Disclaimer: I've always kind of pondered as to why a disclaimer was necessary on a site specifically called "fanfiction. net." As the title suggests, it's a website for fanfiction. Not original stories. So why is a disclaimer needed when the site name already tells the reader that the work of fiction isn't completely original?
A/N: This is a story that was sparked by a single line that I wrote in chapter 4 of my Final Fantasy VII fanfiction "Suzanne." In the chapter, Cid is listening to Suzanne as she tells him that she agreed to go drinking with Reno. Cid tells her to be careful with the warning "you know how you are when you're drunk…" She replies with "Shaddup! You look really young when you're blurry!" So then I started to wonder… What exactly happened? And this came to mind…
P.S. Lemon-ish warning. I haven't written erotic stuff in a while, so hopefully it doesn't suck too much. Enjoy!
I Trust You
"After I'd gone through a few cigs, she woke up. At first, I was kind of scared, but she was really out of it, so I got by okay…"
"Since you're here and she's not, can you hand me that wrench?"
The scarlet haired Turk pointed to the metal tool next to him. "This one?"
"The bigger one." Reno lifted the wrench Cid had asked for and handed it to him under the plane. "Gotta say… You're a better assistant than the girl…"
"Yeah, well… It's been my job to follow orders without questioning 'em for years. So like I was saying… She sorta fell out of bed and went to the shower, and when she got out, she told me to leave! What the fuck, I was just as drunk as her! Well… Maybe a little less drunk, but still!"
"She's just mad 'cause she never wanted to go through that again. It's one of the reasons she quit drinkin' in the first place."
"Wait a minute… what do you mean 'again'?"
Cid snorted and clambered out from under his plane. He rubbed the grease off of his face and smirked, crossing his arms. "What, you think you were the first person she drunkenly tried to fuck?" Reno frowned. "You ain't that special, dumbass. The only difference between now and then is that she didn't have any of daddy's friends watchin' out for her in the bar." He spat out the smoked down butt and replaced it with a fresh cigarette. "If you'd been here three or four years ago, you wouldn't have made it out the door, much less her house, or the hotel or wherever the hell you went."
"I was still the one to… to… unvirginize her."
Cid looked at him through coy eyes as he lit his new cancer-stick. "At least you're a better age for her…"
"Huh?"
Cid laughed a gravelly laugh and scratched his head. "I don't know… Don't worry about it though, you're a Turk. You're supposed to not give a damn about anything…" Cid didn't hear what Reno said next. He was lost in a memory that still remained surprisingly vivid, considering he had tried his damnedest to forget it. Sometimes situations just seemed to bring up the worst kinds of recollections to the surface. This was one of those times.
Cid closed his eyes momentarily, and when he opened them, he was in his living room, three years in the past, smoking down a pack of Malboros. Pissed at Shera, pissed at himself, and pissed at anything else he could think of that might have in some way been related to her leaving, telling him that "she'd be back in a week or so." He hated that smile she always gave him when she left because of something he'd done. It was like she didn't care. Not really. He knew deep down that she cared about him and wanted nothing more than to be there for him, but every time she smiled that smile, suitcase in hand, it was like a stab in the gut. The phone rang.
Grudgingly, he answered, blowing out a puff of smoke as he muttered "Hello?"
"Cid? I need a favor." It was Sean, a longtime buddy of his. Sean always seemed to be able to help him when he needed it whether it be for advice, a tool or part he needed, or just a round of drinks. In short, he was the kind of friend who he was basically obligated to do favors for, as pissed off or depressed as he might be.
"Yeah, whaddya want?"
"I was going to make sure Suzanne stayed out of trouble at the bar tonight, but Junior's sick, and Janelle is off somewhere with Shera. Are you two alright?"
Cid didn't even acknowledge the question with an answer. He kind of pitied the poor guy. He had an amazing wife, a good job, but he was stuck raising a sickly kid and the town delinquent. "Why don't you call one of the other guys to do it?"
"Because I trust you the most. Now please? She's already climbed out her window."
