So hey guys my computer's officially dead and I can't get anything off of it. This means that Strange Connections will not be updated for at least another three weeks, unless I find a place where I can get the most recent stuff off of my external hard drive before I go home for break. Other fics… well, it's the same thing, really. There are only a few that I don't need to check on the external hard drive before continuing to write them. This fic is one of those, and then there's the Indiana Jones one and the LotR one. So yeah.

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It wasn't long after they had passed by Pride Rock that Mufasa realized there was no point in continuing the chase. The two Scars had outrun them, and the smartest thing to do from here was to return to his pride and tell them what was happening. He gestured to Hohenheim that they were to turn around, and the human stopped walking.

"I don't suppose there's any point in continuing," Hohenheim said, reading Mufasa's mind very well.

Mufasa nodded and gestured to Pride Rock. "I told your son to head to Pride Rock. We should meet them there."

"I have no idea what you just said, but I'm going to assume we have to go to that place you're gesturing to," Hohenheim said. "Is that where the boys are?"

Mufasa nodded. At least Hohenheim understood the situation well enough to make the correct guesses. They walked through the grasslands in silence, not stopping until they reached Pride Rock a few minutes later. Edward, Alphonse, and Simba hadn't arrived yet, but Mufasa wasn't too concerned. He explained the situation to his pride, finishing just as an unexpected visitor arrived.

"What brings you here?" Mufasa asked as Rafiki approached.

"I need to speak with you," Rafiki replied. "Some things are happening that should not be happening."

"I know," Mufasa said. "Scar has completely turned against us, and he's probably planning something else now."

"He has allies," Rafiki said. "I saw him speak to the hyenas earlier today. They are waiting for your son to try to return to Pride Rock. It is lucky those boys got lost on the way here!"

Mufasa couldn't help but smile at Rafiki's trickiness. "Where did you send them?"

"Towards the jungle," Rafiki replied.

"What?" Zazu asked from nearby. "They'd have to cross the desert to get there!"

"Zazu, I want you to find them and explain the situation to them," Mufasa said. "Make sure they make it across the desert safely."

"Yes, sire," Zazu said before flying off.

"Rafiki, I'm going to need your help," Mufasa said once Zazu had gone. "There's still one human who has no idea what's going on."

.,.,.,.,.,.,.

A desert.

That monkey had sent them to a desert.

And there was no sign of Pride Rock anywhere.

Ed would have screamed curse words at the top of his lungs if Simba hadn't been there, drinking water from a small stream.

"Maybe we have to keep going straight," Al suggested.

"No, I really don't think there's any desert near Pride Rock," Simba replied, and Ed translated.

"So that monkey lied to us," Ed growled. "I knew something was wrong when he was talking."

"Well… what now?" Simba asked.

Ed shrugged. "I guess we'll just have to find our way back by ourselves."

"Wait. Dad said to respect what that guy said, because he was smart. Maybe we should keep going."

"But who knows how far we've got to go?" Ed snapped. "And what if we need to help fight against Scar?"

"Which Scar?" Simba asked.

"Well… I guess they're pretty much one and the same by this point," Ed answered. "I mean… they both want at least one of us dead, and that'll be easier for them if they team up, so…"

"I can't believe Uncle Scar hates me that much," Simba said.

"Hey, it's not your fault he's a corrupt bastard," Ed said reassuringly.

"Brother!"

"What? It's true!" Ed snapped.

"Well, yeah, but couldn't you have kept it clean?"

"Oh, come on, it's not like Simba cares, do you, Simba?"

But Simba didn't answer. He was staring at something in the distance. Ed noticed his preoccupation and followed the cub's gaze.

"Hyenas…" Simba whispered. "They're all staring at us."

Ed frowned. "That's probably not good. Maybe we should cross the desert after all." He clapped his hands, placed them on the ground, and transmuted a watertight container that he then filled with water from the nearby stream. He had just finished it when something rather unexpected happened.

"I am so glad I found you!" Zazu said as he landed on a nearby boulder. "Mufasa wants you to head towards the jungle on the other side of this desert."

