Draco Dormiens- the Gender Bender Version

or: Draco Dracianna

By: The Travelers Incognito

(original storyline belongs to Cassandra Claire. {Sorry for mutilating your story!} All characters belong to J.K. Rowling, except for Dracianna, who exists only in Harry's fantasies and in our fanfics. The "Draco is a Girl" idea belongs to Gwen-Heifer the Ditzy Cow, who gave us permission to use it.)

Chapter 1: Harry Discovers the Joys of Girls' Undies

"All right, you disgusting toads. This is a polyjuice potion." Professor Snape glared out at the class of squirming Slytherins and Gryffindors he was teaching. He held up a little vial with chunky-looking yellowish liquid in it. "Many of you, considering the microscopic size of your craniums," (he glanced pointedly at Harry and Ron, who were sitting together) "may have never heard of this kind of potion. Can anyone here tell me what it does?"

Hermione, as usual, raised her hand and waved it fervently. Snape ignored her. On the Slytherin side of the room, Draco was squirming away from Pansy Parkinson, who was sitting so close to him that a strand of hair could not pass between them. Crabbe and Goyle drooled on each other happily and scratched their heads.

"Anyone?" Snape asked. Hermione flapped her hand in the air violently. "Besides Miss Granger?" Snape said, giving her a withering look.

Ron, fuming at Snape's apathy toward Hermione, raised his hand. Harry raised his too, tentatively.

"Yes, Mr. Weasley," spoke Snape. "This ought to be interesting. What is polyjuice potion used for?"

"It... um... turns you into... uh... someone else?" quoth Ron, looking at Hermione for support.

"Brilliant observation, Weasley," Snape commented dryly. "Yes, polyjuice potion, as Mr. Weasley so brilliantly put it, makes the person who drinks it turn into someone else. Say young Draco here," he gestured to Draco, who had put a stack of books on each side of his seat so Pansy couldn't sit there, "wanted to take on the appearance of Mr. Gregory Goyle." (Goyle grunted at the mention of his name and grinned stupidly.) "To do this, Mr. Malfoy would take a body part of Mr. Goyle and place it in the already brewed potion."

Ron snickered, imagining Draco cutting off Goyle's arm and putting it in a bubbling cauldron. Hermione shushed him.

"No, Mr. Weasley, I do not mean the kind of body part your doubtlessly twisted little mind is thinking of," Snape growled. "I mean a strand of hair, or a fingernail. Something of that sort. Now, I want you to get the feel of this potion before trying to brew it yourselves, which is why I have already made a portion of it for everyone in this class. You will each find a partner and put one of his hairs in your potion, then drink it. I have only made a very small serving for each student, so the change should last only a few moments. Now, find a partner, everyone."

Ron and Harry began inching toward each other, but Snape noticed and separated them. "I think perhaps Mr. Potter should try branching out a bit today, hmm?" He assigned Draco as Harry's partner.

Harry was miserable. "Ugh, Potter. I certainly don't want to turn into you," Draco sneered. "I suspect the experience will give me nightmares."

"Oh, so you'd rather spend some quality time with your little girlfriend?" Harry asked, indicating with his head Pansy Parkinson, who was gripping the arm of a very unhappy Seamus Finnigan and making cow eyes at Draco.

Draco shuddered. "How can I choose, you're both so delightful."

"Now," Snape cried, rousing the class by flapping his unkempt robes ferociously, "place the hairs in your potion and drink it. And hurry, because class is nearly over."

Harry reluctantly plucked a hair from his head and gave it to Draco. "Rather greasy, isn't it?" the latter remarked, handing Harry a hair in return. "I know I shall feel sick after drinking this." Draco made a face an took a dainty sip of his potion. "Yuck. Essence of Potter."

Harry grumbled something under his breath and drained his beaker of potion in one gulp. At once, he could feel the weird sensation of the polyjuice at work. His nose was growing smaller, and his skin was getting lighter. The hairs on his arms were turning whitish-blond. Draco, on the other side of the table, had one green eye and chunks of black hair growing out of his head.

"Here." Harry handed Draco his glasses. "I don't need them anymore."

"Oh, lovely," Draco/Harry said, squinting at his new reflection in the glass. "I look just like you. Well, like you did." He pushed the glasses up his nose and admired Harry, now looking like Draco. "I must say, Potter, it's a great improvement in your features."

"Oh, shut it. I say, why haven't we begun to change back yet?" They looked around the classroom. Everyone else was either back to their normal appearance or close. Ron/Hermione had bushy brown hair and a gigantic nose with freckles on it, while Seamus still harbored Pansy's singular eyebrow stretching across his forehead.

"Did you do something to that potion, Potter?" Draco asked angrily. "Am I going to end up looking like you for the rest of my life?"

"No," Harry told him hostilely. "D'you think I'd want to be stuck in your body?"

"Yes. I bet you're jealous, Potter. Can't wait to be someone who actually doesn't look like a mountain troll, eh?" But Draco, too, sounded nervous.

"Look, I don't know what you did, but undo it now!" Harry exclaimed, raising his fists.

