Disclaimer: I don't own anything of Harry Potter. It all belongs to J.K Rowling.
Author's note: This will be my first attempt at a Harry Potter fic and a slash fic at that. This will take place at the end of the fifth year after Harry lost his godfather Sirius Black.
Warnings: Slash so that means male/male. If you are not comfortable with this, I strongly advice you not to continue reading. It will not be too explicitit and probably will take place further in the story but I have warned you.
Summary: Harry seeks to confront Professor Severus Snape about what he thinks Snape had to do with Sirius' death. Let's begin.
Harry Potter stared defeated at his reflection in the mirror in the boy's bathroom on the 7th floor of the castle where Hogwarts School for Wizardry and Witchcraft was located. The mirror had told him that he needed to comb his hair but when he had pulled out his wand and threatened the mirror, it had shut up.
He raised a hand to his messy black hair, messing it up even further, trying to smooth it over the lightning shaped scar that he tried to hide. His haunting green eyes looked like a small child as he gazed at himself in the mirror.
He could not gaze too long at the pale face without cursing himself. He could not stand to look at himself now. It hurt too much to see the empty green eyes looking back at his own. Days before he had lost the last person he called family.
Sirius Black, sentenced to Azkaban and one of the only wizards to escape to finish what he had started, to kill the person responsible for his family's murder. Sirius Black, his godfather and for nearly two years somebody he could confide in, somebody who understood him.
Yet now he was gone. Killed and it was all Harry's fault. No, not quite my fault. There are others responsible too. Harry found himself thinking grimly. Just days ago, he had led his friends deep within the Ministry of Magic. But it had been a trap and now Harry felt like years had gone by.
He now knew the truth but it had come at a terrible price. He now knew that he was the only one who was destined to defeat the Dark Wizard Voldemort. He had been marked by that terrible killing curse 15 years ago. The curse that had killed his mother and father and had destroyed their house but it had only marked him.
Harry shook his head, grimacing as the door creaked open and the red hair of his best friend appeared. Ron Weasly did not smile but eyed him concerned as he said. "Look mate, perhaps it is best you come out. Hermione is trying to come in, you know."
"How long have I been here then?" Harry knew his friends were worried about him but truth be told, he did not really wish to be with anybody right now. He just wanted to be alone.
He had spent his days on the healing wing near the bedside of his two best friends. Hermione Granger and Ronald Weasley. The two people who had stood beside him time and time again. Yet he could not stand their company even now when the grief was still to near and he felt too raw.
He forced a smile to his lips and then walked out with Ron. He was glad Hermione did not immediately come to pull him into a hug, for he could not stand it. He distanced himself from his muggle born friend. She was the brightest witch in their year but even she had not all the answers.
He walked back with them to the common room of Gryffindor. He tried to ignore the looks and comments of his fellow students. They had all read the Daily Prophet today, telling them about the news that lord Voldemort was back.
When Ron asked him for a chest match he shook his head, instead watching Hermione getting pounded as she promised Ron to play. Ron was good at this game, having grown up in the wizard world; he knew many things that Harry did not.
Harry's heart clenched painfully together as he faced another reality. He would soon be back with his only remaining family, the Dursley's. Harry actually shivered at that thought. Last summer he had the knowledge that he had threatened them with the fact that his godfather was alive. Now that Sirius was dead….
He could no longer stand it. Getting to his feet, he murmured something soft and fled to the deserted 5th year's dormitory. He held the tears that threatened to escape him in check and buried deep underneath the blankets, the moment he closed his eyes, the memories resurfaced.
He tossed and turned, not even hearing it when the other 4 boys in his year went to bed. Ron contemplated waking him but when he saw the dark circles underneath his friend's eyes, he did not do so. Instead the read haired boy looked on as Harry moaned Sirius' name, a sob escaping his lips before the Boy Who Lived fell asleep again.
It was some hours later, not even midnight when Harry woke up with a gasp, sitting upright in his bed. His wand was out but the only sounds were the deep breathes and occasional snores that came from his classmates. He shook his head to try and clear it from the last memory. The last time he had tried to contact Sirius.
It had backfired and yet Harry had failed to tell the order. The only order member at that time who was in the school had been his potions professor, Severus Snape. Yet Harry loathed him and he knew that Snape's hatred for Harry was no less.
