Thanks so much for the great reviews of my first two fics! I think they work best as they are, though, so I don't think I'll be adding to them. Sorry!
Disclaimer: Although it was on my list, I did not get Chuck for Christmas, so it does not belong to me.
Chuck glanced at Sarah from the driver's seat. She'd been silent the whole ride. She was always quiet, but she'd barely said a word all day, even during tonight's mission, which, to his surprise (and relief), hadn't been catastrophically unsuccessful. Even Ellie had noticed Sarah's depression that morning, when the blonde came to ride to work with Chuck. She had made a point of pulling him aside and telling him to take it easy on her today, to not bother her too much with talk of Star Wars or Guitar Hero or hard drives.
Which didn't leave many conversation topics.
So except for a few mundane comments about weather and traffic that required only monosyllabic answers, Chuck was silent, too. He hoped she knew that she could come to him if she needed a friend. Because they were friends, after all. For the past few weeks, after the Buy More holiday party, they'd spent more time together and had gotten to know each other a bit better. And each minute confirmed that he was more than just attracted to her looks; he liked her for who she was – despite the fact that she'd never seen Lord of the Rings or read Dune.
He pulled the Nerd Herder into a parking space and shifted it into park. He sighed, unsure of how to say goodnight and expecting her to hop out quickly and retreat to her lonely apartment. He was about to say something when he saw that she hesitated, her hand hovering over the door handle.
Sarah turned to him slightly, but didn't look him in the eye. "Do you want," she asked, her voice barely a whisper, "Um, will you stay with me tonight?"
Chuck didn't speak, only nodded, afraid that if he opened his mouth the worst possible thing he could say would come out. She brightened a little, but not significantly, and he turned the car off and followed her into the building. The elevator ride was awkward, and he was chafing to blurt out something, anything. But he kept his mouth shut, trying to focus on her needs instead of his own. And right now, she just needed someone to be there for her. A quiet someone.
"Do you want something to drink?" she asked as they entered the darkened apartment.
She turned on a few lamps, and he noted with sadness that her voice was subdued, that the usual animated inflection was gone. He wasn't sure what Sarah expected of him. But he remembered Ellie's words, and decided he should be the one taking care of her.
"No, but let me get you something. Coffee? Tea, maybe? Hot chocolate?"
"Tea sounds wonderful," she said with a soft smile.
That smile, small as it was, was enough to stop him for a moment, to make him feel like he would sacrifice anything to erase whatever was causing her pain. He wished he were a superhero – a standard one: Superman, the Hulk, the Flash; or perhaps her own personal one: Nerd Man maybe – so he could rescue her.
But as he headed to the kitchen to make her tea, he knew she wasn't the kind of woman who needed to be rescued. She was strong, much stronger than he was. So why was she breaking? And she broke very differently from most girls he knew – more quietly, and with much less crying. He selected a mug from a very sparse cupboard, filled it with water, and stuck it in the microwave. After debating with himself for a few seconds, he leaned over the sink and called Ellie.
"Hey, Chuck. You're out late. Everything okay?" came Ellie's voice from the other end of the line.
"Uh, yeah, here's the thing," he said quietly, not wanting to disturb Sarah in the next room. He inhaled. Was there anyway to phrase the next thought without giving the wrong impression? "I think I'm going to spend the night at Sarah's." He held his breath, hoping she wouldn't jump to the conclusion that they had 'gotten back together.'
"Okay, I've got the early shift, so I probably won't see you until tomorrow night. Is she doing all right?" Even over the cell phone, he could hear the worry in his sister's voice.
"I don't think so. I'm not sure. . . I don't really know what to do. I'm not good at this kind of thing."
"Just be there for her, Chuck. Listen to her if she wants to talk."
"That's all?"
Ellie chuckled. "Being a friend isn't a science. And I know being Morgan's friend isn't great practice, but just don't make it about you."
"Thanks, Ellie. I'll see you tomorrow."
