Poor little mind reader: The final chapter
AN: Hi all, this is the last chapter of poor little mind reader, I hope you like it, I would like to thank all of the people who have read anything I have written
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Poor little mind reader, Clutzy Mcgee and Awesome Em.
Carlisle: Where are the contestents? We're starting in five minutes.
Esme: I don't know Carlisle, last time I saw Emmett he was in a red wet suit.
Carlisle: Wet suit?
Esme: Don't ask, I don't know.
Alice: Where the hell are Edward, Bella and Emmett?
Carlisle: I don't know, they need to hurry up, we're starting.
Jasper: The Volturi is getting antsy, they've requested a snack.
Alice: Go fetch Mike Newton.
Carlisle: No, tell them to hold their horses, the others will be here in a minute.
(Edward, Bella and Emmett show up)
Esme: Emmett, what on earth are you wearing?
Emmett: I'm a lobster.
Carlisle: Oh dear.
Edward: Relax, it will help.
Carlisle: Fine, just go out.
(They went out)
Carlisle: In this cor- What on earth are you wearing, Aro?
Aro: I'm a banana.
Carlisle: Right, anyway. In this corner we have: Aro, Jane and Caius.
In that corner we have: Poor little mind reader, Clutzy McGee and Awesome Em.
Jane whispers to Aro: Why didn't we get nick-names?
Aro: I didn't think about it.
Carlisle: Begin!
Jane:
You got me trippin oh, stumbling oh, flippin oh,
fumbling oh
Clumsy cuz I'm fallin in love, in love
You got me
slippin oh, tumbling oh, sinking oh, fumbling oh
Clumsy cuz I'm
fallin in love, in love
So in love with you
Can't help
it
The girl can't help it oh baby
Can't help it
The girl
can't help it oh baby
Can't help it
The girl can't help it oh
baby
Can't help it
Edward: Boo!
Bella: Jitterbug
Edward: Jitterbug
Emmett: Jitterbug
Bella: Jitterbug
Edward:
You put the boom-boom into my heart
You send my soul
sky high when your lovin' starts
Jitterbug into my brain
Goes a
bang-bang-bang 'til my feet do the same
But something's bugging
you
Something ain't right
My best friend told me what you did
last night
Left me sleepin' in my bed
I was dreaming, but I
should have been with you instead.
Bella:
Wake me up before you go-go
Don't leave me hanging
on like a yo-yo
Wake me up before you go-go
I don't want to
miss it when you hit that high
Wake me up before you go-go
'Cause
I'm not plannin' on going solo
Wake me up before you go-go
Take
me dancing tonight
I wanna hit that high (yeah, yeah)
Jane: Ow, it burns!
Caius: Who let the dogs out
Jane and Aro: (woof, woof, woof, woof)
Caius: Who let the dogs out
Jane and Aro: (woof, woof, woof, woof)
Caius:
When the party was nice, the party was jumpin' (Hey,
Yippie, Yi, Yo)
And everybody havin' a ball (Hah, ho, Yippie Yi
Yo)
I tell the fellas "start the name callin'" (Yippie
Yi Yo)
And the girls report to the call
The poor dog show down
Jane: Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)
Aro: Who let the dogs out (woof, woof, woof, woof)
Bella: Oh it hurts so bad!
Edward:
I like it when the beat goes da na da na
Baby make
your booty go da na da na
Girl I know you wanna show da na da
na
That thong th thong thong thong
I like it when the beat goes
da na da na
Baby make your booty go da na da na
Girl I know you
wanna show da na da na
That thong th thong thong thong
Jane:
Upside, inside out she's livin la vida loca
She'll
push and pull you down, livin la vida loca
Her lips are devil red
and her skin's the color mocha
She will wear you out livin la
vida loca Come On!
Livin la vida loca, Come
on!
She's livin la vida loca.
Bella: Ricky Martin off?
Aro: Sure.
