Chapter 10: Photo Albums

Sarah puttered in the kitchen. She had made breakfast but she was too upset to eat. Last night still rang too loudly in her head. She had finally opened herself up to Chuck and he had turned her down. It had stung.

She heard the shower start at the back of the house. A feeling of unease made her stomach drop. Chuck was awake. But after last night's rejection, she was uneasy. She felt like she was on unstable ground. It was new territory for her, and the once fearless agent was terrified.

-o-

Chuck popped into the kitchen looking for breakfast. His hair was wet from his shower and it was more curly than normal. He was all smiles and his gangly body was full of energy. It was in stark contrast to Sarah, who was feeling a mish mash of hurt, anger, and confusion.

Seeing Sarah in the kitchen made Chuck happy. Last night had been difficult, but he felt stronger somehow. He was still confused about their relationship, but it was the first time in a long time…that he felt hope.

However as he started to serve himself food, their eyes made contact. Chuck's smile vanished when he saw the raw emotion in Sarah's eyes. She looked lost and he felt guilt for the vulnerability he saw there. He realized that his rejection had chinked the armor of his seemingly invincible protector.

It amazed him. Had his rejection really affected her?

When she had asked him to make love to her, alarms had gone off in his head. He knew that if he made love to her, she would be his addiction. It was like offering an alcoholic one drink. He wouldn't survive, if he could only have Sarah for one night. It was better to refrain and live, than to touch a piece of heaven and always be left wanting more. But how could he explain this to her...without losing all sense of pride?

However, the hurt in her eyes engaged his protective instincts. He had protected himself, but had inadvertently hurt her. This was unacceptable to him. He needed to make her feel better.

After an awkward breakfast, Chuck literally dragged Sarah into the living room. He sat them down on the couch. Sarah tried to move to another chair, but he wouldn't let her. Instead, he held her hand.

"Sarah, I'm sorry about last night. I'm probably the biggest moron alive to turn down a single night with you. But being together would have made things more confusing. I'm sorry, if I hurt you," explained Chuck, with a sorrowful look in his eye.

Sarah replied, "Thank you Chuck for telling me that. It means a lot." She smiled wanly.

Chuck realized that he hadn't reached her. Frustrated, he blurted out, "Sarah, it's hard for me to know what's real. But I do trust you. I realize that you weren't planning on killing me."

His pronouncement stunned her. How could he ever believe she would consider harming him? Sarah schooled her face to hide the turmoil within her.

He noticed that Sarah's blank look had returned. He hated that look. She used it to keep him at bay, under the guise of 'professional detachment.' He braced himself. Her blank look normally signaled something bad. Holding his breath, he asked, "Sarah, what happens next?"

Slipping into her professional mode, Sarah explained, "We are here until tomorrow afternoon. We will then be picked up by military transport and delivered to your new employers. You'll be briefed and given the particulars of your new life. You'll be given training and will eventually become an intelligence analyst."

Chuck waited for her elaborate. When she didn't, he tried to gesture for more. She responded by averting her eyes. He realized that Sarah was not going to be more forthcoming voluntarily. Frustrated, he asked somewhat testily, "And whom will I be working for?"

Sarah found it steadily more difficult to answer. Each question seemed to edge closer to revealing the 'real her.' It upset her even though she knew her misgivings were irrational.

Heck, she had brought him to her home. Why was she having such difficulty in telling him where he was? She was so conflicted. Was it the agent in her? Or was it due to the rejection from the previous night? She just didn't know. She willed herself to respond to his question.

"The other two agencies involved were MI-6 and ASIS. You probably know MI-6 from the movies. ASIS is lesser known. I worked for them, when I first started in the intelligence business. Later I was assigned on some joint projects with MI-6 in Europe. They were successful, and arrangements were made to loan me out to the CIA for similar assignments. Anyway, your new employer is ASIS."

Chuck could see that her posture had become more rigid. Her face held a blank expression. He could tell that she was reluctant to answer his questions.

"And what does ASIS stands for?"

Chuck watched as her eyes widened. She replied tersely, "It stands for Australian Secret Intelligence Service."

Sarah's posture became even more rigid, and the tension in the room increased. Chuck started to feel a slow burn in his stomach, as he watched her body language. Narrowing his eyes, he asked, "Does that mean you're Australian?"

