Title: Remember When It Rained
Genre: smut! – But it's fairly gentle. See also; Plot? What plot?
Rating: NC-17/Soft R for sex and swearing
Spoilers: Season two
Summary: It was raining the first time they made love. Meant to be set mid-late season three, this was my interpretation of how Charlie and Claire got together. Can be read as a sequel to my fic "Internet Dating" but can also be read alone.
Original Post date: 09/09/2006
Disclaimer: the inspiration is from Lost and all the peoples who insisted I write C/C smut at some point AND Josh Groban who wrote the song whose title I stole for the title of the fic.
Authors Note:For those of you who asked for smut? Here tis! I tried to stay away from as many of the smut cliché's as I could but if this is completely horrible, do please tell me as its my first real smut fic (that I've posted anyways) and I'd love feedback.
It was raining the first time they made love.
Everyone had retreated into their meagre shelters when the irrational, torrential down pouring had began again and after several hours of beady eyes staring darkly at the heavy rain which had ruined their afternoon activities, most decided it would be a better idea to just nap it out.
Aaron was quite silent in his cradle, protected by an extra piece of plastic tarpaulin. He had grown used to the sound of rain now – his first thunderstorm had been a terrifying experience for all involved and Charlie claimed that he still sported bruises on his hand from where Claire had squeezed his hand tight enough to cut the circulation off. As for the two of them, they were curled up on Claire's bed – if you could call it that. A mish mash of airplane cushions, her polar fleece blanket and several added embellishments of Charlie's had the place looking cosily dilapidated. It was a place of sleep, of long hours spent wrapped in each others arms, adjusting themselves slowly to a new level of intimacy unsurpassed before now.
Today however…
Claire toyed absent-mindedly with the collar of Charlie's t-shirt as he dozed lightly, occasionally waking up long enough to press a sleepy kiss to her forehead, which was just at the right height for his lips to reach. After this had gone on for some time, Claire – who felt far too awake for her own good – reached up and prodded him gently in the shoulder.
"Charlie?"
"S'matter?" he said immediately, half sitting up. "Izzit Aaron?"
"Nothing's the matter," Claire whispered quickly. "I just can't sleep."
Charlie unglued his eyes and peered at her. "Why not?"
"I don't know," Claire said, a little defensively. "I just can't."
A smile twitched at the corners of Charlie's mouth. "Shall I sing you a nursery rhyme? It worked a treat with Aaron."
"Oh shush," Claire rolled her eyes good-naturedly. "Maybe you should start raving about The Beatles again – that'll have me snoring in no time."
"Oh ha ha," Charlie muttered, still sleep fuddled. "Maybe you should just go to sleep."
"Or we could play a game," Claire snuggled into his chest comfortably.
"We were playing them all the other day," Charlie reminded her. "We finished off with a game of spin the bottle? You remember that right?"
"Of course I remember," Claire murmured. "Because I kept having to kiss you."
"Mmmn," Charlie seemed pleased by the memory.
"But you never kissed me,"
"That's because you got impatient with me constantly holding back and teasing you so you just kept jumping right on in and…"
"I did not."
"Did too."
"Did not!"
"Did too!"
"Well at least I have the stones to kiss you!" Claire broke off the argument with a derisive laugh. "You still haven't kissed me yet!"
"What?" Charlie laughed the word, bewildered. "What do you mean? We've kissed!"
"I've kissed you," Claire compromised grudgingly. "But you haven't initiated a kiss yet – not properly anyways."
Charlie drew back a little, just a little, but quite deliberately nonetheless. His eyes flickered from Claire's eyes to her lips and then back again and he licked his own lips in subconscious anticipation.
"Would you like me to?"Claire edged up a little closer to him, her pale eyes holding his with an intense stare. Charlie gave a slow, delicious shiver as he bent his head slowly, oh so slowly to brush his lips teasingly against hers. In retaliation, Claire's tongue flickered out against his lips only to disappear again and one of her hands moved down the length of his spine, coming to rest for a long moment on the waistband of his jeans. Charlie sucked in a sudden breath when her fingers brushed the sensitive skin of his lower back and his own hands began to do a little wandering of their own.
"Oh!" Claire gasped a little at the feel of cool air on her own lower back – Charlie had just rucked the back of her singlet up with his hand.
