Author's notes: Like the last fic I submitted, this was written for the fanfic100 challenge. I'm not quite as happy with this one; the perspective is all over the place; but the concept amuses me.

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"Wow, Strong Bad, you picked a great place to go for lunch today!" said Homestar, looking around.

Strong Bad also looked around, then sighed. "Homestar, this is Marshmallow's Last Stand. We eat here every week!"

"Oh," said Homestar. "Oh yeah."

"In fact, I think this might be the only restaurant in town," continued Strong Bad.

Homestar tried to remember what he'd wanted to talk to Strong Bad about. He was halfway through wishing that he had a longer attention span when he forgot what he was wishing. So he concentrated on trying to remember that instead.

"Oh yeah," he said at last. "Hey Strong Bad, my dad called, and we're going on a father-son fishing trip tomorrow! Isn't that great?"

"Uh... I guess..." said Strong Bad, looking uncomfortable. He took a small bite out of the ketchup covered marshmallow he'd ordered.

"So... Do you ever go on father-son outings with your dad?" added Homestar.

"No."

"Father-son video game playings?"

"No!"

"How 'bout father... daughter looking and a thing in a bags?"

"What?" said Strong Bad. "No! I don't even know who my dad is! I'd give anything to go on a father-son whatever!"

Homestar chuckled. "Strong Bro, you are missing out. I mean, I know who my dad is, and look how great I turned out!"

Strong Bad took a drink of his thickshake. "Yeah, you sure turned out to be a intelligence and well adjusted young... whatever you are."

"Thanks, Strong Bad!" said Homestar, completely missing the sarcasm. "So... Was your mom on 'beginner's mode', and that's why you don't know who your dad is?"

"Beginn Are you calling my mom easy?" demanded Strong Bad, leaning forward.

"Uh, I guess so," said Homestar. "I know who your dad is, and I'm not even your mom!"

Strong Bad, who'd been ready to strangle Homestar, leaned back again. "You do?"

"Yeah," said Homestar. "I'm your dad!"

"What?!"

"And by the way Strong Bad, your mom is totally on beginner's mode," said Homestar.

Strong Bad didn't believe Homestar. At all. "Aren't you the same age as I am?"

"I guess not," said Homestar. He held up a photo. "Here's a picture of me holding the new arrival!"

Strong Bad snatched the photo and inspected it. It depicted Homestar Runner holding a baby with Strong Bad's distinctive facial features. Strong Bad stared for a second, then dropped the photo like it'd given him a papercut.

"And here's your birth certificate," added Homestar, giving him a birth certificate.

"Why do you have my birth certificate?" said Strong Bad, taking it and staring at it in confusion. "Holy crap! You are my dad!"

Homestar frowned. "What, didn't you believe me, Strong Bad?"

"Why didn't you ever say anything?" said Strong Bad, a little hysterically.

"What are you talking about? I say stuff all the"

"About being my dad!"

"Oh," said Homestar. "That. Well... You never asked."

"And how come I'm so awesome, and you're so lame?" added Strong Bad, finishing off his marshmallow.

"Strong Bad, aren't you related to Strong Sad?" said Homestar, furrowing his brow. "But you did inherent my love for ketchup covered marshmallows! And star shirts."

Strong Bad looked at the remains of his lunch. "I am never having this meal ever again."

"So..." said Homestar, leaning forward. "Wanna go on a father-son outing day after tomorrow?"

"Yes!" said Strong Bad, then reconsidered. "No! Maybe! Yes!"

"That's great, son!" said Homestar. "I can teach you how to spit Teddy Grahams on your roof and pour soda on your computer!"

"Son?!" said Strong Bad. "Never call me that ever again."

"But that's what you are!" said Homestar.

"Let me see that birth certificate again..." said Strong Bad, as Homestar held it out of his reach.