CHAPTER 2

I was standing in the kitchen alone, shell shocked by his words. I took a gulp of liquid courage and raced up the stairs after him. His door was shut. It was locked.

"Alohamora," I whispered, tapping the handle with my wand.

The door swung open, and Sirius was lying on the bed, facing away from me. He didn't speak or stir when I entered the room. I stepped over to the bed cautiously and then sunk down beside him. My hand reached out to stroke his back, but I pulled it back hesitantly.

Damn it, Remus, touch him! I thought. You've wanted to touch him for almost twenty years now, so do it!

My fingertips grazed his shoulder blade, feeling the soft material of his shirt. I saw him stop breathing. I grew more courageous. Summoning every ounce of Gryffindor courage, I let my hand caress his back, his strong arm, even the sensitive place where his neck met his shoulder. I kicked off my shoes and stretched out on the bed behind him, laying close to him, but not so close that we were touching. My erection was starting to stir again.

Do it, Remus. Just do it, you cad! You coward!

I lifted his long, black hair with a shaking hand and placed a very gentle, very hesitant kiss on the back of his neck. Sirius shifted. I could practically feel the wheels in his head turning, the indecision in his heart of what to do next. He rolled over to face me.

"What was that for?" he whispered.

Our faces were inches apart. The grey eyes were soft now. I sighed.

"I think about that day all the time, Sirius," I began again, speaking volumes with a quiet tone. "I think about it because I made a mistake."

Sirius didn't respond. I caressed his dark hair with my fingertips and brought my lips to his. He met my kiss tentatively, as though he wasn't sure whether I was pulling his chain or not. But when my hand drifted to his hips, pulling him close against me, he moaned into my mouth. That sound was heavenly.

He seemed to accept my kissing him, accept that it wasn't his imagination. It wasn't a dream or a trick. Sirius rolled on top of me and it was my turn to moan. Just as I'd pictured it. I wrapped my legs around his hips and let him kiss me deeply. My fingers were holding his hair out of his face. His hands were exploring my body sensually. My skin was on fire. I could feel my erection pressing against him, and I could feel his against me.

I pulled off his shirt and let my hands roam the hard muscles of his upper body. He was tattooed, and branded from Azkaban. My lips touched his chest of their own accord. Everything was happening naturally, instinctually now. I wondered how I could have ever touched a woman. I hoped he was wondering the same.

His hands tugged at my shirt and I lifted my back from the bed to let him pull it over my head. His fingers fumbled with the button of my trousers. And when he pulled them down off my legs, my erection sprung into view. Gazing down at him, I had never felt so turned on in my life. His mouth was inches from my aching cock. I whimpered softly in anticipation.

Sirius's hands caressed my thin, lithe form. I was nothing like him. He was all muscle, strength, and I was practically a waif. I lacked the definition that made Sirius so damn sexy. I was just about to begin feeling truly self-conscious when I felt his warm mouth wrap around me.

An unintelligible grunt left my throat. Merlin, looking down at him, his dark hair partially masking his face, it nearly ended right then. Those perfect lips around my cock. Those gorgeous eyes, dancing with lust, staring back at me. His hand cupped my balls gently. His tongue swirled around the head and trailed up and down the shaft, alternating between the smooth underside and the rough top of his tongue as he licked. I took his black hair in my hand.

"Sirius, I'm about to come," I groaned.

His fervor only increased. His mouth sucked gently as he bobbed up and down. I could only watch in awe as I felt my release take me. He swallowed, never removing himself from my erection as I came into his mouth. I exhaled with a hiss and closed my eyes, and then I fell back onto the bed.

Sirius draped himself on top of me, his fingers tracing circles on my thin chest. I took his hand in mine, resting for a moment as I recovered. I felt his lips pressing tiny kisses on my neck.

"I'm so in love with you, Remus," he whispered. "I always have been."

My heart soared.

"I'm so sorry, Sirius," I told him. "I've wanted to tell you for so many years. I've never stopped thinking about you, about that kiss."

I turned my head to gaze into his eyes.

"I love you," I said.

Sirius kissed me again, and I could taste the last remnants on myself on his tongue. His hand dragged through my hair. His fingers traced the faint scars on my body. I unbuckled his belt. His slid his trousers down his legs. I pulled Sirius on top of me and held him close.

"I want to feel you inside of me," I whispered.

"Remus, are you sure?" asked Sirius quietly.

I nodded, closing my eyes. Sirius groaned.

"I've never been with a man," I said.

"Nor have I," Sirius replied with a grin. "I was saving that for you."

I kissed him. Sirius reached for his wand on the night table. My hand stroked up and down on his cock as he murmured a spell. I could feel slick, cool lubrication between my legs. I felt it coat his cock. I closed my eyes and braced myself. I had no idea what to expect. Sirius's mouth found mine and kissed me lovingly as his hand guided his cock to me.

It was slow at first.

"Relax," he hissed into my ear.

I tried to relax. It took several slow, shallow thrusts for Sirius to even push himself halfway into me. It didn't hurt, but it was uncomfortable. Unusual. Sirius let out a hissing breath next to my ear.

"Merlin, you're so fucking tight," he said.

I relaxed as best I could, my mind focused only on the beautiful man on top of me, and how much I loved him. How I could never admit that I did. That all of these years I had been denied this, denied making love to him. I felt Sirius slide all the way inside of me. A groan left my throat.

"Are you alright?" whispered Sirius.

"More than alright," I replied.

Sirius grinned at me, that sexy grin that always made me weak in the knees. I'd seen him send that grin in the direction of so many women, and now he was grinning at me. I kissed him as he began to pick up his pace. It was an odd feeling, having him thrusting into me. A feeling of fullness I was beginning to rather enjoy. And what I enjoyed most was the heavenly expression on Sirius's face. His eyes were closed, his breath was ragged. I could tell his orgasm wasn't far off.

"I love you, Sirius," I whispered again.

"I love you, Moony," he answered, his eyes shut tight.

I could feel his cock tense inside me. I saw his face shift to that expression of ultimate release. He groaned in pleasure and thrust slowly, two, three more times, and then he collapsed onto me.

I stroked his back lightly as he regained his breath. Finally, he rolled over, pulling me against him. He kissed my sandy blonde hair. I listened to his heart beating inside his chest. I wrapped my arms around Sirius, my Sirius.

The man I loved.