D.K: Ok people, I feel bad for hardly updating, so here's a "crack chapter." Everything here will be mistake and error ridden and probably won't make sense. Enjoy.
Azmaria sighed, they were at it again.
"…you know it's not fair, Rosette! You're always dumping the laundry duty on me!" The little devil had had it with the young sisters' lazy ways, "you need to start doing your own chores!"
"Don't yell at me like I'm the only one at fault!" shouted the sister, her hands on her hips as she leaned forward, bent at the hips, "you bring upon yourself by doing it with no one asking you to."
"That's not true at all! You always throw your clothes at me and walk away!"
"Do not!"
"Do too!"
Nervously, Azmaria stepped between then and cleared her throat, "choir practice is done for the day, I could wash the clothes."
Chrno's eyes softened at the sight of the little lavender haired apostle, "thank you Az, but Rosette needs to take care of her own responsibilities."
With a slight twitch in her right eye, the aforementioned blond nun grabbed hold of the fore mentioned devils' ear, "what did you say about me having to take care of my own responsibilities?" There was an audible gulp, "far as I'm concerned, I do my share of the chores around here, more so even!"
"You wouldn't have to if you'd stop destroying the Order's car and every building you go into!"
"That's it! You're going down Chrno!" An angry blush colored the nuns cheeks as her right hook plowed into the little devils cheek.
Flying backwards, Chrno performed a perfect back flip, landing on his feet, "what was that for?" he cried, sounding incredulous.
"That was for using my mistakes against me!" She growled, charging at him.
Sweat drop forming on the back of his head, the violet haired devil ran, "it's not like I'm trying to be mean!" cried the poor devil, "you just need to be a little more mature on missions!"
"I'll show you matu--" so blinded by her anger, the young nun never knew what hit her, didn't even see the Elder walk somewhere in the distance between her and Chrno, only to stick out his foot to trip her.
Said nun unfortunately bit her tongue as she skidded across the grass, her skirt flying over her head.
"Ah, such a wonderful view." cooed the Elder, whistling a light tune.
Chrno's face turned crimson as he ran back to his contractor and pulled her skirt back over her bottom, "E-Elder! How could you do that to her?! Why are you even out here, don't you have some experiment to work on?"
The crazy old man blinked, "wasn't it you who requested my assistance anyways?" Elder looked from the crimson devil to little Azmaria, who stood on the sidelines, her hands folded innocently in front of her, a mischievous smile on her face. "Ah, I see."
Finally sitting up, Rosette looked over her shoulder and glared, "what the hell was that for?!"
Elder merely laughed, "well, I thought when Az came to get me I would be helping him," he began, motion to Chrno, "but apparently I was helping Az and myself." An angry growl filled the air as Rosette jumped to her feet, zooming towards a laughing Elder.
"You stupid lech! I'm going to kill you!" With tears running down his cheeks, the Elder ran for his life, lest the powerful fists of the young nun were to connect with his delicate and old face.
Behind them, Chrno was motionless, still kneeling on the ground, his eyes wide and blinking at the same time, "what just happened?" he questioned out loud.
There was a small giggle at his side, "Elder just saved you from getting pummeled."
Glancing over at Azmaria, the small devil gave her a worried gaze, "I don't know who's had more influence over you, Rosette or the Elder."
The young apostle merely giggled into her hands, "how can I live here and not be affected by Rosette?" Her expression was fond, "I want to be just like her when I'm older."
"You do know you are trying to emulate the master of destruction, right?" There was a blank look on Chrno's face, he didn't understand it, why would she want to destroy everything around her? "Then again," Chrno thought aloud to himself, "why is it that quality about her that attracts me so damn much?"
Az bit her lip, trying to hold in her laughter. The confusion and horror crossing the small devils face was just priceless. Plus, when do you ever hear one of the most feared devils talking to himself?
"That's it, I must be crazy! Ugh, I should have known this would happen."
Seemingly from nowhere, Carmen tackle Chrno to the ground, "wha-cha yellin' at yourself for Chrnnnnoooo?" She asked in a sing song voice.
Losing his balance, Chrno fell to the ground, "Carmen, try not to kill the poor guy."
"Wait, how is it that you two are here? Aren't you supposed to be in the watch?" Chrno nodded at Azmaria's logic.
"Well, this is one of those times where the author just wants to screw around a bit, so instead of being where we're supposed to be, we're here, making your life all that much harder!" Vincent said with a laugh, slapping Chrno on the back.