Cid didn't want to do it. In his current mental state, he would have never wanted to do it. But those four words… because I trust you… those words convinced him. After that, he wasn't going to be able to just say 'no' so easily. "Alright, pal. I was thinking about gettin' some drinks anyway."
"Thanks Cid. Look… patch things up with Shera, alright?" Before he had time to respond, Sean had hung up the phone. Cid set the cordless on the table, leaned back in his chair, and sighed. He really… really didn't want to go… but he knew all about Suzanne's drinking habits… She wasn't in any way a lightweight, but when she really did get plastered… well… someone had to be there to make sure she didn't do anything she was going to wake up regretting the next morning. Finally, Cid stood up and walked out into the tepid night air.
It wasn't a long walk to get to the bar, and when he walked in, his eyes turned to the counter. "Bourbon, Sam. Put it on my tab." Once he had his drink in hand, he went to sit at a table in the back corner. It was hard to overlook Suzanne. Not only was the seventeen-year-old the youngest in the bar, but she was also the only girl. And she was loud. Her well-kept brunette hair was neatly trimmed to a length that fell just past her shoulders, and she wore clothes that showed off her body perfectly. Every chance she got, she would lean forward, showing off her cleavage to the flock of guys around her, or she would bend down to pick something up, black lacy underthings peaking out. Cid shook his head. This was exactly why someone was always there to watch out for her. Because where she thought she was being cool and sexy, she was being stupid, taking risks that didn't need to be taken.
The hours wore on as she and Cid both slowly got drunker and drunker. But while Cid had maintained the same position in the corner, nursing drinks, getting more agitated the more he drank, Suzanne had begun flitting from guy to guy, growing more flirtatious and less aware of who she was talking to with every gulp of her beloved liqueur. Eventually, she was sitting in a bar stool backwards, facing a small crowd of the men whose drunken hearts she had gathered throughout the night.
"C'mon, so who'll it be?"
"Yeah, you have to choose someone!"
"Pick me, I look better than all these other assholes…"
Suzanne raised a finger to her lips, or rather… she tried, missed the first few times, and finally got it situated to help her look more like she was thinking hard. "Hmmm…" She gripped the counter to keep her composure as she stood up. It wouldn't have done much for her image if she fell on her face. She raised up her hands. "Sohrry boys, but I already made my dicision…" She parted the crowd and pointed. "You! Mr. Mysterioso in the cornarr." This was usually the point where whoever was appointed to watch her would stand up, take her hand, and lead her home.
Hearing his cue, Cid looked up and saw Suzanne's deep blue eyes piercing into his own. She strutted over to him and placed an arm around his neck as she practically fell into his lap, beginning to trace a finger along his jaw line. "Wat's yor name, stranger?"
Though drunk, Cid still basically remembered his responsibility to Sean. He figured if he just played along a while, he could get her outside and into her house. "Cid."
"I know a Cid… He's kinda famous 'round here… But yorr much cuter…" She ran her fingers through his short blond hair as she whispered the last part to him.
He wasn't sure if it was the alcohol, or if it was her, but at that moment in time, she was quite the charmer. (It was the alcohol, he realized later.) "Is that so?"
"Yeah. C'mon. Let's go. I need to talk to yoo…" With that said, she slipped off of his lap, taking his callused hands in her own polished dainty ones, and began to the back door of the bar. Sam watched them go, a bewildered yet amused look on his face. Once the door closed, he shook his head and continued cleaning glasses.
The alley behind the bar was dark with puddles all around that the sun never touched. She stumbled through a few of such puddles, still gripping his hands tightly until she had touched the brick wall opposite the bar. Cid, being drunk himself, didn't stop in time before crashing into her. But it seemed that that was exactly what she wanted as her arms suddenly wrapped around him, pulling him close for a long kiss. As Cid pulled away, she craned her neck forward, trying to keep her lips against his, but only succeeding in licking his lower lip a little. Cid's hammered thought process went something like this: This ain't right, I'm twice her age… But she is lookin' pretty damn good right now. I bet I wouldn't be so angry right now if I fucked somethin'. You know? I bet Sean won't be as mad if she sleeps with me instead of some stranger. I think this is okay.
