In Paridisum

Rated: M (to be safe) for sexual content, language and adult content

Summary: Can love really overcome your other feelings? Can it triumph over hatred, over the lust for dominance and victory? Once he sets his mind and heart to something, can Light Yagami really change his vow? Will he change his heart in time or will he lose everything?

Silent Dagger: This is my first Death Note fanfiction and also my first yaoi. I accept valid criticism, but please do not flame me for unnecessary things (such as complaints about yaoi, you already know it is a male/male pairing so if you do not like that, feel free to read another story).

Chapter One: Resurrection

Those eyes…coal black and soulless, to me that it how I see them. An empty shell, but that is not truly correct now is it? You are not an empty shell. Behind this ridiculous look is the mind of a genius, my enemy, my one worthy opponent. I assure you; your time is running out, my 'friend'…

Light Yagami smiled darkly to himself. His memories were restored, he was whole again. The past had caught up to him in a flash. He was Kira, he was the new God of the world, or he was going to be very soon. The man sitting next to him had his attention elsewhere, on the scene taking place outside of the helicopter that they were both sitting in.

Higuchi was being led towards them. 'Kira' had been caught. Light wondered if L felt any pride in seeing him defeated. After all, all evidence showed that Higuchi was definitely Kira. L had caught his killer. The smile could not be kept off his face. A light smirk in the darkness of the night. If only he knew…

Well, he was hoping to see some surprise in that face once Higuchi dropped dead. 30 seconds…that was all the life he had left. Light turned his attention away from L and watched Higuchi being brought closer. 20 seconds…

10…9…8…7…6…5…4…3…2…1…sayonara, Higuchi Kyosuke.

Higuchi stopped; he threw his head back and yelled a rasping, choked yell. His heart was failing him. Light had to fight back a laugh as L leaned forward, those round eyes of his opening even wider. Just as he predicated, the man was surprised. It made him feel even better than before. Still, there was no need to throw the game after all this. He leaned forward as well, opening his eyes to their widest.

"W-What just happened?" he demanded to no one. "What happened to Higuchi?!"

He saw his father leaning over Higuchi, as if he could do anything. The man was dead. Still, Light was actually having fun acting as if he too were ignorant. "Father! If Higuchi dies now!" he shouted, knowing that everyone present would know exactly what that meant. No more Kira, no one to blame, and yet here people were still dying.

He chanced a glance at L. The great detective looked stumped. How wonderful, he truly was going to win. With Higuchi gone…it was L's turn next. He grinned into the darkness. Everything was going according to his plan.

Light was standing in the main room of the investigation headquarters with the others from the team. On the monitor was Misa, reading, minding her own business but still being watched closely…by one man, L. The others were still in awe of Rem, but Light could not blame them. It wasn't every day you saw a Death God. They were also pouring over the Death Note and Light was thrilled at the way they reacted to the rules in the back of the notebook. The fake rules he had Ryuk write before relinquishing his hold on the Death Note.

That would be sure to clear his name and Misa's as well. He honestly cared nothing for the girl, but he would rather not have Rem breathing down his neck. If he had to protect the girl for now, then so be it. Rem would be out of his way soon enough. Finally, after much murmuring and quick conversations, Matsuda looked up to address everyone.

"Well, there is one good thing out of all of this," he began. "If the person who writes down a name in this book has to keep writing every 13 days…well then, Light-kun and Misa-Misa are cleared."

Light looked at him and smiled. Good old Matsuda, moving his plans along nicely. Once he was free of L he could do as he pleased again. He looked at L, who was still watching the monitor. Light wouldn't be surprised if the guy was sulking. He did admit that he hated losing, and Light would consider this his biggest loss. Well, until the grand finale that was. He grinned to himself again as he waited for L to be forced to agree.

"Yes," was all he said.

He reached into his pocket and pulled out the key to the handcuffs that had been around both boys' wrist for over a month now. The click of the lock being opened was a signal to Light. It was the signal for his victory. L tossed him the key and he undid his own and rubbed at the wrist. It felt wonderful to be free. He had hated being stuck around the detective twenty-four seven. His insufferable insomniac, his forever unsatisfied sweet tooth, everything about him was annoying. He realized he had not felt that way before because he was not whole, thank goodness, he may have killed himself during that time to save his sanity.

