AN: Well at long last here is a continuation of my Maintenance Manuals. Hope this is up to par with the others. Kouga was being stupid and hard to write. From this point on I will be updating the manuals with the Sesshomaru one being the primary story. In other words you will find other units under the title of Sesshomaru. Miroku will be by himself however because he's a pervert and because I don't feel like reloading him. So enjoy guys and review me with who you want next! Provided I have enough inspiration I'll go with whoever is most popular.

Owner's Guide and Maintenance Manual to KOUGA

Start your dance of happiness! You are the ecstatic recipient of a KOUGA unit! To make the most of this brazen, pony-tailed wolf with a mouth that can never shut up, please read the following instructions carefully.

Technical Specifications:

Name: KOUGA

Sex: Male

Age: ?? (although he acts five)

Height: 6'3

Weight 197 lb

Manufacturer: Princely Pups

Your KOUGA comes with the following accessories:

-chest plate

-fur kilt

-fur armbands (X2)

-fur shoulder pads (X2)

-fur leg warmers/sandals (X2)

-katana (X1) (that he never uses…)

-pony-tail tie (X1)

-inhaler (to help clear his airway after running in that whirlwind of dust)

-The Ultimate Treadmill

-Shikon shards (X2)

Note: When you receive your KOUGA you may notice that his legs are constantly twitching due to excess energy from the Shikon shards. This is entirely normal. Your KOUGA is not damaged in any way.

Programming:

KOUGA units, while they are sometimes (well all the time really) annoying, they are very useful in a variety of functions.

Rickshaw Carrier: Since all KOUGAs can run really fast over long distances, they are perfect for transportation services! Get carted around in style and impress your friends with his speed! (That is if they do not have a SESSHOMARU in transformed mode…that's way cooler.) Note: KOUGAs have a carrying capacity of one ton. More than that will cause a hernia and is not highly recommended.

Rent-a-Date (if you're a girl): KOUGA units are notoriously desperate for mates and will happily act as yours if you can prove you can see Shikon shards (See FAQ for details). However, after that one date KOUGAs tend to get horribly clingy (See trouble shooting).

Entertainment: KOUGAs are amazingly fun to watch due to their excessive egos and big mouths. Just set your KOUGA unit up with an INUYASHA and KAGOME unit (others are optional) and watch it hit the fan! Sits will abound, fists (or feet) will fly and increasingly uninventive insults will make your boring day become obsolete! Add a few HARPY units to make it even better! Warning: The addition of any HARPY units may result in an injured KOUGA, a sulking INUYASHA and a fuming KAGOME.

Your KOUGA unit comes with the following modes:

Obnoxiously Twitchy (default): As a result of the two Shikon shards in his legs and a diet mostly consisting of sugar, your KOUGA unit is unable to stand still for any set amount of time. In this mode KOUGAs tend to sprint extremely fast, cause destructive whirlwinds and leave GINTAS and HAKKAKUs behind.

Sexist Sweet Talker (for female owners only): In this mode KOUGA units will constantly refer to their owner as "his woman" despite any attempts to convince him otherwise. KOUGAs are mysteriously deaf to any other units or people until they finish trying to charm their targets. KAGOMES are extremely popular victims which annoy INUYASHAs to no end.

Immature Schoolboy (locked): This mode entails KOUGAs throwing unimaginative insults and blowing raspberries at anyone who challenges him. KOUGAs will not listen to reason (big surprise) and will insist on fighting to ensure his male pride. INUYASHA units particularly bring out this stubborn streak. (See FAQ to unlock).

Alternative mode (locked): KOUGA units become noticeably less twitchy in this mode and are capable of settling down with AYAME units. Although they will not stop flirting with KAGOMES or baiting INUYASHAs, the Alternative mode allows the owner to stop tearing their hair out from KOUGA overload.

Relations to Other Units:

KOUGAs tend to get irritating no matter how patient or forgiving the other units or you are. Therefore, contact with other units should be kept fairly minimal (which shouldn't be a problem since KOUGAs tend to leave without warning for long periods of time).

GINTA and HAKKAKU: These are the wolf lackeys that endlessly trail after the wolf prince due to some sort of misguided loyalty. Although KOUGAs do not usually acknowledge either of them, they will protect them if necessary because they are the only ones left from his clan.

