Chapter Twenty-Six -- An Ending of Sorts

Days passed much to Georgie's annoyance, and time wound down to the last days of school. A particularly fine day found Georgie sitting and stretching to touch her toes in the grass beside a hovering Minerva.

Siobhan and Niamh were sitting in the shade of a massive oak tree a ways off and Professors Lupin and Sprout were chatting idly on a bench they had conjured. It was all--quite unfortunately all owing to the obstacle course Minerva was forcing Georgie to run in lieu of a real exam. Georgie had more than once pondered this sadistic side of Minerva's personality. Lupin thought that the idea was the most entertaining thing he'd heard all week. Georgie wasn't speaking to him.

At least the majority of students weren't outside--perhaps they had classes, perhaps they were packing--who knew? She was just happy they hadn't turned up for the spectacle of her huffing around in shorts. Georgie was going to murder Siobhan for her big mouth....

Georgie let go of her ankles and scrambled to her feet. Minerva straightened up. "Do you understand the course?"

"Yes." Georgie replied less than excitedly.

"Chin up. This is for your own good—a personal challenge. However I'd thought you'd have been training for more than only this past week." Georgie rolled her eyes at the woman. "All right. We'll be here to cheer you on when you finish. Have fun." She winked as she produced a funny sparkling watch. "Alright...Go!"

Georgie took off at a moderate jog towards the lakeshore. Damn that woman. Damn Siobhan and damn the rest of them for coming. I know they mean well, Georgie thought to herself, but they're only embarrassing me. She looked around for a quick way to cheat.

Snape burst through the fireplace in a puff of green powder, but no one could have followed him through, on account of the lightning quick spell he cast to disconnect the portal. He didn't have time for this--he never had time for this. Damn Lucius...

Georgie reappeared from the woods a mere hour after having started. There was a dark spot of sweat on her shirt and beads were running down her chin. Fine day my ass--it's hot, she huffed on. She spit as she came into sight of the agreed-upon finish line of the oak tree. Minerva saw that and looked away in disgust. Georgie laughed to herself in pleasure. Sometimes it was so much fun to upset that woman.

She stumbled across the 'line' and Minerva alone approached her. "Congratulations. You've passed." Georgie put her hands on her knees and double-over wheezing. She cast a sideways glance up at the stately woman, and wiped sweat out of her eyes. "You wouldn't have really failed me." George stated that more than questioned.

Minerva just smiled quietly down at her. Minerva spoke of cooling down and walking around a bit before her muscles cramped up, but her gaze kept lifting to Professor Lupin sitting sandwiched between the twins on the bench.

Georgie straightened out and was able to breathe more normally. "Walk back with me, will you?" Georgie grabbed at the Professor's taffeta clad elbow. "Lord, it's too hot for black today, Minerva! Are you trying to make some sort of statement by wearing this?" They headed back towards the castle and both ladies soon forgot the scene behind them.

"No statement as you say, I jut don't feel I could pull off the sort of attire you seem to fancy in the warmer weather."

"I'll grant that, I mean this in the nicest way, but I couldn't very well see you in a tiny shirt and a pair of shorts."

Minerva patted the girl's hand laced through her arm. "I'm from nearly a different time. Young witches today are blending in with Muggles more than when I was young. Even spending time in Muggle areas, making Muggles friends, having Muggle families. When I was in school, there was a public fear that if you associated with Muggles, you'd bring misfortune down upon your family. There was Grindelwald, then there was He-Who-Must-Not-Be- Named, then he disappeared for awhile."

"Now he's back." Georgie frowned.

"Old habits are hard to kill, that's all I know." The let themselves into the building by way of the front door. Sunlight wafted down from the tall windows and from the open doors they passed along the corridor.

"There will always be some Voldemort." Georgie allowed herself to be led to what she suspected Minerva's office. Georgie's mind wandered long enough to venture a hope that there might be a cold beverage waiting. It was sort of funny how more and more conversations turned towards darker subjects these days. Only with Hagrid was she mercifully spared, but she hadn't seen much of him lately. It was quite clear that this was on everyone's minds.