Sighing Harry got up, there would be no sleep for him tonight. Silently he went to his trunk, picking up the silky cloak, his father's invisibility cloak. He slipped it on, easily slipping out into the castle's dark corridors, easing his way down.
He did not know what he would attempt to do but when he recognized where he was, he grimaced, yes it seemed fitting somehow. That the person who had taunted Sirius, causing him to come back out into the open, would now answer to Harry Potter.
The door to the private office of professor Snape was slightly ajar and Harry could hear the soft rustling of papers being turned coming from within. He drew his wand silently and pushed the cloak back from his body, placing the soft fabric in a pocket of his robe as he opened the door with his left hand, holding his wand out with his right.
The dark head snapped up, black eyes narrowing as they focussed upon Harry. Too many emotions cross the pale face before the old sneer was back into place and Severus Snape rose to his full length, coming around the desk and saying in a soft voice. "Well, Potter, coming to pay me a visit after curfew, are you?"
Harry focussed upon the face hidden behind the greasy hair as full hate and anger coursed through his veins. His hand trembled slightly as he raised his wand higher. Snape's black eyes focussed upon Harry's wand and the older wizard straightened slightly from where he was leaning against the desk. "What do you want, Potter?"
"Why?" The answer was short but it left both professor Snape and Harry surprised. Harry had not even known that was the question he wanted to ask.
"Why what, Potter! Could you kindly form a correct sentence so that we may not stand here for the remainder of the night?" Snape's voice was soft but full of amusement as the older wizard's lip curled.
"Why did you not help us when I tried to tell you that Voldemort had caught Sirius?" The boy finally shouted in frustration. "I know that you bear no love for either of us but as a fellow member of the order you were supposed to help him! You are to blame for his dead."
Professor Snape straightened and pulled out his wand, Harry recoiling quickly but the door only slammed shut behind him. He saw the hate etched in every line of his potions master's face as Snape walked closer, saying. "Do you honestly think, you foolish child, that I would have given myself away like that to Umbridge? More is at stake here then your need to protect everybody…."
"But you did not even give any indication that you had heard. You are the one who allows old grudges not to be forgotten! You cannot even put them behind you like Dumbledore asked…"
"If I may point out, Potter, I was not the only one who did not heeded the headmaster's advice. You were not very keen to even remotely try at the occlumency lessons I was to give you at his request!" Professor Snape's voice was growing softer by each passing word as he stood before Harry, black eyes holding the boy's own.
One hand was balled into the fist as the other tried to hold the wand pointed towards Snape's chest. Yet the potions master did not lower his eyes to Harry's wand for one moment, his own wand loosely hanging by his side.
"Don't you dare blame this on me, sir! I was not the one taunting Sirius…"
"No, you were the one who was lured to the ministry of magic, thus needing saving and getting Black killed in the process…." It were facts that Professor Snape was stating as his own friends had done time and time again but Harry felt his anger sprinting forth in one gigantic leap.
He brought up his wand, shouting without thinking. "Expelliarmus!" The force of the disarming spell did not only knock professor Snape's wand away but send the older wizard flying into the desk.
Harry lowered his wand, breathing heavily as Snape regained his footing, bringing one hand up to brush the blood that tickled down the side of his mouth. "Well, well, well, Potter, that I did not expect from you. Seems that you take after your father more so then I would have thought…."
The taller wizard straightened himself, turning his back on Harry to look for his wand. Something broke within the teenager as he remembered the way Sirius had once told him that it had been a pity that Harry had not been more like James. The reality of never being able to hear Sirius' voice again bit deep into him as he struggled to remain upright.
The silence was broken as Harry fell heavily upon his knees, causing Professor Snape to whirl around, wand drawn as if to ward of any attackers. But he could only see Harry as the teenager was sitting with his head bowed on both his knees, shoulders shaking.
"Dammit Potter, are you hurt?" Harry could barely hear Snape's voice through the sobs that were escaping him. He could see the blurred outline of the black robes before him until an iron grip came upon his shoulders and he was pulled to his feet. "On your feet, Potter." This time Snape's voice was softer, gentler then anything Harry had ever heard. Without thinking the younger wizard leaned forward and buried himself in the black robes before him, crying his heart out and not noticing how the owner of the robes stiffened at the contact before laying a cautious hand atop of Harry's head.
I am leaving you here for now. So please tell me what you wish to see and review of course. I hope I did not do something too much out of character.