She gulped. Allowing him to know the 'real Sarah' terrified her. But it was now or never. Sarah slipped into her native Australian accent. "Yes Chuck, I'm Australian." She monitored Chuck closely, looking for rebuke.

Sarah's accent startled him. She sounded like a stranger.

Even worse, he had never imagined that when she finally told him something about herself, it would make her so blatantly unhappy. It upset and saddened him in a way that he couldn't describe. It also made him a bit mad. Why couldn't she trust him even half as much as he trusted her?

Sarah saw Chuck's reaction. She was sure that her Australian accent had upset him. She cringed at the thought. She decided it was best to maintain her American accent. "Is this better?"

He just nodded. When she talked in an American accent, she seemed less like a stranger. He didn't see her flinch at his nod.

Ignoring her hurt feelings at his reaction, she continued, "Chuck, you'll be trained like a regular analyst. The Service will put you in a safe house and you will have a security detail. But beyond that, you'll be free to explore Sydney and the surrounding areas. You'll have a relatively normal life, except for the added security." She hoped it pleased him.

"Will you be in charge of my security," asked Chuck, warily. He didn't like her reference to a security detail. In the past, she had always referred to herself as his handler. Security sounded too vague and unfamiliar. What was Sarah trying to say?

This questioned startled Sarah. She fought to control her emotions. ASIS was well aware of her feelings towards Chuck. In fact, they had used her feelings to convince her to bring him to Australia.

She had been tagged as a 'personal relation' to him. As such, she would never be placed on his security detail. She grimaced. She was technically considered his 'girlfriend.' Their living arrangements had not been finalized, but she suspected that ASIS assumed that they would live together. It was something she desperately wanted, but she didn't know how to admit it to Chuck.

"No. I will likely be re-assigned to some other project. But we will both work for ASIS." The words seemed hollow to Sarah even as she said them. She tried to assess Chuck's reaction.

Chuck tried to be brave. Sarah had sacrificed her position at the CIA to protect him from their plans. He was grateful, but he felt like he was being abandoned.

He hated it. But he had to ask, "Will I get to see you every so often?"

He looked away from Sarah; he didn't want her to see his vulnerability.

Sarah saw that Chuck was upset. He wouldn't even look at her. She wanted to say everyday. She wanted to say that they could live together. She wanted to say so much, but she just couldn't.

"I'm sure you can see me whenever you want. We are friends you know." She smiled weakly.

The word 'friend' stopped the conversation. It was like a match to kindling. All of Chuck's pain and frustration surfaced. His temper blazed. He was livid.

"What the hell are you talking about Sarah? We're not friends. We've never been friends. We've always been more than that. Why are you doing this?"

"Stop yelling at me. I don't know what you mean," replied Sarah automatically, even though she knew exactly what he meant.

Chuck paced the room frantically. Sarah had called him a 'friend' and was not going to be on his security detail. His world was tilting upside down. He yelled, "Yeah right Sarah, like I believe you."

"Are you saying I lied?" retorted Sarah, angrily.

"What could you lie about? Since you have barely told me a thing! It's like pulling teeth for you to tell me anything. Hell, it has been two days and you haven't even told me where I am!"

Sarah knew logically that her anger was misplaced. But it felt good. It was much better than the hurt and anxiety that she felt about her relationship with Chuck. She let her anger simmer.

She stalked up to Chuck with her fists at her side. "You're on the western side of Queensland near the Northern Territory of Australia."

Chuck rolled his eyes mockingly. "Well, that explains a lot. Yep, I'm with a bunch of sheep in Queens-fucking- land, wherever the hell that is," yelled Chuck, as his frustration peaked.

Sarah turned away from him and stalked around the room looking to break something. Nothing she said seemed to please him.

Frustrated at her lack of progress, she offhandly remarked, "If it makes you feel any better, we're leaving for Sydney tomorrow anyway. I don't even know why I bothered bring you home in the first place."

Chuck suddenly tensed. He stormed over to Sarah and grabbed her arm, and asked angrily, "What do you mean by home?"

Her training automatically engaged at his rough grip on her arm. "If you care anything about owning two arms, I suggest you remove your hand right now," seethed Sarah, in a deadly voice.

Chuck glared at her. "Yeah?"

Sarah stood her ground. "Yeah."

-o-

The air bristled as they glared at each other. Anger morphed into something more intimate; something more passionate. Chuck dropped her arm and closed the distance between them. His fingertips gripped her lower jar and he stared at her lips for a second.

