A/N: Sorry, no lemon this chapter. :) There's just.. that.. THING... Which is.. angsty fluff.. and.. stuff..
Disclaimer: Fai really doesn't want me to own this. Even though he knows he wants Kuro-puu.
Enjoy.
EDIT: This is the end. The very very very very end. :) So read slowly and scrutinize. And I fixed the italics and stuff.
The kid and the princess hadn't returned unharmed. Their mental states were unstable, and they kept blacking out, asking whether the world they were in was a dream before fainting.
Kurogane could tell the mage was worried. He didn't let himself feel the same emotion--the kid (whichever one he was) and the princess weren't weak-hearted. They would pull through. At this point in time, this belief wasn't a conviction. It was a fact.
So, he let himself reflect (he'd been doing that a lot lately) on what he'd done and, more importantly, why.
Kurogane let himself fall back to the wooden wall, watching over the sleeping kids. It had been about ten hours since he had woken up and everything else happened, and it was almost dusk.
He hadn't really needed an answer to his own feelings that first kiss, but for him to insist like an eager idiot would be beyond him if he hadn't felt something for Fai.
And then, he had clumsily shoved his tongue into Fai's mouth. He flushed again, glad that the kids were asleep, and wondered how the hell he had been able to do that. It was embarrassing--and what would his tongue taste like? He shuddered at the thought. But it was a last minute thing to get Fai to acknowledge his existence instead of running away.
He still didn't understand how having someone put their tongue in your mouth was pleasurable, but Fai seemed to have liked it, and those women in Tomoyo's court had tried to shove their tongues down his throat, thinking that it would pleasure him.
They hadn't, but he hadn't liked them at all, and killing them would probably have made Tomoyo very unstable and make him do things that he really wouldn't want to do.
For example, taking a walk with him and then making him dress up in some frilly outfit that wouldn't make him happy. At all.
But he had been too aroused when Fai had moaned, and when that defiant eye finally fell shut to a desperation that he didn't thing was possible, that arousal had asserted itself to his lower regions. What the hell had happened to his control?
He knew, for certain, that he liked Fai more than what was necessary. Cared, even. The entire fake aura made him interested in the first place, and, he thought sourly, how he usually did not associate with idiots after a battle was over.
However, Fai was a paradox--a paradox that made his bodily functions freak out of control, and then further sensitize him to those feelings that he understood so well and made him empathetic. And, if he followed that thinking to its reasonable conclusion that made him acknowledge all of this in the first place, he would end up being kind. Just like his father was.
Kurogane wasn't one to deny facts, but at this point, denial was all that he could really come up with. Being too accepting was a fool's way to death, yet to deny everything would do the same thing.
He didn't really want to become a fool--and with Fai being the topic of discussion, he supposed the conclusion for his own feelings had to be a little harder to find.
But this was frustrating, dammit! He had a sense of honor and everything else could go to hell. He needed a solid answer, and he still didn't have one. Of course, his body had enjoyed kissing Fai and the sounds Fai made and he was comfortable in the mage's presence and he wanted to protect Fai and--
Shit.
…
Shit.
Why was it that he was the idiot in these situations? His own mouth knew before he could, but it simply didn't want to say that sentence to Fai because it wanted him to find out on his own.
And now, he was thinking that his mouth had a brain.
He brought his palm to his forehead and growled to himself unintelligibly.
He is my important person.
He sounded too much like the kid. That determination was too robotic. However, he respected the kid for his independence and that sole conviction because it required true loyalty and trust that what he was doing was the right thing to do, without a doubt in his mind.
The door slid quietly open and closed, Fai entering the room and sitting next to the princess with a reverential air. Kurogane watched him with his eyes, trying to feel the effect of the other person's presence to his emotions.
He was calmer. He felt a little more reassured, but for what, he didn't know.
There was silence between them, not uncomfortable, yet it wasn't settled at all.
It was like that for a long time.
The kids' mental stability eventually got so that they were only sleeping most of the time, and Fai would leave their sides more willingly and for more purposes other than relieving bodily needs. Nothing much had changed between them with the tension that the kids had brought.
"Ne, Kurogane…" Fai said to him in one of the timeless hours that they had given furtive glances at each other, not quite understanding their relationship, yet trying to convey something only to look hastily away.
They were sitting next to each other this time.
"What?" he grunted, looking over the kids' sleeping faces.
A warm and slender hand touched his own tentatively, making him look at Fai's face--which was suddenly quite near his own.
"Kiss me…" Fai's breath ghosted over his own lips, and he could taste that same taste that was so unique to Fai from that last time he had kissed him. His eyes widened, and took in Fai's faint flush and half-lidded eye, so disturbingly erotic that by the time he had decided to kiss him, he had already tipped forward and pushed his lips against his.
Fai's lips were trembling, betraying his own insecurity about what they were, if they even were anything. Kurogane knew he was the one that decided if Fai was alone or not--the mage had already taken a leap of faith to actually enlighten him on his feelings (even though it was damn hard to scrutinize because the man just kept on flipping on and off the mask).
Kurogane felt that strange surge of protectiveness well up in him at the thought of Fai being alone (again), and growled to himself. He tilted his body towards Fai and pulled the lithe body nearer to his own, almost making the mage sit in his lap.
"K-Kurogane?" Fai whispered uncertainly. Why was the mage so damn hesitant? He had already kissed him, stuck his tongue into his mouth, and then gave him the implication of that. It was frustrating, to say in the least, that he couldn't trust him just for this--whatever this was.
