she really isn't that shocked because nothing on her face looks vaguely like confusion or not getting the point. She merely nods her head and looks intently at Sakura, expecting to hear more.
Sakura doesn't talk, though. She doesn't feel like explaining herself. The thing is she can't explain it – falling in love with Naruto was different than falling in love with Sasuke. It happened gradually and, somewhere along the line, she just knew, knew that she felt more. Not very spectacular, but that's the way it was.
"Have you told him?"
"No...," Sakura starts, taking a deep breath before continuing, "I don't know how to get around it. I don't want to ruin our friendship."
There you have it, she thinks, it's dumb childish and, yeah, cliché as all are anxieties are. However, it's true: she's come to cherish Naruto's friendship – that devoted, strong and unbreakable bond – more than anything else. She doesn't want to make things awkward by coming out with a "hey, I'm totally in love with you" confession. That would be very strange and she hasn't got the guts do that.
She doesn't even know whether he even likes her anymore. Okay, that's the truth either; she knows that Naruto likes her. He's made it clear to her more than once.
"Yeah, but it's just as stupid to wait and never find out."
"Ino. I can't just kiss him and --" Sakura starts, only to have Ino interrupt her.
"Sure, you can. I'd never be with Shikamaru now, if I hadn't taken the initiative."
Sakura rolls her eyes: Naruto isn't Shikamaru. Naruto is loud, energetic and wouldn't shy away; if he had wanted to kiss her, he would have done it. But then again, Sakura isn't really sure. And, maybe, Ino isn't that wrong.
The problem still occupies her on the way home and she feels silly for wasting so much thought on it. Perhaps, she's really a hopeless idiot. First, she wasted a good deal of her time on Sasuke and now she's wasting her brain cells over such a silly matter.
Sakura doesn't want to wait, though. Even if it will hurt her. She isn't a weak girl and she won't waste tears on a guy. That is something she decided for her herself when Sasuke and Naruto lay feverish under her feet. Back then, she had sworn to protect them and grow stronger. So, she's going to be strong now, too, even if a part of her is terrifed.
It starts to rain; droplets of water soak the soft material of her dress and she shivers involuntarily. She hasn't bothered putting anything warm on her; the weather forecasts didn't predict rain.
Oh damn it all. She sneezes and coughs. She doesn't even realise that she's passing by Ichiraku's, Naruto's usual hang-out. Of course, she notices way too late that Naruto is there as well. He's not the person she wants to see right now.
"Hey, Sakura-chan. You're going to get a cold," she hears that familiar voice say and she feels goosebumps cascading down her back. Or butterflies forming in her stomach. Whatever. She doesn't have time for poetic expressions right now.
"Here," Naruto says and gives her his jacket. It's still that disgusting orange and smells like musk, sweat and grass, but Sakura doesn't mind. It's Naruto's and, just like him, it's comforting. While not everything that shines is gold, not everything that smells fishy and scratches her skin is horrifying either.
"Whatcha doin' here?" he asks her, sliding into step with her and joining the walk home. She didn't ask him to accompany her, but isn't against him doing it, anyway. It's not like he ever really listens to her protests; he'd do anything to protect her.
"I just went to see Ino and all. I was just on my home."
Naruto just nods his head cheerfully and they fall into comfortable chatter for the rest of the journey. Sakura hasn't asked him to accompany her, but he does it, anyway. And she's not protesting.
The rain falls in gentle drizzles and it isn't even cold anymore. Or she doesn't sense it. Times passes away quickly and Sakura, when they're in front of her apartment door, gathers the courage and asks:
"Naruto, do you think it's dumb for a girl to make the first move?"
He doesn't get her and glares at her in confusion. Sakura sighs. Perhaps, this isn't a good idea, after all.
They've stopped walking now and Naruto is trying his damnest to understand, but he fails. He really is a clueless idiot at some things, Sakura reasons and figures that it's time to attempt something else. She'll have to be direct.
"Do you like me, Naruto?"
"Sakura-chan, of course...I like you. You know that. I'll always protect you," he gives her to understand with earnest passion and -- what really captures her attention – is the blush forming on his face. It seems that he can't deal with her looking intently into his face and he's never looked more like a little.
"And that will never change?"
"No. Never."
Sakura tenses, not because she's afraid, but excited. She doesn't even know why. Maybe, it's because she's an idiot and idiots are always excited over nothing. Yet, this isn't nothing to Sakura.
Naruto's hair falls in tangles over his face and now that it's wet, it's longer too. He looks nice, she thinks – handsome even. No, he isn't unnaturally beautiful like Sasuke, but he's welcoming, warm and that's more than she needs.
"So, I'll get going then," he says, his voice joyous and friendly, but Sakura doesn't pay much attention.
His eyes widen slightly when she moves up closer to him and touches his cheek; he's taller than her, but not tall enough to forgo her touch.
"Sakura...what are you-"
He never gets to finish the sentence because Sakura silences him. It's a strange to feel his warm lips brush against her own; there's no fireworks nor any sensations akin to explosion forming in her chest. But it feels good – his lips are soft, much softer than expected. He isn't pulling away either and though his kisses are clumsy, he's kissing her back ... and that's the only thing that really counts, in the end.
He feels warm as well and Sakura feels much warmer when he pulls her closer, wrapping his arms around her waist. She knows she hasn't screwed up things and, this can only be a beginning, not the end of anything. And – knowing this -- makes everything perfect.