Chuck captured her mouth with his own. Sarah was momentarily surprised, but quickly recovered as she joined in their union. Her arms wrapped around his neck, and she arched her chest into him; making him groan.

They kissed mindlessly, both desperate to get as close as possible. Sarah frustrated with Chuck's height, tripped Chuck to the ground with a wrestling move she had learned. They landed together with an 'umph.' They were a tangle of arms and legs and their kisses were barely interrupted by their fall.

Finally, he stopped to catch his breath. His eyes turned soft as he gazed into her cobalt blue eyes. He nuzzled the side of her face and asked, "What did you mean by home?"

She closed her eyes and responded, "Chuck, this is my home. I grew up here." She turned to face him and looked deeply into brown eyes. "I wanted to share where I grew up."

He trembled, and then gave her his biggest Chuck Bartowski smile. She couldn't help grinning back, his happiness was infectious.

She tried to answer the barrage of questions he leveled at her. Finally, in attempt to stop the onslaught of questions, she grabbed his hand and led him upstairs to her childhood bedroom. Chuck regarded the room with awe. Sarah was sharing something very important with him, and he felt almost solemn as he gazed around the room.

Then he saw some photo albums tucked in the corner on the bottom shelf of the bedside table. Sarah looked over and grinned. She let go of his hand and grabbed one of the photo albums and sat on the bed. She patted the spot beside her. Chuck joined her and together they sifted through the photos of young Sarah and her family. It felt so natural and bright. She amused him with stories behind each of the photos.

In that moment their lives altered as a new bond was created between them. Neither would be quite the same again.

After looking at all the photos, Sarah stood up and put the last of the albums back. She looked at him questioningly.

Chuck had a look on his face that she had never seen before. It was mesmerizing in its intensity.

"Sarah, is there anything else I need to know that could affect you and me?"

Her heart rate soared. Their moment was now.

"Chuck, I've made enemies of a lot of dangerous people during my career as an agent. They would have me dead, if they could find me," explained Sarah slowly.

Chuck's eyes narrowed. "I'm the Intersect. I am in constant danger of being captured and tortured for the secrets in my head."

She smiled and remarked, "I guess we are two of a kind. Who else would take us?" He just shrugged.

"Do you love me, Sarah?" The question drilled into her soul.

"Yes, Chuck. I have for awhile now."

"Good. Because I love you and I can't imagine living without you again. I want to be together. Just you and me."

Sarah pushed him backward onto the bed and laid on top of him. Staring deep into his eyes, she replied, "Me too."

She gave him a long passionate kiss that promised a whole lot more.

Stopping, she jokingly asked in a full Australian accent, "You're not going to turn me down again are you?"

"Sarah, I think I like your accent. It kind of makes me feel a little 'you know.' I might not turn you down this time," commented Chuck, playfully.

Her eyes widened at his teasing. But then she grinned and punched him in the stomach playfully. She started kissing him and Chuck didn't even consider turning her down this time.

-o-

After a VERY exhausting day, they laid in bed cuddled together. Both were beaming as they considered their future together. Suddenly, Chuck let out a frustrated sigh and he punched his pillow.

Concerned, Sarah looked at him and asked, "What's wrong?"

Chuck looked upset. "I don't know your real name! We made love for the first time and I forgot to ask you. I am such a moron." He let out a frustrated sigh.

Sarah gazed at him with her heart beaming. She loved the fact that he was so considerate of her feelings. It made her happy that he wanted to know her real name when they made love.

"You already know it," quipped Sarah. She laid back and considered the ceiling. She knew that she had laid a bombshell on him.

"What?" He invaded her line of vision. She grinned and pulled him down for another kiss.

After a few satisfying kisses, she explained, "My name is Sarah. Well technically Sarah Ann. My mom liked long names."

"What?" He gave her a classic Chuck look of puzzlement.

"On short assignments, I sometimes used my real first name. My mission with you started out as a quick hit, so I used the name Sarah. When it turned into a long term assignment; the damage was already done. You knew me as Sarah, so for consistency, the CIA had me maintain the name."

"So when we were…you know…I was using your real name?"

"Yep. When you calling out my name in the throws of passion….you were using my real name!" She loved the red coloring that appeared on his cheeks. It was so cute.

"So what's your last name?"