Kurogane didn't answer Fai's question unasked question, just settled in between his legs more comfortably and pulled him down by the chin to kiss him again.
And, of course, Fai tried to pull away for some reason--"The kids," he whispered, turning his head away from Kurogane's, looking worriedly over his shoulder to where the kid and the princess lay side by side.
Why did Fai have to be so difficult? The simple position they were in was making him aroused.
Because everyone he treasured died? a voice mocked, and since you're next, he's thinking you'll disappear too.
Kurogane's grip on Fai's arms stiffened at the thought. It was amazing how fast Fai's golden eye snapped back to his, panic clear on his expression for that one moment before being covered up by a strained smile, "But if Kuro-sama wants to… here--" The omission of what they were going to do was duly noted.
The voice grated on his ears, so fake that he nearly pushed Fai off of him, his arousal taken care of by the anger and underlying hurt that Fai couldn't trust him. Instead, he relaxed his grip on Fai's arms and stared directly into that gold eye, unconsciously flexing his synthetic arm. He waited for the mask to fall.
They remained like that for a prolonged silence, Fai's smile cracking at the edges with his legs straddling his hips, while Kurogane looked on into Fai's golden eye, dispassionate.
In the end, Fai fell lightly against his chest, hiding his expression behind Kurogane's peripheral vision.
At least he wasn't running away.
He sighed, breathing in Fai's scent and hesitantly bringing his arms up to hold him. He felt Fai shudder with an internal struggle before completely falling limp within his embrace. Normally, Kurogane wasn't one for sentimental moments, but he supposed Fai was the exception--he ignored the part of him that said that the mage was worth it, letting those fluttery feelings stay in the back of his mind for now.
They stayed like that, Fai's head resting in the niche of Kurogane's neck, his faint breaths skimming across his collarbone, his hair brushing against his lips, while Kurogane's arms held his insubstantial weight against his chest.
After a few minutes, Kurogane tilted his head slightly towards Fai, who had gone silent. Even if this was a peaceful moment, he didn't think he could count on him to be quiet for long. "Oy," he murmured. Fai better not have fallen asleep on him.
There was no conscious response, only the nuzzling of Fai's face deeper into the crook of his neck, asleep.
"Kurogane…" Fai's voice was soft and muffled, and he was struck with how tender it sounded, undemanding and content and…
Loving.
He had always known it was there--ever since that second kiss--but to hear it and acknowledge it in Fai's tone of his name was stunning enough to stand by itself. He touched on all of the other times his name, maimed or no, had been used and found the coldness in each. The first times, with those damnable nicknames, had an exuded coldness that Fai used to discard his existence. The time after he had changed Fai into a vampire, they were so suffused with hate and loathing that he half expected Fai's body to break under the strain.
And now, with this, it was so soft that he wanted to smile, and he knew that it would have that same feeling that Fai had given to him.
So he did.
The next morning, Kurogane awoke to find himself with one hell of a sore body and his arms empty, sending him into a very bad mood. Unfortunately, his body screamed whenever he moved, so even if he could kill people now, he technically couldn't.
Nevertheless, he made himself stand and lean against the wall. Even if he didn't want to admit it, he was pissed that he didn't wake up with Fai in his arms and all that cliché crap. He could at least have some reward for his pains, and damn, they hurt like hell.
The said magician decided, at that moment, to slide the door open. Fai smiled at him, saying with low volume, "Good morning, Kurogane."
Ugh. That goddamn smile was disarming him again, and he couldn't come up with the retort he wanted to, like, Good morning for you, or Yeah, you think so, don't you? or something. Instead, he grunted and looked away, preoccupying himself with taking in the kids' health and not how the smile was unguarded for once.
The kid was pale, still, along with the princess. Their complexion had improved since when they first came back, but they still couldn't feed them solid foods, so it was up to them to come back faster.
Kurogane could hear Fai's feet approaching from his leaning position, but he kept his eyes averted. He had killed his impression of a ninja--who heard of one who cuddled?
Fai's face appeared under his own, grinning. "Kurogane was really really cute this morning," he said, his breath puffing into Kurogane's face--he was that close.
"Shut up. It was your fault. You fell asleep on me." He never thought he would have to use that in a literal sense, but, as always, Fai seemed to defy those circumstances.
He expected more teasing like the cheerful Fai would do, but this one smiled and abruptly hugged him, murmuring in his ear, "Thank you." He succeeded (with much difficulty) to not blush, and just concentrated on Fai's arms around his neck, breathing in that heady scent that was so intoxicating that he swore it was an aphrodisiac.
He brought his hands up, hesitantly again, to wrap them around Fai.
It was the only way he could thank him in return.
---
"The greatest thing you'll ever learn is just to love and be loved in return." -Moulin Rouge
A/N: I actually used a quote for my story. I feel so special! Well, it may have been just a tad odd place to hold off, but Kurogane POV smut is just... AGH. I'll send you the uncut version of this chapter, however, you'll see that this type of smut is not angsty. At all. It's just.. Kurogane gets horny and then BAM! Sex. Tada. Nothing. At. All. And Fai looks like a pansy--not a nice way to go.
Edit: I will NOT be posting the smut here. Or anywhere, for that matter. PM me or review for it--Fai's version or Kurogane's or both; please specify. XD