Chapter 12

After walking around for a few hours, scaring off some countless random little children in the park the livid look on his face, Kai cooled off just a little bit and after a long and persistant argument with Dranzer he chose to take the long route home. The home he shared with Tori.

The walk home was long and painful. He couldn't believe that he'd broken up with her, or at least given her that impression. He didn't really…entirely feel that way. He didn't want to continue this way but he didn't want to leave her either. He wasn't quite sure what he was going to find when he got home; he was sure that it wasn't going to be something pleasant, Tori was probably a nervous wreck and he didn't know how he was going to restore the damage they'd caused for each other.

He opened the door quietly when he got there, eyes on the ground which then followed all the keys and coins that got caught under the door when he tried to open it a little further. He got in and shut it, his eyes following the trail of blood in the kitchen and seeing the pile of medication there on the ground which caused millions of thoughts to rush to his already aching head. "Tori?" He checked the living room in a hurry, then the bathroom, the spare bedroom and their…her bedroom. "Tori sweetie…" he ran over to her, kneeling on the ground and checking the box of pill beside her, "Tori, wake up." He shook her slightly, attempting to wake her and hoping that the pills weren't used for what he was thinking.

To his utter relief she opened her eyes and her body stretched out from it's rolled up form just slightly, "Kai…" Tears poured out of her eyes and her arms latched around his neck but he pushed her away slightly.

"How much of these did you take?" he held up the box from the nightstand.

"Just four." She buried her face into the pillow to wipe her tears off.

"And how many are you meant to take at a time?"

"Two usually but…"

"Tori!"

"You need to take four if you plan on taking the surgery…"

He felt like he'd gone deaf for a second, only being able to feel his heart beating fast in his chest, at first from fright, until it stopped at her words and started up again with the same speed, "What?"

"I called the hospital…they can fit me in for surgery late tomorrow night but I was…" He saw her raise a hand to her mouth, coughing hard against it until he rubbed her back to soothe her so that could continue, "meant to be there about half an hour ago. They offered to send an ambulance but I said I'd walk it 'cause I needed the fresh air." She placed both hands to grip her head, pushing her hair back out of her flushed face, "I'm so stupid I fell asleep."

Kai brushed the tears off her cheeks, smiling ever so slightly, "You're not stupid."

"Shit Kai." Tori mumbled, pushing past him and running out of the room.

He got up and followed her to the bathroom, watching her bent over the toilet, both hands against the wall as she began retching hard. He could very well guess the reasons for this reaction because it was the exact same way he felt when he had been suffering from his nightmares and unfortunately, there wasn't much he was able to do but stand by his beloved and help her recover. Entering the bathroom he placed a glass of water onto the ceramic contrivance above the sink and then stepped to the shivering figure who had gotten onto her knees on the floor, crouching down next to it and laying a hand onto the small back and stroking it soothingly, feeling the surges wrecking the fragile body.

How he wished he could take that hurt, that misery and suffering off the slender shoulders onto his own, endure Tori's pain instead of the younger for it certainly wouldn't hurt as much as being forced to simply stand by and watch the events taking their terrible effects on his girlfriend, offering all the support, warmth, care and protection he could come up with and help his beloved to cope. He found it unfair that she'd been suffering with these things for so long. He assumed to her dealing with the compulsive vomiting, stomach aches, migraines and all the rest by herself but especially a girl like her, as sweet and as innocent as her, needed some taking care of and he'd neglected to do that for her because he assumed that she could handle herself.

Her hair had begun to get in her way so he pulled it off her face and kept it behind her on her back, holding onto her arm gently as she moved forward quickly another time. For her breakfast had been rather sparse and lunch had clearly been skipped all together the only thing Tori could do after some moments was retch dryly, nothing left to spit out but still it was like her consciousness, her heart tried to vomit the very memories, every single one, out of her mind forever and even though not succeeding in that tried on and on and on, until she felt her chest and stomach hurting violently, forcing tears into her already-crying eyes. It was hard to even try and inhale sobbing breaths in between the fits of nausea so by the time it was finally over she was totally drained, reaching her badly trembling fingers out to flush the toilet.

He caught her hand in time though, moving it back down to her side and flushing the toilet himself. He picked her up off the ground, allowing her to rest against him and holding onto her waist as she cleaned her mouth and teeth at the sink. She then staggered right past him, pushing out of his hold, "Kai, don't be here out of guilt or pity."

"I'm not." He moved over to her and picked her up like he would a toddler, balancing her on his strong arm with his other arm around her waist and stroking her back. He took her to the kitchen and leant back against the counter and handing her a glass of water, at the moment forgetting about the one he'd brought her in the bathroom. Once she was done he walked back to the front door, careful not to step in the blood.

"Where are we going?" She asked sleepily, resting against his shoulder.

"To the hospital." Kai made it down the stairs in a hurry, considering he was still carrying her. He put her down on the ground at her insistence, "I'll come back for some of your things later."

Within the next hour things had slowed down. The whole day was a rushed pace, waking up, quick kisses between them, rushing to the airport with Bryan and Tala, coming back and having the heated argument with Tori, leaving and walking around for ages. Now he could look back and they seemed like things that happened a long time ago. Things were a little calmer. She was curled up in the hospital bed, one arm hanging off the edge of the bed as it had countless drips attached. She looked so weak and fragile to him, he knew she didn't want him to see her like that and he had never quite understood why she didn't want him visiting the first time around and now he understood; she was so ashamed about the way she looked when in this state, she wasn't her confident self and was scared that he'd leave her or be disgusted by her.

