Felines

Disclaimer: I do not own, nor ever will, Fullmetal Alchemist or the characters within.

And Then There was a Tail

Two Days Ago:

It was a normal Friday afternoon as she sat there typing hurriedly. Soft curses rose occasionally as her fingers kept tripping over the words, her mind too far ahead for her fingers to catch up. Misspelt words and strange gaps had to be fixed and she felt time was just slipping away from her. Deadlines had to be the most horrible things.

The phone rang and she sighed. It was probably another nuisance call, another telemarketer or pointless survey. She really did not want to answer it. Her breath puffed out as she picked up the phone.

"Hello." She said in abrupt tone, hoping to dissuade whoever was on the other end.

"Hello. You are the author?" A deep voice rumbled in her ear and she blinked.

"I am an author. I'm not sure I'm the author."

"It doesn't matter," the voice said. "As long as you're an author."

She blinked at the arrogant edges in the smooth voice. "Is there a point to this? I really am busy right now."

"I need ears and a tail."

There was a silence. She could not have heard him right. Ears and a tail? Who in their right mind wanted them?

"Hello? Did you hear me? I said ears and a tail." The voice impatiently broke through her amazement.

"Yeah, I heard you. Are you having me on here or what? That's just one sick joke to play." She had a deadline to meet, she didn't have time for this sort of shit.

"This is not a joke. I need you to write me ears and a tail."

"Why would you even want them?"

There was a small pause. "It's for a friend of mine."

The author's eyebrows rose. Had that been a touch of embarrassment in that deep voice? Maybe this wasn't a joke after all. "You want ears and a tail for your friend?"

"No, for me. My friend already has some, this is for me." The voice tried to speak calmly but an author knows when someone is feeling self-conscious.

"I really can't spare the time right now. I have a deadline to meet. Tomorrow's not a problem though."

"Tomorrow's no good, it has to be now." The deep voice sounded impatient.

"Then try someone else, I can't help you."

"Look it wouldn't take too long."

"I'd have to start a whole new document and plot line. I just don't have the time."

"Find the damned time! This is an emergency." The voice growled and the author blinked.

"Ears and a tail are not emergency items." She replied in a slightly stunned voice. Damn the man was serious about this whole ears and tail thing.

"They are now. Just do it, or I'll flame you from here." The author frowned. The guy was threatening her? With fire through a phone line? There had to be something seriously demented about this guy and he was wasting her precious time.

"Listen moron, I've already told you, I am busy, I have a deadline and I don't have time for this shit!" The author snapped back. "Get someone else to do it!"

"Look, wait, don't hang up. Okay, I got a bit carried away. I'm…I'm sorry." The author heard a deep breath being taken. "But if I don't get them today I'm going to have to spend another night without… without Ed. I really need them now."

"Ed? Your friend?" The author sighed and leant her elbows on her desk, one hand holding the phone to her ear, the other covered half her face. She was wasting time with this, she should just hang up. But he sounded so sincere and she had always been a sucker for sincerity.

"Please?"

"It means so much to you?" The author questioned almost absently, as she tried to understand why she was thinking of helping him when she had a deadline staring at her.

"It…he means everything to me." God, she hated the sound of sincere honest deep voices. You just couldn't refuse them.

She looked at the clock. "I can spare five minutes, I really am sorry, but I just can't give you anything more than that."

"As long as I get them, that's fine." She could hear the relief and the smile.

"Okay…I need to know your name and some basic details. Hair colour, height, that sort of thing, unless you want to go completely different?" She began opening a new page, one eye on the clock. "I hope he's worth all of this."

"He is." There was no uncertainty in the voice. "Thank you. My name is Roy…Roy Mustang…"

Roy Mustang had a very pleased smirk on his face as he entered his office on Monday morning. His initial insecurity had vanished as people had stopped and stared and his ego had been immensely gratified by the obvious admiring looks. Eyes went wide and jaws dropped as he sauntered into the office.

"Ch…Chief, you… you have…" Havoc stuttered as he stared at the ears. Ears that twitched and flickered in the dark hair.

"And a tail?" Fuery's voice nearly squeaked it went so high. They all looked and saw the tip of the sleek black tail moving at the edge of the butt skirt. Roy's smirk got wider and he kept walking into the inner office and his waiting desk.

"Did you see that?" Havoc fell back in his chair, his eyes still wide.

'What the hell happened? I thought only Ed…?" Breda shook his head and they both stared at each other.

"I'm sure the Colonel has a good reason for it." Hawkeye said with a wry smile and they all looked at her.

"A good reason?" The office burst out laughing.

Pounding footsteps had them all looking to the door and Edward appeared in his usual haphazard manner. The crew looked at him and noted the golden ears and tail. This was normal.

"About time you appeared, shorty." The Colonel's voice drawled and Ed stared at the man who had appeared in the doorway. The others waited but the expected tirade from Ed didn't happen. The blond was frowning and his hands were fisted but the insults and curses they were positive he was mentally spewing never made it past his tightly clenched jaw.

"You are a bastard." Edward said in a tight voice.

Roy smirked and his tail flicked from under his uniform. "Your idea."

"Shut up." Ed hissed. He didn't need to be reminded. Two whole days. The bastard had had the ears and tail for two whole days and he was taking full advantage of being able to make all the short comments he could. The ears and tail had to go soon, they just had to.

"If your little legs can manage it, you can take these files to the Library." The smirk was wider as Roy held up a couple of folders. His ears twitched as he caught the muttered 'fuck you bastard' as Ed came closer. "If you're really good, we can do that later, shrimp." He lowered his voice slightly, almost purring and saw the shiver that went through the blond.

Ed snatched the files from him and left the office, his face going red and Roy laughed softly. Black eyes met the interested gaze of the others and he merely smirked before turning back into his office.

Roy leant back in his chair, smiling as he picked up the phone and dialled.

"It's Roy Mustang, you remember me?"

"Oh yes, the ears and the tail guy. You want them written off now?"

"Oh no, I'd like it if you could keep them written on for another week."

Author's Note: So this is the epilogue as Spirix did do a final chapter for Mail. And this is where it definitely ends for these two. Thank you so much for coming along with me for this little ride… smiles

Just a small background on this one : Mary wanted to know how Roy ended up persuading (begging) for his attachments in Whisker Two and I wrote this for her a while ago, although the last bit I added a few weeks ago when the demon (Spirix) said she was going to do a last chapter to Mail… which was good because my writing time has been curtailed greatly this last week due to some major family stuff and it would have been another couple of weeks before I had any time to do this…

Thank you again to everyone who followed this and commented. It's been a lot of fun and I just hope you enjoyed this as much as I did.

silken :)