Hey everyone. This is just a little blurb I came up with in about a forty five minute period. I have no idea where it came from or why I decided I needed to write it down, but here it is. Axel being cute and sad and molesting a sleeping Roxas. Well, not really, but you know. It doesn't have anything to do with my other Akuroku story, though I guess it could technically be a prequel to it, and I realized I do have a line in this that's very similar to something I wrote in the other, but you know. Anyways, enjoy. Oh, the title also happens to be the same as a Hikaru Utada song, so credit to Hikki for using her song title. Though, technically, I only realized this after I wrote the title. Well, enough rambling.

Story: In My Room

Author: ILuvMamo-chan

Rating: PG-13 for a few swear words and kisses

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts or Axel and Roxas.

Axel knew he had no business in this room. It wasn't as if the instructions from the Superior were "Break into his room and accost him while he's asleep". In fact, he'd had plenty of time during the day to confront the boy, but he hadn't done anything. It wasn't as if Roxas didn't know of his existence. In fact, the boy was probably more on his guard than ever. Yet here he was, staring into number XIII's sleeping face.

Said face was anything but relaxed for the moment. Axel knew what was happening to him while he slept, but didn't want to admit it to himself. That damn somebody of Roxas'. He could feel the burn marks he was inflicting on his own fingers from his palms as he balled both hands into fists. He'd love to set something on fire, but he doubted Roxas would appreciate a charred room when he woke up.

As anther shiver racked Roxas' body Axel forced himself to calm down and maintain attention on his best friend. He could see the words "Kairi" and "Riku" form on the boy's sleeping lips, which he not only wanted to kiss, but prevent them from spouting such nonsense. He didn't need that other person's memories. Didn't need any of that at all.

Axel sat on the bed next to Roxas and ran a comforting hand through his blond hair. At the contact, Roxas' trembling lips immediately calmed and his body relaxed. Axel couldn't help the smile that graced his own face as he whispered soothingly, "That's right Roxas. Forget all about him. He doesn't need you, and you certainly don't need him."

Axel didn't dare say the other's name aloud, but it ran through his head over and over. 'Sora'. Not that the keyblade master was a bad kid. Far from it actually. If Axel could admit it, his kind heart and determination rather amused him, and if things were different, he may have even been tempted to help the kid out. But as things stood, Sora's very existence was threatening the existence of the only thing he gave a damn about in any world. And if that meant Sora sleeping forever and Roxas staying blissfully unaware that the boy was around, so be it. He'd bring Roxas with him and keep him safe.

As a sigh escaped Roxas' mouth, Axel brought his attention back to him. His hand becoming brave, he let his gloved fingers rove over XIII's cheek, then trace over his lips. Quickly deciding his gloves were seriously in the way he shed both objects and went back to memorizing Roxas' face with his fingers. He'd forgotten how smooth and soft his best friend's skin was. How inviting those lips were.

Unable to ignore the messages his body was giving him, Axel tempted fate and himself and leaned down to kiss the lips his own knew all too well. At the contact, the blood and fire that ran through his veins began to work double time. It'd been far too long since he'd had such a pleasure. Unable to control his emotions or body, he pressed Roxas deeper into the mattress as he renewed the force of his kiss. He knew it was stupid to do so, but he'd never been terribly good at controlling his actions. He continued to press himself against Roxas, his hands balling in the tan sheets as Roxas' fish globe cast a light glow over the two.

At a twitch from Roxas' lips Axel immediately pulled himself away, afraid he'd wake him up and have to tear himself away and make a quick exit. However, he became intrigued as those lips once again began to form a word. A strange word considering all that had happened. "Axel."

Axel felt a tremor run through his whole body as Roxas repeated his name over and over, steadily increasing in volume. Finally, a hand slowly crept out and grasped his wrist. "Axel, is that you?"

Axel, unable to find his voice, nodded slowly. But as he realized that Roxas' eyes were still tightly closed, he finally whispered. "Yeah Rox, it's me."

"I knew it."

Roxas voice was small, and it finally occurred to Axel that he was still sleeping. He felt the grip on his wrist tighten, but the voice that came from the key of destiny's throat was still no stronger.

"I'm scared Axel. This is all an illusion, isn't it? This town, these people, all the memories I think I have…"

Axel put his hand over Roxas' where he gripped him, wondering which "Roxas" he was really talking to. "I guess it is."

"I think I always knew what was going on, deep down. I know that I'm not even really here right now. Tomorrow, it'll be like I never even knew you were here."