"So why'd you change your mind again?" he asked curiously, entwining his hand with hers.

"I didn't want to die spending my last month alone, no family, no boyfriend." She mumbled exhaustedly, "There's a chance that the surgery will kill me…it's why I didn't want it in the first place two years ago. At least if I die tomorrow night…well at least I can remember how nice you were about it, helping me out and bringing me here."

"You won't die. You're strong, I know you are. You'll pull through just like you have the other times."

He caught the strange look on her face, a confused look, just before it disappeared and she buried half her face in the pillow, "How can you have so much faith in the me? I'm as weak as they come…I can barely handle myself and…"

"You can't handle yourself? You're handling things very well considering everything. You went through a lot because you dealt with this for years…you're bound to feel like you're giving up eventually. You tried to be strong for as long as you could, now you're just tired of it."

"I wish I were as strong as you, Kai." He heard her mumbling softly.

He sighed and leant forward, "I'm not that strong…and you know as well as I do that the strength I actually have gets me in trouble." He saw her smile lightly at the way he said that, he was right after all. "This is just one of those things that you and I will argue about till we're both dead. You know how things are between us; sometimes there are things we just never come to a decent conclusion to, or we just never agree. This will be one of those things because who is stronger is undecided."

"Kai…I don't want you to see me till I recover from the surgery."

"That's not going to happen. I'm going to be here this time and you're not going to change my mind."

"I don't want you to be here if I survive the surgery."

Kai stood up and pulled the blankets over her a little more and tightening them so she wouldn't be able to move too much, "I'm going to be here, you're not going to manage talking me into not being here so save your strength." He pressed his cool lips to her forehead. He loved doing that, to any man it was the perfect expression of love and it always had been. It was a sign of affection when a girl was sick, when she was worried, when she was hurt, it was even a traditional thing to do after lovemaking in Japan. He loved how he could smell the beautiful scent of her hair and skin when he kissed her there, he loved how if he moved away fast enough he could see the red in her cheeks.

He sat back down in the chair by the bed, his grip on her hand tightening as a reminder that he wasn't going anywhere far. He could see her slowly going to sleep, she clearly didn't want to but she needed to.

--Two Days Later--

"So Kai, how is she?" Max asked seriously, moving closer to him on the front porch.

"Well she survived…which is a plus. She's weak right now, really tired. She's not allowed to have visitors just yet since she's only been out of surgery a few hours but they say she'll be okay."

"Tori's a strong girl, I knew she'd be okay." Tyson said hurriedly.

Kai could hear Ray settle down beside him, exhaling heavily, "You think they'll let us visit her later?"

He shook his head hurriedly, "Tori's not keen on even having me there either. She doesn't want to see anyone. I've already warned the nurse that I'll be there to see her later and that I will be there regardless of what Tori tells them but I guess now I'll see what happens."

"The worst is over Kai, just relax." Max whispered, almost ashamed that he was the one having to calm Kai down when it should've been Tori.

"I'm perfectly relaxed." Kai bit out angrily.

"Kai, we haven't seen you this stressed out since the time you set us all down with Tori to tell us about your nightmares and stuff." Ray, the usual voice of reason, pointed out.

"Yeah, and you were really stressed out back then too." Tyson said, always pointing out the obvious.

"Thanks loads, Tyson. Remind me to never come to you with a problem."

"So if you go see her today, will you call us and tell us how she is and if she'll see us?" Max asked an obvious question, just to get Kai's mind off their loudmouth friend.

"Sure." Kai hurried off the porch, "I'm going for a short walk before I go see her."

"You want us to come with you?"

"No." Kai walked out the Dojo gate after that, leaving behind his concerned friends.

"Poor Kai, he's taking this hard." Ray sighed, sitting back down.

"Well yeah, his girlfriend would much rather die than keep dating him, or living with him for that matter." Tyson mumbled, gaining two deadly glares from the other two.

Max sighed a little and lay back on the wooden porch, "Clearly they didn't break up Tyson and if they did, then they both still love each other. We all know that the only person that could get Tori to change her mind about surgery was Kai and still is. Tori is the only person who could upset Kai this much, and she's the only person who can get him out of it too."

"I guess you're right."

Ray sat there, staring at his two friends for a few moments while thinking hard for something sensible and comforting to come to mind. Nothing came though. "I just hope Tori's okay. Kai is worried and hurt by all this but…he understands which makes it easier on the both of them but Tori…she's been doing this countless times and it's not just bad for her health…what about her self-esteem?"

"We'll make her feel better once we see her. I'm sure she could do with some cheering up…"

"She needs time…they both need time to sort things out. We need to give them some space, but we need to try to help the both of them out."

"Definitely."

--An Hour Later- With Kai--

Kai stepped in front of the door to Tori's room, just as a nurse stepped up beside him. "How is she?"

"Recovering well, as expected."

He peeked in through the small window of the door, seeing the lump under the sheets, "Can I see her?"

The nurse bit the inside of her cheek clearly, nodding slightly, "You can but…approach with caution, she's not been feeling too well today, post-surgery nausea mostly so she hasn't been in the best of moods."

"The 'can I see her?' answer gave me more than the 'how is she?' answer did." Kai mumbled a little irritably, "I can handle the mood swings, if she isn't too well I'll try not to be too long either." He stepped inside, shutting the door tight behind him, "Tori?" he saw the body beneath the sheets curl up even tighter, the sheets stretching further as she tugged them more over her head with her grip on them strengthening. He walked up beside her bed, turning her over onto her back through the sheets, "Come on sweetie, let go." He tugged a little at the sheets, hoping she'd stop holding on so stiffly.

