Part I Laoshi Fei
"Cowards!" The young boy clenched his fists, his nails
hurting his skin. "Get away from me, all of you cowards!"
The boy closed his eyes, the sting unbearable. He raised
his hands, trying to cover his eyes from the sand the other boy was kicking
at him. He cursed himself, as he began to cough. The other boy laughed.
Hearing the other kid mock him, Wu Fei forced himself to stop, closing
his hand tighter around his small sword.
Shuan Ho laughed wickedly, his lips curling, his slanted
eyes flashing evil. He kicked sand at him again. "Looser!"
The sand didn't hurt him like the boy's words did. Shuan
Ho smiled, knowing that his words hurt the little boy. Wu fei lowered his
head. Shuan Ho had proven to be a better fighter. A better man than him.
He closed his eyes, telling his mind to stay calm, that the other boy wanted
him to loose his temper. He wouldn't get anything from this.
Shuan Ho smiled wider. He bowed low, mocking the boy with
a small gesture with his sword. He laughed again, as he turned and joined
his friends and walked away coldly.
Wu Fei swung his sword at the sandy floor, embedding it
in it. He clenched his fists harder. "Next time, I win," he shouted at
the boys. "I'll return over and over to challenge you!" Shuan Ho didn't
look back.
The wind picked up, the sand blowing over his bare feet.
The sounds of bitter laughter rang in his ears. Wu Fei bowed his head lower,
his ponytail swinging down his neck. Days. He had spent days training for
this fight, and still he had lost. What had it mattered that he had spent
hours at night sweating as he practised? all for nothing. Shuan Ho had
won. The boy was better than him, more prepared, more concentrated. Wu
Fei felt his heart about to brake. Why?
He shook his head, making his thoughts go away. He frowned.
He must put this new scars behind him, make the pain subside. He turned
around, his shoulders not quite steady. A shamed man.
*****
The smell of the flowers outside her house made his nose
cringe. He ran his hand over it, thinking about the many times he's been
to this house. The familiar scent of its modesty and its aged beauty. He
stares up at the hanging green vines. A beauty marred by the oppression
of the ones that in a past had been their safety.
A lot had changed since the Federation had become what
they are today. Obasan seemed to remember a time before this oppression
that he would never understand.
He frowned, removing his pilot goggles. She would never
know about his actions. He would choose when to tell her.
The house was quiet, the old woman's small rooms adorned
with her natural flowers silent. He stood in the living room, listening
to the chimes in the windows, looking at the paper lanterns in the back
porch. Swinging back and forth in the breeze. Wu Fei bowed reverently at
the small shrine that the old lady kept by the door. he walked softly,
his bare feet treading quietly on the wooden floor. He could not hear Obasan.
He held his breath wondering if she was all right. He heard that many people
had been hurt in the last Federation patrolling. He bit his lip. Those
people should have never gone against them. They were weak compared to
the soldiers. He bit his lips harder, hoping that Obasan had been wiser
and had stayed in her house.
He frowned as he entered the old woman's room. It was
dark, the long curtains flowing in the wind over her bed. Wu Fei gasped,
his voice echoing in the room.
"Shao erzi,"
The old woman was in the small garden that lead outside
her room. The young boy walked outside, joining her. Obasan smiled at the
child, running her hand on his cheek. She smiled as he bowed respectfully.
"Goodness child," she said. "Times are rough and you come
to visit me?" Wu Fei smiled at her. He bowed again, his pony tail bouncing.
"Anything to see you, Obasan." The old woman held him
close to her breasts affectionally, stroking his pony tail. He smiled,
feeling her warmth, smelling her maternal scent. It was worth going all
the troubles a child faces trying to get through the city of the colony
these days. He had wanted to see her.
She had cared for him since he was a baby. He had hated
to have been separated from her when his family moved from the Ling Chen
district to the west side of the colony.
"I hope that you have been a good boy, shao," she said.
He nodded. "How about you help me water these golden Verdolaga flowers
and then we can have tea and some fresh baked cookies?" She picked the
bucket of soil by her side.
