Chapter 5
When she came back home she was still in somewhat of a daze. She still felt the warmth of him against her and the tingling sensation his hands tracing her spine left behind. Her lips were still a bit swollen from their kissing but were happily spread into a smile. 'Wow', was the only word she could think of at the moment to express everything she was feeling.
She inhaled deeply and could smell his scent that clung to her clothes. She went to her room, dropped down on the bed and closed her eyes returning her thoughts to that afternoon. After his declaration they kissed for awhile, at first gently and then more and more passionately. It felt like his hands were everywhere but they considerately kept away from the inappropriate areas. Instead, they roamed her back and waist, occasionally framing her face or weaving into her hair. She was pleased by it and appreciated him holding back, as it was too soon for her to go that far. She was also a little surprised by his consideration. Well, her hands weren't shy and explored too. In the heat of the moment she felt bold enough to slip them beneath his shirt and feel the soft and warm expanse of his skin and the muscles beneath them. In a moment like this she was actually glad he was a football player. After a while they slowed down trying to unsuccessfully cool down with gentle caresses and soft kisses. Her heart wouldn't stop jumping in her chest as his eyes locked on hers. Her eyes traced the lines of his face and soon her hands tentatively joined them. He closed her eyes and leaned into her hand and she marveled at the feeling his action caused. It was like he surrendered to her, she thought but immediately berated herself for the silly thought. And then they just sat there in each others arms, facing each other, their thoughts occupied with what this could lead to.
And even though the silence felt comfortable, she started talking. It wasn't that she felt awkward or embarrassed (as she thought she would). It was the fact that she was giddy and the feeling wanted to burst out and spread. She also wanted to get to know him. She started with small talk which felt kind of weird giving the position they were in, pressed against each other in his truck, and what they've been doing. They were so past small talk. He gave her an amused look but played along acknowledging her effort. She searched for topics they might have in common and she came up with two. School and her father aka The Coach. She didn't want to think about her father just after their make out session since that would inevitably lead to thinking about his reaction to said make out session. So, she talked about school. She was worried he would think her boring or lame but she soon had him laughing with funny stories of her teachers and cheeky answers of her classmates. Since he had her professors he could relate and was soon telling her his own stories. He had more of them and they were amusing bordering on insolent and bold. It fascinated her because she could never be so forward towards her teachers.
She felt so nervous and anxious but in a good way, like that old cliché about butterflies in the stomach. She was so aware of him and he was of her. His eyes followed every move, shift or gesture she made. Being in the centre of his attention was both exhilarating and scary. It gave her confidence and made her want to hide at the same time. But she liked the way he looked at her and she in turn couldn't keep her eyes from him too.
They veered into the topic of football which she knew she couldn't evade, not that she wanted to. She made peace with the fact that she lived in Dillon, Texas. Everybody talked about football here. It also didn't help that her father was the football Coach, her ex-boyfriend a football player and Tim… whatever he was to her… was also a footballer.
He asked her whether she really didn't like football.
"I love it." she answered, a little defensively, "I practically grew up with it.".
She paused in thought and he waited for her to continue.
"When I was little, my dad and I would play football in the imaginary football field that was in our back yard." she smiled, remembering, "He didn't care that I was a girl. We would toss the ball around and he would explain the rules, the tactics, game plans…"
She paused again and he brushed his hands against hers, his fingers starting to draw patterns on her skin. She looked down at them and said in a quieter voice:
"Then football started to come between us. I started growing up and wanted to do stuff other girls did and he spent so much time being busy with coaching and watching game tapes. I started resenting it."
She finished talking and looked up. He was listening carefully. Still, she didn't want to talk about her issues and family problems so she deflected the attention and asked him why he liked it so much.
He looked at her for a moment until she looked away and then answered honestly
"It's my whole life, the only thing I like doing… the only thing I know how to do. "
"I'm a fuck up" he added and she looked up starting to protest but he waved her off and continued "No, I know I am, but it would be worse without football. It forces me to try to give my best, at least on the field." he finished, suddenly looking a bit self conscious at his revelation.
"I get it. Writing is like that for me." she said trying to tell him she understood. They continued talking, veering into different topics, trying to discover more things about each other. She was glad that they could actually talk to each other, that whatever they had wasn't just physical. And when their conversation came to a lull she caught his gaze and added softly.
"Hey…, I don't think you're a fuck up."
The swear word sounded strange coming from her mouth and he smiled and leaned in to kiss her again.
They were so involved with each other they almost lost track of time, but luckily he got her home before anybody could even notice she was gone. Being driven home by Tim Riggins was another surreal experience she never dreamed of happening to her. It was sweet and thoughtful and he knew better then to do anything less.
So now she's in her room daydreaming about one of the best days of her life. Wow… What else is there to say?
AN: Yeah, I'm back. I know it's been a long time and that sorry is not enough.
Still, thank you for reading and reviewing. I really don't deserve you guys! Please tell me what you think about this chapter.
Special thanks to:
cenababy, saderia, HopelessRomantic44, jcool789, A9L9O8N7E, bmxmama2, falsebeginnings, Luckylily, shaybay55, mbmjr07, jensen's Angel, wrenbailey, lilskigrl72, newyorklghts, Jommy23, three2raise, WhoJackman, Mandamirra10, barelybreathing, michelley, soundspretty, Heloise, Grace, coffeelover328, Destiny42, Kira