"You do too lie, you know." She yawned, her mouth stretch wide, pushing shut her small dark eyes.

"I do." He commented.

"Yes, you do. And you trued to tell me you never do. The concession was nice, but never fully believed."

"Snippy aren't we? Why do you think yourself so very clever all the sudden?"

"Not all the sudden at all. I've always believed it, I just wanted to know reasons. I like reasons. You lie constantly, sometimes I can figure out why, other times I just accept the fact as another aspect of your life I can never complete comprehend. Just fine by me, mind you."

"What's your point?" He frowned, staring down his hooked nose at her.

"Just that I'm glad you've never really lied to me. I prefer your lying to Voldemort, even other people at Hogwarts who have business whatsoever ramming their fat bodies into your affairs. Lie, by all means, it's helped you to survive."

"Don't flatter yourself too much. I've lied to you as well, though being forced to reconcile myself to certain facts, in the light of day..." He tossed his head.

"I know." She smiled lightly.

"You don't approve?" He half laughed.

"I have no stone to cast. Good God, look at me! Am I above anyone else? I'm a walking nightmare. A real nobody." She laughed boisterously. "Besides you lie for all the best reasons, best intentions rather."

She found the frayed carpet corner suddenly very fascinating, and refused to meet his glaring stare. But he was not about to let her feel comfortable just yet. It was a favorite game of his. The conversation trickled off for a moment, and he allowed himself to scrutinized her rationale. He wondered why she lied.

Georgie wrapped her ratty blanket closer around herself so that it buckled her arms tight in against her sides. She wriggled her toes, belched loudly, and then shivered. The movements not lost on Severus. It was late now, and they were chatting idly about mundane things--trying to keep the mood light.

Severus glared at her as he was about to hand her a glass, but thought better of it and sat it instead on the table between them. He'd seen her spill on herself more than a few times when wrestling with her blankets, and though the clean up isn't at all difficult, he still wasn't going to set up an accident. "Good news?" He raised his eyebrows in expectation. He'd been nettling her in a way only Severus could to stop acting like she held anything of interest to him and just talk, or he'd set fire to her robes.

"I'm coming back." She started simply, with an almost shy smile.

He nodded and didn't speak. He brought the goblet up to his eyes and he spun it round in his hands, taking in the intricate detail. She watched him, knowing that he had his own time for things.

He lowered the glass and sought her eyes. "This is something many people would find perhaps unthinkable of me to say. I am..." his eyes narrowed and Georgie could almost read the effort it was taking in his eyes. It was as if, 'I can't believe I'm going to say this' was printed there, clear as day. "I am...pleased you've decided to stay to teach." She finally allowed herself to relax and to smile. Stupid how one dour man's opinion mattered so much.

He was drinking quite hard tonight, though he never lost control, that would be death or an equally dire personal failing. He always held control. Though his reactions and senses functioned just fine, his tongue was unusually loosened tonight. But that part of his mind that objected or fought this, he found had dissolved for the time being. He continued, "I am not at all pleased with our society's current evolved circumstances and the pitiable fact that it's taken such a long time to finally force Albus' hand to reinstate this position," He added sourly. Georgie wasn't going to be baited into yet another discussion of how dire the times were, and Severus picked up on this.

"Won't you feel stifled here?" He asked, handing round the goblet one again absentmindedly.

"No, I really don't think I will. I'm starting to like it here." She explained seriously.

"You like it....here?" He smirked.

"Yes, I like it here." She wagged her head at him. Yes, she would get used to this place all over again and find her own way in this funny new world of hers. At least it was hers, a place of her own.

"And your parents..."

"Why did you have to go and ask that?" Her smile dropped.

"I enjoy being difficult."

She shot him a look, "Thank you Captain Obvious." She flushed with pleasure; she'd gotten that from a movie. "No, my parents weren't as warm to the idea as you or anyone else. They were hoping I'd not choose to stick it out here--too dangerous my mother says, but you know how mothers can be."

Severus smiled for her sake.

"They were hoping...hell, I don't even know what they were hoping. Funny, isn't it?" Her gaze flew everywhere possibly else it could within the room.