"Cold?" Charlie guessed, pressing a kiss to her jaw line and then moving down onto her neck. "Want me to warm you up a bit?"
"Uh…yes?" Claire's eyes fell shut as Charlie began to draw slow, illicit circles on her lower back, taking particular care to let his fingers dance up and down her exposed spine several times like an exotic spider. His lips still working at her neck, Charlie allowed himself several moments of spine-fondling before brushing his hand further up her back, underneath her singlet to tease the hem of her bra – only to retreat just as suddenly. Quite enjoying himself now, he had almost forgotten that he wasn't the only one contributing to this moment – Claire had seemed quite content to let him take the lead until now – which is why he was so surprised when one of her legs snuck in between his and she pressed herself flush against him.
"Mmmn," he hummed his approval against her neck. "A bit eager are we?"
"Maybe I am," Claire whispered, her breath tickling the hairs on the back of his neck and making them frizzle deliciously. "And maybe you should stop kissing my neck and kiss somewhere else instead."
Charlie was delighted by the invitation but decided to tease her a little bit more. He trailed his lips back to hers and she gladly accepted the kiss but he could tell it wasn't what she wanted. Even so, he was surprised when his t-shirt seemed to disappear – almost like magic and Claire was the one kissing down his neck.Not one to complain, Charlie allowed her to experiment a little, her mouth creating a spiral of kisses around his left nipple. "Definitely an eager beaver," Charlie teased gently. "I thought I was meant to be the one doing the kissing though?"
"You were too slow," Claire explained between kisses. "Far too slow."
"I'm a gentleman," Charlie explained, aloof and Claire burst into breathless giggles against his navel. "What?" Charlie demanded, looking down his chest at Claire who was still giggling madly but had the good grace to look up and catch his eyes when she answered.
"You? A gentleman? How so?"
"By letting the lady make the first move," Charlie said archly. "I have also, on occasion, acted quite chivalrous for you and you alone."
"You've always been chivalrous," Claire kissed her fingertips and reached up to brush it along the scar on his forehead. Charlie, genuinely touched by the gesture took her hand in his and squeezed it gently. "Ever since I met you." Her eyes glinted mischievously for a moment before she continued. "But that doesn't mean you can't be wicked every once in a while as well."
"Oh, well now that I have permission…" Charlie practically pounced on her, rolling her onto her back and pinning her arms down. "I might have to take you up on your offer."Claire laughed, soft and low as Charlie began to ravish her neck, moving up slowly to her lips again. She placed her palms flat against his chest and slid them slowly up until her hands slipped effortlessly onto his cheeks and she held his face close to hers as they kissed. Charlie's hands were busy as well, tracing up and down her sides in slow tandem, bringing her singlet higher and higher, exposing her stomach…
"No…" Claire said suddenly, breaking the kiss and pulling her singlet back down again.
"No?" Charlie rocked back a little, unsure of what she meant.Claire continued to tug at her singlet, her cheeks beginning to colour.
"I don't like…look it's just my stomach. It's gross Charlie. It's all slushy and covered in stretch marks."
"Let me see," Charlie's hands moved like lightning, before she could protest, her singlet was folded double over her breasts and he had placed a reassuring kiss next to her bellybutton. "I don't see anything wrong with your stomach at all love."
"It's gross," Claire sat up a little, making a face at the pale skin. "It's all saggy and horrible and I hate it."
"So pretend it isn't there." Charlie offered. "I remember how far it was stretched with Aaron in there – you can't really help it."
Claire sighed and shut her eyes as he traced her side again, his fingertips barely coming underneath the edge of her singlet to find the soft skin of the underneath corner of her left breast.
"Can I…?" she heard him murmur, and without really thinking, Claire nodded.She gasped out loud when his hand slid underneath both singlet and bra and his fingers went straight to her nipple. Forever pragmatic and not really giving a fuck if anyone saw them, Claire stopped Charlie for a moment as she peeled off the multitude of her upper clothing, allowing him full access to her breasts.
Charlie's eyes went as round as saucers at the obvious invitation and set to work immediately, one hand palming her breast, the other sliding underneath her back to bring him closer to her and his mouth moving to her other nipple…
"Hey," Claire whispered suddenly, her voice a little shaky. "Gentle in this area, yeah? They're pretty sore at the moment."