Sarah immediately thought, 'Bartowski.' She liked the idea and smiled wistfully. She looked back at Chuck and it must have been the longing in her eyes, because he blurted out, "Now what was that about?"

Sarah looked away embarrassed. He had caught her in tender moment. He used his thumb to turn her chin towards him.

"Hmm…what thought brought that look to your eyes?" Sarah eyes widened and then she batted her eyes before averting them. She clearly was unwilling to share.

"Come on, Sarah…no more secrets…tell me," coaxed Chuck, sprinkling small kisses along her jaw.

"Okay, okay. I can't believe I'm telling you this. I thought Bartowski sounded nice," laughed Sarah, aghast that she actually shared the thought with him.

Chuck suddenly looked serious and it made her nervous. "Was that a proposal?"

Sarah's eyes widened and she responded quickly, "No!"

Chuck laid back down on the pillow. "Good, because it wasn't very romantic. Besides I'm the romantic one. I should do the asking. If I left it to you…we would never have any romance."

Sarah laughed at the statement. "I can be romantic too," retorted Sarah.

"No you can't," responded Chuck, rolling his eyes for effect.

"I kidnapped you and spirited you away to my family home! That's romantic! We are in a veritable love nest."

"Sarah, you were assigned to kill me but shot me with a tranquilizer instead. You drugged me and had me on a feeding tube for twelve days. You shipped me half away around the world and dumped me on a sheep farm. Albeit a nice sheep farm, but come on…a sheep farm. Then you wouldn't tell me that it's your family home or where I was. But you did threaten to break my arm. Oh, did I mention that you sold me to a foreign government?"

"Okay, Okay…stop! I didn't sell you to a foreign government. I just loaned you out. Don't complain! How many people can say that they've ridden in a nuclear submarine?"

He looked startled. "Was I really on a submarine?"

She nodded mischievously. "All the sailors had eyes for me, and they were all jealous because I had eyes only for the unconscious you."

"Sarah, you probably were the only woman on the ship. Of course they would have eyes only for you," mocked Chucked playfully.

"That and I kept giving you sponge baths." She grinned at his look of horror.

-o-

Captain John Barclay was finally on leave. As promised, he had spirited his his wife, Natalie, to Sydney for a getaway weekend. They walked along the Circular Quay, which was the gateway to city and harbor area for locals and tourists alike.

"Will you look at that couple? They must be newlyweds. Remember when we looked like that?" remarked Natalie, wistfully.

Captain Barclay smiled and absently scanned the crowds looking for the couple in question. His smile faltered, however, when he recognized the couple that his wife pointed out.

It was the blond haired female spy and the dark haired young man that he had transported across the Pacific last year. They were holding hands and leaning into each other, as they casually walked towards him and his wife.

The spy was laughing and it was clear that she and the brown hair man were romantically involved. But her playful demeanor disappeared, when the blond spy spotted him. Her smile was replaced with an assessing look. It was almost predatory in its intensity.

His wife squeezed his hand. She had become alarmed by the blond woman's intense gaze. However her alarm dissipated, when the spy became distracted by the dark haired young man, who seemed to falter as a glazed look overtook him. But then, just as suddenly, the dark brown haired man recovered. He then stared directly at the Captain and his wife and smiled broadly. He leaned down and whispered something to the blond spy.

The young man dragged the blonde spy towards them. He had a warm, open demeanor about him, which was in stark contrast to his companion. He greeted the Captain and his wife enthusiastically.

"Captain Barclay, I wanted to thank you for giving my wife and I... a lift home last year," exclaimed the brown-haired young man. Barclay glanced at their hands. He saw their wedding bands.

"You gave them a lift," asked Natalie, clearly puzzled.

The blonde spy smoothly replied, "Your husband gave us a ride, when our car broke down last year." She obviously did not want the Captain to mention their trip on his submarine.

Natalie was satisfied by the explanation and they exchanged a few more pleasantries. Captain Barclay noticed that the blonde spy shrugged off two burly unsmiling men, who the Captain guessed were the couple's body guards.

She gave the Captain a small smile and then indicated to her husband that it was time to leave. The dark haired man exchanged goodbyes with the Captain and his wife and then turned to his companion. The young couple seemed to communicate without words.

Watching the young couple, Captain Barclay knew then that his crew was right.

Those two really did have some type of epic romance.