"May I ask you a real question?" Severus' smile vanished and he looked all seriousness at his companion.

"Of course." She bit her lip in response.

"If there wasn't sufficient evidence towards my thinking this, I would never breech such a subject, but I wonder, are you frightened of me?" He steepled his fingers and gazed over his fingertips through her.

Georgie took her time carefully picking and wording her reply. "That is a question which I've asked myself many times. I'm afraid I cannot give a concise answer to allay whatever curiosity is eating at you. No." She frowned at her thoughts. "No, I am not frightened of you. I am frightened by sometimes how you'll react--but I bring that upon myself. You're a trifle unpredictable. I am often surprised and taken-aback. For all I know of you, I sometimes think that we've barely scratched the surface of knowing one another." She bit her lip and sought his face to perhaps gauge his feelings on what she was saying. "I sometimes feel that if I knew you, knew your thoughts and history and motivations clearer, that there might be reason for me to be frightened. But in the same breath, I don't wish to remove you from my esteem."

He nodded his understanding as she plowed on. "I feel at times that I keep myself in check with not only you, but with everyone around me. I play to strangers very well, so that no one knows it's an act. I've done that for years. It's a rare thing indeed when I am acting entirely as myself. I believe you do altogether too much of that as well. But at least you have a life-or-death excuse. Me, I just can't stand people getting really close to me."

"Why?" He smiled slightly at her showing mild incredulity.

Her eyes took on a faraway look and she smiled up at the ceiling. "I don't often share who I am, because other may not like who I am, and I'm all I have." She met his eyes. "I read that once and it stuck with me. At least I know that I'm not alone in that sentiment."

"I think you share a great deal." He pointed out to her.

"Only what I feel comfortable sharing. It's easier to fall down stairs and be the butt of a joke, than it is to admit one's needy. I'm always in control of what I share and how much I show of my true self. I don't think anyone really knows my true self. Even the bad habits and the stupid outbursts are controlled."

"And you're alright with that?" He smirked at her, imagining the shortcomings to such a philosophy.

"No problems thus far. It's all rather like flirting with everyone you know, though you don't have any one person in mind. Just really like tease then run away."

"What of the control? So far you've always had control for the most part. What if a day comes and you don't have the luxury?" He furled his brow. He was loath to admit, but it was these moments of the closest they'd gotten towards honesty, that he truly enjoyed her company.

She smiled and found his eyes. "Hopefully the real me will be able to stand up on my own two legs. Hopefully."

"Nothing ventured, nothing gained. I feel like by this admittance that, firstly, I've been misled all this year by a sneaky little chit of a witch, and that secondly, you are perhaps much cleverer than I give you credit for." Truth be told it was a delight to him.

He shot her a sidelong glance. "At times I've felt that intellectually, you've been holding back, and I've concluded that you must have your reasons for this charade. Or that you really were that naive and stupid. But this was all a ruse, set up to protect you from feeling things. Just as naive and stupid, but different." She rolled her eyes in childish annoyance.

He glared at her, nearly furious. "Pot calling the kettle black, but you cannot escape emotions and human interactions. Nobody lives without them. Trust me I've tried."

"Thanks for that, but I seem to have gotten away with quite a bit so far by living as I see fit. Life unworthy of life and all that. Harsh words, but a base sentiment. Especially rich coming from you." She choked at having actually said that aloud.

He wasn't taken aback at all by her words though. "Do as you need to do."

"I don't believe I'll see you much over the summer." Georgie played with the edging on her blanket.

Severus chuckled despite himself. "I daresay you'll survive that great calamity unscathed." He swung into full out sarcastic Severus mood. "What will you do? Cry yourself to sleep? Or perhaps daydream, or write your friend pithy postcards lying when you say 'wish you were here?' Yes, I think you'll survive just as you always have. I will do likewise. " His eyes gleamed.

She shook her head, "You're the biggest prick sometimes," she giggled. "I didn't mean that at all, but there isn't another way of expressing it! Nothing proper whatsoever. At least that I can wrap my brain around. You can be such an ass, but I'm glad you're on the right side and all. " She removed her hands from the blankets, "You know..." She lifted her goblet and still managed to point a finger at him. "You're very lucky to have me around, sir." She shivered now that her arms were exposed to the dungeon chill.

