Save Me, Please?
Ryou X Yami Bakura
Cold. He was cold. And there was nothing he or anyone else could do about it.
Or was there?
Ryou: What are you going to do to me?
Mersedes: You'll see
Yami: What the hell is that supposed to mean? ""Stares menacingly"" Don't you dare touch my hikari ""crushes Ryou in a hug""
Ryou: uuuh, Yami?
Yami: ""growl"" My Hikari
Mersedes: Alright, alright… I'm just borrowing him, I'll return him. Uh, a bit damaged, though… ""hides""
Gomen nasai--I'm sorry
Hikari--light
Yami--dark
Kami-sama--God
He rubbed his face tiredly, staring at the cracks in the sidewalk. He sidestepped the anthills carefully, and smiled softly as he watched the tiny critters speed away to work on their new conquests. He shivered as a cold breeze penetrated his thin jacket.
The day wasn't too cold, but he was walking home in his fully buttoned uniform. He licked his lips. Maybe he'd go home, and even have some hot chocolate. He still had that report to finish, even though it wasn't due until for a few more days. And then maybe he would do some math and chemistry. Hopefully, Bakura would come home on time and eat dinner with him…
Hopefully, he'd get some peaceful sleep tonight. Suddenly, his throat constricted and he accidentally squashed an anthill. The powder flew all over the crack in the sidewalk. Those thoughts…I wish I could get rid of those terrible thoughts. His chest constricted painfully, but he breathed in and out to try to calm himself. Just breathe, calm down, he thought to himself.
"Ryou!"
The white haired teen paused in mid-step. Although he really didn't want to deal with him today, he didn't know how to escape his company. And he really just wanted to be alone today. He quickly wiped his blurred eyes on his sleeve, and plastered a smile on his face. Perfect. No one notices anything, anyway. He turned around to face Yugi. He waved, but his smile nearly faltered when he saw that others from the group were trailing right behind him. And that Bakura wasn't there.
"Yugi!" He tried to smile warmly. From the looks on the others' faces, he'd accomplished it. "Atemu, Joey, Seto! How are you?" He hated how his face stretched into a smile. It was so fake. His facial muscles ached. He wished he could just scamper away, leaving the happy group behind.
"Come on! We're going to the arcade!" Yugi declared, excitedly.
Ryou bit his lip, and adjusted his backpack straps. Oh boy…
"Oh, um, I'm sorry about that guys, but I don't think I can come," Ryou mumbled apologetically. He looked up from underneath his bangs to face the puzzled group. He fingered his ring nervously. Hopefully they'd buy it. All he wanted to do was go home. His head twinged slightly. And maybe he'd take a nap before starting his homework. Kami-sama knew how much he needed one of those.
"Ryou, come on, it'll be fun!" Yugi countered.
"We don't bite," Joey joked catching up to Yugi. He flashed a white-toothed smile at Bakura, who uneasily returned it.
"Except for the mutt here…" Seto ruffled Joey's hair.
"Hey!" Joey retorted, socking Seto in the arm. They glared at each other.
Ryou couldn't help but truly smile at their childishness. He forlornly wished he could be comfortable around them, share jokes with them, talk his heart out with them… But it was not so.
"Ryou?" A hand was waving in front of his face. He glanced up to find Atemu staring at him, worriedly.
"What? Oh, I'm sorry." Ryou grinned reassuringly. "What was that?"
"You're coming, and that's final!" Yugi grabbed Ryou's arm, and began pulling him in the opposite direction.
"But—" he began hesitantly, but succumbed to Yugi pulling on him. The books were tugged out of arms. He glanced up to find Atemu's eyes twinkling. Bakura opened his mouth to speak.
"No buts. Ryou you've got to get out and have some fun!" Yugi's amethyst eyes sparkled in the dying sun. Ryou regarded Yugi, who was smiling encouragingly.
"Alright," Ryou acquiesced. Maybe this time would be different? Maybe he'd give it another try. "Sure, I can come," he stated simply.
"Alright! Even your Yami's going to be there," Ryou's heart skipped a beat. Maybe they could spend some time together? He shook his head to hear what else Yugi had to say.
"The others are already at the arcade. I think they're saving us some seats at a table. The mall's going to be packed today…"
Yugi began talking to the others, rambling on, but Ryou allowed his mind to wander freely. Ever since his father had left, he'd been afraid to make friends…Ryou shivered. But no one noticed. As they waited for the signal to turn green, he looked at the others again timidly.
Yugi was still chatting about the new shop that was opening, while Yami grinned at him. He glanced over at Seto and Joey, who were standing impossibly close…Ryou's chocolate colored eyes widened slightly. They were holding hands. Who would have thought…?