"Kai, go away!"

"I'm not going anywhere, so you can either come out from under the covers by yourself or I can drag you out. It really is your choice."

"Leave me alone!"

Kai pulled an arm around her back in between the thick sheets and mattress, bringing her into a seated position and tugging the blankets off. She continued to kick, scream and sometimes scratch, curling up in her seated position and shielding her injured head from him. He didn't ever think that her confidence was ever this low.

Right now he didn't care. He just pulled his arms around her protectively and holding her cold form to his warmer body. She sobbed into his clothing, her arms still held over her head. He pushed one of them aside, kissing the top of her bandaged head, careful not to press down too hard.

"I told you not to see me." Tori murmured brokenly.

Kai made her lie down again, placing the covers back over her and holding them hard in place by her sides so she wouldn't go back under them, "Look at me."

"No."

"Please? Just look at me."

Tori pried her arms off, tucking them beneath the covers where she clutched at the mattress, bit hard on her lip that had begun to bleed from the pressure and brushed her damp cheeks against the pillow. "What do you want?" she mumbled.

"To see that pretty face of yours." As corny as that sounded it made her smile a little, he kissed her cheek lightly before brushing the tears off with his thumb, still keeping his hand on the sheets, "How are you feeling?"

"How does it look like I'm feeling?!" Her remark was cruel and bitter-sounding, and he looked disappointed, she relaxed a little and shook her head as a gesture that she didn't mean to sound so rude. "I'm sorry…Just a little stressed out…that's all it is. I didn't plan on having the surgery…I wasn't emotionally prepared for it."

"Do you want me to bring you something?" He wanted to be as helpful as he could; she did all this against her will, she did it all for him and now he just wanted to help her through it and not make her feel like she'd made another mistake. He'd never felt like he had to step up more than he did now.

"I don't know." She smiled a little when he raised her eyebrow at her words, her cheeks turned red quickly, "I think I got…"

Kai choked on his breath a second, turning red in the face too but smiling softly and nodding, "I'll get your stuff from home." It's not like her period had never been mentioned between them, but she liked to keep Kai out of it, to save him from feeling more like a husband than a boyfriend. He gave her a peck on the lips, being unsure of what else he could tell her.

Tori pushed Kai's hand off, moving to the furthest side of the bed, resting against the cold bars a little and patting the newly-found space beside her, "Want to keep me company for a while?"

Kai got up onto the bed and pulled the covers over the both of them, pulling her body close to his to rest against his chest for a while. He provided her freezing cold body enough warmth for a while, enough that after some time she fell asleep but kept forcing herself awake. "You can get some sleep if you want to."

"No. I want to stay awake for a while. They'll just wake me up in two hours anyway."

"How come?"

Tori shrugged and tugged the covers up a little more when a chill ran over her, "I don't know…maybe they want to make sure I haven't died in my sleep."

He pulled his arms around her even tighter, surprising her at first but she found comfort in it anyway. "I'm sorry for yelling so much last time. I've always been used to yelling, at the team, at friends, at family, at anyone and there was no one that could really stop me. I know you hate it when I yell, I know I scare you and I do feel bad that I yelled so much last time."

Tori sighed and curled up a little bit more, "Kai when I met up with the lot of you…what? About three years ago now. I didn't meet up with you to change you, it was so that I could make friends. Did you know I never had real friends? I moved around far too much for that. Except for those few years in America, and all the girls my age there were all of those perfect blonde rich girls so I didn't make friends there either. So I wanted to be your friend, Mr. Dickinson said a lot of great things about you and the others and…I never met people as great as what he said so I wanted to meet you." She had tears going down from her eyes so fast at the memories, but she smiled a little and then, "He said you were a lot of trouble though and that regardless of how great you were I'd never get through to you no matter how long I lived."

Kai smirked, "And you, being the stubborn person you were and still are, wanted to prove him wrong."

"Yeah, and I got through to you…sort of. I swear Kai, back then I didn't plan on being around so long, I just wanted to meet you and all the others. And then I got really attached and none of you wanted me to die…I didn't expect any of you to find out I was ill but you found out and then I couldn't lie about it. After all this time it seems like I was trying to change you…and then when it settled in that I was sick again, I just thought more of myself than anyone else, it seems that way but its not the case. I thought of you, I thought that it looked like I was trying to change you and I didn't want that, and I was thinking that you…you deserved better than what you got with me." She sat up, pulling her legs to her chest and keeping her back to him. "You needed someone who didn't nag you as much as I did, you deserved someone prettier, someone smarter, someone more worthy. You changed a lot of your lifestyle for me so that you could live with me, so you could look out for me…"

"And you gave up freedom for me." Kai sat up just like she was, sitting beside her so that he could look at her broken face properly, "You hated your life and probably still do, you hate your skin, you hate a lot of it and just to make me happy you gave up your freedom, not just once, but twice."

"I love my life Kai, really I do. I used to be really happy. When I was younger, just waking up early one morning on a train, on a bus, in a car, on a plane and always somewhere beautiful regardless of the sick and dying people there were all around me, I could still find the beauty in it. Then I got sick again and I came here so that I could spend my last few months in one place and doing regular things, meeting friends, going to school, going to work. And then meeting you guys I felt even better…you thought you made my life miserable because of how much I worried about you and tried to care for you but…for once I had some sort of purpose; going around villages and homes where sick people stayed, not being able to help, kind of makes you feel helpless. So I stuck around and took the surgery, but it never dawned on me how long it'd be till you got fed up of me."