Snape waved his arm to bring a rollicking green flame to life, ignoring her rolling her eyes. So childish sometimes, they both thought of one another. He considered that they were both socially retarded for some reason or another, perhaps that's why they got on so well. He lazily lifted his glass, "To your return then?"

She lifted her glass to his, a gesture rare with them. She fingered her necklace chain with her other hand, "So will you being spying on me all summer."

"I do not spy, nor will it be all summer long." He pointed out. She always held an over-romanticized view of what he did. "You will be returning here early enough." He smirked.

"Fab." She replied half-heartedly. "I'm off to Poland first, then to Sophie's," She volunteered to Snape's surprise. "Well, just make sure that I don't fall in a ditch, or take a wrong turn on the way to Canada or something like that."

"You don't need any help from me."

"Thanks." She smiled genuinely at him. "Dumbledore told me I wasn't to bother you over the summer, so I won't."

"He did, did he?" This was news to him; he would remember to ask the old man about the meaning of that later on. "Well, you are training and I'm quite busy. Distraction would hurt both of us."

"I kinda like being a distraction."

He ignored that. "You have everything packed?"

"Yes, mother." She snapped. "After the feast tomorrow Hagrid's helping me to Hogsmeade. My things will go on to my flat in town--It's all arranged for me. This place holds a special place for me though. It's a pity I couldn't stay on a bit longer here."

"A pity," Severus repeated. Georgie was anxious to smooth things over with her parents before her training began in a little over a week. In that time she needed to meet her parents at her Aunt's house and stop by Poland to spend a weekend with a few old friends.

Severus knew he should say something. Something comforting and helpful, or wise, that she could remember and take with her. Nothing like that sprang naturally to his mind. And it wasn't like him to be so expressive. Though lately he doubted whether he knew himself at all.

"You will hear from me while you're in town. It's a promise I intend to keep."

Georgie was impressed and her face expressed this adequately. "I'd like that."

"You're not worried?"

"About that? Not as much as I'm worried about failing. They don't even compare do they? It's such a big thing, and I'm such a little person compared to the grand schemes of things: wars, and state departments, and ministries and training the next generation. It's all very heavy on me right now, but I'll survive as you say."

"Duty gets you through much, doesn't it?"

"Pity that it takes drastic measures..."

The end came and went in a mind-numbing blur. Georgie had said quick goodbyes to everyone and the quickest goodbye went to Snape who stared at her, nodded when she said goodbye, then turned on his heels and returned to his dungeons.

Hagrid alone had escorted Georgie to Hogsmeade and had burst into tears as he gruffly thumped her on the back. Georgie stiffened under the embarrassment of the scene they made standing outside of the Three Broomsticks. She felt for Hagrid, but just couldn't bring herself to show it on a public street. Besides he cried when someone swatted at a fly.

Once Hagrid had left she slipped into the Three Broomsticks for a quick...something. The place was nearly empty save for a few people huddle heads together over a couple of tables. Georgie nonchalantly scanned the room for any familiar faces, and not seeing any she proceeded to a corner table to sit by herself. Once her order had been placed, Georgie allowed herself a minute to heave a sigh of relief. It was over, all really over. Funny, how it finally pounds its way into your head that it's real. She closed her eyes and smiled to herself as she massaged her temples. What a fascinating year. She felt as if he'd experienced five years worth of madness within the short span. And how she sincerely wished she'd kept a better journal that year! She couldn't ever imagine forgetting things like meeting the twins, or the Enchanted bat Nacho during Halloween, but at some point she might. And that trip with Andrew and Lupin and Snape where they heard about....

"You seem to be thoroughly enjoying some fantasy of the mind. Care to share it?" Georgie's eyes flew open and she narrowed her eyes instantaneously at the speaker.

It was no one she'd met before, though in the same breath he seemed familiar. He was an older man—he looked to be middle-aged and impeccably dressed, with a queer sort of lecherous smile. Oh stop that! She scolded herself, the suspicions of everyone around me has been warping my mind.