Draco backed away from him. "Don't have a screaming fit, Potter."

"I WANT MY BODY BACK! Give it back!" Harry/Draco lunged forward and tripped over one of the many books that had been Draco's shield from Pansy. He fell onto a desk, and, banging his head hard against one of its corners, was knocked unconscious.

* * *

When Harry awoke, he was lying in a rather lumpy bed, and someone was rubbing his face with a watery substance that didn't smell very good. "Umph," he growled, looking up at the perpetrator of the stuff on his face. "Whassat?"

"Oh, Anna dearest! I was so worried," said the woman who was grinding the fetid washcloth into his forehead. "I've been trying to wake you up with smelling salts for hours."

Harry was extremely confused for a while. The woman looked vaguely familiar, but he couldn't quite place where he'd seen her. She was worried now, but before she had looked like she was disgusted at something. Wait... he knew. She'd been in the stands of the quidditch world cup match. Next to... Lucius Malfoy? The events of the day rushed back to Harry. He was in the Malfoy mansion, and still in Draco's body!

"Anna," Draco's mother- Narcissa, was it?-- asked, "are you quite alright? You look rather shocked."

"Anna?" Harry queried. "I thought my name was Draco. Isn't it?"

Narcissa sighed. "Oh dear, it's as I feared." She got up and yelled out the door. "LUCIUS! Come down here! Dracianna's having another identity crisis!"

Lucius Malfoy, his hair pristinely gelled into a large blondish chunk on his head, strode peevishly into the room. He walked over to Harry and glared down at him. "Yes, what is it, Draco? Whatever is wrong this time? They took you out of school, didn't they? Are you going insane, boy?"

"Oh, Lucius, don't call her Draco. You know it confuses her," Narcissa told him.

"Why do you keep calling me a she?" Harry said dazedly. "I'm not one."

"You see, Lucius? You see?" Narcissa cried, stamping her foot. "You see where this has gotten her? She doesn't even know who she is anymore! She should learn to accept herself as who she is, not have to bow to your chauvinistic ideals!"

Lucius ignored her and patted Harry on the head. "Good lad, Draco. Don't listen to your mother. You are a boy, or at least you will be, when you turn eighteen and that operation is legal. You don't need to worry about a thing."

"What do you mean I will be a boy?" asked Harry. "What operation? I'm not a girl! Am I?" He suddenly realized that something strange on his chest was being bound in by a bunch of extremely tight elastic. "Oh my god," Harry whispered. "I'm a girl. I'm a girl!" he rushed into the adjoining bathroom and slammed the door.

"Damn it, Narcissa!" Lucius bellowed.

"Don't blame me!" shrieked Narcissa. "It's your own fault! You gave another X chromosome!"

"Don't remind me," Lucius snarled.

In the bathroom, Harry had discovered that underneath the elastic he was wearing a lacy black bra, which was actually a rather large size and, surprisingly, fit well. "Bloody hell," he muttered, staring at himself in the mirror.

"Draco! Come out of that bathroom at once!"

"I'm a girl???"

"Stop shouting at the poor dear! Stop I say!"

"Draco's a girl???"

"Narcissa, dear, stay out of this!"

"YUCKY!!!"

Harry stared at himself/Draco/what-was-her-name."Damn, does Draco have big boobs."

"Dracianna," Narcissa's musical voice floated through the door and into the pink (pink?) bathroom where Harry/Draco stood in front of a large mirror. "Dear. Please come out. Your father is so sorry for frightening you."

"Narcissa, If you keep coddling the boy, he'll never turn out straight!"

"How could she? Always wondering if she were a boy or a girl?"

"Don't be disgusting! That's not what I meant!!!"

Draco had been a girl all this time? All the mean comments to him, Ron and Hermione were made by a girl? Boy, would Ron be in for a joke! Not that Harry was in any condition to tell Ron at this very moment. Especially since he had two lunatics who didn't agree on his gender, one of which would kill him if he knew who "Dracianna" really was, right outside his door.

"Oh dear," said Harry, feeling rather woozy from the tight bindings around his bra and the horrible shock of suddenly being a girl. "I believe I am going to faint." And he clutched the pink and fluffy roman pillar (What the bloody hell?) dizzily.

"NO YOU ARE NOT!!!" came Lucius's voice from outside the bathroom door "Come out right now, Draco! MANLY MEN DO NOT FAINT! Come out this instant, or I'll break down the door!"

"But I'm in my undies!" Harry cast around for his discarded clothing. Sad really: why do girls cover these things up? I wonder if Hermione... nah, Draco's much hotter. Oh my god, am I attracted to Draco? Harry jerked on some clothes just as the door to the pink bathroom opened with a bang.

* * *

A/N: Yes, yes, if we'd really wanted to set Harry and Draco up we could have done a slash. But we didn't, and that's not because we have anything against slashes or same-sex pairing, it's just because neither Harry nor Draco have ever shown any signs of being gay, and it's MUCH more fun to imagine Draco as a girl. So leave us alone!