Ziva stood and walked to the center of the bullpen. Tony looked up
"You going home?" He grabbed his coat and bag, and swung them over his shoulders.
"No, no." Ziva said quietly. Tony looked at her expectantly.
"Tony," she took a breath "Tony, when we were in the bathroom, you remember?" Tony nodded "You asked me why, why I cared, and I said, 'because you were my partner, and because you made a mistake," she paused. "It was because, I care and because…" she trailed off, "Because I love you. Tony, I love you."
Ziva looked up at Tony's face, he was so tall, she had taken her shoes off so he seemed even taller. Tony turned face her square on, he looked at her quizzically, their eyes met, Ziva looked at him gently, and vulnerable. "That look," Tony started, his voice hardly more then a whisper, " is the exact same one, you had when you were falling in love with Lt. Saunders." Ziva's eyes glazed over, but only momentarily, she focused again on Tony, the muscles in her face maintained their positions, only she wasn't scared this time.
Tony stepped toward her and cupped her cheek in his hand, she looked up at him they maintained eye contact. Ziva rose up onto her toes, and pushed herself towards him, and kissed him, slowly, her hands found his waist and rested there. Tony pulled away Ziva looked at him happy and obviously infatuated with a small smile and a blush like a girl who just had her first kiss. Tony's face was blank, Ziva's face fell.
"I have to go," Tony picked up his things and headed for the elevator. Ziva stood in the same position, in shock, as she heard the elevator doors close, tears pouring down her face she fell apart in silence, she ran to the stairs, halfway down she yelled "ABBY?" she was chocked up and could hardly breathe she'd never felt like this before not even when Roy died.
"Ziva? What is it" Abby poked her head out of her lab, "ZIVA! " She cried and raced to her friend and enveloped her in one of her hugs reserved for special emergencies. "Oh Ziva, baby, what happened." For the first time ever Ziva appreciated the hug, she let herself rely on Abby and she was manoeuvred into Abby's inner office, Abby continued to keep her arm around her until her tears subsided, rocking her side to side like a crying child. "Oh baby. What happened." She asked, sensing it was safe to ask. "I told him." Abby knew exactly what she was talking about "What happened?" Ziva stepped backward she could face her, Abby maintained physical contact by holding her hands. " I told him, that I loved him, and he told me, he said I was wearing the same expression as when I was looking at Roy," she gave a chocked laugh "Then he kissed me, Abby he kissed me, then he left he just left." She started to cry silently again, tears running down her face again, Abby hugged her and let her cry. "Come on, I'll take you home." She said,
"No, no, I can still drive, I feel better now, thank you Abby."
"Ok, well at least let's go for a drink." Ziva nodded, she was in no mood to argue, and she needed someone to take control.
Abby dropped Ziva home, and told her to call tomorrow, if she needed a lift to work. "But if you need a day off, I'll tell Gibbs something plausible." She offered
"Thanks Abby, but that will not be necessary, I will be fine. I'll see you tomorrow," one last hug and Abby left. Ziva walked into her living room, she prided herself on being clean and tidy, but now the room just felt empty, she felt like she was at a crime scene, in a place that means nothing to her.