His heart ached slightly as he watched the others around him, but he pushed the uneasy feelings away. He wasn't going to feel awkward anymore, not even around his Yami. He was going to enjoy this with all of them. And nothing would stop that. He'd really try, today. He would. He raised head so that he was looking in front of him, instead of at the ground. He grinned.
However, an hour later, Ryou found himself staring at a paired-up DDR match between Yami Bakura and Marik, Yugi and Atemu, Seto and Joey, Tristan and Otogi, and Tea and Mokuba. Malik was hadn't come. Due to the odd number of people Ryou had excused himself politely.
"Ah, no you go on. It wouldn't be fair…" Of course, he would never steal the fun out of a game. He wasn't even good. They would most assuredly laugh at him. Fool. His father's voice echoed in his head. Bakabakabaka. Ryou shook his head slightly.
"Are you sure Ryou?" asked Yugi resignedly, turning to face him as he walked backwards up to the dance floor. Ryou gave a swift nod and smiled once more. He didn't want to face their guilt-filled faces, and he knew Yugi would immediately start questioning him if he let slip that he was actually quite unhappy. He had backed away slightly. He was apprehensive of what the others might think of him. He didn't dance. Not ever. Not even at the school dances. He colored slightly at the thought of tripping over his own feet, and looked down at his feet.
"DDR, here we come!" Tea shrieked, already stepping on the colored arrows to the upbeat rhythm. Ryou hesitantly watched the group score points.
Half an hour later, the guys were still at it. The group wildly stepped on the colorful arrows illuminated on the padded floor, and shrieked in joy. Loud, boisterous music assaulted his ears, and he winced slightly again.
Yami Bakura and Marik were laughing insanely, while Tea and Mokuba were doubled over as a red-faced Joey and an equally flustered Seto tumbled over their own feet and landed on the ground, scowling. Bakura's merely shook his head, and smiled slightly. He turned his attention towards Atemu and Yugi, who were both still energetically hopping to the rhythm, pink-faced and sweaty, but nevertheless happy. He watched their coordinated feet move at dizzying speeds in awe. Tristan and Otogi who were lagging behind in points, were now stomping everywhere in order to gain them back.
Ryou's heart twinged once more. He looked longingly at the group on the floor. He wished he could be with them. He wished he could let himself loose like them. He wished he could relax and laugh with them…
But he'd never be able to do that. He'd never fit in. Not even like his Yami had.
But it looked like they were having fun. They were all smiling. And laughing. Joking. He bit back a frown. A pink faced Yami would every so often turn and smile at him, but would soon be swept away by the game again. And he was left there, merely standing and watching. Standing and watching and wanting to play so badly, he knew it was childish, but still, he wanted to be amidst their group. He wanted to laugh with them. He wanted to share his thoughts with them. He wanted to show them that he was waiting behind this cracked façade for someone to notice him. For anybody to notice him. The real him. Not the quiet, wallflower, but rather the helpful and interesting teen.
But he knew he would never allow himself to open up enough.
He was too afraid, after his father. Especially after his father….
He felt utterly isolated and alone, despite the crowds that were forming around him. He heard loud whispers around him. The Game King was on the floor!
He winced as the breath was knocked out of him. An elbow had shoved him away. And he fell, tumbling to the floor. He quickly picked himself up, and surreptitiously glanced around to see if anyone was laughing. He hated that. He hated feeling humiliated. He only found a cold sneer directed at him as he scrambled away, bumping into someone else.
"G-gomen nas—" he stuttered, abashed. His face flushed. Why was he so clumsy?
"Watch it," the man hissed, and pushed past Ryou.
Ryou walked back to sit at the empty table, clenching his jaws slightly. He stared desolately at the crumpled 7-UP soda can and the rest of the cold greasy fries doused in ketchup. His headache had returned with full force.
It wasn't fair.
Tears blurred his eyes once more. No wonder he always called me weak… He wiped the tears away angrily. Angry at himself for allowing them to fall. Angry at himself for allowing his emotions to bubble out, instead of suppressing them. Angry at himself for being so weak, and friendless, and pitiful…
He crumpled a stray napkin in his pale hand, and his breath hitched in his throat. The strains of the music still blasted through the room. Echoes of laughter resonated in his ears. Bright colors flashed in front of his eyes. Throngs of people were gathered around Yugi and his friends. He smoothed the napkin out, frowning at the wrinkles in the once perfect square. That he'd ruined.
They wouldn't even notice me gone…he thought bitterly, but then remonstrated himself. Self-pity is for fools. His father's advice rang in his ears. He closed his eyes, and let his head rest on the table. It was no use. It was never any use. He was a fool to think that he could have fun with the rest of them…
"Ryou?" A voice filtered through the music to his ears. His head shot up immediately. Tea smiled breathlessly down at him.