"Wait… what? Author? What are you talking about!?" Cried the poor devil, confused beyond belief.
"Oh come on, you know! The crazy chick we always talk to before chapters, except in this one, we're allowed to openly talk to her and well, we 'realize' that we are just anime characters and our lives really don't matter." Input Carmen, smiling like what she said was the most puke worthy gush of optimistic speech.
Azmaria crouched in the corner, "that is such a depressing thought… my life doesn't even matter…" despair lines overtook the area of the young girl.
"What the hell are despair lines?" Carmen yells, shaking her fist at the crazy author.
You know, those blue line things that appear whenever an anime character sulks in a corner. Booms the author's voice from the sky.
Chrno shook his head, getting himself up from the floor, "ok, I don't get it, how did this go from 'normal' fanfic mode to completely and absolutely making no sense?"
Simple, I am your master, you obey me… at least in this world, otherwise, I don't own you.
"So you can't tell us what to do?" asked the devil hopefully.
You're in my world, so yes, yes I can.
At this time Rosette decides to make her entrance, "stupid lech, needs to be taught more than one lesson…"
Ah, finally! My favorite person is here!
"Who the hell just spoke?" questioned the nun, looking around suspiciously, "and who keeps describing everything!?"
Well don't I feel loved, how can you forget the author who is making you do all this crap? I mean, I could have made you and Chrno make out.
Rosette's blue orbs shifted from left to right, "w-why would you want to do that?"
Well, I love the Chrno Rosette pairing, and I am a hopeless romantic… so, why not?
"So what, we're just going to drop to the ground and start making out?" Chrno asked, his heart beating wildly at the thought.
"God Chrno, keep it in your pants!" Cried a blushing Rosette.
Chrno's face lit at her words, "ahaha, Chrno got told!" Carmen laughed loudly.
"Carmen, we don't need your input." Vincent said, dragging her away by her hair.
"Nooooo!!! The world needs my inpuuuuuuuut!" With that, Carmen and Vincent left the area.
"Ok, this is becoming too weird, even for a crack fic, can we just get this over with?" Rosette questioned, irritated, "stop describing how I'm feeling! It's getting on my nerves!"
Walking forward looking childish and innocent, Azmaria looks to the sky, "please, Ms. D., can we finish this chapter so you can get some sleep?"
Ugh, fine… stupid character ruining my sleep deprived fun… I have to stop annoying my room mate, ShadowTrunks1128 anyways… yes, another author on here is my room mate, fun, huh?
The author finally gets back in to fanfic mode… somewhat.
Sighing, Chrno gazed up at Rosette from his sitting position on the ground. Azmaria had walked back into the order, giving the excuse that she had a few chores to get done, while Rosette stood in front of the devil.
Hey, you're making it sound like I'm a bad room mate!
Oh you know I don't mean it that way.
"D.!" Chrno yelled, "we're trying to have a moment here!"
Oh, sorry.
Rosette sighed and plopped down on the ground, a brow raising in suspicion towards the sky before she sighs, "look, I'm sorry Chrno, I know most of what you said is pretty much true."
A small smile of gratitude lit Chrno's features, "no, it was wrong of me to use that against you, I mean, even if you do destroy stuff, you don't do it intentionally, and it's always to try and help someone."
The author is behind the keyboard, squeeing at the cute moment while her room mate goes 'awww,' then states, 'you're annoying the hell outta me… good night.'
While the author and her room mate are arguing about using what the other says against them in the crack chapters, Rosette and Chrno scoot closer to one another.
Leaning against her arm, Chrno lays his head on Rosette's shoulder while she lays her head on his, both gazing at the stars.
"Some things in life just don't make sense, do they Chrno." She stated.
"Yeah, I'm beginning to think I really don't know anything."
"I have the same feeling," she paused and shivered, "I also have the feeling I'm being watched."
You are.
A low growl shuts the author right up.
"So what's going to happen next?" Rosette questions, worry lacing her voice.
"I believe that there will be changes starting with your body from the astral energy."
"Seriously? That's going to be happening within the next month or so? How fair is that? Didn't Carmen and Vincent just go into the watch?"
"Technically that was months ago, so if anything, D.K. has given you plenty of time."
"I'm just not sure if I'm ready for this."
"You don't have to worry Rosette, I'll be here for you every step of the way."
With a small yet warm smile on her lips, Rosette slips into a blissful sleep, Chrno dozing off moments later.