flashback+++
The doorbell rang again. "Yes Tony, I'm coming." She called "Well come faster, it's raining!" Ziva pulled open the door, to a very wet looking Tony DiNozzo, he looked at her annoyed she gave a small laugh and pulled him inside. "Dinner will be ready in a minute," she said still smiling, looking him up and down, "Go and take a shower, you've still got some sweatpants here somewhere, I'll find then for you." He looked at her, "Go! Now!" she pushed him towards her bathroom. She left and found the pair of sweatpants he had left at her house weeks ago, passing them into him in the bathroom and then returning to the kitchen still smiling to herself, ten minutes later and happier Tony DiNozzo walked in behind her and peered over her shoulder, "Oh, what are we having?" she felt him standing right behind her. "Spaghetti Bolognaise," she replied, stirring the mixture. "Really," he questioned, "Is there any desert?" she dropped the spoon and did one of her quick little mossad moves, turning to face him, her back arching over the stove, "Maybe, if you behave." She cocked her head to the side. Tony slid an arm around the small of her back and picked her up, sweeping her off to the side and then picking up the spoon and stirring the mixture himself, "I'll take care of this, and you start on the dessert." Ziva laugh at him, he could be so juvenile. They ate dinner, then watched a movie, just as they always did, Ziva smiled and shock her head softly as Tony laid down on the couch, with his head resting on her thigh, "God your legs are bony!" he said, within seconds and pillow landed on his face, he placed it on Ziva's thigh and made himself comfortable, Ziva ran her hand through his hair and then placed it on his shoulder, he closed his eyes for a few seconds then returned to watching the movie, Ziva leaned down so her lips brushed his ear "You are probably the youngest 35-year-old I have ever met," she whispered. He grunted quietly in response, "You love it," he said, she knew he was right, they watched the rest of the movie in silence. When it ended Ziva looked at the clock, 11:30, "Tony, wake up, sleepyface, you need to go home."
"SleepyHEAD, Ziva" Tony responded half asleep. Ziva jerked her leg to wake him up. He rolled over and off the couch, Ziva laughed; she did that a lot when he was around. She got down on all fours and faced him upside down, "Anything broken?"
"Nope, but stay there I've got a great view." She slapped him across the face and stood up, "Come on," Tony stood up, and surveyed the living room, there were still ice-cream wrapper on the coffee table and the pillows were scattered, the TV was displaying the DVD 'please insert disk' screen and humming quietly, "You see Ziva, this is what an American home looks like, Homey." Ziva looked at him "Opps, ah sorry about that," she turned him around and frog marched him to the door, "GO HOME, Gibbs is bound to call us at some un godly hour just because we stayed up late."
"Ok, OK, I'm going." When they got to the door Tony turned swiftly and lifted her off her feet, in one movement, he'd learned a few of her mossad tricks, she laughed in his arms and hugged him, she was still mid air, she swayed her legs and he put her down. She stood on her toes in order to continue hugging him, he buried his face in her neck and kissed her, "Oh!" she pulled her head backwards, he looked at her like a child caught looking through a closet to find his presents. Ziva eyed him up arms still around his neck, his around her waist, she lent in and kissed him gently, They let go of one another "Goodbye Tony,"
"Bye Ziva, Oh before I go," he lent in and kissed her again, when they parted, she Gibbs-slapped him. "What was that for?"
"Thinking you could get away with that!" she closed the door. She walked into her living room and looked around, he was right it was home now.
+++End Flashback+++
Too clean, this room had no life now, when Tony had been coming over every week, the room seemed warm, they had fun, and she loved having him around, they'd fooled around and they'd kiss but it was always a joke. Ziva observed the kitchen, it was different too, there was no food cooking and the aroma from last night's meal had left. Her footsteps echoed through the empty apartment, this wasn't home anymore not when there was no trace of Tony left, she sat on the couch and held the pillow, Tony so often fell asleep on, to her face, it still smelled like him, she cried, tears stained the cotton fabric. The doorbell rang; "Abby, I'm fine!" the doorbell rang again and again, Ziva stood and moved to the door, hand on her sig, she was well trained and didn't take chances she undid the chain and opened the door, pointing her weapon at the offending party, "TONY!" she stammered, she replaced her gun and looked at him with strength she knew it was obvious she'd been crying. "Can I come in?" he asked, formally. "Why?" Ziva said, harshly
"I want to talk to you." Ziva looked him up and down and stalked into the living room, leaving the door open for him to follow. He closed the door gently; Ziva was standing on the far side of the room, with her arms crossed over her chest. "Ziva, I'm sorry I left, but there was something I needed to do, urgently." Ziva said nothing, she continued to stare at him. "Ziva please, sit down."
"Do not instruct me what to do in my own house!" Ziva said coldly.
