"… and THEN she goes and sends me out, fully knowing that there was a seventy percent chance of me getting maimed and a fifty percent chance of me getting eaten!"
Inoue Orihime blinked as she looked over at her companion, Watanuki Kimihiro, who was in Full Rant Mode ™. Watanuki's arms, even as burdened down with the purchases for Yuuko and Orihime's own (which he insisted on carrying), were waving around like some kind of fluttery madman in a clearly agitated state. "Ano, Kimihiro-kun, seventy plus fifty adds up to one hundred and twenty percent."
Watanuki scowled. "There was about a twenty percent crossover chance that I would get maimed AND eaten."
"Oh. But you survived it anyhow, sort of like beating the odds by transforming into a giant robot with steel for arms!" proclaimed Orihime, making electronic robot motions and buzzing while swinging her arms around like pinwheels.
Watanuki blinked, still a tiny bit unused to the randomness of the girl, but shrugged it off. "Er, yeah. Sort of like that." Weighting the packages in his hands, he added "shouldn't we be getting back to Yuuko-san's place?"
"Hmm, I guess I'm done shopping for the day," said Orihime thoughtfully. "I've picked up whole wheat bread, red bean paste, leeks, spam and marmalade."
What the HECK is she going to make with that? exclaimed Watanuki but otherwise did not voice the thought, for worry he was going to offend his companion.
"Ne, Kimihiro-kun, let's shunpo the way back to Yuuko-sensei's home!"
Watanuki grimaced. "You know shunpo is what I do the wor-- hey!" Watanuki groaned as Orihime took off, vanishing from sight. With a deep sigh, and reinforcing his grip on the numerous bags, Watanuki took off after Orihime, the pair flash-stepping in and out of the crowds who only felt a strong breeze. Once or twice Watanuki nearly tripped over someone, paused to excuse himself and then took off again.
Reflect
Written by Shaun Garin
Thinking of you wherever you are…
"BASE!" proclaimed Orihime cheerfully, slapping a hand on the solid black fence that surrounded Yuuko's store. A moment later, Watanuki appeared, completely out of breath as he sunk to his knees. "Eh? Kimihiro-kun, are you okay?"
"Just… a little… out of breath," panted Watanuki.
"Aaah, I'm sorry, I forgot that you're not too good at shunpo," giggled Orihime as she let herself into Yuuko's store. "Tadaima!"
"Hime-chan is back, Hime-chan is back!" proclaimed the twinned beings known as Maru and Moro as they danced around happily. The cute black marshmallow known as Mokona leapt to Orhime's arms as she hugged it to her chest.
"You're back," greeted Yuuko as she took in Watanuki's exhausted being and Orihime's still-non-winded person. "Watanuki, did you get what I asked for?"
"Yes, I did," said Watanuki, straightening up as he pulled out a bottle of Ishikawa Brew. Yuuko snagged it and did a little happy dance, Mokona cheering from Orhime's arms "Sake, Sake!"
"I don't see what's so special about this Sake," grumbled Watanuki as he wandered over to the kitchen to store the rest of the perishables in the cavernous-like freezer.
Settling down with a thump on her plush divan, Yuuko patted the end, signalling Orihime to sit down with her. "Awww, my cute student," gushed Yuuko, nuzzling Orhime who giggled, embarrassed. "So, how many hollows did you get?"
"Two," said Orihime.
"Two only?" exclaimed Yuuko in mock-surprise. "I thought you would have gotten more, since you two were out for the day."
"Ah, Kurosaki-kun is showing around the assigned Shinigami of this area, Kuchiki Rukia-san. That, and Ishida-kun was out on patrol with Yuzu-chan after school."
"Mmm, I had forgotten that it was Ishida-kun's turn to patrol," sighed Yuuko lazily, stretching her long legs over the divan and into Orihime's lap. "So then, how is the new girl?"
"She's scary," reported Watanuki with a shiver as he came out of the kitchen with some fresh sushi rolls. "So serious."
"Maa, I doubt she's that bad, just focused," said Orihime. "Kuchiki-san seemed pretty intent on doing her job."
"Most people in her family are," said Yuuko, tilting the end of the sake bottle to her lips and taking a short drink. Yuuko did not elaborate further.
"… I still say you shouldn't let a Quincy patrol for hollows," insisted Rukia. "They…"
"Interrupt the flow of souls from point a to point b, I know I know," grumbled Ichigo as he lead Rukia around the corner and towards the riverside. "But I trust Ishida with my LIFE. I trust his judgement."
