Disclaimer: I do not own anything from this game, Kingdom Hearts isn't mine, I am just an enthusiast who enjoys it. Now, with the lawsuit copyright business over with, I am only going to make this appear in the first chapter in order to cut back on the redundancy.
"No, my queen, I did not paint the roses pink."
That was the only defense he could come up with, honestly who would, in their right mind, handle the Queen of Heart's roses with a paint brush and can? Certainly not the gardener who made his rounds to make sure they grew properly with just a touch. He did not have a care for anything but how it all survived. Though, secretly, he hated it.
"Lauriam, if you prove me wrong! I swear…OFF with your head!"
Those dreaded words, something he could not stand for or do, but with nothing to say against it, he bowed his head with respect and headed out into the maze that he knew backwards and forwards. Sighing, he could only think of one thing; why did it turn out this way? He could have grown up to be something, a little known fact, but Alice had favored the auburn young man when she was there. Though, it was never told to the courts, he had fancied her a little while ago, when he was young, only a few years short of ten or so. She had offered to take him with her into her home. Though the offer was out of kindness, all that Lauriam could say at the time was a silly little riddle. His parents were of the worst of the madness that drove it all, he was taught only one phrase, 'What is always there, but can be misused and then missed?' It had no meaning.
Now, the only things to keep him company were the shoddy flowers that were always painted odd colors by the guards. Imbecilic and useless were the decks, though it was never said. He could have left here several times and did not; the plains full of checkerboards and chess pieces were all in high prospect as of late, in current news. Though, the only way he heard it was the damned Cheshire Cat.
Such was his life, a dream, something other than it was. Looking over the hedges that were always neatly trimmed, he wondered if it would have been too odd to burn it all. Why, the thought occurred to him earlier that day and he muttered it under his breath after being summoned to prove his innocence. Though, it was then, he would deserve the chopping block, than always being threatened with it for no reason if he had carried it out. The Queen of Hearts had her bellows, but never were the beheadings carried out. The subjects of Wonderland always humored her, but these people, mad as they were, could not kill a soul. It was just as well, if something WERE to happen, like a ruckus with another child like that of Alice happened, heads would certainly roll.
He leaned on the hedge; it was the stop for just a small moment before he traveled onward. As he made himself comfortable with extra leaves that had grown, something odd had popped up and moved around him with the speed of ten griffons! What was it? There, stopping in front of him, was a gray thing, but it moved without any bones. His navy blue eyes blinked at it as the thing started to disturb the plants.
"No!" He yelled that out, seeing as it started to bend the plant life, which would cost him his job and jam! Grabbing a spade, Lauriam swung at the thing. It would not stay still to whack at it! What was this? A game that he had just become apart of randomly? Running after the odd boneless creature, he finally saw the mark it bared, an odd upside down something that looked a bit like a heart.
It darted between the hedges. NO! He could not let the queen see it! She would have his 'head' for it, if she could. Spade in tow, he kept running after the odd creature. Soon, it was cornered. Taking his footing like he would with hunting down the Door Mouse, he moved cautious and quieter than anything, even Cheshire, and swung the spade at the thing to find it not there.
"What is this?" Things in Wonderland were peculiar, he knew that, he has known that all his life, but this was beyond strange. Stepping into the small spot, he looked around and soon gasped. Several of the odd, bouncy, rag dollish monsters popped up. All of which, started to hit at him. Dodging, Lauriam jumped out of the way of one and swung, making it disappear. It was a game! It had to be. But, what sort of game would this be and why were there not any counters? Frowning, he kept swinging and got smacked and hit. These things hurt. No game of the queen's would hurt this much.
Backing up and dropping the spade, Lauriam ran for it, more of the odd creatures appearing in his wake. He became aware of some odd laughter, but he would not stop until he was almost home and a snap of fingers was heard. All the odd creatures disappeared. As the auburn man turned to where the sound was, something strange was standing in front of him and the gardener fell silent. There stood, in front of him, a red haired clown in black. Odd, no one he knew wore black; no one would be caught in the color without adornments and other parts of an outfit. Not even the Sora boy wore it when he came to visit. And this person was skin and bones! What was this? A walking corpse? A smile formed on the red haired clown's lips as he spoke. His voice had no emotion behind it.
"So, you're the new prospect? You don't look like much."
"What? I don't under-."
"Don't need to, Plant-man, just wanted to know what I was up against."
"Up against? What are you saying?"
The red headed person only laughed. This made Lauriam's eyebrows furrow. He did not seem like he was mad, no he seemed worse on borderline insane. "Who are you?!"
"Well well, getting angry, huh? The name's Axel." What a crazy name. 'Axel' that is the word for a buggy turner. The auburn haired man could do nothing but blink at the crazy red haired clown.
"You aren't supposed to be here without the Queen's permission." This red head just laughed, was it amusing to get on the royal family's bad side? It was hollow as ever.
"I don't think the queen will notice me." A smile only compared to the Cheshire Cat crossed his face. Devious. That is what this odd person was.
"Leave. I don't want to be the one getting in trouble today."