"And I never did get fed up of you and I just thought that…the only reason you wanted to die this time was because you didn't want to be around me."

Tori laughed, making a displeased sound, "You wish. I just thought you needed someone better than me and the best way to get out of it was this way but then you took it hard and…"

He'd had enough, he put up a silencing hand, at which she looked at him with curious teary eyes as he was ready to reply to them, "I…I went to an all-boy's prep school and…one forest hike away, there was an all-girls school. Now sometime or another, every student climbed the walls and left the schools to go see each other. I could've had any girl in that school if I wanted to, they were all about my age, rich, beautiful. But I didn't go after any of them."

"Why not?" She picked up a tissue from the nightstand, wiping at her eyes hard and waiting for him to continue.

"Because they were all rich, shallow, self-obsessed, uninteresting, honestly less useful than a sack of vegetables, incompetent, boring, cheaters, liars and please, don't make me continue because I could go all night at this rate. I mean…yes they were from my whole family's social circle, and yes there were some that were quite beautiful but what does that have to do with anything? I would much rather be with you, than any of those girls."

"I still don't follow."

Kai sighed at her, shaking his head a little bit at the idea that he had to explain himself a lot deeper than that. He wasn't one to speak about how much he liked her and what he liked about her, this was new to him, they'd never spoken like this before. They'd had deep conversations before but…none like this. "I like you a lot and I like you as the person you are and I wouldn't want to change anything. You're kind and sweet…you were never all that quick to judge but you always spoke your mind, no matter how much you disagreed. You're intelligent but…you still don't let that get in the way of some things, you just have fun with it. You're childish but you're mature when you need to be. I love the fact that you can just make someone feel comfortable…you can make them feel like what other people think doesn't matter or it's just unimportant and they can just be themselves and just take things easy for once in their lives."

"But…"

"No. You can't…put yourself down like this. You're…different from everyone else and that's one of the many things that just makes me adore you the way I do. You're not one of those girl's who are perfect and I'm thankful for that, really I am because otherwise it'd be me that would feel completely insufficient. I hope that in some time you can understand just how important you are and not just to me, but to a lot of people."

Tori lay back down, patting the fluffy pillow under her head, "If a prettier girl came along and showed interest in you and…she had all the good qualities you find in me and you find them in her too, would you go with her instead?"

"That… just goes against everything I've just said." Kai argued quietly, exhaling a whole wind of frustration at what he was dealing with, "I am happy with you, I have no regrets about the relationship, I'm never disappointed and what part of 'I love you' do you not understand?"

"I guess I'm just really paranoid."

Kai smiled at that but turned around and looked at her since she couldn't have seen it at first. "Your paranoia is good sometimes…it makes you who you are, doesn't it?" he lay back down beside her, pulling her lithe body slightly over his so her head would rest on him again. "And you know that sometimes I get as paranoid as you do…I'm like this too but then we just do stuff together and I feel different, it changes my mind."

Tori liked hearing Kai's heartbeat against her ear, smiling contently at the warmth around her again.

"One of the first things you taught me was…to accept myself as I am, not to let the things that happen to me bring me down and stop me from being the person that I am. So take your own advice."

Tori hummed appreciatively, both at his helpful advice and at the strong fingers that were lightly massaging her shoulders. "Thank you."

"For what?"

Tori lifted her head a little, resting her chin on his chest so she could look at him properly, "For making me feel better, of course and talking like that…I'll bet you found it difficult." She whispered sleepily.

"Isn't that what a good boyfriend would do? Make his girlfriend feel better?"

"So everything's okay between us?"

Kai smirked, "Of course it is." He inhaled deeply, "What I said last time, that was me just getting…" he couldn't find the right word, at the risk of using the word he disliked.

"Scared?" Tori asked with a weak smile.

Kai laughed at the adorable look on her face and the way she said that, "Yes…that." Tori giggled and moved under the sheets a little more, and hiding her face from Kai again. "What's wrong?"

"Are you mad that I won't…?"

The Russian lifted his head hurriedly, careful not too move too much, otherwise he'd hurt her fragile skull, "Have I ever looked like I was mad about that? I can wait a long time…it's not something that bothers me and if it were to happen and you felt rushed…then it would've just been a waste to wait. If I wait, and we do it when you're ready then I'm happy, but don't force yourself." He sat up slowly and slid out of the bed, "Now…stop worrying and concentrate on getting better. I'm going to go and tell the others that you're alright, even Bryan was a little worried when I spoke to him yesterday."

"Oh God…Bryan." Tori put a hand to her head, remembering how she'd called on his cell phone and yelled at him for leaving Kai that letter. She seemingly snapped out of it at Kai's quiet laughter, "What's so funny? I yelled at him pretty badly!"

"He said it's okay…he said he dated long enough to handle a girl yelling at him through tears so he said he understands and…he's sorry for betraying you and that he should've told you that he planned on telling me. He says he didn't even know that he was going to tell me…which makes me a little mad at him but I guess I can be just as understanding."

"Tell him I'm sorry anyway! And tell the team I said hello, okay?!"

Kai laughed, backing up towards the door, "Sure I will. Just rest."

"Kai…wait! Kai, please."

Kai sighed and walked back to her, smiling down slightly, "What is it?"

