A/N

Xobit: Purely Barricade's POV, and a revamp of "Thoughts" Chappy 5 + 6 hence the title!

Chapter 6: Thoughts: Reloaded

An insistent clanging met me as I returned to our quarters. Flinching slightly I opened the closet door. Frenzy jumped out, pointedly ignored me and hurried off.

I felt bad for Frenzy. It hadn't been one of my more brilliant ideas, locking him in a closet and all, but after meeting Bumblebee on friendly terms, and then Sam… I think, to be honest, I needed to confirm that such a relationship could really function. Well that's not totally honest… I think I love both of them, but not like I love Frenzy.

If I ever thought of Frenzy as small and helpless, then what the hell was Sam? Soft and easily broken physically... but with courage unmeasured. He had singlehandedly stopped Megatron and more or less ended a war that had become pointless thousands of vorns ago.

I had held in my love and desire for Frenzy for so long, wanting to protect him. Even now I remembered Astrotrain's threats with fear. I had been lucky that Soundwave ordered us to leave Cybertron with Starscream's team. Still… they were as prejudiced and mean about Frenzy's status as everyone else, with the exception of Blackout of course. So I continued to keep my love a secret… scared that Astrotrain might find out if I did what I wanted to do.

I shook my head and pushed the past to the back of my CPU. Here among the Autobots I could finally get what I had longed for. If they could accept 'Bee and Sam, they would surely accept me and Frenzy... That is, if he would ever speak to me again!

He was avoiding me… oh, I did deserve it! I could have handled my experiment better. Still, I needed to know, I needed to feel that it was safe, not for me, but for him. At least he seemed to have found a friend in Sam; it was somewhat of a surprise since he had tried to kill the human so many times. I had too of course so… well, I suppose I understood. I was almost jealous, not of their friendship, but of the fact that he spent time with Sam and ignored me completely.

I knew him though, he was planning to get back at me. It made me twitchy. Frenzy had a devious mind when it came to revenge, and with the exception of Thundercracker no one had ever caught him. I kept my optics on him whenever I could. It drove the little spy crazy, but I would rather not be too surprised when revenge time came.

For several days he alternated between disappearing with Sam and, scarily enough, Ratchet, and playing/studying alongside Sam. Then out of the blue both of them asked us for a drive. To say I was scared… well it wasn't entirely wrong.

He was unusually quiet, only speaking to give me a few directions, mostly unnecessary since 'Bee was leading the way. As we traveled through the city and out to the district where we had seen Sam for the first time my thoughts began wandering chaotically. I hated not knowing… A large, rundown looking warehouse loomed to the side and 'Bee suddenly turned into an opening in the surrounding fence.

Inside the structure, both Sam and Frenzy got out. Asking us not to transform, they began hauling equipment out from an old metal container. I was at a loss as to what kind of revenge would need buckets, and felt uniquely stupid when 'Bee suddenly exclaimed, "You're giving us a wash?" in a delighted tone.

Frenzy gave a crackling laugh and said, "Yep, yepyepyepyep!" as he scurried about Sam, helping to prepare water, soap and sponges. 'Bee was truly exited, his frame trembling and his electrical field flaring erratically in anticipation.

Frenzy observed Sam for a moment before he started on me. Considering 'Bee's reactions, I was hovering between fear and hope. I had no way of knowing exactly what this would feel like, and got a shock when the sponge touched me. It was pleasure… pure, unadulterated pleasure!

My clever little partner, who knew me better than anyone else… he found every sensitive spot, every place that made me want to writhe. It took a surprisingly short time for him to reduce me and my paranoia to a shambled mess of quivering, moaning metal and wildly fluctuating energy fields.

I lost track of everything, even time… at one point Frenzy stopped caressing me and the loud moaning coming from 'Bee almost pulled me out of the pleasure swirling in my CPU. I heard Frenzy chirp, then he renewed his attention to me. I revved my engine and moaned, "Frenzy-y-y…" he ignored me. When he finally, sadly, stopped I was shaking so much my amour plating rattled, and keening softly.