With that train of thought finished, he wrapped his muscled arms around her and kissed her hard, not bothering to try rethinking things with a sober viewpoint. She giggled a little in the brief moments that their mouths separated, and he chuckled when they took a full moment to be apart. Now it was his turn to lead her somewhere else. He kept one arm firmly around her waist, plastering her hip against his as he lead her out of the alley and down the street towards his front door. She kissed whatever she could reach from her current position, his cheek, his neck, his hair, while he dug around in his pocket for his keys. He pulled them out with a victorious "HA!" and slid the single key into the keyhole, turning it, waiting for the 'click' to swing the door open, drag her in, and ravage her like a starved animal.
Click!
There it was. The sound he had been waiting for. In one swift, forceful movement, he tore the door open, swept her inside, and slammed it shut behind him. This was it. They were in his house alone together, craving the body of the other. There was only a short moment before their bodies were entwined again, her legs taking a small leap to rest on his hips.
Two clunks told him that she'd kicks off her shoes, so he followed suit, working his boots off of his own large feet. As he stumbled to the bedroom, vaguely keeping track of where he was going, she licked and sucked at his neck. Likewise hungering for a taste, he found himself kissing and biting her shoulder, collarbone and any other spot of skin his lips happened to touch. He held her ass firmly with one hand as he felt around for the entrance of his room with his other. It wasn't until he fell through the open door that he realized it wasn't a good idea to be leaning all his weight against the wall as he walked. "Fuck…" He uttered the word as she stumbled off of him. After he had gotten back to his feet, he stood for only a moment before being pushed down backwards onto his bed. Cid propped himself up on his elbows and watched Suzanne as she giggled and slid her shirt over her head. Her hair was mussed, but she didn't seem to notice. She looked damn sexy with the animalistic tangled hair, flushed face, and black lacy bra.
"Someone looks pretty happy…" A light titter floated through his ears as she scratched her head and looked down towards his crotch region, his erection now obvious. He grinned, letting out a puff of smoke while starting to remove his own articles of clothing. Just as he reached for his belt, Suzanne crawled onto him. "Lemme do that…" Her skirt was now gone too, revealing her matching panties, soaked with anticipation. He wanted to fuck her. He wanted to fuck her hard, and all she was doing was dawdling, taking her time unbuckling his damn belt and unzipping his damn pants.
"Fuck this…" He threw off his ever-present goggles, sat up and pushed her to the side. He wasn't in the mood to play and tease. He needed to be inside of something, and she seemed to want it plenty. After what felt like an hour of yanking and tugging at his pants, he threw them to the side, pulling her back to his strong torso. He rolled on top of her and ran his hands all over her smooth, perfect skin, all the while, exploring the new mouth with his tongue. He could feel her fingers tracing around the muscles on his hardened chest. He shuddered to her touch and she let out a soft moan into their kiss. She was so hot. So young for him, but so indescribably attractive. He let his hand drift down, settling on her thigh, under the elastic of her panties. It only stayed there briefly before he pulled his lips away from hers to focus on removing them. She smiled a stupid smile and squirmed around, helping him pull them off. As he finally slipped them past her ankles and over her feet, she undid the clasp to her bra, letting it slide down her bare arms into her hands. Cid looked up from his accomplished task only to have a black lacy undergarment thrown in his face. She giggled. He chuckled and threw it to the side. His uncovered eyes looked over the perfect naked body of the girl… no… the woman before him. He was taken with her.
He had to touch her again.