Tori smiled widely back up at him, "I love you." She murmured, reaching her arms up to him like a child wanting the adult to come down next to her.

Their lips met just momentarily, Kai tracing a few more stray kisses at the corner of her mouth and then on her jaw line. "I love you too." He kissed her forehead and then walked out of the room quick-paced so that she wouldn't call him back again any time soon. He made his way to the Dojo, that being the mid point between the apartment and the hospital. The team were sitting outside but he just intended on walking inside.

"Hey Kai."

"I'm going to lie down for a bit, if I fall asleep, wake me in an hour?"

The three all looked at each other, getting up and following the boy inside and to the living room, finding him lying down already. "What happened, Kai?" Max asked, concern dripping from his words.

"Did something bad happen to Tori?"

"What? No…no she's fine." Kai turned to lie on his stomach, turning his head to the side to face them but keeping his eyes shut tight.

"So what happened?"

Kai turned over on the uncomfortable sofa again, onto his side facing the back of the sofa, "We talked…like a decent couple and it took a lot out of me. I just want to relax for a while…I need to go back home and get some more stuff for her and then go back."

"You're really drained, Kai. Why don't we go and take Tori her stuff instead?"

"She doesn't want to see anyone else for now." It wasn't a complete lie; she had barely wanted to see him and she was going to be no more pleased about the others in any case. "Just give me half an hour." He opened his marble eyes and staring into the material, waiting anxiously for the others to leave.

"Sure."

He heard the feet shuffling against the wooden floors, disappearing back outside. He exhaled quietly, he really didn't want to go to sleep just yet. He didn't want to sleep at all. Maybe he had gotten too accustomed to sleeping next to Tori, but for the past few days he hadn't slept so well. It could've just been the panic of Tori's surgery too that unsettled him but he still hadn't managed to sleep, and ranting off his feelings to prove his love for his girlfriend hadn't helped his exhaustion much.

Maybe he just liked the idea of having someone next to him that'd protect him if he had ever really needed it. It was just that…one night, just more than a year ago. Kai's nightmares had gotten terrible for a while but she was always there for him in those dark long nights that felt painfully endless. He loved her soft whispers at that time of night.

--Flashback--

"Kai-kun, hey. Wake up." She urged more firmly, raising her voice and shaking him a bit more forcefully.

"Wake up, sweetie." She was unbelievably relieved as the eyelids finally fluttered open revealing scared, shimmering crimson orbs which first looked at her like the boy had troubles recognizing where he was and who was here with him in the room. He sobbed quietly and suddenly, uncontrollably with his hands to his face, trying to get his senses back and shake off the horror of the nightmare.

"Shh. It's okay. It was just a nightmare." Speaking in a gentle, calm voice Tori's hand moved up swiftly, cupping the cold cheek of the blader and stroking her thumb over the soft skin soothingly, feeling Kai lean into the touch desperately, trustingly.

He imagined how he looked so fragile and vulnerable, trembling beneath the vocalist's long fingers with the tears glistening in the moonlight on his skin, wide eyes still wearing the fright and anxiety in them. The image made Tori feel nothing more than the need to comfort and calm this frail being and try and take the horror plaguing him away from his mind and heart.

"It's alright now, Kai-kun." He remembered her repeating tenderly, bending down and gazing into those still fear-tainted eyes and feeling the tingling warmth of the other's lips against her own. "I'm here." She breathed out reassuringly before closing the distance and gently sealing those sweet lips in a soft kiss.

'I'm here,' it echoed in Kai's head before he felt the plump, warm lips of the other touch his own, shaking him awake from the pain-tainted haze his nightmare had put him into. Suddenly he was so very aware of Tori's presence so close, staring up into the calm eyes of the young girl, and easily recognizing the familiar flicker of concern in them. She made him feel comfortable at least, she put his mind at ease for a while.

--End Flashback--

It was those small things that he loved. No one had ever done that for him; no mother, no father, no sibling, no grandparent. No one had that much patience, so he kept telling himself. He remembered how that night ended…he had been stupid enough to walk away. It wasn't because he didn't want her help but he just felt weak for allowing himself to rely on her like that.

It didn't matter though. That was the only part of the memory he really needed to remember; the nightmare being painful, waking up to her gentle but wakening hold, her sweet quiet whispers, shushing sounds in his ear, hot breath against his skin, soft kisses on his mouth…that was all he needed to remember. He didn't want or need to remember the foolishness of his actions after that.

He couldn't bring himself to actually fall asleep though. He just lay there, his eyes closed, his breathing calm and even, exhausted but sleep still not taking him over. He assumed he should just get up and go home to get Tori her things, but he couldn't bring his aching and tired body to move just yet. It wasn't that he didn't have the strength, he just couldn't be bothered for the time being.

He just wanted to lie there. He wanted to think about what life would've been like if he hadn't met Tori when he did. Not because they would be pleasant memories, but thoughts like that always reminded him of the good that he had in his life now.

He couldn't quite understand what would've happened to him back then if they hadn't met. He assumed that if he were still alive, he'd still be not eating or sleeping properly till this day. And if he were dead, he would've either killed himself from the nightmares, even though he never deemed himself the suicidal type, or would've died from starvation. Another would've been that the team would've killed him if they found out about what was happening or what he was doing to himself, but he preferred to keep that possibility off his mind.