Charlie tried to process this, his mouth trailing along the soft, fine skin on the underside of her breast. He looked up at her thoughtfully, pondering her words for a long moment before finally guessing what she meant.
"Breast feeding?"
Claire nodded and grinned apologetically. "Looks like Aaron's the only one who's going to get to…"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa," Charlie cut her off quickly. "Do not even finish that sentence. That is far too disturbing."
Claire laughed and pulled him back up to her, planting a hard kiss on his lips, an apology which he was all too glad to contribute to. She was almost surprised when she felt his tongue encroach into her mouth but she certainly didn't stop him and she began to respond in kind.It wasn't that they'd never done this before but what precious little time they did manage to find, it usually wasn't long enough for anything more than chaste kisses and the occasional fondle – with the possible exception of one particularly steamy interlude in the jungle when they were meant to be picking fruit and somehow they ended up against a tree, one of Claire's legs wrapped around Charlie's waist and one of his hands down the front of her jeans and…
Just thinking about it made Claire burn. She dragged her nails up his back suddenly, delighting in the hiss that escaped his lips. She found one of his hands with ease and began guiding it in the direction that she wanted him to take. Charlie got the idea almost immediately and gladly pursued it. The angle they were at wasn't helping matters though, and her jeans were far too tight. She seemed to sense the same thing because she began to work at the buttons, the zipper. Charlie's hands moved again, for a moment they felt awkward against her skin, but he'd done this too many times to be clumsy for long.
Her jeans were gone in a fumble of fingers and legs but before he could go any further, she was attacking the top of his jeans. Charlie's breath was anxious against her cheek, his hands gripping her shoulders tightly as her fingers fumbled over his belt.
"Claire…love…" he murmured, his voice more than a little shaky. "I can't be held responsible if I try to…" he paused to dispose of his jeans, glad he had opted to not wear his boxers that day. "…If I try to…"
"I know," Claire pulled back enough to look him in the eyes. "We don't have to…I just have to…" she trailed off, one hand brushing back his long hair away from his familiar grey-blue eyes. Feeling the beginnings of something from him, she sighed suddenly and beckoned him with a finger. "Just…come here."
Charlie obliged all too willingly, one hand moving past the final barrier between them. Claire closed her eyes, swallowing silently as Charlie's fingers set to work – much as they had during their "fruit-picking" interlude.
"You're overdressed," he whispered after a moment or two and his hand stilled. Claire gave a loud "humph" of disappointment but then the next moment she began to wriggle out of her knickers.
"At least I wasn't underdressed," she actually rolled her eyes at him and he chuckled low in his throat. "Unlike you – but then I bet you weren't expecting this when I woke you up from your dozy little nap were you?"
Charlie raised an eyebrow. "And what exactly is…?"
A sudden clap of thunder startled the two of them and they clung tightly to each other for a moment before bursting into breathless giggles.
"And what exactly is this?" Charlie repeated, pressing his chest flush against hers, trying hard to keep himself under control but knowing that there was no way she couldn't feel his hard on by now.
"I thought that much was obvious," Claire bit her lip and allowed one of her hands to trail down to his hip, her eyes cast down as Charlie pressed the corner of his mouth to her cheekbone. "It's not like we're going to get interrupted here – not with the weather like this." Her hand drifted lower again and Charlie choked on a moan as she took a gentle hold of him. She bit her lip again as though the movements of her hand affected her as much as it did him.
"Bloody hell…" he breathed, bending his head down so that he could bury his face against the pale column of her neck. "Claire…"But before he could offer her anything more she was attacking his lips again, her hand moving upwards to pull him on top of her. He fell as carefully as he could, terrified he would hurt her somehow and responded to her kiss in kind. He was almost surprised when her tongue slipped into his mouth, not delicately probing but rather searching madly, clashing against his teeth. He rocked his hips against hers almost unconsciously and she gasped out loud into his mouth at the sensation – so unfamiliar and almost forgotten. Within an instant she was responding with her own motion and the two of them set up a quickening rhythm that seemed to be heading steadily upwards.
Teeth and tongue continued to clash and Charlie actually had to break the kiss, worried that they might be getting ahead of themselves. "Are you…sure?" he gasped, watching her expression earnestly. "We can stop if you…?"
Their pace slowed and almost came to a complete standstill as Claire sighed heavily. "I know we probably should stop," she amended. "But I don't want to."
