Transatlanticism
Characters: Ryan & Marissa
Summary: Marissa comes home from her trip to Greece. One-shot.
A/N: Kind of an epilogue to Trying to Replace You, but the only think thats important here is they were together when she left to go.
Taking long, deep breaths, she stares up at the seemingly towering building before her, trying to calm the nerves that are making her stomach do cartwheels inside her. It's freezing out and she can see the stars glisten and shine down as the rows of square windows form patterns of bright light and complete darkness. He doesn't know she's coming, and suddenly she's even more nervous than before as she wonders if his room is one of the dark ones. A year and a half has been way too long to be away from him, she cant stand to think of being away from him even a minute longer.
Holding her chin high, she pushes past the few students huddled near the entrance and makes her way through the heavy door and onto the stairs, slowly making her way up to the fourth floor to find dorm number 407, where all the letters she's sent him have been addressed.
As the stairs creak beneath her sneakers, she comes to the conclusion that she's never wanted anything in her life as much as she wants to see him, and hug him, and kiss right now. She needs him so bad it physically hurts to think of all the time she's spent away from him; to think of how in the almost three semesters he's been attending school here, she's never once even stepped in this town. He has this whole new life now and she's completely terrified that she won't fit. They've talked every Sunday night for hours on end for over the past seventy weeks, but as she closer and closer to his room, she's suddenly scared out of her mind that he might not actually care anymore, or want to see her, and that showing up out of the blue might catch him off guard, or with another girl. She briefly considers leaving, checking into a hotel, and lying to say she's coming in a few days to give him time to prepare, but all of the sudden she's run out of stairs and she's on the top floor, his floor, and she doesn't think her heart can take it if she turns around now.
She looks down the dim hallway to see a few stray boys, two of them arguing loudly about football while another sits dumbly and bounces a ball repeatedly against the wall ahead of him. She catches a glance from one, but pays it no mind and she walks down the hall, her eyes focused on the passing room numbers as if her life depends on it. Then she sees it; 407. Her heart pounds in her chest so loud she can hear it in her ears and somehow feel it against her ribs as she stops in front of it. One quick deep breath as she counts to five, trying to desperately not be so nervous and excited and scared, and she knocks on the door.
She waits, biting her lip so hard it hurts, but nothing happens. She knocks harder this time, hoping she just wasn't heard, but still nothing. Looking to her feet in defeat, she can clearly see a warm yellow light inside and something immediately tells her he's there. Without another thought, her hand reaches out and slowly twists the handle and she holds her breath as it gently creaks open.
What she sees makes her freeze in the doorway.
Her immediate urge is to attack him with hugs, and her next one is to cry, but she does neither. Instead she smiles, a huge, warm grin that takes up her whole face, as she steps inside the room and quietly shuts the door behind her. She slips off her shoes, and then her jacket, and sets her bag aside, before crossing the small space to stand at his bedside. Carefully, she takes his study materials off his comforter, making sure to mark every page he left them open to, and set them aside before crawling on top of the blankets and laying down next to him, facing him, where he must have drifted off from a very boring study session.
She lies completely straight, making sure to keep a few inches between them, so that they're not touching, but she's sure she can feel him still. Wide-eyed, she stares at him, trying to place everything she's missed change in him in a year and a half. At first, she thinks he looks old, but then she realizes he just looks so much more grown up, like the teenager she left behind had changed into a man overnight. He has stubble and his hair is longer and untamed in a way she hasn't seen it before. He seems bigger, more muscular if that's even possible, and maybe even a little bit taller, but most of all he seems like he's got a bigger presence, even in his sleep, than he did before.
Her fingers itch to touch him and hold him, but she doesn't want to wake him up because she can see his eyes moving beneath their lids and she knows he's dreaming. She wonders if she's there at all as she shifts a little bit closer, close enough to feel his breath on her cheek and his body heat on her skin.
Without any warning at all, his eyelids flutter open, going from drowsy to wide awake in what seems like a split second as recognition seems to dawn on him. She sighs and smiles as she realizes he doesn't look so different after all as deep blue stares into deep blue, and waits for him to ask her how she's there or why she's back so soon; but the questions never come. Instead, he reaches out and touches the tip top of her freckled nose, as if to check that she's real, before sweeping his fingers across her cheek and then tangling them in her golden locks.
"Marissa.."
He breathes it out like a question and that's all it takes for her to cross the small distance she'd created between them. She curls her arms around him as best she can and rests her forehead against his chest as he holds her tight to him. She breaks a little and a few stay tears fall down her face and land on his t-shirt. Suddenly she doesn't know how she survived all this time away from him, or how she even left in the first place.
"I missed you," she simply confesses in a mumble against him as she snuggles even closer. She's not sure how long they stay like that, but it feels like forever before he moves his fingers up her side and she feels his lips kiss her hair.