"But his powers unbalance the cycle of souls. Even you must see how dangerous that is," added Rukia for the umpteenth time, getting the feeling she was arguing with a brick wall.
"Feh," 'feh'ed Ichigo. "Sandal-hat has a whole system of retrieval system worked out. Ishida tags them first with a special ofuda and then blasts them. Sandal-hat then sends Jinta or Ururu into the Valley of Screams to fish them out, and send them along their way to Soul Society. Simple."
A vein popped out on Rukia's forehead. "That's not simple at all, bakayarou!"
"It's never failed us in the past," shrugged Ichigo.
Just then, Rukia's cell phone bleeped and she pulled it out of her skirt pocket. "Hollow, just west of here."
Ichigo peered at it and clucked his tongue. "That's all the way in Tomoeda. I'm sure we'll hear about it from Sakura-chan later."
"Another friend of yours?" inquired Rukia as the signal abruptly terminated. Right then and there, Ichigo's cell phone rang and he flipped it open.
"Yo."
Ichigo-kun, you have got to start picking these hollows up, muttered an annoyed feminine voice.
"Sorry, but there was no one close by. What about the assigned Shinigami for the district?"
A brief sigh. The guy is pretty much useless. Syaoran-kun had to blast it. You know how much I hate ghosts.
"Didn't you go and see Yuuko-san about that?" inquired Ichigo.
I DID. She asked for a later service rendered which means it's a time-release thing.
"I hate that. I'm still paying off my last debt to Yuuko-san," sighed Ichigo.
In any case, I felt a new spiritual presence appear over there a few days ago. Another Shinigami?
"Yeah, a little slip of a girl," smirked Ichigo, getting smacked upside the head by said petite woman. "Ow!"
Sounds like she's quite the handful.Bring her over sometime so we can talk shop.
"Right, right. I'll call you later, if our patrol goes into the district. See ya." Flicking off his cell, Ichigo pocketed it and gestured down the road. "C'mon, we're headed to Yuuko's place."
"Yuuko as in Ichihara Yuuko, the Witch of Dimensions?" inquired Rukia, placing the name. "Where on earth did you manage to meet up with her or get entangled with her plots?"
"She and sandal-hat go way back," said Ichigo as the pair waited for the lights to change. "Just be careful what you say around her cause she loves to inflict payment on any information that she 'hands out' for free later on."
As the light changed and the pair crossed the street, Ichigo lead Rukia down several streets until they came to a main road where large skyscrapers topped the area. There, nestled within a pair of silver buildings, a relatively large traditional store stood, surrounded by a black wall. "So this is the famous Ichihara Shop," said Rukia, running a hand across the wall. "There's so much spiritual energy emanating from the wall."
"Huh, you can see it before I point it out to you?" mused Ichigo. "You must want something from her then."
"What do you mean?"
"Only people who want something can see Yuuko's store without having to have it pointed out to them by a spiritually aware person," said Ichigo as he pushed the gate open, only to let a woman with a cloud of black smoke curling around her neck. "See that lady? She must have come to Yuuko's place for a wish of some kind, but obviously from the smoke that covers her body, you can tell that whatever issue she has will result in trouble for Watanuki later."
"Who's Watanuki? Her son?" inquired Rukia. Ichigo paused, blinked and then burst into a gut-laugh. "I didn't think that the question was THAT funny!"
"Definitely not her son," coughed Ichigo, straightening up. "Mind the door."
The gate slamming shut, Ichigo lead Rukia into the main room, pausing to remove his sneakers. "Oi!" he bellowed and suddenly, was tackled by Moro and Maru.
"Ichi-nii, Ichi-nii!" the pair chanted affectionately and Ichigo laughed, rubbing the pair on the head.
"Okay, okay you two, back off a little. Let the poor girl through; you're blocking the door." The pair pouted but allowed them to enter the room where Yuuko was fussing over Orihime for some reason or another. Ichigo privately believed that Yuuko just loved to cuddle Orihime in a way a girl would cuddle her favourite plush toy. "Hey, Yuuko."
"Ichigo-kun!" exclaimed Yuuko. "Give Yuuko-oneesan a hug!"
Rolling his eyes, Ichigo obediently went over and got grabbed in a hug. "Yuuko, choking, not breathing," gasped out Ichigo and the woman pouted before releasing him.
"And why aren't you even that friendly with me?" demanded Watanuki who had come out of the kitchen, bearing more snacks.