The two of them hovered uncertainly for a moment, Charlie's fringe falling into his eyes – as grey as the stormy skies outside. There was a soft rumble of thunder and Claire sighed again and brought her hands up to either side of Charlie's face, her thumbs stroking against his cheeks."I don't want to stop." She repeated, trying to make her meaning plain.
"We don't have to…you know." Charlie ventured tentatively, catching onto her meaning but still wanting to give her a scapegoat nonetheless. "If we're really careful…maybe…"
"Really careful," Claire leant up to kiss him softly. "If we're going to do this without any sort of protection then we are going to have to be really careful Charlie."
"I know."
"Me too. And I trust you."
"I'm glad."
"Yeah, me too."
Charlie let some of his weight onto Claire's tiny frame as he bent down to kiss her again – it was too hard to keep hovering over the top of her and his stomach muscles were screaming for rest. Claire hummed a little against his lips as his hands combed through her hair – her hands were still on his face as he shifted a little against her but next moment one of them was grazing down his stomach. Charlie jerked when she took hold of him again, guiding him to the correct place and…
"Fuck…" he murmured against her lips, his eyes shut tight as he bent his face to hers, his forehead moving to touch her cheekbone. "Fuck it's been forever since I've done this."
Claire chuckled a little and the sound vibrated through her chest and into Charlie, creating a gentle syncopation with his own heartbeat. "You haven't done this in forever? I've been pregnant for the better part of a year Charlie."
"I know," Charlie said breathlessly. "But still…fuck…"
"Well we can't stay like this forever," Claire murmured chidingly. "You have to do the next bit – or have you forgotten how to do this?"
"Never," Charlie pulled back enough to press his lips against hers for a long moment before pressing into her a little and then pausing to gauge her reaction. Claire did nothing more exciting than to choke on a small sigh as her eyes fluttered shut and so Charlie went a little further again. "It's like playing guitar – you never forget once you've learnt."
"You're telling me," Claire murmured but then she sucked in a sharp breath and Charlie froze.
"Are you okay?" he asked immediately, a little more than anxious. "I'm not hurting you or anything am I?"
"What?" Claire's eyes snapped open again. "No! Of course not. If anything you're going too slowly…"
"I am?" Charlie blinked sheepishly. "Sorry…I just don't want to hurt you is all. I've never really…with someone who's had a baby before and…"
"I'm not made of glass," Claire reassured him, laughing a little. "So why don't you come on and finish what you started?"
Charlie nodded a little and then asked one final time. "You're sure?"
Claire nodded back. "I'm sure."
Charlie hesitated for a moment longer only before pressing fully inside her, beginning the familiar motion without preamble. Claire let out a soft gasp, her face coming up to his and pressing her mouth to his in a hard kiss, juxtaposing the gentleness of his hands and the slow back and forth motion they were sharing. After several moments, Claire pulled her lips away again and laughed breathily against his face.
"What's so funny?" Charlie panted. "Eh?"
"Are you always this gentle?" Claire questioned breathlessly. "Not that I mind that much but…"
"Like I said," Charlie brushed his lips across the corner of her mouth as he spoke. "I don't want to hurt you."
"Like I said," she moaned a little as he picked up the pace slightly. "I'm not made of glass and that is much better thank you."
"I don't – want – this – to be – quick." Charlie managed to gasp out. "Fuck Claire…I want this to last…"
Claire nodded wordlessly, gasping quietly. "Oh fuck Charlie…"
"What?" Charlie nearly stopped moving he was so surprised. "I've never heard you say that before."
Claire gave a short laugh. "I don't say…it very…often – fuck…"
"Oh is that so?" Charlie panted, one of his hands wandering off again. "Well perhaps I should try a bit harder? Make you say it some more…?"
"Oh fuck!" Claire's eyes widened dramatically when his fingers met their intended target. "Ohhh you bastard – that feels too…too…fuuuuuck…"
"Mission accomplished," Charlie laughed into her hair.
"How is it…that you can still…have breath…to talk this much?" Claire wondered out loud, her sentences choppy and half formed.
"I have good cardio," Charlie said teasingly. "Plus I'm not having wicked things done to me by your hands am I?"