After about three quarters of an hour just lying there he began nagging at himself to get up. It seemed to take a lot more than that though, he began just thinking about how frustrated, bored and depressed Tori must be sitting in the hospital room all by herself. That was the most motivation he needed to get himself off the sofa, getting up and going to the apartment to get some more of Tori's things, trying to shake off the nervousness of having to pick through her private things and her underwear drawer.

He took the stairs up to her level, hoping that the longer walk would wake him up a little bit more but didn't like what he saw for the most part and wished he took the lift. He was about to pull the door open, instead it swung open in front of him, thankful his reaction time wasn't terrible due to the lack of sleep and was able to catch the door before it hit him. "Sorry." He eyed the nurse in front of him for a second. The same nurse from earlier, he recognized after another moment. "How is she doing?" he asked, stopping her from passing by him by placing a hand on her arm quickly.

"She's recovering well. She's been through these procedures before, she knows what goes on and things seem to be getting better." She gave him a sweet honest smile, reaching out and putting a hand on his shoulder, "Are you alright? You look a little faint."

Kai shook his head a little, "It's nothing. Dead body on the way down to the morgue threw me off." He smiled just a little bit to reassure her that he was fine and he moved to walk past her.

"Oh she has a visitor at the moment, in case you'd rather wait."

"A visitor?" He couldn't quite grasp the idea that she let someone else into the room.

The nurse turned back to him, nodding, "A friend of hers from the children's ward." She walked off after that, leaving Kai to stand there and revel in the confusion till he opened the door. He walked inside and saw Tori sitting up in bed, a sweet little girl with the same head-bandaging as his girlfriend sitting down in a wheelchair just beside the bed.

He walked up to it anyway, placing the bag on the ground beside the bed, "I got your stuff." He kissed her on the top of her head gently, sitting down in the chair.

"Thanks sweetie." Tori leaning forward and kissing him lightly. She felt the girl beside her tap her leg lightly, turning to her and watching her go through short hand movements, pointing at Kai quickly. "Ah, Kai this is Hamako." She turned back to the girl, going through some hesitant hand movements of her own before turning to Kai's blank face, not knowing of the big of nostalgia passing through him, and leaning a little closer and whispering, "She suffers from brain tumors too, not as recurring as mine but she's had it once before. She's deaf as a result of it, and can't speak much either."

Kai bit his lip a little, resting both arms on the bed and going through some more hesitant hand motions than his girlfriend had done, working them out in his head as he went through them. The introduction he offered caused the tiny girl to giggle sweetly, nodding her head at him slightly. He felt Tori's smirking and her bright eyes on him and turned to her, "What?"

"I didn't know you knew sign language."

"My grandmother was deaf…my mother too. Apparently every first born female in my family was deaf. And it's just basic alphabet that I know…aside from the Russian stuff at least." He picked up a pillow from a nearby vacant bed, putting it on the side of Tori's bed and resting his arms and head there.

Hamako tapped Tori's thigh lightly again, silently asking the auburn-haired female how he knew sign language, apparently not being able to keep up with reading Kai's fast-paced lips. Tori explained, careful not to stir Kai from beside her. Kai was seemingly thankful that their way of communicating was silent; it gave him the opportunity to rest for a few minutes. He was sure he fell asleep for at least fifteen minutes, but being able to know so much of what was around him and being uncomfortable in a place like a hospital, sleep wasn't all that possible.

He lifted his head when he felt the bed moving slightly, Tori was apparently getting back under the covers after she'd changed from the hospital gown and into her pale blue pajamas he'd got for her from home the other day. "Hey, go back to sleep." She murmured, guiding his head back down onto the pillow.

"Stop." Kai mumbled quickly, a growl accompanying it at the back of his throat.

He heard her exhale softly, "This is another reason why I didn't want you here."

"Why?"

"Because you're a damn good person, and you'd stay by my bedside till you were emotionally, mentally and physically exhausted."

"I'm not that tired."

"Yes you are." She forced him back down into the chair as he'd moved to get up, dragging the chair a little closer to her and looking at him sternly, some comfort lying beneath the layers of her bright brown eyes, "Let's try this again." She put his mature face in her hands, crushing Kai's lips with her own and waiting till the both of them couldn't breathe because of the kiss that got deeper and deeper. She pulled away, her thumb stroking the soft tired features of his face, "How are you?" she asked, the very moment she could breathe well again.

"Not so great," he murmured in a breathless tone, "But I've got a handle on myself."

"I should've called security and not let you see me…this is too much for you at once."

"No…really, I'm fine. I'm just sorry that I can't be more useful."

Tori put a great amount of pressure on Kai's forearms, such a great amount that Kai almost found it painful. "You have been very useful…but you can't handle all this pressure. You have a lot on your mind."

"As do you!" Kai shook his head and placed it down firmly onto the pillow for a moment before lifting it again, "I want you to be okay when this is all over, I want you to not be stressed out and the more I think that the more I try to make things better the more I fail at it."

"That's not true at all."

"Not all the time at least."

"Will you go home and get some sleep? At least for a few hours?"

"I tried and I couldn't sleep. If you don't believe me then ask the team, I was tossing on that sofa for a whole hour."

Tori kicked the sheets off and pulled her body closer to him, kissing the top of his head as she brushed the hair away from his skin, "I believe you." She massaged his back gently, palms digging deep into the tense muscles. He mumbled something appreciatively, and she moved away and pressing herself to the other side of the bed, "Get up here." She patted the empty space beside her.

"I'm fine here."