He began pouring water over me to remove the soap foam, and the feeling woke me somewhat… enough for me to send a text message to 'Bee, ::Are we going to let them off this easy?::

::Primus, no. LOL, let's ambush them::

::Ambush?::

::'Cade! With our holograms, of course… let's give them a taste of their own medicine XD::

::ohh, right… you mean wash them?::

::yes, 'Cade *sigh* when all this is done remind me to give you a crash course in human terminology::

::…noted::

We formed our holograms and grabbed them, both of us transforming. "I think it's your turn to get clean, Frenzy," I drawled. 'Bee added, "You too, Sammy," and picked Sam up in one large hand, ignoring the boy's vehement protests. I followed his lead. These almost playful events were foreign to me.

I kept a good grip on Frenzy as I watched 'Bee strip Sam of his clothing. He used his hands ever so gently on the much smaller human, rubbing fragile skin. Sam was mortified at fist but as 'Bee's fingers traveled lower over his body he gave up on fighting. Mesmerizing as the sight was, I turned my attention to Frenzy. As careful as 'Bee had been with Sam's skin, I was with Frenzy's wires, running fingertips over and along amour seems stroking every exposed circuit.

As I began washing him, I could hear Sam's pleasure at 'Bee's hands. It was arousing, but nowhere near as arousing as the energy coming off of Frenzy as he writhed and shuddered, moaning nonsense word not quite cybertronian yet not quite earthly in origin either.

I had to have him closer and lifted him up to rest against my chest amour, feeling the tugging on my spark at having him so close to it. To my surprise his spark energy began expanding, crawling over his frame and my chest plate, caressing and sneaking into the seams at the edges of it. It felt so good that I began shaking again, moaning and pressed the small body closer to my spark while still tracing the edges of his sparse amour. When he suddenly moved, placing his hands on my chest plate and then slowly tracing the edge of my grill, I felt like it was the touch of Primus himself.

I ran the tip of one finger slowly over his helmet, knowing full well what it would do to him. I wasn't disappointed as he cried out "B-b-b-barribarribarricad-e-e-e-e…" and arched his back, clenching his hands on the edges of my grill. I couldn't keep this up for long; I had to finish it this time. My spark hurt with longing and the love I had concealed for far too long. I stopped touching him and moved him away from my chest so I could open my spark chamber. I had barely begun to move him before he exclaimed. "Nononononono! 'Cad-d-d-de please…"

Cringing inside at his despairing tone of voice, I hurried to answer him. "Don't worry, Frenzy, this time I won't stop." My voice was slurred and breathless, and I didn't care at all. I opened up my chest plate revealing my bright, pulsating spark. Frenzy's reacted by raising his hands and begging.

"Please 'Cade, pleaseplease!" The plea and the intense feelings of closeness had me groaning out loud. I could feel my legs give out under me and sat down rather abruptly, then followed through and leaned back on my free elbow and placed Frenzy on my stomach. I touched him, explored him with gentle fingers watched as energy leapt from me to him and back…

"Come on, Frenzy," My voice was slurred with static, need so great it made my spark want to leap out of its casing, and yet I had to let Frenzy take the lead in this. He was the one suffering the most, the one that didn't know WHY we both had to suffer so much! "I want this as much as you!"

It seemed that my words galvanized him. I hardly had a chance to brace myself before his hands were on my spark… it was… it…

Pleasure was too small a word, ecstasy too confining. He was mine! All mine, finally at long last… suddenly the long wait was forgotten, the loneliness and longing at an end. Pleasure expanded through my chassis as a white hot wave seemingly intent on covering the planet and maybe the solar system beyond…

When I came online again, I felt as if I had been in a solo fight against Bonecrusher and Blackout, possibly with a little Megatron thrown in just for the heck of it. Surprisingly though I felt… good! Like I had actually won said fight. Something wasn't right though… something was missing?

My hands flew to my chest and the small mech crumpled there. I sat up so fast that it trigged a couple of damage alarms. Frenzy lay in my palm, not moving and not chattering at light speed. I looked around until I locked optics with a sleepy 'Bee.

"What's up, 'Cade?"

"He's gone, 'Bee… I finally had him and now he's gone!"