Claire nodded, unable to get out a coherent word. She was getting closer but he was moving too damn slow. He seemed to sense the same thing because he began to increase his speed a little and Claire responded in kind, the two of them moving in a careful dance.
"I think I'm…I'm nearly…" Claire managed to breathe but then she cried out quite suddenly as Charlie pulled out of her, looking thoroughly disappointed as he ejaculated, making a terrible mess.
"Fuck! Fuck…" he paused for a long, embarrassed moment before looking up, disappointment still in his eyes and an apology on his lips. "I'm…I'm sorry Claire. I didn't want to run the risk of getting you pregnant again."
Claire sighed heavily, her hands moving to grasp his face tightly, her thumbs stroking his cheeks again, an acceptance of his apology. But Charlie still wasn't quite finished and he reached a hand up to trace the curved outline of one of her breasts.
"If you'd like, I can still finish it," he offered, his voice uncharacteristically quiet and sincere. "It's not quite the same but it's better than nothing right?"Claire hesitated only a moment before nodding and Charlie set to work, his hand trailing down her body, her stomach, her thigh, agonisingly slow before he finally pressed two fingers inside her. Claire gave something close to a low hiss as he pressed his lips to her hipbone, his hand moving restlessly between her legs. Her right hand shot out to grasp a handful of his hair and she allowed her fingers to scrape through it like claws.
"You're beautiful," Charlie whispered against her hipbone. "You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen Claire."
Claire tried not to make a noise, her lips clamped tightly shut but when he twisted his fingers suddenly, still inside her, she couldn't help but let a moan bubble out past her lips.
"So fucking beautiful," Charlie groaned as Claire pulled a hand through his hair again, a little harder this time. "Ever since I met you I thought it but I never said and God I wish I had. You're so, so, so, so beautiful, inside and outside and back to front and every other way you could be, you're beautiful."
"Y-you too," Claire managed to gasp out. "My God…beautiful…"
"I wish it could rain all the time," Charlie quickened the pace of his hand a little more, delighting in the small sounds falling from Claire's mouth as her hand pawed restlessly through his hair. "Because then…then we could do this all the time. Be just like…this…all the time…"
"Please…" she whispered although she didn't quite know what she was asking for – only that she was close and she needed Charlie to just give her that one final push. "Please…"
"Thank you?" Charlie offered in return, laughing a little at his own joke but a moment later Claire's hips gave a violent hiccup and her hand fell limp from his hair to his bare shoulder and he knew that he'd achieved what he'd set out to do.
As he crawled back up to lie beside her, the temperature seemed to catch up with the two of them and there was a mad scramble for blankets – and each other for that matter. After several moments of adjusting the two of them were finally comfortable and Charlie pressed his face into her long hair.
"I like you." Claire said after several long minutes had passed in companionable silence, a profound note in her voice. "You're the same size as me."
Charlie laughed out loud and switched into banter mode immediately. "What do you mean the same size?" "I mean that you're short, like me," Claire clarified. "Thomas was much taller and it was a constant bother with everything because I could never reach his face. But with you it's not a problem."
"Well," Charlie was unsure how to react to this. "I'm glad to be useful."
"Oh don't worry, you're more than useful," Claire pressed a kiss to his temple. "You're wonderful in fact. And you're beautiful and a talented musician and good in bed... Is your head swollen enough yet?"
"I think it might be. Perhaps you should stop?"
"Maybe you could start instead?"
"You shouldn't need me to tell you that you're beautiful. I thought I already told you – I thought I already showed you that enough today."
"Mmmn yes, I suppose you did." Claire snuggled into him. "You didn't even get grossed out by my stomach."
"That's because it's beautiful," Charlie offered, his voice becoming slower and softer. "I still remember what it felt like when you were pregnant with Aaron – the skin was so tight! It was like touching a drum, all taut and thin and the constant rhythm of his heartbeat inside."
Claire smiled against his chest. "You should have been a poet."
"Poet, musician," Charlie shrugged. "What's the difference in the end? A bit more melody tacked onto the rhythm of the words."
"Mmmn," Claire agreed, her eyes falling shut. "I guess."Charlie continued to talk for a long time, unaware that Claire had quickly fallen into a doze and by the time she had fallen asleep fully, his words had stumbled into a tentative silence and before too long they were both asleep, so wrapped up in each other and the blanket that you could scarcely tell where one left off and the other began.