He noticed that the monitor had been switched from Misa's room and that Matsuda had gone to inform her that she could leave. Not wanting to seem suspicious, Light followed him. A relieved boyfriend sharing a precious moment with his lover, they were free to be together again. He almost laughed at the very thought.

He stood at the main entrance; Misa was looking at him with that devoted stare as usual. Mogi and Matsuda were there as well. Mogi waved a simple farewell and had to drag a stricken Matsuda away, who was very upset at seeing Misa leave. Once they were gone, Light placed his hands on Misa's shoulders and then drew her in close for a hug. He frowned as he felt her bury her face into his chest. This level of devotion…it was pathetic really, but definitely useful.

"Misa, when you're certain no one else is around, I want you to go to the place I'm about to tell you about and dig something up for me," he whispered.

Misa looked at him adoringly. "Misa will do well for you, Light," she replied dreamily.

Light smiled. "I know you will," he said before giving her directions to where her Death Note lay waiting for her. He watched her as she left the building, a smirk playing about his lips. Misa would find the Death Note, Ryuk would appear since he had had the Death Gods switch Death Notes. Inside, Misa would find a letter that he had written to her. He would ask her to remember the real name of Ryuuga Hideki and thus kill L. He could hardly wait and he knew Misa would do exactly as he told her since he had written that he would love her forever if she did. Really, manipulating people was so much fun.

Misa returned the very next day. Light had to hand it to her; she was punctual in the very least. He was standing with his father and Matsuda in the main control room. Rem was standing close and L was perched on the couch with a large ice cream in his hand. He excused himself so that he could go see Misa and when they embraced, Misa, following his commands, touched him with a piece of the Death Note. Light smiled and looked towards the door.

"Long time no see, Ryuk," he said softly.

"Yo," Ryuk replied.

"L-Light, I'm so sorry. I can't remember Ryuuga Hideki's name no matter how hard I try," Misa whined.

"I see, well that's too bad," Light said, intentionally making his voice sound a little cold.

As expected, Misa latched herself onto his arm, her eyes wide. "It's okay! I've traded eyes with Ryuk!" she insisted.

Light allowed a smile before he turned to face her. Yes, he knew that she would resort to that, it was why he had the Death Gods switch notebooks in the first place since Rem would never do the deal again. He had to keep acting though, he would not give up the game, not yet.

"You idiot! That means your lifespan has…" he trailed off, sounding perfectly concerned.

"It doesn't matter, I want to help you, Light," Misa said, smiling lightly.

"I want to live in an ideal world with you for as long as possible, Misa, that's how I feel," Light whispered. Misa was overcome with joy at this and hugged him again. "So let's build it together," he added. "Just you and me."

"Yes, just the two of us," Misa whispered.

"Listen, I'm not in a position to judge criminals right now, My Misa," Light said. "So I want you to do it for me."

A few days had passed and once more Light was in headquarters. He was alone with Rem and L. L was asking Rem about the Death Note. Well, let him try all he wants, it wasn't going to change the fact that he was going to die soon. He glanced over when he heard the detective call his name. "Yes?" he asked pleasantly.

"You've finally been freed and yet you never leave this place," L pointed out.

Don't you want the company? You'll be sleeping eternally alone before long…

Light would have loved to say that, but no, he still had to keep up the charade. "The Kira case is far from over," he replied. "I don't care for romance at the moment." He paused and smiled to himself. "Or are you saying you've got a problem with me always being here?" he asked. He shouldn't have sounded so harsh, but there was also some joy in demanding answers from the great L.

L didn't even look at him. He didn't answer right away and when he did it was soft spoken and simple. "No…" he said.

But Light could feel his eyes on him and he looked right back. So what now, L?

Later on, when the rest of the team arrived, Light had to fight back laughter at how very well his plan was going. His father stormed into the room announcing that more criminals were being killed. All of which occurred after Higuchi's death.

"Which means that Higuchi wasn't Kira after all," he sighed heavily.

Light shook his head. "No, we know that he was before we captured him," he pointed out. "He admitted it himself."

"So has another Kira appeared then?" Aizawa guessed.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Matsuda complained.