"Hi Tea!" Bakura said brightly. Maybe they could talk, even though his own Yami wouldn't? "You were really gre—" he tried to say.
"Hey, would you mind getting me some water? I'm exhausted!" she interrupted, slumping in one of the chairs. Ryou nodded and smiled gently, and walked off to find the vending machine. He bit his lip. He enjoyed helping other people. Kami-sama knew he'd do anything to help. But still, would it be so hard for one of them to actually talk to him? To actually listen to him?
He nearly smacked himself. He was being a baka, and he knew it. He knew he didn't belong with them. He had known it from the beginning.
He slid some coins into the slot, and pressed the button for water on the machine. It wouldn't work. Puzzled, he looked up at a small paper sign taped to the machine. Out-of-Order. Ryou frowned. That was the only vending machine in here… His eyes lit up as he remembered that there was another one just across the mall. If he walked quickly…
Ryou triumphantly held the cold bottle in his hands. He knew it was silly, but he liked doing favors for people. He liked the happy reactions he was able to see on their faces. He walked to the table quickly. But it was empty.
Puzzled, Ryou looked around. He walked over to the dance floor—maybe Tea had meant for him to give it to her there?
But no, no one was at the dance floor anymore. Ryou walked swiftly back to the table and set the water bottle down. Where could they be?
He suddenly felt a vibration in his pocket.
"Moshi, moshi," he replied, picking at the brightly colored wrappers that littered the table.
"Ryou? Ryou where are you?" Yugi's voice filtered through the phone distantly.
"Hold on a second, Yugi, I can't hear you." Ryou pushed the glass doors open, and stepped outside the arcade room. He could still hear the music pulsating from inside, but outside it was a bit more bearable.
"What's up Yugi?" Ryou asked, looking around him. Maybe they were waiting outside for him somewhere.
"Where are you?"
"I'm still at the arcade. Where are you?"
He heard silence for a few seconds. He clutched the water bottle tighter, letting the cold seep in through his fingers. His hand was freezing. He could feel it pulsate.
"You're at the arcade? We thought you'd left…" Yugi's voice trailed off awkwardly.
Ryou smiled bitterly. Of course you would. Tears threatened to fall again.
He cleared his voice before speaking.
"Where are you guys?"
"Uh…we're," Yugi sounded distinctly uncomfortable. They had left him. Even his Yami. Of course. Another thing to be expected. Ryou wasn't sure why he was so disappointed. After all, he should be used to this sort of treatment by now. "We're kind of walking towards the ice cream shoppe, you know the one at the corner?"
"Oh, right…" I sat down at the nearest bench, and tugged at my hair. BakaBakaBaka
"Can you make it?"
I paused. Did I really want to go?
No.
"I'm sorry Yugi, I have a lot of homework to catch up on," Bakura answered as politely as he could.
"Oh." Yugi's voice was small. "I'm sorry Ryou, we—"
"No, no, it's quite alright," Ryou answered softly. After all. It was. Wasn't it? Bakura coughed. "I have to go now, I'm afraid. Goodbye!"
He barely heard the echo of Yugi's goodbye on the phone. He snapped it shut. He didn't want to think anymore. He just wanted to go home. Why hadn't he just gone home?
/Hikari?/
He shut the mind link off, completely.
And now the sun wasn't even out anymore, he thought, as he kicked aside a stray soda can. The aluminum rattled down the side walk ominously. Bakura shivered slightly. That meant that he would have to walk home in utter darkness. The lamp-posts on the blocks leading to his apartment weren't working—they never had. How fitting, he thought, he'd have to walk through the dark, even though he was the hikari.
A slight breeze picked up behind Ryou, who tensed. The hair on his neck prickled uncomfortably. Something was behind him. Before he could react, something tackled him to the ground. Pain exploded in his temple, and he moaned. What the?
The water bottle fell from his nerveless fingers.
He felt himself being dragged to one of the corner alleys. No… Ryou tried to wriggle out of his captor's grasp, but couldn't. Every time he moved, pain assaulted him, and he gagged. When he tired, he felt hot fingers trail down his temple, to his cheeks, to his lips. He trembled violently. He wanted OUT. This…this couldn't be happening. Not to him. No. NO.
A sharp slap to his cheek stopped his whimpering. He slowly opened his eyes to find a huge man leering over him. He tried to curl within himself, but found that his limbs were pinned under the massive man. Alcohol reeked from the man's breath. Bakura held his breath, and bit his tongue.
"I want youuu….Pretty booooy." The man's speech was slurred. Bakura whimpered.
Pretty boy? Maybe this was all he was good for. Maybe this was it.
Tears leaked out of Ryou's eyes, but he struggled no longer. Resistance was useless. It was a lesson learned long, long ago.
He tilted his head up. Why were the stars so brightly splattered across the inky black sky? They looked so lonely up there.