"I'd rather not. It's much more fun to selfishly keep certain thoughts to one's self. Wouldn't want to shock the general population or else share too much about myself too soon. If I told who I was right off, what fun would that be?" She smiled quirkily right back.

Then to her surprise the man had the audacity to sit down at her table. "I quite agree. Besides there are certain people that I have no desire to learn more about." Damnit, she thought, He reminds me of someone...the way he drawls at the end of his sentences...and now the lumping together people....

She frowned. "Such as?"

"I'm sure we don't run in the same circles." He flicked his wrist to dismiss the idea. Georgie wanted to challenge this assumption, regardless of the fact that she knew a mere handful of people outside of her Hogwarts group, but right then her Butterbeer arrived.

"Aren't you going to get anything?" She smirked as she thought how now he must think of her--ordering a Butterbeer.

"No, I had finished an appointment with an acquaintance and I was just about to leave when I saw you walk in, a vision, and I couldn't help myself but to come see you."

She ignored the 'her being a vision' bit. Men were so insipid sometimes. And stared not at his face, but at his long blonde, almost white hair. She didn't see how he watched her down his nose, and nearly laughed at her. She drank deeply of her glass, "Well, I suppose now you've seen me."

"I have. But you haven't met me."

That's quite true. But don't you mean that we haven't exactly met?

"Noooo, I meant exactly what I said, I know who you are, but you don't know me. I felt that was an unfair advantage." She calmly set her glass down at the end of her fingertips and tried to quell that sick feeling rising in her stomach. Situations like this didn't often end well.

"Who are you?"

He laughed dryly, "Such a direct question, unfortunately will not receives such a direct answer. No, I've heard about you. We share a few common acquaintances, which strangely enough never mentioned you, so when I heard about you through entirely different channels, I thought that some day I had to meet you in person. You're to be Hogwarts newest teacher. And in a field I'm not altogether sure is necessary."

She felt he was baiting her and she didn't want to play his asinine game. "Who are you.?"

"As I said," He stretched out in his low wooded chair and brushed something off of his cloak's arm. "I've heard about you. Quite a bit actually. I'm surprised you haven't heard about me, although..." His eyes took on a far- away look and his mouth set in a grim line. "Perhaps you haven't."

Georgie allowed her mind to drift as he occupied himself with his own thoughts. He would have been handsome if he wiped that nasty haughty look off of his face.

"Well, sir," She wined, "I must be leaving."

"Yes you must, you've been tarrying here too long as it is." She nearly shrank back when he stood up abruptly. For a second she thought he might hit her. "Finish that then run away to whatever home you can find and remain there."

She shot him the lowest look she could muster, which seemed to only make him bully her even more. Some people were born to order others about, and it seemed natural for him to tell her what to do and for others to do it-- almost natural.

She stood up in defiance. Gathering her cloak about herself, she felt that she had to beat the man out of the establishment as a matter of principle or cheek.

"We will meet again, until then. Try to enjoy your time here." She wondered what the devil that was supposed to mean.

Cocky bastard..."Thank you sir, and I wish you the best...." Whatever that was supposed to mean, she knew it sounded ridiculous, but she just wanted to get going.

She felt his eyes follow her as she quickly left the table and disappeared from his sight.

Hagrid put it in mind to tell Snape that as he passed The Three Broomsticks heading back toward Hogwarts after having taken care of his business in the village, he'd seen Georgie inside sitting with Mr. Malfoy. And it was such a strange thing that he thought he ought to remember to relate it to the Potions Master, but by the time Hagrid saw Professor Snape again it had completely slipped his mind.

Severus sat inside his bedchamber; it was an odd feeling now to sit out in the lounge. He felt that even if he lit a fire the place wouldn't quite be the same. A pity and a blessing in the same breath. He had only a few minutes to spare but he felt he needed to write in his journal--an archaic habit, but one he still took seriously.