"Ziva please." He nodded towards the couch. She gave him a look then sat as far from him as possible. He took a set at the opposite end of the couch. "Ziva, when I love someone, I get scared, I run and hide and I mask it by pretending. When I am here I feel so at home, and I really enjoyed the nights we spent together, and every time we kissed, and every time I touched you I was more and more sure that I loved you and wanted to be with you."
"You left me! Remember, you left me for that girl,"
"Ziva I wanted to tell you, but if I had,"
"I'm a spy remember, I can keep secrets."
"I had to stop visiting you too, and it was a good thing I did too, La Grenouille was spying on me and if they knew about you, you could have been hurt."
"I Can look after myself Tony."
"I know, but I didn't want to risk it, and it was easier for me to pretend that I didn't love you, and I thought you didn't love me, so I left yes, but I never wanted to." Ziva started to relax, she no longer sat pushed against the edge of the set, "Tonight when you said, you loved me, I didn't know how to respond, I felt something I thought was locked away, tight enough that it would never resurface, I needed to leave and figure out what was happening before I did or said something I regretted, which I ended up doing any way." Tony slipped his hand inside his pocket. "Ziva if you love me as much as I love you you'll understand." He stood up and looked at her sitting on the couch. "Please say something." He said, Ziva stood and approached him, "Tony, I don't understand, but I know that was hard. Tony I love you, and I was hurt when you stopped visiting and started dating Jeanne, I fell in love with you long ago, and it wasn't until I met Roy that I realised how much I cared for you, I loved him because he was like you, he looked like you, ate like you and sometimes acted like you. It was when he died that I realised that I'd lost you, and it hurt me so badly, and then when you left Jeanne I hoped we could pick up where we left off yes, that you'd start coming over again. But you didn't."
"Ziva… I'm sorry." A tear ran down his face, and she instantly mirrored him with her own tears, they both reached to clear the tears from the other's faces, their hands colliding in mid air, they locked their hands together and Tony cupped Ziva's face with his other hand, they both gave a small laugh and continued to look at each other, "You know," Ziva ventured "it is ok to kiss me." She smiled and Tony lent down to kiss her, the kiss lingering, when they broke apart Tony smiled softly "Tell me, do you know how hard it is to convince a jewellery store to open for you at ten thirty at night?" Ziva looked at him confused, "well, that doesn't really matter, what matters is this," He plunged his hand into the inside pocket of his coat and produced a small red box. Ziva stared, "Ziva David, will you marry me?" Ziva looked at the ring, it was beautiful, sapphire and diamond, it reminded her of the Israeli flag, she looked at Tony who was still smiling, and back at the ring, then to Tony and a smile grew across her face "Yes, Yes Tony I will!" he slid the ring onto her slender finger, then in one sweeping movement he picked her up in an embrace, she flung her arms around his neck and buried herself in his scent, she was happy, truly for the first time in weeks, Tony lowered her to the floor and kissed her, with all the love her felt for her, and she returned it, they were together at last, comfortable, and happy, Ziva looked over her fiancé's face and thought of every time that she had kissed him and how good it felt to know that they meant as much to him as they did to her, "You know what," she said "This reminds me of?" Tony looked at her, "that movie we watched."
"Which one?"
"The one we watched the night it was raining, I cooked spaghetti, and we had ice creams and you fell asleep and then I pushed you off the couch." Ziva laughed, and Tony watched, it was so good to see her happy and content, just like she had months before, he should have seen it, but this was perfect and he wouldn't have it any other way. Ziva laughed and felt so stupid, he was Tony DiNozzo and he always would be but she should have know that he kissed her differently, his kisses meant something when he was with her. Tony picked Ziva up and plopped her down on the couch, and sat down next to her she curled up and nestled herself in under his arm, he kissed her head, and put his arm around her holding her close, this was how it was and was going to be forever, Ziva shifted herself and kissed Tony softly, and again, and again
Fade to black…………..