He leaned back towards her, more slowly this time than before, almost afraid that she would shatter if he so much brushed his fingertips against her porcelain skin, like she was some delicate treasure. Could it all have been a dream? Having such a perfect form right in front of him desiring nothing more than to have him inside of her? As his hands wrapped around her full breasts, he sighed. The touch of her warm skin was enough to reassure him. He looked in her eyes, his vision blurred through the heat, passion and alcohol lingering in the air around him. He saw comfort, affection, even love. It was temporary. It would never be anything more than that, but in that moment, he loved her for it. She blinked, her eyes shimmering in the dark as if asking "what are you waiting for?" What was he waiting for? He snapped out of his momentary trance and turned away, working his boxers down his legs. He would be a fool to not take her right then and there. He dropped his boxers to the floor and turned to her. His lust was renewed, and he wasn't planning on wasting any more time admiring her or dreaming impossible dreams of her maintaining her feelings for him through the next morning. Tonight, she was his, and tonight, he was going to keep her. His mouth crashed back against her lips, his tongue once again tangling with hers, his prominent erection pressed against her womanhood, ready to penetrate deep inside her like they both wanted so much.
"Because I trust you."
The words came against his wishes. He didn't want to hear them again. Cid pulled her body tight against his, feeling her breasts pressed up against his sweaty chest. His every ounce told him to shove himself inside of her now, yet the words kept echoing inside, louder with every kiss. "Because I trust you." She wrapped her legs around him as if shouting 'do it already!' "Because I trust you. Because I trust you. I TRUST YOU."
He stopped and stared at her for a long time, an internal battle between the mind and the manhood going on behind his eyes. He uttered a curse and struggling out of her grip. In silence, he got off the bed, rummaging around for his boxers and cigarettes. She looked at him, annoyed. "What's th'holdup?" He pulled up his underwear, cancer-stick in his mouth, and went back to searching for matches.
"Go t'sleep, kid." The room glowed softly, illuminated by the single match. He drew it close to his cigarette, turning briefly to see a scowl on her- Sean's daughter's face. He looked away quickly, lighting up, taking the deepest drag of his life before letting it all puff out of him in a cloud. He shook the match out. "Don't gimme that face." Bravely, he turned to look at her again. "Now lay down. And go t'sleep." He said the words in a commanding sober-as-possible tone. She pouted briefly and lay down, letting out an exasperated, sex-free groan. He eyed her for a moment, fire still burning in his pale blue hues, teeth chewing silently on the filter. 'Maybe I can kiss her just one more time…' He stopped after only a step, knowing that if he allowed himself to do such a thing, he would have lost the fight. His heart seized up in his chest. It hurt to let her go, but it was the best thing for the both of them. After a quiet utterance of the word "fuck", he staggered out the room and towards the bathroom. 'It's going to be a long night…'
The next morning, he waited for her on the couch, still in his boxers, still smoking, now with a cup of coffee and bloodshot eyes. He remembered the whole thing. He had been drunk, but not drunk enough to forget what had happened. The rustle of cloth snapped his eyes away from his coffee and to his bedroom door. Shortly after, Suzanne walked out looking extremely disheveled, the bed sheet wrapped around her, cloaking her body. For a moment, she looked confused, probably not entirely sure of her surroundings, but when her eyes fell on Cid, a sudden realization along with some vague memories spread through her mind, showing blatantly through her eyes. Her mouth, which Cid was ashamed to say he was a little too familiar with, hung wide open. She seemed to be struggling to find something to say, but all she could come up with was "Where are my clothes?" She stammered the words with her eyes suddenly to the floor, a crimson blush spread across her face.
"Right where you left them. Next to the bed." With that answer said, she rushed back into his room, closing the door behind her. Cid looked up at the ceiling with weary, tired eyes, blowing out another puff of smoke as he waited. After several minutes, Suzanne walked back out, clad in her things from the night before. But now she looked so small, scared, embarrassed, all of the charisma she had had the night before at the bar was gone. Cid felt a knot forming in his stomach. 'What the fuck was I thinking…?' The answer was already obvious in his mind. He wasn't thinking. Her wide eyes looked searchingly into his as once again, she opened and closed her mouth, trying and failing to find the words. He chose to answer her unspoken question. "I didn't touch you…" This seemed to allow her a small amount of relief. "…much." She tensed up slightly at the word. It was a lie, and he knew it. He did touch her. A hell of a lot more than was okay by any standards. But he wasn't about to tell her that. He stood, walking past her to get his own clothes. As he dressed, he looked around the bedroom a little. If he didn't know any better, he would have thought that much more than just fondling had taken place the night before. Not only was the bed in the worst condition he had ever seen, but there was also the distinct scent of sex lingering in the air. He held his breath.