KAGOME: Every KOUGA's dream mate and most unrealistic prospect. After learning of KAGOME's innate talent for finding Shikon shards KOUGA fell in love with her and has courted (plagued) her ever since. KAGOMEs tolerate KOUGAs unless they are in Immature Schoolboy mode. If the KOUGA is in this mode, slight damage to the unit may occur.

INUYASHA: The rival for love of all KOUGAs, both units do not normally get along unless facing a NARAKU unit. Most interaction between them consists of rather crude language, kicking in the face and badly aimed kaze no kizus. For this reason, both units should always be supervised by a KAGOME unit.

KAGURA: KOUGAs loathe KAGURA units due to their penchant of slaughtering KOUGA's packmates and clan. Do not have the units engage unless you want your KOUGA unit to go through a substantial amount of stress and beatings.

Cleaning:

Your KOUGA is perfectly able to groom and clean himself without any outside help. Trying to do so will most likely cause the KOUGA to feel resentful since he is not a pervert (that we know of). Special soap for fleas may be required for some of the units.

Feeding and Rest:

KOUGAs can fend for themselves in regards to cooking because they prefer to hunt and eat their meat raw. Several boars should be released into a nearby forest for best results. However, any sweets in the vicinity will promptly be consumed regardless of whether permission was given to do so. KOUGAs sleep for 9 hours at the least due to crashes from overdosing on sugar.

Disposal:

Unfortunately, KOUGAs require a lot of patience to deal with and may become too wearisome to keep around. To dispose of your unit have a KAGURA or NARAKU unit in Sadistic mode take care of the problem. Note that KAGOMEs and INUYASHAs should not be near by otherwise they will interfere and rescue the KOUGA.

FAQ:

Question: I thought all KOUGA units were desperate for a mate but I can't even get him to go out with me! What can I do to convince him?

Answer: First you have to prove you can see Shikon shards. We recommend purchasing/finding a rose quartz stone, hiding it beforehand in a room and then pointing it out to the KOUGA. Once he manages to get it, the KOUGA will grace you with unswerving loyalty. Repeat as many times as necessary.

Question: How do I unlock the Immature Schoolboy mode? I'm seriously bored and want to see some battling!

Answer: Simply get an INUYASHA to interact with your KOUGA. Their clashing personalities will automatically push your KOUGA into the mode. Getting him out of it however is a different story (see trouble shooting).

Question: My KOUGA won't shut up about me being his woman even though I'm a guy! My friends won't stop laughing at me!

Answer: Purchase a KAGOME to divert his attentions, otherwise refer to the following disposal method above. As for your friends laughing, you could buy a NARAKU unit to extract revenge at your convenience. Note: Any revenge via a NARAKU unit is likely to get you double crossed and killed.

Question: How do I unlock the Alternative mode? My KOUGA is driving me nuts!

Answer: Extract the Shikon shards embedded in your KOUGA's legs using tweezers or by enlisting the help of a NARAKU. Warning: Using a NARAKU for the extraction may cause permanent injury to your KOUGA from infection because NARAKUs are not very hygienic.

Trouble Shooting:

Problem: After going out with my KOUGA once he won't ever leave me alone and won't take no for an answer!

Solution: Find another potential mate (preferably an Alternative SESSHOMARU) and make out with him in front of your KOUGA. If he doesn't get that message you're probably screwed. If this seems too cruel buy a KAGOME unit to soften the blow.

Problem: My KOUGA just won't shut up. I'm ready to tear out my eardrums without anesthetic.

Solution: Sorry that can't be fixed. KOUGAs are by nature that way. Look above for the recommended disposal.

Problem: My KOUGA won't stop giving me the fisheye and calling me a piece of dog crap. Is it because I wear my Inuyasha cosplay outfit all the time?

Solution: Yep. Try wearing something else instead and preferably not red.

Problem: This KOUGA unit is permanently stuck on Immature Schoolboy for some reason. I have no idea how to fix it.

Solution: Remove any INUYASHA units from the vicinity and have a SANGO help out with her Hiraikotsu attachment. Even hard heads crack under enough pressure.

With the proper guidance and care your KOUGA unit will be able to flirt with ease while remaining oblivious to any death signals sent towards his way courtesy of any other units. His warranty is good for only 2 years because of his ability to infuriate the most patient being. Please contact our mailing address for further information.