"You're going to hurt your back. Come and lie down here." She took a quick peek at his face when he didn't move, finding him already fast asleep on his strong arms. She smiled at that sweet look, she loved being able to see it. She moved back to lie in the middle of the bed, seeing no use in waking him back up. She picked a blanket off from the foot of her bed and placed it over his shoulders, laying back down on her side and watching him peacefully.

--Four Days Later--

Kai knelt down in front of her watching her supposedly asleep on the sofa. Her eyes flutter open slowly, "I'm not asleep." Kai's head rests on his arm, he let his hand slide up her shirt onto her slender aching stomach. She looked up at him and smiled softly as he rubbed the skin with care.

"Will you get me a popsicle?" she asked quietly with a pout, everything back to normal.

"Sure, what flavor?"

She looked at the ceiling, twisting her mouth while thinking, "Purple…Wait, no, green."

"Green?" He asked to make sure as he stood up.

Going in the kitchen Kai thought about the past few days and how things had gone. Tori stayed either at the hospital or in the apartment while Kai went to practice. She had begun taking the popsicles with her medication, the medication hurt her stomach a lot and the cold popsicles made her a little better. He smirked, opening the fridge; she's such a child asking for a green flavored popsicle, considering of what he knew 'green' wasn't a flavor.

He went back into the other room and handed her the popsicle. She opens it up speedily and cutely, like an excited child ripping open the wrapping on a present, and it's one of the double popsicles you break apart. So she broke it apart and handed Kai the other half. He sat on the sofa with her to eat. She had her legs bent, so that he could have room to sit close by, and her shirt pushed up just slightly. He went to touch her stomach lightly.

"Don't," she whines, pulling her legs closed and closer to her chest.

She moved to stand up but Kai put a hand on her leg, "Don't get up. What do you need?" he really didn't want her moving about so soon.

"Ice for my stomach…but I can get it you know?"

Kai went to the kitchen quickly, tossing the finished popsicle in the bin and going back to the living room with ice wrapped up in a clean dishcloth. He sat down beside her, lifting her clothing and carefully placing it on the bare skin. He saw her wince hard at the cold, giving her a moment before pressing it down.

"You don't need to keep doing this for me, Kai."

"Doing what?"

"Taking care of me…I know that I've been sick for a long time and now you know it too, but you know as well as I do that I can take care of myself quite well, I did it last time too."

"Last time you were in the hospital for two weeks…this time it wasn't even for a week. Last time you had been in hospital a long time after your surgery so you had them to take care of you…"

Tori sat up, pressing the cold material to her stomach, putting her other hand to the back of Kai's head, "I want to thank you for being so great to me…you were always great with me, looking after me when I needed it and it seems like lately I needed it most so thank you," she gripped at his hair a little more, "Now lay off, will you? I'm getting more exhausted by watching you do all the work, than me doing the work myself."

The Russian smirked and pulled the girl against him, "Do you get this exhausted when you're looking after me?"

"No…but I guess I enjoy it, and I like helping out. Kai you've got to understand that because I was sick, I could never make many definite plans, I couldn't pick up too many hobbies, couldn't get a job I could keep because I'd had to quit when I became too weak, I couldn't even stay in school for long. So it was good to have something to do…something to help out with. I told you, you're the reason I live and I really mean that."

Kai leaned forward and placed his lips over hers for a second, "I think that…the best thing I can tell you to that is thank you, and I love you."

He kept his forehead close to hers, his lips still brushing over her own sweetly. She loved this closeness, she could just feel his breath against her skin, the scent of him, the heat of his skin radiating from him. "That's all I need you to say." She pressed her lips back to his, wrapping her arms around him when he actually kissed her back with as much passion as she was hoping for. She was dying to feel this closeness again since for the past few days, the emotional closeness had gotten stronger but in a way she was craving the physical closeness too. She felt the kisses going lower, along her bony jaw line and then over her neck and collarbone, moving from one side of her ear and to the other. "Kai…your mouth is cold." She murmured against his ear, breathing deep. He seemingly thought that it was just his mouth cold from the popsicle and would warm up eventually. He continued to kiss her softly, for a while ignoring her quiet and random murmurs of it being so cold.

He pulled away after another moment, taking her form in properly. She was holding onto her own arms hard, her shoulders shaking and her face starting to pale. He held onto her shoulders, still holding her like he would a fragile doll, "You're freezing." He confirmed softly.

She breathed hard another time, her forehead colliding fast with Kai's muscled chest as she fell against him, feeling her body trembling beneath his strong arms. She felt him brushing his hands against her skin in attempt to warm her up, his other arm dragging blankets over her. Things went black after that.

--A Month Later--

Kai tossed a bunch of bags in front of the door, sometimes sliding large bags across the floor, all the way from the bedroom door to the front door and silently hoping that the friction didn't start a fire. Tori was half an hour later, and now so was he and she was probably going to throw a fit when she got home and saw all the things by the bags of clothing by the front door.

He'd spoken to the team the other day. He asked them if they could take Tori out for the day and keep her away from home till six in the evening. He'd said six because it'd take half an hour to explain everything, and then half an hour to get to the first destination. Now it was six thirty, Tori was late and he quietly cursed them for not knowing how to read a watch properly. Just as he'd tossed the last bag to the door he went to the living room to look out off the balcony if the taxi had arrived, it hadn't, just yet.

Tori arrived, he heard the keys in the lock in the door. She always took an extra few seconds to find the lock, her hands had been never being able to find the lock from impatience. He opened the door quickly and pulled her inside and just as he'd expected, she looked down at the load of bags and fear washed over her whole form. "Kai…" she looked up at him hurriedly, "Where are you going?"