"Haven't you all ready? I thought it would be kind of interesting if you did again."
Lauriam's eyes narrowed, he really did not like this fellow. What would he do? Send more of his odd moving rag dolls out into the garden? A huff of an indignant gardener could be heard.
"You can do no such thing." He crossed his arms and glared profusely. Another laugh, chilling and hollow seemed to echo off the bushes.
"I've heard a mutter…it says, hmm what does it say? 'I wish I could burn this whole garden down, so help me, I will if I so chose.'" Lauriam's mouth gaped a little, how had this…this THING heard him? Outrage! Pointing his finger and stomping up to Axel, the gardener started a threat.
"If you start something I will not hold back from tying you up with vines and making you bait for the Jabberwocky!"
"…be careful what you wish for, Lauriam." Axel smiled and kissed the gardener's lips, stunning him long enough to disappear.
"Wait!" Was he just kissed by a man? It did not seem real. Stumbling back, he heard the laughter of Cheshire, looking up he saw that smile and then the face fade into view.
"Fickle, is it not? The way things flow too and fro."
"Cat, do grace me with your leaving, instead of your presence."
"Oh ho! Caught in the act of lewdicracy and soon the flowers will talk."
"They will not! Not if I have my way!"
"I heard, meow, that you kissed a man!"
"I did not!" Soon his hands started to swat at the floating cat head. If anything, he would be shunned for kissing something that was of the same gender, he knew it. Teacups and pig babies were fine, but still the thought of kissing the same gender was lewd.
"I-It didn't happen! I am not full of lewdicracy!" Another laugh and the cat was at his feet, rubbing his ankles. Lauriam was upset at this point and frowning, it was one thing to be tricked by someone else that was 'lewdicrous' but it was entirely another to be condemned of it.
"I know you aren't. You don't act it." Those navy blue eyes stared at the purple and pink tom cat. "Nor do you smell it." Though he always smelled like roses from working in the garden, there was a smile on the creature's face and Lauriam finally reached down to pet him and pick him up.
"Any news of Alice, Cat?" Gently did the man stroke the fur of the feline, making Cheshire purr.
"No…she's not returned from the adventure with the Sora boy." It was long ago, was it not that the odd boy with a huge key came traipsing through Wonderland? Sighing, he wondered if she was the same pretty girl. Time moved differently for different inhabitants of the world, Lauriam was affected by the evil trick of it moving faster. Whereas the Mad Hatter, Time had affected him by making it time for tea for eternity, they never grew older. Wacky was it all. His heart was yearning to see her smile again.
Taking the overly big feline into his home, still stroking his fur, he looked at the yellow eyes of Cheshire.
"Do you know what this 'Axel' thing that kissed me is? He isn't from here."
"Axel-thing, Axel-thing, hmmm…he could be half there, with something missing." Blinking, Lauriam thought about that. Half there? Something missing? Surely this cat always spoke in paradoxes, but he always got what the feline tried to say, this one instance, however, was not the same.
"Cheshire, elaborate and I will give you food." The cat could not ignore that bribe for the information he had.
"Heartless is what it is called when a dark thing eats a heart, but a nothing, a not somebody, is what that clown is."
"A nothing? Odd, he looked like a something…he talked like a something, and he kisses…" An angry blush hit his face. "No, I won't think on it. How dare something spread their lewdness on me!" Cheshire just laughed a little. It seemed to Lauriam, the cat was enjoying his torment. Though, as promised, he did feed the purple beast. It was left over jam and bread from the breakfast he had. He watched the animal eat the rest of it and then looked outside.
"Could the flowers really be whispering about that?"
"Oh truly! They are! They consider you the first weed to be handsome." That made the gardener chuckle. Amidst that, a scowl soon appeared on his face. It was a bit disappointing that now, amongst the green, his name is sullied.
"Any way I could fix it?"
Cheshire thought and thought, he could see it in his eyes. "…no." Eugh. Hiding his head in his hands, Lauriam was now condemned to odd looks, more than usual. What a day to start out with, what a time to find trouble. Perhaps the moon was full again, that would explain it right? Peculiar things happened on the days of the full moon. It still made him wonder how this Axel clown knew his thoughts and what he said earlier in the morning out of anger. A thought grinded his gears to a halt. He was being spied on! In a panic, the man started to close all the windows and locked the door. Of course, if something could disappear, it would not appear behind a locked door, right? It was rude to not be invited. That was his clear thought as he looked at Cheshire.
"I think I shall stay inside today." The cat nodded and soon took his leave.
Side Notes and Author's Ending thoughts: So, what did everyone think? I tried to make it as close as possible, a few brief tidbits to add. I am adding details and little tidbits from the books of Alice and Wonderland and Through the Looking Glass because I thought it would play out better than just the Disney movie. And, I would like to add, the Wonderland people love to make up words and phrases, so I am adding to the dictionary just one in this chapter. (I may or may not include more as time goes by).
1. Lewdicracy: (verb): the act of being lewd and caught in the moment of the action.
Related forms-
Lewdicrous, (adjective)
Lewdness, (noun)