Axel slowly brought the hand he grasped up to his face, and in an uncharacteristic show of affection put it to his lips. "Oh God Rox, it really is you, isn't it?"

Eyes closed, a smile slowly crept onto the boys lips. "I'm not some dusk, if that's what you mean."

"Why'd you leave Roxas? I could have got you any answer you needed. I could have protected you. I could have gotten rid…" Axel stopped mid-sentence. If Roxas somehow did remember this conversation tomorrow morning, he didn't need him to go running off to find his other. Sora needed to stay where he was. Asleep.

"Axel, I told you why I left. It didn't make it any easier with you knowing, did it?"

"Roxas, let's go back. When you wake up, I'll explain it all and we can…"

"No." For a sleeping person, Roxas' voice was firm and coherent. "I don't want to know anything like that tomorrow, and I doubt I'd believe a word from you anyway. I may have lost my memories, but it didn't make me any less stubborn."

Axel moved quickly, pinning Roxas' hand to the bed, as well as his body. "Roxas, I love you. Why the hell do you think I'd be here right now? Xemnas has probably got every spy in his horde looking for me and I'll be damned if they take me back before I have you. We don't have hearts and I still seek you out. Doesn't that mean something?"

"Axel, have you ever just wanted to be normal?"

Axel shifted his weight at the words, and Roxas managed to snake his arms around the robe clad figure, eyes still securely closed. "You always think it's such a boring word with such a boring meaning, but can you imagine what it would be like? We could have…so much…lain here, just like this…Ax…let me…"

Realizing that he was losing Roxas once again to sleep and ignorance, Axel shook his shoulder gently. "What Rox? Tell me." At no response, Axel got more frustrated. "Tell ME!" The last word was louder and much more forceful, the tremor of his voice shaking the boy next to him.

After a long pause, Roxas finally spoke again. "Axel, if we had been normal, I could have been here with you just like this all the time. We wouldn't need to fight or worry about existence or hearts; it could have been just me and you. No organization. No weapons. Just us."

Axel felt his chest constrict and he pulled Roxas close, burying his face in the younger man's neck. "It could be that way anyhow."

"Liar."

Axel kissed the neck he was finding solace in, and he heard a low groan from the boy under him. He knew Roxas was right, but he couldn't just let go. He couldn't just let his best friend, his lover, fade into some boy that had no other claim to existence than a real heart and some key weapon meant to save the worlds from obscurity. He hated him for that, and even more so because he didn't really hate him at all. He couldn't hate Sora. Not when Roxas and he were so much alike.

"You know, I love you too Axel. It probably isn't fair of me to say so, but I just want you to know that."

Axel's hand splayed across the chest that he had managed to find under Roxas' t-shirt, gliding across his rib cage before resting at the small of his back. "Shut up Roxas. If this is all the time I get with you right now, just let me hold you. Let me hold you knowing that you know exactly who I am and that you want to be held by me."

"Yeah yeah. Jerk."

Axel held him close for hours, kissing him gently from time to time, rubbing circles on his skin and eliciting small moans of approval from his blond companion. And at some point during the night, he knew that "Roxas" had once again left him. He didn't stop his attentions to Roxas' sleeping form, but he knew instinctively that he was as good as alone in the room. The boy next to him no longer knew who he was, but he couldn't let go.

Roxas awoke the next morning warmer than usual. His bed was mussed as if someone else had been lying next to him, and his shirt had been practically pulled off.

"Wonder what I dreamed about to have moved around this much." Roxas muttered to himself aloud. He sniffed loudly as a familiar smell assailed his nose. He shivered and brought his arms closer, feeling cold and more alone than usual.

"Axel." The name floated from his lips, unbidden and yet totally expected. The man had been on his mind ever since he'd practically been beaten to a pulp by him when he interrupted the struggle match. He'd seemed furious that Roxas didn't know him. Which he didn't. Or at least, he didn't think he did.

Everything was changing, and it wasn't going to change back. With a reluctance to go out into the world that seemed to give him so much grief lately, Roxas got dressed and left his room with more finality than he could understand. He felt like he was leaving more than just his room. There was something lingering there, a smell that he knew too well; whispered words that he couldn't remember, and lips that knew him in a way no one else did.

The last day…

Thanks for reading all. Please review. I know it's a pain in the butt and you have more Akuroku stories you could be reading, but reviewing makes a writer's day. Believe you me. Thanks!