Wu Fei laughed. he loved her cookies. He frowned, letting
her walk before him. He pulled his long shirt over his waist. he bit his
lip, hoping Obasan wouldn't notice what he carried there. He cursed for
bringing them with him, but there had been no time for returning them back
home and run all the way to her house. The lab was so far away from both
houses. He ran his palms on his face. He hoped his grandmother wouldn't
notice the strange reddish colour around his cheeks and eyes, nor the small
marks on his wrists. He shook his head softly. Obasan wasn't looking for
those things. She was just happy that her grandson had come visit her.
Wu Fei sent those guilty thoughts to the back of his mind.
He followed her closely, smiling at her as she watered the plants kindly.
Each bud bending under the water. He stared up at her face. Her arms were
as strong as they had always been. Like when she had cared for him when
he was a baby. Her white hair hung down her back in a long braid. Her long
red Chinese dress moved softly as she walked slowly across the garden.
She was just as he remembered her to be.
She seemed fine in her easy manner, watering the plants.
He felt his cheeks colour in shame. He had ran all the way to her home's
door steps believing that she was sick or hurt. He startled. She was talking
to him.
She was telling him about the small seedlings she was
growing. He smiled, watching her take the small seeds tenderly. The smell
of greenery soft in the air. Driving away the sickening smell of metallic
chrome from the lab that he could still smell.
Wu Fei went to her side, wanting to help her. The Old
Woman let him have the a small shovel so that he could help her bury some
new seedlings. Obasan removed the soil carefully, placing it over the plants.
Wu Fei imitated her, his child's face brightening as she told him how to
do it right. He tried not to dig too much soil, covering the seeds kindly,
like his Obasan.
His grandmother stood back, laughing as he bit his lip,
trying desperately not to mess up. She smiled wide as the boy got on his
heels, reaching up to the plants. She lowered her eyes sadly.
She had noticed the strange smell in the boy, the marks
on his white skin, the way his eyes moved, the way he was breathing. She
frowned sadly. She didn't have to see the things he carried on his waist.
She knew. Wu Fei didn't notice how she was looking at them as if they hurt
her eyes.
"Wu Fei san," she said. the boy turned to her, noticing
the sad tone in her voice. He dropped the shovel, gasping silently. Obasan
had seen them. She turned from him, going back inside her house, her shoulders
hunched. The small boy closed his eyes, willing the look she gave him to
leave.
He walked inside his head bowed. She was walking hurriedly,
like when she is disappointed, to her small living room. She stood before
the huge statues she kept before the windows, looking at them, her eyes
glazed. Wu Fei felt his head hurt. She sighed heavily, turning to him.
"Shao, times are dangerous," she said. "There is so much
grief in the colonies, and you have turned foolish."
Wu Fei wanted to speak, but a child only listens as his
elders speak. He felt Shuan Ho's defeat again, hard in his chest. He wanted
to rip the goggles apart. Obasan was talking again, her voice passionate.
"I thought you had become a man."
The boy bit his lip, his eyesight clouding. He raised
his eyes, hoping Obasan would see how he felt in them." You came here to
see that I was safe? Well, shao, I am safer than you. I can take care of
myself unlike what the others in the family say. I am strong woman."
Wu Fei bowed his head again, his eyes hurting. His heart
racing madly. He had thought she was hurt, lowered her to the state of
a weakling. Her, who was older and wiser than him. He was a fool. He dropped
to the wooden floor, kneeling before her, ashamed to be such a grandson
not to trust his elders. Obasan closed his eyes as he kneeled. She stopped
talking, her eyes sad. The boy bowed his head low over the floor. She walked
closer to him, her slow pace soft on the wood, her bare feet wrinkled.
He closed his eyes tight. She reached down to touch his shoulders. He startled.
He raised his head. Her eyes searched his soul, her eyebrows
lifted alarmingly. "Who is making you do this, shao?"
He gasped looking at her eyes, seeking to drive away the
fear she was giving him. He drew back from her touch, his eyes wide. She
gasped. She felt her heart rip to pieces as she saw a strange new madness
in his eyes. A feverish look in them. He frowned at her, his eyes wild.
"I want to do this, Obasan!"
She cried out to him, as he got up with an agility she
had never seen his master. He didn't listen, turning away from her. She
reached for him, her old wrinkled hands groping after his fast movements.
The house felt hot now. He closed his eyes, and ran outside the room. Down
the wooden steps. Away from her. Away from her pitiful eyes, his bare feet
burning in the hot sand. She lowered her hands, a small tear trailing down
her cheek.