She pulls back just the slightest bit to see him absolutely beaming at her, his eyes searching her like he's a little confused and a lot in awe. For a moment she feels like she should say something, like they need to talk and catch up before anything else, but they've spent countless hours on the phone over the past year and a half, and words suddenly feel like a waste of this moment. Leaning in, she keeps her eyes on his as she places a lingering but chaste kiss on his soft lips, her heart pounding. Slowly, she pulls back and sees his grin fade into seriousness, and he's looking at her so intense that she blushes and her fingers curl into the fabric of his shirt.
He leans in and kisses her in the exact same way, holding her gaze, and rests his forehead against hers. "I love you," he whispers huskily, and her heart suddenly swells and fills up so fast she can't even think.
She quickly takes his lips in hers hungrily and kisses him with all she's got. Her hands find their way to the tiny curled hairs on the back of his neck and his find their way to her waist as he matches her intensity and eases her onto her back. Her mind and body go crazy as he lies on top of her, kissing her, tasting her, and touching her, and all she wants is more of him; she needs all of him. She curls her feet around his legs and moans as he presses up against her, making her body flush with warmth and her stomach do a flip.
"Ryan?" she mumbles against his lips and he stops and hovers above her, watching her anxiously. She smiles softly, reaching up and touching his cheek, his stubble ticking her fingers. "I love you too," she tells him honestly, because she knows in that moment that he means more to her than anyone in the whole world and she's pretty positive there's no way she could ever love anyone else this much ever.
He grins down at her and kisses her softly, sweetly, before everything suddenly became faster and more impassioned. Their hands explore and their mouths taste what seems like every inch of each other as their clothes melt away. He grunts and she moans as they twist in the sheets of his twin sized dorm bed, making up for all the time they've spent apart. And as they move together, she realizes she still fits with him, and that's all that really matters.
&&&&&&&&&
Breathing hard against his scarf, he smiles to himself as he watches her stick out her tongue and try to catch the slowly falling snowflakes as she spins around in the oversized winter coat of his she is wearing. He reaches out as she stops and holds her delicate, pink mitten clad hand in his and studies her face, noticing and adoring tiny details he'd missed the night before. Her hair is shorter and has what seems like ten different shades of blonde and gold, her skin is glowing with a tan and her freckles look darker and still just as cute, but she looks different in a way that's beyond all that, that he really can't explain. She smiles back and squeezes his hand and he's so content in that moment he's not sure what to do.
"I can't believe you're here."
She laughs to herself and snuggles into his side. "So I surprised you, huh?"
"Yeah, you definitively surprised me," he admits before shaking his head absently. "You should have told me you were coming. I would have picked you up from the airport and we could have gone out to dinner or done something special."
She shakes her head, a huge grin on her face, and he can feel his stomach flip. "I wouldn't change anything about last night."
A goofy smile curls his lips, because if he really thinks about it, he wouldn't change anything either. He pulls her against his side as they begin walking again, slowly making their way across campus, before burying a quick kiss in her hair. "So what happens now?"
She bites her lip and shrugs in a way he can't quite read, but her eyes brighten and twinkle and he hopes she has some good news. He doesn't think he can handle hearing her say she's going back to her dad's boat again anytime soon. "I'm going back to Newport for Christmas next week, and I was kind of hoping that in the mean time we could spend some time together until your done with finals, and maybe… you could help me find an apartment?"
"What?" he blurts as he comes to an abrupt stop, because there's no way he just heard her right. He turns to meet her bright blue eyes and is in complete awe as he sees her smiling so wide at him, he thinks her face must hurt.
"Well, I was going to stay in a dorm, but they told me there wasn't any available, especially on such short notice… So I need a place to live before the semester starts."
"You're staying?" he mutters in shock and disbelief as his lips start to curl, "You're staying forever?"
He watches as she shakes her head up and down enthusiastically, and he swears his heart skips a beat. She quickly opens her mouth to say something more, but he cuts her off with a kiss, hard and warm, because he just can't believe it. He can't believe how it's all suddenly coming together, and how easily they suddenly work, and he can't remember the last time he was so happy, or he smiled so much, or if the two of them ever have smiled so much together. It seems almost too easy and too perfect, since nothing has ever been that way for them before, but for some reason it feels so right that, for the first time since they've been together, he has no doubts.
He pushes her against a cold brick building just off the sidewalk and can feel her shiver against him as he pulls away.
"I love you," she confesses softly, her nose and cheeks bright red with cold and her hair speckled with snowflakes, "and I promise I'll never to leave you again."
Without a second thought, he leans in and kisses her again, slowly, sweetly, grinning as he pulls away and rests his forehead against hers. "Good."