A Tale of Tak and Tenn

Alright, see what you've driven me to? I vowed that I would never do character slash. Don't say "What about those two other works", because those were failed romances. I don't support character slash, because it offends Mr. Vasquez, and because I don't believe in the paltry concept of "love", and believe it to be, as I said in one story "The greatest lie man has ever made for himself. Heedless of my own desires, I write this. P.T. Barnum once said "Give the people what they want." My duty as an author is to do so. My science-based fanfictions were flops, and even my social commentary "The Blood Red Flag of Peace" was as popular as icepops in Antarctica. So here is a story you're bound to like. I may retire after this one. As they say, only time will tell the tale. Rated M for slash and some language. I don't own Invader Zim, or any of the characters of the show. Given the popularity of my writing, if I did, I'd be poor right now. So enjoy, what is to be the most f-ed up story you'll ever hear from me...

CHAPTER 1: Lost and Found

Tak stepped from her crashed escape pod into the hot, dry air. She squinted her large, purple eyes in the fierce sun, and looked around. Nothingness. Just barren rock. She sighed.

"Great." She commented to herself. "Just perfect. I had to crash on the only rock in this entire system with no life. Where am I, anyway?" No sense in standing around waiting to die. Tak took one last look at her pod, which had been her prison and her home for the last six months, and began walking across the scorching wasteland, in a survival-driven search of food, water, shelter, lifeforms, anything.

After an exhausting hour of wandering in the heat, she came to a ravine, what seemed to be the remnant of an ancient river. She wandered cautiously into the ravine. Where there is water, there is life. The first survival rule. Tak nervously glanced around. She felt as if someone or something were watching her, but she could see nothing. That made her even more tense. The air seemed almost electrically charged, sending shivers down Tak's back. She shook it all off, and walked on.

As she rounded a bend, she could see a pool of clear water ahead. Tak hurried to the water, then removed the black glove from her left hand. She gently touched a finger to the water to check for any impurities which would result in nasty burns (as all irkens know). The water seemed fine, and Tak cautiously brought a handful to her mouth and sipped it. It was clean, fresh. Sighing contentedly, Tak began drinking greedily from the pool, sating the thirst she had worked up on her sojorn through the desert. Her curled antennae perked up, as her senses picked up on a nearby...something. Tak lept to her feet, and spun around.

They floated in midair, hovering about twenty feet away. Two of them. They glowed with a bluish white light, indicating through their luminescence and semi-transparency, that they were beings composed of pure energy. Tak stood frozen. Unarmed, and unsure of her terrain, she felt fear rising. She well knew the capabilities of such beings. She began backing away slowly.

"Um," Tak muttered lowly. "Oh, shit. This isn't good." A beam of light shot from one of the beings, hitting the ground next to Tak. She lept to the side as the beam burned the rock black. Pure energy, all right. "Fuck!" Tak yelped and began running. She looked over her shoulder to see the beings floating slowly after her. One of the beings fired another blast, hitting the ground several meters behind her. 'At least I'm out-distancing them' she thought. She ran, dodging pools of water and boulders, trying to put as much distance between herself and the beings as possible.

As Tak rounded another bend, the ground seemed to give way beneath her feet. She cried out as her boots sank into a pool of wet earth. She attempted to walk out, but the ground seemed to re-solidify around her legs.

"Shit! Shit!" Tak exclaimed as she tried to escape. She pulled at her legs, which were sunk knee-deep in the pool. No luck. She turned her head to see the beings rounding the bend. "Fuck!" She cried out. The beings hovered closer. "Get away!" Tak commanded. "I'm an Irken Invader. You can't do this!" One being drew close. It seemed to brighten as if it were absorbing energy from the air around it. Tak knew what was coming. "Please, No!" She cringed, ready for the blast. She heard a blast, but realized that she was still alive. She opened her eyes. The being was quickly dissipating. Another blast sounded from somewhere behind her, and Tak heard the other being cry out in a shrill scream, which ended abruptly. Tak heard footsteps approaching from behind.

"Who's there?" She called out. "Show yourself."

"I knew you were Irken." A female voice said. "It's O.K. I'm here to help." A female Irken walked to the side of the pool, allowing Tak to get a look at her. She was Tak's height, but had bright red eyes, the most common color among Irkens. Her uniform showed that she was an invader, and Tak could tell, just from appearances, that this female was a little younger than she was.

"Who are you?" Tak asked. The invader giggled.

"Sorry. My name is Tenn. Invader Tenn, as it is. You?"

"Tak." Tak replied, still trying to free herself. She heard the other irken gasp.

"The Tak?" Tenn asked. "Wow. I've heard about you!" Tak stopped her struggling and looked up with a raised eyebrow.

"You have?"

"Of course. You have a reputation at the training academy. They said you were the most promising soldier there. You're pretty much everything an invader wants to be. The tale about you breaking the hand-to-hand combat instructor's arm...it's a legend among students, you know." Tak chuckled lightly.

"It is, huh?"

"Mm, hmm. And then you just dissapeared. I heard you missed the test, and got put on janitorial. Then you built your own ship, and just vanished. What happened?"

"It's a long story." Tak said. "And I'm kind of...ungh...stuck at the moment." Tenn grinned, embarassed.

"Sorry. Let me get you out." She recovered a rope from her PAK, and tossed one end to Tak. Tak grabbed it, and Tenn slowly pulled Tak from the grip of the mud. On stable ground, Tenn helped Tak to her feet. "Damn sinkholes." Tenn said. "Whole area's covered in 'em. Anyway, we'd better get out of here before any more Meekrobians show up.

"Ah," Tak said. "That's where I am. Meekrob." Tenn smiled at her. Tenn led Tak down a trail.

"Where did you think you were? I was assigned to Meekrob. They never told me how hard beings of energy are to defeat. I had to reconfigure my standard issue pistol to fire elecromagnetic pulse blasts, which disrupts their energy field, basically killing them."

"You did all that yourself?" Tak asked. "You must be pretty damn intelligent to engineer something like that. I'm impressed." Tenn stopped, and turned to Tak.

"That means so much coming from you." Tenn said sweetly. "Thank you." Tak smiled. Tenn was sweet, she had to admit. And she had saved her, afterall.

"No," Tak replied, as they began walking again. "Thank you. You did rescue me after all."

"It was nothing." Tenn said.

"It was something, all right." Tak corrected. "No one's ever helped me before. The last thing I wanted was to die alone on some miserable rock." Tenn looked quizzically at Tak.

"I would think you would have an army of friends and stuff." Tenn commented. Tak sighed, kicking a small pebble.

"You would think so, huh?" Tak muttered. Tenn looked at her sadly.

"I guess...I'm your friend." Tenn said. "I mean, I think you're one of the greatest Irkens who ever lived, and I've always wanted to meet you...gee, this sounds creepy, doesn't it?" Tak laughed lightly.

"It's okay. I'd be happy to have you as a friend, Tenn." Tenn smiled happily, then glanced around nervously, and cleared her throat.

"My base is just ahead. We'll get you cleaned up and call you a ship."

"Nonono!" Tak exclaimed. "You can't do that. I left my post to prove myself as an invader. Ah, it was a such a fiasco. If the Tallest find out where I am, I'll be working the salt mines on Urded 9 until my skin peels off. Please, you can't them know I'm here." Tenn put a hand on her shoulder.

"You're secret's safe with me."