"Wu Fei..."
*****
The child screamed his fingers clawing at the arms of
the metal chair as the electrical shocks burnt him. He snarled, his hand
brushing his black hair out from his eyes, concentrating on doing better.
The incredible speed that the machine was reaching made it impossible for
his arms to control the rotating seat. He cursed, tasting blood as his
teeth broke his tongue.
He screamed again as his back slammed into the metal seat.
He lay limp, letting the spinning machine move freely,
his arms and mind tried to concentrate. His eyes lost their focus. He closed
them, his brows knitting together in anger.
He gasped, releasing a small scream as the machine stopped,
the impact smashing him him forwards into the steering mechanism. He yelled
as the bar that held him in place gave way and he dropped to the ground.
Hard, solid in his face. He lay there strangely numb and shaken.
"The rotating motion of the machine sickens you child?"
The old man came closer to him. His shoe heels clanking loudly in the floor.
He reached down to help the young boy to his feet, steadying him.
The boy leaned into him grasping the professor's white
lab coat. He felt nausea coming on strong.
"You have to master it completely or I wont be able to
put you in the cockpit model. You have become weak after all the way you
had come, child." The old man brushed the boy's messy hair back from his
face. He pulled the boy's hair out of the messed up pony tail and combed
it with his fingers. He re did the ponytail.
Wu Fei wanted to speak, to tell the professor that the
machine was fine, that he could master it soon enough, that it didn't matter
how much his bones threatened to brake, how much his insides hurt. He'd
master it. The old man helped him to a seat next to the simulator. The
old man stood before him looking at the boy's shaking body, noting scientifically
all the changes he was going through. He was disappointed in Wu Fei's performance.
"The Mobile Suit is going to be a lot more than that spinning
machine. It's going to be harder, nerve jutting."
Wu Fei raised his head in defiance. He was fully aware
of what the Suit would be. He gritted his teeth, his eyes angered. His
body refused to become hard. He frowned. The professor would have to apply
stronger chemicals on him, make him harder. He pulled at the skin in his
arm feeling it like rubber. The surface cells peeled off in layers. The
professor put his hand on his shoulders.
"Something in your head is blocking your abilities, "
he said. "Whatever it is, take it out. In this you have to be strong, forget
the things you know-"
Wu Fei gasped. He frowned. "I am strong professor! Trust
me!"
The old man's eyes glowed with a strange light. He smiled,
a bit wickedly, his lip twitching. "Wakateru yo" The old man crossed his
arms over his chest. Wu fei clenched his fists, getting up from the seat.
"Put me on the machine again," he said.
The old man turned around and lead the boy back to the
simulator. He looked back at the boy. Wu fei reached a hand up to steady
himself with the machine's body. He felt his head spinning, the floor dancing
beneath his feet, the walls twisting. The air smelled putrid, his bones
felt weak, his belly hurt. He gripped the machine's harness, ready to get
on it again. He doubled over in pain.
The professor smiled to himself as the boy's body twisted
over convulsing as he wretched on the floor his arms wrapped over his belly.
He bent down and pulled the boy straight, pulling him
closer to his body. He reached down and cleaned the boy's mouth with his
lab coat. The boy's body danced dizzily on his arms. Wu Fei looked up at
his face, his eyes sunk in dark pits.
"Go home, Wu Fei-"
*****
It must have been something that Ching's mifan had caused
him. Or maybe it was that he had eaten too many dangao. He held on to the
small bathroom sink as his body shook with convulsions. He threw up again.
His head hurt so much and every time he bent over, the room shifted.
"Wu Fei, are you ok in there?"
He startled. His aunt knocked on the door again. The knocks
seemed to loud, to shrill, like glass shattering. The boy covered his ears.
He his senses have become too keen. The woman knocked again. He closed
his eyes willing the pain to go away. He opened the door.
"You don't look too good, Wu Fei san," she said. She ran
a hand over his brow. "At least you don't have a fever. Did you eat too
much?" He lowered his eyes, slightly irritated. Ching was talking too loud.
Her perfume was too penetrating.