"Why? Is it because of those hyenas over there?" Simba asked.

Zazu jumped when he saw the hyenas watching them. "They've found you already? This is awful! Come, let's get out of here!"

Ed gave the water container to his brother and led the way, looking over his shoulder at the hyenas every once in a while. It looked like the only thing keeping them from attacking was a steep cliff that they would have to climb down.

"What's happening?" Simba asked as they walked.

Ed was quiet as Zazu explained the situation. He was busy keeping an eye on the hyenas walking behind them, slowly making their way down the cliff in a way that left no doubt in Ed's mind that they were going to attack.

"So we've got to get to the jungle and hope they give up on crossing the desert behind us?" Ed asked.

"That's essentially the plan, yes," Zazu replied.

Ed groaned. That was much easier said than done, especially since they had no hopes of secrecy now. "Well, I guess we'll just have to be smart about this," he muttered, bringing his hands together and mentally assessing the quality of the dry, cracked ground beneath them.

"Do you have a plan, brother?" Al asked.

"I'm trying to get one together," Ed replied. "I think we need to walk along the edge of the desert for a while, though."

"But that's out of the way!" Zazu exclaimed.

"Yeah, exactly. We'll make them think we're taking the long way back to Pride Rock and give 'em the slip somewhere along the way."

"How're we gonna do that?" Simba asked.

"I don't know yet," Ed admitted. "But I'm sure I'll have thought of something by the time they catch up with us."

Al groaned. "If you're the one coming up with the plan, then we're all doomed."

"Al!"

"Whatever, brother. Let's just get going."

Ed sighed and began to lead the way. Zazu leapt from his perch and flew in circles above them, giving Ed updates on the hyenas' approach. It wasn't long before they had gotten down from the cliffs and were running after the little group. It was sometime around then that Al came up with a decent idea.

"Brother, wait until they're close and then transmute a dust storm or something. We can get a ways into the desert without showing any footprints, and hopefully the dust will make it hard for them to catch our scent."

"Yeah, I was gonna do something like that," Ed replied, feeling slightly irritated that Al had stolen his only idea. "How far away are they?"

"They're coming up quickly," Zazu replied. "They'll likely be coming over the hill in a couple of minutes."

Ed kept his eyes on the hill they'd recently climbed over as he brought his hands together. Any moment now…

"There they are!" Zazu cried, just as Ed saw a blur of grey at the top of the hill. He placed his hands on the ground and felt an immense satisfaction when he heard the hyenas shouting in frustration. He transmuted a wall between his group and theirs just in case and grabbed onto Al's arm. Al had picked up Simba, and they were now sprinting across the ground, keeping absolutely silent to be sure the hyenas didn't hear them.

It worked. An hour later, Ed and Simba were collapsed on the hard desert ground, coughing up dust and watching for Zazu. The bird showed his face less than a minute later with the news that the hyenas were wandering back towards the Pride Lands.

"Nice going, Ed," Simba said. "I guess we just have to get to the jungle now, huh?"

"And you had better hurry," Zazu added. "I'll stay with you until you can see it for yourselves, and then I must return to tell your father what happened."

"Was our father with him?" Al asked.

"Yes, he was, though I think he will have a hard time understanding what's going on," Zazu replied, and Ed translated.

"Good," Ed muttered. "I wouldn't want it to be too easy for him."

Al sighed and shook his head. "He did save us, you know."

"That doesn't change a whole lot," Ed replied as he continued walking.

"Well, if you two are done arguing, I'm going to check on the hyenas," Zazu said.

"Yeah, sure," Ed replied. They continued walking in silence, stopping only a couple of times to drink water and such, until night fell and the air became cold. Zazu returned sometime around then with good news. The hyenas had officially given up on chasing after them.

"Can we go home yet?" Simba asked.

"No. Your father wants you to wait in the jungle until it's safe for you to return."

Ed sighed. "Well, I guess that's that. We'll see you later, I suppose."

"Wait. Shouldn't we write a message for our father?" Al asked. "You know, so he at least knows a little about what's going on?"

"He can figure it out for himself," Ed snapped.