L was silent for a moment. He was holding a teddy graham delicately with two fingers. After a few minutes went by he spoke. "This began right after Amane was freed," he said.

"I can't believe you would say that, Ryuuzaki," Light said instantly, defending his girlfriend for all to see.

"Well in any case, if there is someone out there using a second Death Note we'll definitely catch that person," L replied, crushing the cracker to pieces.

Light saw as L looked at the opened Death Note in front of him. He had discovered that one of the pages had been torn, a piece missing. He smiled. Perhaps the great L was about to figure something out. Light gave him some time to think about things and then decided to step in once more.

"Ryuuzaki, even if we were to catch this Kira, would we be able to get a conviction from them?"

"Of course!" Matsuda exclaimed. "They were writing down these names knowing the people would die. If we can't make the Death Note public knowledge like that, we should obliterate them!"

"That doesn't sound like the best option, but chances are the higher-ups will go that route, or close to it anyway," Aizawa replied.

"If we can prove the murders were a result of the notebook, there will be the death penalty waiting…or a life sentence in the very least," L said.

Light glanced at Rem. You know what this means, I wonder how you can just stand here and act indifferent when it's your Misa they're talking about. He smirked. He knew that Rem would have figured it out by now. Obviously the Death God would save Misa's life, which in turn would get rid of both herself and L since she was clearly interfering with a person's lifespan. Let L figure it out. He would die before he succeeded.

He was alone now, walking down a corridor. The rain was lashing against the windows. It was pouring down fiercely. Light was planning on just taking a brief walk about the place and then heading back home when he noticed a door that was usually closed was ajar. He walked towards it. Apparently it led to the roof. Light shrugged and walked up the stairs. He reached the roof and looked about, and froze. L…he was up here, standing in the rain, soaked and looking far more solemn than Light had ever seen him look.

He was looking up at the cloudy skies, and then slowly, he turned his head and his black eyes met Light's chocolate ones. What the hell are you doing up here, L?

"What are you doing out here, Ryuuzaki?" Light asked.

L stared at him and then held a hand up to his ear to show that he couldn't hear him. How infuriating. Light asked the question again, louder this time, but L shook his head and smiled, holding the hand up again. Damn you L. Light sighed and walked away from the protection of the overpass and out into the chilly rain. When he reached L he considered yelling the question into his face, for making him come out here, but he controlled the urge.

"What are you doing, Ryuuzaki?" he asked for the third time.

"It's nothing worth mentioning," L replied.

Oh really? Then why didn't you just ignore me so I could have saved myself from an unwanted rain shower?

"The sound of bells…" L continued.

Light raised an eye brow. What was he going on about? Still, there was something very sad about him right now, not that Light cared really.

"They are incredibly noisy today," L said, looking away from Light and back towards the city.

"I don't hear a thing," Light said truthfully.

"Really? They've been ringing nonstop…I can't stop thinking about them," L replied. "I wonder…maybe it's a wedding…or…"

"What are you talking about, Ryuuzaki?" Light asked, fighting to keep the exasperation out of his voice. "Stop talking nonsense, let's go inside."

L looked at him and then looked away, hanging his head in what…defeat? Well that was appealing. Did he know that he had lost?

"Sorry. Everything I say is made up on the spot so don't believe a word of it," L said softly.

Light frowned as he continued to look at him. This definitely wasn't the L he was used to. Where was that confidence? The assertiveness? Light had never imagined L to admit to something like that, even if he knew that it was a true statement. He looked incredibly sad and…alone.

Light chuckled a bit. "You're right, Ryuuzaki. The majority of what you say isn't true," he said.

"Yes…but the same applies to you," L said.

Light narrowed his eyes. "What do you mean?" he asked.

"Have you ever uttered a single completely true thing since you were born?" L replied.

Light didn't answer. His eyes just locked with L. What was with this guy? Honestly, Light was getting a bit annoyed at how he was acting right about now. Oh well, he wouldn't have to deal with it soon. So soon, he was going to win soon!

"I'm human, I lie every now and then, but I never lie to hurt anyone," Light answered.

"I knew you'd say that," L said with a soft smile.

Did you now?

"Let's go back inside, we're both soaked," L suggested.

The first thing that you've said today that's made sense!

"Yeah," Light replied.

