Disclaimer ; I don't own Naruto.

Chapter 1 ; Neji and Kakashi

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It had been a normal day, the sun shining brightly down on Konoha as Sasuke took his usual after training jog A.k.a legging it from his fan girls for his virginity.

But today was different, they had cornered him.

As things looked there dimmest Sasuke suddenly had a stroke of genius and quickly shouted "Sorry girls, I'm gay !"

There expressions depicted shock horror, to Sasuke it was beautiful, he actually smiled, do bear in mind this was the evil villain smile Orochimaru thought him.

"Prove it !" and in one moment that smart bitch Sakura ruined his happiness. Then he noticed something across the street, I must have been destiny.

Across the street Neji Hyuga was standing hunched over a table threatening Tenten as she had spread another rumour about him being gay. Then he got a weird feeling in the back of his mind, the one that said that destiny was about to rape him something awful.

SMACK

And then Neji's ass felt very sore.

As Neji turned he got the shock of his life to see Sasuke Uchiha, with his hand still on the Hyuga's backside.

Then Sasuke took it a step further, he give the Hyuga's ass a squeeze, winked and practically purred the word "Nice." Before walking off.

As Sasuke made his exit he could barely keep his Laughter contained, and when Tenten announced that the Hyuga was now visibly hard, well Sasuke had to bite through his lip to keep from laughing evilly, damn Orochimaru.

-

Three days later and the Fan girls were still following him, they didn't believe him, well then it was time to get serious.

This consisted of shouting at Kiba in a crowded street, accompanied with hand gestures.

"Want a doggy threat !"

And dragging Rock Lee into a closet and challenging him to a moaning contest.

But it wasn't working, he was going to need professional help.

-

Kakashi noticed it as soon as he entered his apartment that night, there was Sasuke standing by the window reading Ichi Ichi yaoi, he'd gotten it and pretended to read it around Gai so he'd remember to knock before coming into his Apartment.

"Sasuke, do you usually read porn with the Sharingan ?" as he got closer he'd noticed that Sasuke's Sharingan was active, and that Ino and Sakura were spying in the window.

"Only when I'm memorising the techniques." You know. that wasn't a bad idea.

"Any reason your here, apart from looking at porn, Sasuke ?" asked Kakashi teasingly.

Sasuke beckoned the copy nin to him, and into the girls line of few, grabbed him and pulled him close, whispering into his ear.

"By tomorrow everyone will think I fucked your brains out !" giving off a pretty blush for the girls, pushed him onto the bed and closed the curtains.

Then he cast a very special Jutsu that Orochimaru had taught him, he had thought he'd never need it.

"What did you do ?" Asked Kakashi, fearing the answer.

"Get up !" as he tried standing straight he instantly felt pain and fell into a very suggestive limp.

"Fuck !" Kakashi breathed amazed at what had happened.

"I'm staying the night !" said Sasuke, watching Kakashi try to stop limping.

-

It was when he was walking home that morning he saw her, the most beautiful woman he'd ever seen.

And he had spanked her cousin 4 days ago.

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Okay, who wants a second chapter. If ya do you'd better review.

R&R