"Okay, then, how about this? If he doesn't know what's going on, he'll make life difficult for everyone else, and you wouldn't want him to make other people miserable with his ignorance, would you?"

"Hm, you've got a point," Ed said thoughtfully. "All right, let's get to it. You wouldn't mind carrying it, would you, Zazu?"

"It depends on what you're asking me to carry," Zazu said.

"Well," Al said, pulling some paper out from beneath his loin cloth. Ed cringed a bit. Even if he was just a suit of armor, that just didn't look right. "I've got some paper here, but I don't know what to write with. Think you can transmute some ink with something out here, Ed?"

"Screw that, I'll just open one of my cuts and use my blood," Ed replied, reaching for the nearly-healed cut on his head.

"Brother!"

"I'm kidding, I'm kidding! Just give me the paper. I'll get it taken care of."

"Good. Just be sure to make it tactful."

,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.,

Dear Bastard,

Here's what's happening. For some reason I managed to get trapped in this psychotic lion world where every single animal I run into can talk to me, and despite the fact that this shouldn't even be possible, I've decided to help them with a problem they're having. See, that creepy dark-furred lion (Scar) that tried to kill us all is the brother of that lion that you healed (Mufasa). Mufasa's the king of the lions. Scar wants to be king, and he tried to get rid of Mufasa's son Simba in some attempt to be the next in line. When that plan was exposed, I'm guessing he just went crazy and decided to kill people and take over by force. It looks like he's got some hyenas on his side, so something big and bad might happen soon. I have no idea why these animals have their own government and political disputes, but Mufasa was nice enough not to eat me so I want to help him. By the way, I called you a bastard because you ditched us and ruined our lives.

Sincerely,

Edward

PS: The dark-skinned guy with Scar is Scar, who's an Ishbalan who wants to kill me and all the other State Alchemists. I have no idea what Scar's planning with him, but if it gets me killed, I'm sure Scar will agree with it.

Hohenheim read through the note three times before folding it and putting it in his pocket. "Well, I think I understand what's going on now," he said to Mufasa. "Though it would be nicer if my son were here to translate."

Mufasa grunted in acknowledgement. He and Hohenheim were standing on the highest point of Pride Rock, searching the surrounding land for signs of Scar or the hyenas. Zazu, upon delivery of the letter, had left to do the same thing before returning to the boys in the desert.

"Well, there's no signs of anything suspicious yet," Mufasa said, doing his best to communicate that through gestures and motions. "We might as well go inside for the night."

"I suppose we should," Hohenheim agreed. They walked together down the stone and entered the cave, not noticing the lone hyena watching them from behind a shrub.

.,.,.,.,.,.,.,.

"They're suspecting an attack," Scar muttered as he listened to the hyena's report. "Those brats have probably made it back to Pride Rock as well."

Shenzi, Banzai, and Ed were keeping their distance. They'd failed to capture the cub and the golden-eyed human, and Scar wasn't going to let them forget it. Scar had planned on using Simba as a hostage of sorts, but without that cub, he would have to take a more extreme course of action. This, of course, would not be possible without the dozens of hyenas under his command. He could spare a few to find those brats, but the rest would prepare for an attack on the Pride Lands.

"You want to kill that little human boy, don't you?" Scar asked the human through lots of gestures and drawings in the dirt.

"Yes."

"If you help me, you will get that chance."

The human Scar was silent for a good while. "What did you have in mind?" he asked.

As Scar explained his plan to the human, he chose to leave out certain details. After all, the human didn't have to know why the Pride Lands needed to be taken over, or that Scar was going to be getting his revenge on both Mufasa and Simba. All the human needed to know was that Scar wanted to get his paws on that little cub, which meant getting rid of that alchemist.

.,.,.,.,.,.

Do you people realize how confusing it is to write this stuff? I mean, come on, Scar didn't like Scar's face, so Scar took Scar to the place where Scar often waited for Scar and Scar decided to beat Scar up for taking him here, but then Scar hugged Scar and everything was fantastic. SCAR SCAR SCAR SCAR SCAR SCAR that word looks weird now.