When he left the room, he saw her sitting on the couch, a lost and thoughtful expression on her face. "Here." Cid's words snapped her back to reality. "Wear this." He handed her his flight jacket, worn down from constant use.
"Why? It wasn't cold outside last night…"
"To hide this." He motioned to her shoulders, and she craned her neck to look. There were little red marks all over both sides. "There's more on your neck too…" She looked completely mortified, like she was about to cry. "Your dad called earlier." Her eyes widened again and darted up to look at him.
"What did he say? What did you tell him?"
Cid sat silently for a moment. "I told him that you wouldn't go home, so you stayed the night here." She let out a sigh and closed her eyes. "I told him… that you were fine." Her eyes cracked open and she bit her lip. "Now come on." Cid stood. "I'll walk you home." Suzanne shakily got to her feet and slipped her arms through his jacket, making her look smaller than ever.
"Don't you need to work on the rocket?" He shook his head.
"Not until I know you're okay." They found their shoes by the door and put them on in silence. The quiet continued most of the way back to her house. Cid was careful to maintain a distance between the two of them, as wobbly and likely to fall down as she was in those heels. She stumbled a few times, but was sure to catch herself, so not to trouble him. Eventually, Cid broke the silence.
"Are you okay?"
She nodded slowly. "I'll be fine. I'm not going to go to the bar for a while, that's for sure." She halfheartedly chuckled. He watched her out of the corner of his eye.
"Why do you do it to yourself?" Suzanne stopped in her tracks, leaning against a nearby fence, quiet for a time.
"They ignore me." Cid didn't have to ask who 'they' were. He could guess.
"Your folks?" She nodded gravely. "You've gotta go easy on 'em, kiddo. Your brother's sick, and they've got their hands full. Drawing a bunch of negative attention to yourself is only making it harder for them." She remained silent for a moment.
"Negative attention is better than none at all." He halted. There wasn't much arguing with that, but being the elder, he knew he had to say something reassuring.
"If you want attention, then do your best to start helping out." She looked up at him, surprised at his sudden commanding air. "Study harder, help cooking when your mom's busy, do whatever favors they ask you to do." He stepped closer, putting a hand on her shoulder, touching her for the first time that day. "If they just look, even for a second, they'll have no choice but to stare. And they'll show you the love they've always felt for their daughter." She smiled. Really smiled. He couldn't remember ever seeing her so genuinely happy. (Nor could he remember ever being so eloquent)
"Thanks, Cid."
"No problem, kid." She blushed.
"Don't call me that, I'm not a kid, you know, you geezer." He frowned.
"I'm not that old, and I'll call you whatever the hell I damn please." The rest of the walk, they walked as friends, not as a kid with dad's friend, not awkward acquaintances, but just a guy and a girl, having a casual conversation.
When they reached her door, she turned, still smiling, a blush creeping onto her face. "Cid… if I hadn't been drunk… and if I was a bit older…" She trailed off and laughed a little, waving her hand as if to brush the words away. "Never mind. Just…" There was a momentary pause, and she leaned forward, pecking him on the cheek. "Thanks." With a grin, she turned, walking through her door.
Cid stared after her, even after the door had slammed and there was only hard wood in front of him. He touched his cheek briefly before scratching his head and turning around. "Damn kid… Keeping me from my work…" And then he left, heading towards the rocket, trying to think of how to apologize to Shera for whatever he'd said to her the morning before as he went.
A blink, and Cid was leaned up against the Tiny Bronco, watching the smoke from his cigarette trail up to the sky.
Reno leaned forward, eyeing him slyly. "Are you even listening?" Cid sighed, grabbing several tools, muttering a 'yeah yeah…' as he crawled back under his plane. After the young Turk has triumphantly asked "HA! Then what did I say, eh Geezer? You don't have an answer, do you?" He went back to work, muting out the redhead's voice.