Pairing/Characters: Naffy, Luffy, Nami, Ussop, Franky, Chopper

Word Count: 842

Genre: Angst and Romance

Rating: PG Just some angsty stuff

Summary: 'He could feel the wood begin crack under his fingers. Franky would find another mysteriously splintered railing in the morning.'

Edited on 2007 08 28

Cowardice

He doesn't know what to do.

The raven haired captain clutched the railing. His back was hunched over, his arms and the railing were the only things left supporting him.

His hand would brush her waist as all twenty crew members would try and squeeze through one tiny doorway. She would look up at him in disbelief, for moment thinking he had purposely touched her. The shock would fade in a matter seconds and frown would replace smile. He really wished he could just tell her he wanted so much more than just a brush.

He gave a strangled cry, it was almost gasp, almost a choked sob. He glared angry at the stars reflections in the water, the waves made them look like they're dancing. Why can they be happy when he can't?

Sometimes he would walk into the library and see sitting at a table, surrounded by books as she worked on her latest map. The tip of her tongue would poke out between her lips in concentration, she didn't even notice the door hinges squeak as he walked out the room.

He could feel the wood begin crack under his fingers. Franky would find another mysteriously splintered railing in the morning.

On the rare occasions they were alone, she would look into his eyes and open her mouth to say something, but the words never left her tongue. He would just stare at her, wishing he had the courage to say those long awaited words. Instead he would complain about his anger and walk, always looking back.

He could feel the wood digging into his palms and fingers, Chopper would have to bandage his hands again in the morning but he didn't care. The pain distracted him at least it tried too. Nothing could distract his thoughts from his cowardice.

He would pass her room as he walked down the hall to his bedroom. Every night he would raise his hand in attempt to knock. Every night his hand would fall to his side.

He could face shadow-stealing giants, crazed merman and power hungry sandmen but he couldn't tell her how he felt. A piece of wood is lodged in his hand, he would take it out later to avoid Franky's suspicions.

After Chopper had bandage his wounds and left, he would close his eyes and wait. She would come to his bed side late at night after a battle. Most times she would just pull up a chair and watch him sleep. He was never asleep at these times. He would fight constantly to keep his breathing regular, so not to inform he was indeed awake. Sometimes her hands would trace his bandages and her ghostly touches would always brush over the scar under his eye. When she did trace his scar, a fire would ignite in his chest and a soft moan would escape his throat. He always managed to make it sound like he was having a nightmare, she would leave abruptly after his moan fearing that he would wake up and find her.

He was coward, nothing more, nothing less. Why couldn't he just open his eyes and tell her everything?

Across the room their eyes would lock, he would stare into her brown orbs and she would stare into his. Their sight never faltering, it seemed like the world had stopped just so they could stare at each other. A crew member would come into their sights and the connection would be lost.

Franky would ramble on about his broken and bloody railings, saying he would catch the fiend who did this. Chopper would constantly ask how his hands always got so bloody and why he had so many splinters in his hands, Luffy never really answered his questions. During Franky's and Chopper's integration's, Ussop would give his captain a sad, understanding look.

Sometimes he caught her starring at him, she would blushed furiously and turn her head back to her map and scribble hastily.

A drop of water slid down his cheek, they were getting close to Raftel. Soon he would be Pirate King and almost everyone would have completed their dreams. After partying for many days, the crew would eventually separate and go their own ways. He would be left alone, sure some crew members would hang around him for awhile but she would have left to complete her world map. He could just imagine it.

She would be standing at the end of the docks, preparing her little dinghy. The mast and jib would be raised, the white cloths clashing with the blue water. He would just stand there, he would smile, say goodbye, wish her good luck and she would smile, the disappointed painted in her eyes. And then, she would be gone ,and he would just sit on the docks all day, praying that she forgot something and would come back.

She wouldn't come back.

That would be the end of his adventure, the destruction of his new dream. His dream to have an orange haired, money loving, fiery tempered queen.

It's been two years since the realization of his new dream.

And he still didn't know what to do.

Definition of Cowardice: Ignoble fear in the face of danger or pain.

Taken from Notes: I was sitting on the bus and I was thinking about that fic by Uozumi (One of my all time faves) and I'm just like 'what if Luffy couldn't tell Nami his feelings?' And I had a free thirty minutes when I got home and I came up with this, that was yesterday. Dam, busy summers suck! Anyhoo I noticed the community was a bit dead lately so I decided to share this with you all, I don't think I'm gonna post it on Too lazy, now I have to go babysit