He purposefully opened a drawer in his heavy desk and produced the leather volume--this was a relatively full one--perhaps more so this year than any other year had he had so much to record: A singular occurrence. He opened the book to the next blank entry and dipped in his quill. His mind raced ahead of him. He scribbled about his experiments and the theories he hoped to test with his free time. The hopes that his schedule could now take on more consistent hours and the prospect carried his quill away. But at a pause in his writing, his gaze lifted and his spirits sank the teensiest bit. What was it all for? What was the work for? Severus knew he had miles to go before he slept, but now he felt a renewed sense of...perhaps duty or pride?...in completing those miles. He wasn't merely doing penance for his sin; he wasn't feeling altruistic for some vague Peace-on-Earth reason any longer.

He considered for a second his writing, and then wrote a most uncharacteristic thing in his journal, though it was becoming more common as he attempted more and more often to analyze his position.

I don't dislike her; that I am sure of. A funny phrase, 'sure,' coming from the likes of me. I cannot help but to be what I m, and she what she is. I think it is the unfamiliarity with the amount of emotion she forces to rise up within me. I can fight his in everyone else, but not against her. She seems to know. To read people. To annoy them. Especially me. It's no great wonder that when I say anything to her it comes out sounding cruel and curt. It's in direct response to the warning sign going off within myself. No, I don't dislike her. I wish to shut her up often, to, lock her in a cupboard, to force her to stop fidgeting ad to remain still, but it's not my place. And my trying would work adversely. It's almost a sad realization to come to seeing how this is how she will be , should I see her in a year or fifty years. She'll be fidgeting and giggling and random. Pity that she couldn't be more agreeable. I won't fool myself,: pity that she couldn't be more like me.

After all these months, it's still taken Albus to alert me as to my own thoughts on how I view her. It's uncanny how the old man simply knows things; I detest admitting that he's correct constantly. I feel as if I've gained a sister. And it's a good feeling; I cannot almost believe it myself. No Snape has ever cared for a sibling in a good way before, but I do for her. I worry for her and excuse insipid and silly behavior. I'd be damned before anyone ever found that out, but it's true.

Perhaps several hundred years from now when someone comes across my chronicled life and finds only death, ruin, coldness and regret, perhaps....perhaps, this will in some small way vindicate me from appearing to be the same unfeeling monster I once was. And still am. I doubt it will, but for me it makes all the difference in the world. I care for someone. I'm as amazed as you undeniably must be.

He looked up at nothing in particular yet wrapped his mind around a saying Georgie was fond of when feeling like showing off her Latin language skills that she'd picked up at the Institute.

Non tu scis, quom et alto puteo sursum ad summum escenderis, maximum periclum inde esse ab summo ne rursum cadas.

When you have just climbed out of a deep well and are perched on top, you are in the greatest danger of falling in again.

How appropriate. He shut the book and hid it away before snatching up his cloak and walking out to disappear away into another night of doing what he must.

Georgie did not return the next school year, though Dumbledore kept abreast of her accomplishments and continued every summer to extend to her a position as staff at Hogwarts. Snape kept in touch with her and she with he, but not to the extent they both were accustomed to or desired for.

After becoming a licensed Mediwitch ("a fucking damn good one too!"), She signed on as a Field Mediwitch for the Ministry. She was moved by the cause and felt her excellent skills ought to be employed in a more urgent manner. After the frustration of finding countless friends from the Ministry, and of course the Aurors, beyond her help or already dead, something began to grow within her. Only after a particularly close Auror friend died with his head in her lap, her helpless to do anything for him, did she recognize her sentiments for what it was--utter despair and hopelessness. "Our cause as it stands is a lost one," She'd wept. Those around her patted her shoulders and spoke pithy and appropriate words of consolation, but there was no kindred feeling.

She gradually shut down within herself and secretly hoped that an opportunity would arise where her life could change from what it was now. She really wasn't sure she could carry on as she had been....

A/N. Well, it's taken a long time yes, but I've finished the year out, and Am starting another. Let me know if you liked this one or things you might like to see. I like hearing from people. And thanks to every single person who reviewed and had the patience to read the story (it is long) and wait for the next chapters (slow in coming yes). Thank you all.