"Because you're her lackey," grinned Ichigo. Watanuki turned red but set down the food before he could crush the plate with the grip that was currently cracking the expensive porcelain. "Seriously Watanuki, her hugs break your spine."
"Oh poo, I wouldn't do that," scoffed Yuuko as she picked up her treat and devoured it in a gulp. "I'd just make them pop, that's all!" she added thickly through a mouthful of sweet.
"Spine pop, spine pop, yay, yay, yay!" chanted Mokona.
Rukia sidled up to Orihime and asked, "Are they ALWAYS like this? I've heard stories she's always drunk but…"
"Oh no, this is normal for Yuuko-san," giggled Orihime. "I'm Orihime Inoue. And you are?"
"Oh, uh, Kuchiki Rukia, Gotei 13. Nice to meet you Orihime-san." said Rukia politely.
"Nice to meet you too Rukia-san," smiled Orihime as she dug into the plastic bag that sat at her side. Retrieving a juice box, she held it up. "Want one? They're still cold."
Rukia took the box and inspected it. Turning it over, she pulled the straw free from the box and looked at it. "What's this for?"
"Oh silly, here! You just take the straw and unwrap it, and then poke it here into the box!" Orihime demonstrated with one of her own and Rukia copied it. Taking a tentative sip, Orihime was pleased to see the woman's expression light up. "Good huh?"
"Very good!" proclaimed Rukia. "What is this?"
"It's a juice box. People bring it for lunches if they don't want to bring a thermos to keep their drinks hot or cold." said Orihime.
"Huh. Interesting. This would make a fine addition to lunches in Soul Society."
As the girls spoke between each other, Yuuko patted the divan and Ichigo sat down. "So then, what do you think of Rukia?" inquired Yuuko.
"Serious at her work, definitely a bit of a fish out of water when it comes to working here in the real world. She's also fairly adamant about Ishida not patrolling…" Ichigo shrugged. "I think she's just giving it a try."
"Fair enough." Yuuko looked up into the distance and then Rukia's cell phone beeped. "Hollow. Several blocks away. Karin is there and Sado-kun is moving to assist."
"How can you tell that?" inquired Rukia, looking up from her dispatch orders.
Yuuko smiled and tapped the side of her nose. "I can smell it," she said mischievously.
Ichigo fished out his own cell phone and hit speed dial. Two rings later, the other end picked up just in time to hear the dying wail of a hollow. "Nothing fancy I guess?" inquired Ichigo.
No. It is just a new one. A weakling that just converted over. Do not worry, your sister is safe. Reported Yasutora Sado from the other end.
Sounds of fumbling could be heard as a younger feminine voice popped up. We've got this covered Ichi-nii. Go back to whatever you're doing. This guy was so weak, I finished him off without even having to release Tsuchikiri. Sado punched it in the head and it dazed him long enough for me to cut it in half.
"All right, but don't stay out too late. You know how freaked out the old man gets when we're out late without reporting in." Ichigo shut off the cell. "It was a newbie. Didn't even need to release Tsuchikiri."
"Tsuchikiri?" echoed Rukia. "Earth-Mist? That's impossible; there's no possible way that a zanpakutou has more than one element to it."
"Tell me about it," scoffed Ichigo. "Sandal-hat thinks it's cause Karin was the second child, that she got a blend of elements between myself and Yuzu, but when she releases, it's a twin-zanpakutou."
"Those are awfully rare anyhow," remarked Orihime. "Right sensei?"
"Right again," said Yuuko, taking a moment to cuddle Orihime. "Twin zanpakutou are incredibly rare; almost as rare as the possibility of using two or more by the same shinigami. Ichigo-kun doesn't have the ability to do so, and Yuzu-chan uses the healing aspect of her sword more."
"And Karin?"
"She's all direct. Like Ichigo really," remarked Yuuko. "I have a suspicion that if she achieves Bankai, her sword will split into two aspects. Other than that, its all in the air." Yuuko grinned and held out a hand. "Payment in full."
"WOT?!" exclaimed Rukia and Ichigo face palmed.
"I'll cover for her," sighed Ichigo. "Rukia doesn't have anything save her zanpakutou and most shinigami would give their right arm instead of giving that up."
Yuuko pouted. "Fine, you can owe me for it later Ichigo."
"And THAT," proclaimed Ichigo to Rukia, "is why you never let Yuuko explain anything to you."
"… well… crap…" floundered Rukia, still off-balance from the demand for payment.