He didn't want her to be scared, this was the complete opposite to what he wanted her to be feeling. He wanted her to be happy, excited, not frightened. He gave her a peck on the lips, holding tight on the small of her back, "Relax…it's nothing like what you're thinking."

"Then what is it?"

"Long story. Why weren't you here half an hour ago?"

"We went for a walk, got really far away and then they wanted to get back quickly but I didn't see the need to rush. Kai, what's going on?"

Kai glanced at his watch, lying back against the wall; he had a good five minutes. "You remember we went out about three months ago and you saw a painting in that antique store of that lodge in the forest?"

"Perfectly. I said it was probably like paradise there, what's that got to do with it?"

"I found the place. The guy rents that place out every year when he goes to visit his daughter in Shikoku so there's six weeks till the tournament and for the next month he is not going to be there and I rented the place out for the next three weeks."

Tori blinked, shaking her head and looking at him shockingly, "Wait…what?"

"Which part of this is unclear?"

"No…I mean…why are you doing this? It's not that I'm not happy…"

"I figured you needed to relax, I wanted to take you away from the stress for a while, away from the city, away from the team."

Tori pressed forward slowly, holding onto his hands tight as she looked around at everything ready by the door, "You really planned all this out didn't you?"

Kai breathed a sigh of relief, lying back a little more against the wall and pulling Tori with him, "Down to the last second and then I fell asleep on the sofa for about fifteen minutes which threw me off but otherwise, yes, everything's planned. One fifteen minute taxi drive, then one forty minute flight, the rest by car. Now if you're not up to going then that's fine."

He ran his fingers through that bright auburn hair, which to this day still contrasted heavily with his pale white hands. He loved the way she looked so close to him, they loved the fact that while being so different, they understood each other. With her own fingers in his hair and then on his tense shoulders, she leaned closer and kissed him softly, yet still passionately enough that he was able to understand what she meant.

'Kai…if it ever happened that I died while in your arms, then I'd say I died a very happy person. I didn't expect to live as long as I did, and in the end I'm glad that the reason I lived was for you. I hope you understand the love I have for you. It has been a pleasure and an honor knowing you. I love you with all my heart. Let's be together for a lot longer, shall we? What I can never tell you in words, I will tell you in actions, and regardless of our differences, we will still understand. I know you love me like I love you…please don't feel the need to make yourself different for me. I love you for who you are. Sometimes you think that you need to be perfect, that you cannot make mistakes. At these times you put so much pressure on yourself I wish that you would realize that you are a human being- like everyone else…You are capable of reaching great potential but not capable of being perfect. So please, just do your best and realize that this is enough. Don't compare yourself to anyone. Be happy to be the wonderful, unique, very special person that I know for a fact you are.'

'I can barely tell you of all the wishes I have for you…There are so many of them and I want them all to come true. Please remain self-reliant like you've always been, but please remember that you will never be alone. Please never lose your childlike wonder, your delight and appreciation in interesting things. So many treasures await you in your long future…and I know it'll be long because you'll live as long as I'm with you, and I'm not letting go. Maybe I can't always tell you I love you, but I'll always let you know it. Being blessed with you, has been mine.'

Denzelle sat outside on the balcony, staring out at the sunset over the beautiful Japanese city. Three years into their relationship and they found their happiness and she enjoyed watching it grow into the relationship it is now. It proved to even the most stubborn people, that love is possible for everyone, that love can be found in anyone, and that everyone deserves to be loved. This thought in mind, she wondered back, 'Ashley Rice once said- "Be interested in others and what they might teach you. But do not look for yourself in the faces of others. Do not look for who you are in other people's approval. Believe in yourself. Follow your heart and your dreams. You- like everyone else- will make mistakes. But so long as you are true to the strength within your own heart…you can never go wrong."'

A/N: And it's over my dear readers! This is the saddest yet happiest ending I've ever written. It was a happy ending for them, but sad for me to write it to the very end. I honestly would've had this up sooner if it weren't for the fact that I were bawling for most of it.

I think what I wanted to prove with the last two chapters is that, opposite-attract relationships are possible, they're sometimes even the strongest, but like everyone else, they have their troubles, personally and in the relationship. This was to show that this wasn't one of those couples that always lived happily ever after, this was to show people that you can still have your happy story, but there'll always be trouble in there and the fact that you get through it together, just makes it all worth it in the end.

…Says the girl who hasn't dated within the past year but anyways. I really do hope you all enjoyed this and I hope that everyone just takes a few minutes of their time to review it because I really did put a lot of work into this whole story. I'm happy that a lot of people reviewed last chapter upon my request (past chapters was getting about four or five reviews per chapter, chapter 11 got about eleven reviews) I'm very thankful for everyone who reviewed, and I'm thankful for everyone's continuous support of my writing, it has been really great, thank you. Also, I'm glad I was told that I didn't ruin the reputation of "Cats and Dogs"

As a quick note, a friend of mine asked if I was going to write the chapters of them at the lodge after this chapter. My answer is a no, for the simple reason that I planned on them finally having sex sometime in those three weeks and I find that to possibly be too explicit to write for this story, even if I made it a side shot or something. Really though, what happens in those three weeks is completely up to your imagination, another reason why I left it a mystery. The future of this couple, really rests in your imagination.

One hell of an author's note, forgive me but I thought my thanks to you all was long over due. Thank you all, once again, and I hope you enjoy any of my future writings. Keep safe everyone!