"Onegai, Ching sama," he said in a low voice. her shook
his head. He walked back to the living room where the rest of the family
was assembled. Ching shook her head smiling. She never understood the boy.
Some of his cousins were playing a small ball game by
the garden door. He sat with them, trying to forget. Ling, the eldest greeted
him and welcomed him into the game. Yi Yi, smiled at him, glad to see his
cousin after so long.
Ching frowned. Her father called her attention to the
table. Ojisan was congratulating her fine cooking. She smiled, barely listening
to the old man. She was looking at her nephew. She noticed the boy was
acting a bit strange. She frowned. He seemed a lot keener to each little
noise. His eyes narrowed as if in pain at the minimal sounds, the other
kids talking. She served her guests some more baicai filling her plates
like a robot.
Wu Fei, she noticed, acted faster, more alert, than any
of the two boys. He didn't miss any of the times his turn came. He was
quicker, almost feral, and ten times more astute, it seemed to her. When
his turn was over, though, he'd close his eyes as if he were extremely
tired. His lips parted slightly. She shook her head. she must be seeing
things because she was worried over him. She turned her attention back
to Ojisan.
She stopped pouring the food, her gaze falling on Obasan.
The old lady, still and silent, was looking at Wu Fei intently just like
she had been doing a few moments ago. The old woman's face had an expression
of pain.
Ching gasped silently, her attention grabbed by the kid's
again. Ling was shaking Wu Fei's shoulders intently, trying to make the
boy snap up. Wu Fei raised his hands quickly pushing the small boy away.
He snarled. Yi Yi frowned drawing away from him slightly worried. Wu Fei
lowered his eyes, his face blushing, his eyes refocusing on his cousins.
Ling crossed his arms, angry at him, but Wu Fei didn't seem to be aware
of the boy's anger, or what he had done.
Ching was about to leave her place by the table and walk
over and stop her children from quarrelling with the boy when she heard
Obasan's voice. The young woman turned to look at the old lady.
"Leave them be, Ching san," The young lady nodded, accepting
the older woman's wise advise.
Ling talked loudly, his eyes angry, asking Wu Fei what
was wrong with him. Wu Fei wasn't paying attention to the boy, his face
twisting as if something was hurting him. Ling's voice hurt his ears. The
boy brought his hands to his ears. Yi Yi whimpered, scared by Wu Fei's
actions. He looked like a mad man. Ling drew back from him.
"Ting!" Wu Fei screamed his voice harsh. "Your screams
are hurting me, Ling!" He tried to get away from the two boys, drawing
backwards. Both boys gasped letting him get away.
Ching gasped, her heart hurting. The boy's yelling had
caught the adult's attention. Wu Fei lowered his head, realizing that he
had screamed, feeling his family looking at him. He felt his cheeks colour.
Their soft gasps were like sharp scratches on a board to him. He gritted
his teeth and ran from the living room. His cousins looked at him worried.
Ching was about to cry out when Ojisan got up from his
chair, pushing the table forward slightly, his face worried.
"Wu Fei shao...?"
The young woman brought her hand to her mouth, her brows
knitted. She turned to see what Obasan would say, but as she turned to
look at the old lady, she gasped.
The old woman was not in her seat.
*****
He slammed his head into the mattress, the hard surface
driving the noise in his head away. He felt hot tears slide down his cheeks.
He brushed them away, ashamed that he'd managed to cry. He got down and
reached under his bed bringing out a small metal box.
He opened it carefully and sat down on the floor next
to it. He took out the long needle inside and a small silver bottle. He
bit his lip, working with agility, filling the needle with the reddish
liquid inside the bottle. Careful not to spill it, his hands worked with
dexterity. He frowned.
The professor had warned him that the effect of the drug
would wear off leaving behind terrible pain. He had warned him to keep
injecting himself often or the chemical wouldn't work. His head was spinning
just like when he had gotten on the Mobile Suit's cockpit. He gritted his
teeth. He needed to become stronger or else he'd never be able to drive
Nactac. his colony, the professor, none of them needed a weak man. his
mind, his body, his whole self must become stronger- even if it hurts.
He moaned softly as the hot fluid broke into his veins. His senses quieted
down, the noise residing.
The small boy relaxed letting his body fall back on the
paper wall next to his bed.
He gasped.
Ore no Tameni
By: Team Bonet