He followed L back into the building. Great, he was soaked and cold and all he had to show for it was a sullen detective. He could say it was worth seeing L like this, but he wasn't so sure…he was pretty cold.

Once inside, Light grabbed the towel L offered and began to scrub himself dry. He was sitting on the steps, his shoes discarded by his side and the towel about his head as he attempted to dry his hair. He heard L approach but didn't look at him. He had spent far too much time looking into that pale face. He was counting down the hours until he wouldn't have to see it ever again.

"Well, that was quite the ordeal," L said casually.

"It's your fault for being out in that storm," Light pointed out.

"True, I'm sorry," L said simply and Light sincerely doubted that he really was.

He heard L moving towards him, but he kept his eyes closed, wiping at some stray drops on his face. He only opened his eyes when he felt a cold hand grab his bare foot. L was hunkered down by his feet.

"What are you doing, Ryuuzaki?" Light demanded.

"I thought I'd help…you seem so adamant about drying yourself and it was, as you said, my fault to begin with," L replied.

"It's fine, you don't have to do that," Light insisted.

"I'll throw in a massage? Just let me atone for this, I'm not at all bad you know," L suggested.

"Do as you please then," Light sighed.

Hey, why not add a bit of insult to injury? Here was the world's best detective, drying and massaging his feet. He was a God after all, and this was L bowing to him. He fought off a smile and simply looked at the other boy, wincing when he put pressure on his foot. Were massages supposed to hurt?

"Oy," Light said in warning.

"You'll get used to it shortly," L assured him.

Light felt water hitting his foot and he glanced at L's hair. It was still dripping wet. He felt something then, something that was not at all according to plans. L was looking down at his feet, his eyes hidden behind that mop of unruly hair. He still had Light's foot in hand, but he was not drying it or massaging it anymore. He looked…like he could be close to tears. Light felt a very human throb of pity in his heart. No, NO! L was going to die! He was going to triumph over him!

Still, he couldn't help himself. He grabbed his towel and leaned in close to L. He brushed it over his hair, watching drops of water raining down. "You're still wet," he whispered.

"Sorry," L said simply.

He took hold of Light's other foot and began to dry it as well. They sat in silence. Light had no clue about what could be going through L's head, though he wished he could escape his own. What were these thoughts suddenly? He had lived with the man for months and had thought of him as nothing more than a partner in the Kira case. But now…he couldn't even describe what he was feeling.

"It's sad isn't it?" L asked when he finished.

Light looked at him quizzically.

"It's nearly time to say farewell," L replied heavily, looking into Light's eyes, a sad smile on his white face.

Light's eyes widened. So you do know, L? Or are you referring to my end? No…that look on your face would definitely be different if you had some evidence pointing to me. You know…and I hate you for knowing. You have to die! It is your time to die!

L's cell phone rang but Light wasn't paying attention to what he was saying over the phone. His heart was racing. He wanted to dominant L that had not changed; he wanted to be the victor. But he suddenly realized that after tonight, he wasn't going to see this face ever again. This beautiful, unique face that only he could possess. No…what the hell was he thinking? Beautiful? More like deathly, the face of a wraith…or a fallen angel.

"Shall we go, Light-kun?" L asked.

Light blinked. L was standing, looking at him. If they went, it was the end. L would undoubtedly learn of Misa, and Rem would kill him before he could make the assumption out loud. L was turning now, walking towards his death. It was as if he were moving in slow motion. Light could stop it. He could be a merciful God.

He stood and hurried forward. He gripped the detective's shoulder tightly and turned him around. L looked at him with some surprise in his eyes.

"L-Light-kun?" he asked.

"No," he said. "You are not going in there, Ryuuzaki," he whispered.

"I don't understand, Light-kun," L replied, his eyes narrowing.

"Don't call me 'Light-kun' right now L…call me…Kira," Light ordered softly.

He didn't give L time to respond to that. He saw those narrowed eyes open their widest and he grinned, wrapping his arms about the thin detective and crushing his lips against L's.

Silent Dagger: OK, I understand that most of this is just a summary of episodes 24 and 25, but that is exactly where the story started and I wanted Light to be dealing with all of this so yeah, that's why. From here on in the plot does not follow the anime as closely as this chapter did. You know I thrive off of reviews ;)