Caius:
She bangs, she bangs
Oh baby when she moves, she
moves
I go crazy 'cause she
Looks like a flower
But she
stings like a bee
Like every girl in history
She bangs, she
bangs
I'm wasted by the way she moves
No one ever looked so
fine
She reminds me
That a woman's got one thing on her mind
Emmett:
Hola Amiga, Hola Amiga
You're my temple of
desire
WE'll go around the world in a day
Don't say no,
no
Shake it my way, oh
Shake your bon-bon
Shake your
bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon
You're a Mata Hari
I wanna
know your story
In the Sahara sun
I wanna be the one
That's
gonna come and take you,
make you
Shake your bon-bon
Shake
your bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon
Up in the Himalayas
C'mon I
wanna lay ya
We'll go around the world in a day
Don't say no,
no
Shake it my way, oh
Shake your bon-bon
Shake your
bon-bon
Shake your bon-bon
Aro:
One, two , three four, five
everybody in the car so
come on let's ride
To the liqueur-store around the corner,
the
boys say they want some gin and juice
but I really don't
wanna
beerbust like I had last week
I must stay deep 'cause
talk is a cheap
I like Angela, Pamela, Sandra and Rita
and as I
continue you know they're gettin' sweeter
so what can I do I
really beg you my Lord
to me flirtin' it's just like a
sport
anything fly it's all good let me dump it
please set in
the trumpet
a little bit of Monica in my life
a little bit
of Erica by my side
a little bit of Rita is all I need
a little
bit of Tina is what I see
a little bit of Sandra in the sun
a
little bit of Mary all night long
a little bit of Jessica here I
am
a little bit of you makes me your man
Emmett: I think I should do it now.
Edward: Not yet.
Aro: I think I should do it now.
Caius: Not yet.
Bella: I know a song that get's on everybody's nerves everybody's nerves everybody's nerves and this is how it goes.
(Complete silence)
Bella: I know a song that get's on everybody's nerves everybody's nerves everybody's nerves and this is how it goes.
(Complete silence)
Bella: I know a song that get's on everybody's nerves everybody's nerves everybody's nerves and this is how it goes.
(complete silence)
Bella: I know a song that get's on everybody's nerves everybody's nerves everybod-
Caius: Oh my god, stop!
Bella: Told you.
Jane:
When I dance they call me macarena
and the boys
they say that I´m buena
they all want me, they can´t
have me
So they all come and dance beside me
move with me jam
with me
and if your good i take you home with me
A la
tuhuelpa legria macarena
Que tuhuelce paralla legria cosabuena
A
la tuhuelpa legria macarena Eeeh, macarena
(everyone in the room does the macarena)
Bella: Now Emmett.
Emmett:
We were at a party
His ear lobe fell in the deep
Someone reached in and grabbed it
It was a rock lobster
We
were at the beach
Everybody had matching towels
Somebody went
under a dock
And there they saw a rock
It wasn't a rock
It
was a rock lobster
Motion in the ocean
His air hose broke
Lots of trouble
Lots of bubble
He was in a jam
S'in a
giant clam
Down, down
Underneath the waves
Mermaids
wavin'
Wavin' to mermen
Wavin' sea fans
Sea horses
sailin'
Dolphins wailin'
Red snappers snappin'
Clam
shells clappin'
Muscles flexin'
Flippers flippin'
Jane: Oh god NOOO!!!
Caius: Now Aro!
Aro: It's peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time, peanut butter jelly time
Where he at
Where he at
Where he at
Where he at
There he go
There he go
There he go
There he go
Peanut butter jelly
Peanut butter jelly
Peanut butter jelly
Peanut butter jelly
Do
the peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly,
Peanut butter jelly
with a baseball bat
Do
the peanut butter jelly, peanut butter jelly,
Peanut butter jelly
with a baseball bat
Bella: Oh god make it stop!
Edward: Bella! Bella!
(Bella wakes up in her bedroom)
Bella: What happened?
Edward: You slept a really long time, you kept singing really annoying songs, then you started screaming
so I woke you up.
Bella: It was horrible, it all started with your family torturing you with annoying songs in their heads, then it turned into a competition.
Edward: You have a very creative imagination.
Bella: I'm just glad it's over.
(Edward goes home)
Emmett's
thought's: Goodbye my lover
Goodbye my friend
You
have been the one
You have been the one for me
I am a
dreamer and when I wake
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams
you take
And as you move on, remember me
Remember us and all we
used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile
Edward: Oh no! It's happening!!
The End