He felt more fingers trail down to his shirt, and rip it open, buttons flying everywhere. Bakura tried to keep still. This was it…This was it…
BakaBakaBaka
You pathetic little brat.
Brother, don't leave me!
I hate you. You killed her.
Bastard.
Slap.
Cold.
He was so bitterly, so mind numbingly, so utterly cold.
He had never been this cold before in his life.
Hot breaths in his face choked him. The heavy body above ground against him. Shock and terror flooded the teen's eyes. This was real.
Get out!
But Papa, please!
Damn you, child!
Slap.
Crash.
I told you to stay. Out. Of. My. Way.
Yes Papa.
Slowly, Ryou closed his eyes .
Yield.
His pants were yanked downwards.
He felt something distinctly not his.
He felt fingers everywhere.
Fingers that slid where he didn't want them…
Didn't want them…
Didn't want…
Didn't…
"HEY!" a voice roared down the alleyway. An oddly familiar voice. Bakura just couldn't place it. "GET THE HELL AWAY FROM HIM!"
Ryou suddenly felt the weight shoved off of his body. He instinctively curled up into a ball, clutching at his arms.
He was so cold…
Dizziness swallowed him into its abyss. He tried to crack open his eyes, but the pain stopped him. Why wouldn't everything stop spinning? He thought.
He thought he heard some scuffling. And then silence. Bakura couldn't stand it. He slit his eye open a bit.
What had happened?
Was this real?
He looked at the slumped body in front of him.
He began breathing quickly. He tried slowing down, but he couldn't.
In. Out.
InOut
Inout
Inoutinout.
His chest was exploding. He felt so cold. He clenched his hair in pain. He backed up against the wall, and struggled to breathe. He arched his neck upwards. Air. He needed air.
Inoutinoutinoutinout.
He couldn't hear the footsteps pounding down the alleyway. He couldn't feel the comforting embrace he was pulled into. He couldn't hear the roars of fury, or the shrieks of anguish or the bold threats. Darkness surrounded him, until…
"Hikari?" A voice, disembodied, slightly out of breath, reached his ears. He could hear something.
"Did you see!"
"He wasn't even moving!"
"He wasn't even trying!"
"Dammit, what the hell—"
"Shh, I think he's waking up—"
He licked his lips. He tasted something metallic.
"Hikari?"
"Guys, stop crowding around him—"
It was funny, he hadn't tasted this in a while.
"Ryou?"
It tasted a lot like blood.
"Hikari?"
Who was calling him so insistently? Why couldn't they just leave him alone?
"Open your eyes, hikari…That's it…"
Ryou cracked open his eyes. The starry sky met him. His old friend. He smiled gently. The stars winked at him, a bit more warmly this time. He could see.
A face moved into his vision.
He flinched. But he fell back against someone's strong arms. His breath hitched in his chest, and he whimpered. More figures came into his view. But their faces were oddly distorted, but vaguely familiar.
"Oh, hikari…" A voice breathed in his ear.
He was pulled into an embrace. He stiffened for a moment, then relaxed against the other's chest. He shifted so that the other teen's Ring wouldn't dig into his skin. The voices sounded so familiar.
Thump thump. Thump thump. Thump thump. He could feel.
He pressed himself against the other.
Thump thump thump thump. Thump thump thump thump.
There. Ryou smiled, satisfied. He could feel.
And he wasn't cold anymore.
One week later:
"Yami!" Bakura woke up, sweating. His covers had twisted around his body. He struggled.
"Hikari!" his Yami burst into the room, and encompassed the hikari into a hug. "Hush, hikari. I'm here now...I won't let anything hurt you hikari. That's a promise."
Bakura's sobs were muffled in his Yami's shirt. He was trembling.
"Hey," his Yami tried, sqeezing his side gently. "Hey." He placed his finger under Bakura's chin, and lifted his face. Tears glittered in his eyes, a bit like stars Yami thought. He brought his fingers towards Bakura's face slowly, and wiped his tears away. Bakura stared at him with terror-filled eyes. But he was calming down. His Yami rubbed small circles on his back.
He knew how much this hurt his hikari.
But no matter what. He'd be there for him. Why?
"I love you hikari," he murmured, capturing Ryou in a sweet kiss.
A month later:
"Yami?"
"Hikari?" Yami Bakura snuggled deeper into the covers. "Sleepy," he moaned. He shifted a bit.
"Yami?"
"Hikariii, five more minutes..." Yami Bakura complained.
Ryou smiled. He leaned down and captured his Yami's lips in a soft kiss. He wanted to feel.
Mersedes says hi, and hugs all of her readers. Thanks!
Please review.
You know you want to.
Come on. It'll only take a second.
You've spent this much time reading this part, so why not press that little purple button?
I'd really appreciate it. : - )