"Okay, it's your turn to make dinner. Don't forget!"
"Ha, I won't. Bye."
"Bye."
Chuck hung up just as the microwave beeped. He brought in the hot water and tea bag to Sarah, who was sitting with her feet curled up on the couch. She thanked him, but didn't question him about the phone call.
"That was Ellie. I just didn't want her to worry."
She nodded, but he wasn't convinced she had registered what he had said.
Normally, Chuck would be watching TV right about now, but she didn't have a TV. The last time he was over, he offered to set her up with a decent home entertainment system, but she declined. She said that she was so out-of-touch with today's entertainment, that what she watched, she watched only because he recommended it. So she usually ended up watching his DVD box sets on his couch, and he and Morgan usually ended up explaining the details.
She went on sipping her tea, and he went on staring at the wall for a few more minutes before he said, "I hope," he swallowed, "I hope you know that I'm here for you if you want to talk."
Silence.
A sip.
"Thank you."
He nodded his head, fiddled with his thumbs a bit.
"But I don't want to talk."
She took another sip of her tea.
He stopped twiddling his thumbs.
The way she said it.
It confused him.
He missed his comfort zone. His bedroom. His video games. His family, which basically consisted of Ellie, Morgan, and Awesome. And Sarah now. But just a few moments ago, he would have forsaken all of those to help the woman sitting only a foot away from him.
Luckily, she finished her tea only a few sips later and declared it was time to go to bed.
She let him use the bathroom first, so he washed his face, brushed his teeth with toothpaste on his finger, and rinsed with mouthwash for good measure. When he came out, she was in her pajamas, which were thankfully a little less scanty than the purple ones she had insisted on wearing at his house a few months ago, but only a little less.
She slipped into the bathroom to brush her teeth and Chuck stripped down to his boxers. He folded up his jeans and socks, and piled them on top of his Converse All-Stars in the corner. Then he stood at the edge of the bed, wondering which side Sarah liked to sleep on. She probably slept in the middle. Or sprawled across the whole mattress. He smiled to himself at the thought.
He was still staring at the bed when she came back. She stopped, and he thought that she was maybe regretting asking him to stay.
"Everything okay?" she asked, with that concern in her eyes that he had come to recognize.
"Oh, yeah, fine. It's just . . . do you like to sleep on a certain side?"
"What? Oh, no, it doesn't matter."
So he slipped under the covers, and waited for her to turn off the lights and join him. He lay on his back, his eyes open and adjusting to the darkness. He had a feeling he wouldn't be getting much sleep tonight.
"I don't want to talk," she had said.
He was still baffled by that response. A hundred possibilities raced through his mind. Once again, he wished he knew what to do for her.
Inches away from him, she was lying on her back, too. She was still.
"Chuck," she breathed.
He turned his head on the pillow. "Yeah?" He replied.
She looked back at him, and suddenly he realized that he didn't need to know what was bothering her. This was about what Sarah needed. And she just needed to be held.
He had moved closer to her before she could begin to whisper, "Chuck, will you –"
"Yeah."
And she was in his arms.
She snuggled into him, and he squeezed his arms a little tighter around her waist. He noted with a slight smile how good she felt next to him.
With her hair tickling his cheek with each inhalation, he wanted to breathe her in. But he stopped that thought when he felt her breath hitch. As entangled as they were, the sob shook both of them. He was surprised at that, but even more shocked to feel a teardrop fall onto his upper arm. Unable to move much without disturbing her, he placed a small kiss on her bare shoulder and pressed his forehead against the back of her head.
"It's okay," he whispered, "I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere."
The words seemed inadequate against the weight of what she was fighting.
"Until, of course, you tell me to leave."
Sarah made a small noise. He couldn't tell if it was a choke or a laugh, but it was close enough to a laugh that he could pretend. She turned her face and pressed a kiss to the inside of his upper arm. And with that, he knew that she was going to make it through the night.