Title: It's not over.
Author: Nikki, Dutchie, whatever floats your boat.
Disclaimer: MINE! (not.)
Summary: "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You must hate me." Calleigh said." Not a million fights can make me hate you, and you know that." Ryan replied. "I thought you were dead. Blown up." "I'm alright. A bit shaken and a tad dirty, but okay." [CaRWash
A/N: Spoilers for the CSI:Miami book Harm for the Holidays: Misgiving', cause I loved the necklace. The million fights quote was shamelessly stolen from secondhand serenade's 'broken'. The inspiration for this song was their song 'It's not over', which I used in the fic as well.
My tears run down like razorblades
And no, I'm not the one to blame
It's you ' or is it me?
And all the words we never say
Come out and now we're all ashamed
And there's no sense in playing games
When you've done all you can do
But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?
We had the chance to make it
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over
I wish that I could take it back
But it's over
I lose myself in all these fights
I lose my sense of wrong and right
I cry, I cry
It's shaking from the pain that's in my head
I just wanna crawl into my bed
And throw away the life I led
But I won't let it die, but I won't let it die
But now it's over, it's over, why is it over?
We had the chance to make it
Now it's over, it's over, it can't be over
I wish that I could take it back
It started out like any other day for Calleigh Duquesne. She awoke from her alarm clock beeping and squeezed her eyes shut for the ray of sunlight sneaking through the crack in the curtains, falling right over her eyes. After silently listening to the news and weather report, she sat up and turned off the radio. And that's when she noticed that the other side of the bed was empty. Memories drifted back into her mind as she walked into the kitchen and turned on the coffee machine. She went for a quick shower and when she came back into the kitchen, fully dressed, a pot of hot steaming coffee was waiting for her. She poured herself a cup and took a sip, the hot liquid streaming down her throat. The routine always got her ready for work. In her line of duty she couldn't afford to be lethargic. Errors couldn't be made, or she would lose her job, and the lab would lose its credibility. Not to mention a killer would get away. But even the refreshing shower combined with her now second cup of coffee couldn't keep her mind from wondering today.
The fight had been ridiculous, Ryan Wolfe knew. He had said things he didn't mean, and she had said things she didn't mean. Or at least he hoped that she hadn't meant them. But the fact that this was the first time in months that he'd woken up alone hadn't escaped his mind. Sighing deeply he took a bite of his cereal, only to find out he wasn't hungry. He knew his stomach would protest sooner or later, but he placed the bowl in the sink. It was strange, he thought, normally he would've washed it off immediately, but even his OCD, better known as obsessive compulsive disorder, seemed to sense that he felt miserable enough without cleaning everything until it shone so bright it hurt his eyes. Some people had made fun of him for it. She had accepted it as something that made him who he was. And he had loved her for it. They hadn't takes separate cars to work for a long, long time, he realized as he was waiting for a red traffic light. It felt strange not to flip a coin to decide who was going to drive and who was going to sit in the passenger's seat. He'd just sat down behind the wheel and drove away.
Calleigh arrived at the lab first. She didn't inform anyone of her situation. Her private life was, and had always been, nobody's business but hers. Sometimes she let a little bit slip, but most of the time she regretted it only seconds after telling it. So she put on a fake smile, even though she knew everyone could see through it. He had been a master in that. Seeing through her fake smile, her serious face and her cold tone. No. Don't think about that now. Don't think about him now. Just focus. Fake smile, serious face, cold tone. You've done it a million times, and you're going to do it again. She walked towards the ballistics lab. Maybe if she told Horatio she was backed up, he wouldn't send her out on a case. But she knew better. She was never backed up. Always on schedule, always up-to-date. He wouldn't fall for her excuse. She believed in karma, but she also believed that karma was going to bite her in the ass today. And she probably deserved it too. Yes, she definitely deserved it. She had said terrible things. Things that, if said to her, would've broken her heart, shattered it into a thousand pieces.
Ryan arrived at the same time as Eric did. He knew conversation was inevitable if he got out of the car. So he pretended to be looking for something. For good measure, he pretended to receive a phone call as well. It worked, because Eric looked at him, then turned and made his way inside. At least Ryan would have a little more time to think of a response that actually made sense to any questions his colleagues might have for him. Or God forbid, Calleigh herself. He'd thought about calling in sick, but he realized that Calleigh would then have to think of a diagnosis for him, and no matter how bad their fight had been, how much she'd hurt him, he didn't want to put her in that position. Walking inside, he almost regretted that decision. Almost. He saw Horatio signing for him to come into his office. Did he know? Did Calleigh tell him? Then he saw Eric, Calleigh and Natalia approaching from the other side and he understood that Horatio knew nothing. They were just getting their cases assigned. He thought for a second he might've sighed in relief.
"Good morning everyone," Horatio started. Everyone muttered their greetings. Ryan let his eyes glide past every face in the room. Horatio, sitting behind his desk, looked calm and collected as ever. If he noticed something, he was doing a good job of hiding it. Eric, who was sitting half on the table in the room, wasn't throwing angry looks his way, so Ryan assumed he didn't know either. Natalia, standing next to Eric with her arms crossed, was focused on Horatio. But Ryan didn't think Calleigh would tell her. Calleigh…God she was beautiful in black. She stared at the ground. Perhaps sensing his glance, she looked up, their eyes connecting. Ryan quickly looked away. When he dared to glance again, her eyes were directed to the floor, just like before. After a few seconds of silence, Horatio continued.
"Eric," Eric looked at him, "your diving skills are needed at the marina. A father and a son, spending some quality time there, caught a rather strange fish. It had toes."
Eric snickered and Calleigh did too. Whether it was because she really thought it was funny or to hide the fact that something was wrong, she didn't know.
"You might find it useful to take Miss Boa Vista with you."
Calleigh's heart fell. That ruled out two persons she could work with instead of with Ryan.
"Mr. Wolfe," Horatio resumed, "I'd like you to come with me. Shots were heard in an abandoned factory near Miami Beach. Calleigh, a CSI was requested downtown. A bookstore was robbed. They have surveillance; it will be an easy case."
Ryan hadn't felt so relieved since he was hired at the lab. Calleigh gave a nod and left. The look in her eyes did not go unnoticed by Ryan. She was just as, if not more, relieved as he was. Natalia and Eric smiled at him on their way out.
"Okay H…" He said. His voice didn't sound like his own at all. "Who does the factory belong to?" He continued, swallowing.
"It's unclear. The city of Miami, I think. No one really uses it but bored teens."
"Bored teens with guns?" Ryan asked.
"That's for us to find out, Mr. Wolfe…that's for us to find out.
Horatio had been right; Calleigh's case was an easy one. The thief hadn't worn gloves; his face was clearly visible on the surveillance tape, and the store owner was a woman with a memory like an elephant. Tripp and she were ready to interrogate him only an hour later. Normally Calleigh had a dislike for cases like these, she felt like they were an insult to their skills, but today, she was ready to embrace the case with open arms.
"So, let me get this straight. You rob a bookstore, but you don't wear gloves or a mask. Are you just stupid, or did you want to get caught?" Frank asked.
"I'm not stupid." A boy, probably not older than about 16, said.
"I'll be the judge of that. So you wanted to get caught?"
"Kind of."
"Kind of? Come on kid, there's a tuna sandwich waiting for me. Why would anyone want to rob a bookstore in the first place, and get caught doing so in the second place?"
Calleigh didn't mind that Frank was taking the lead on the interrogation. She knew that he liked to do it, he was good at it, and it only meant she didn't have to concentrate all that much.
"It doesn't matter, does it? You're supposed to find the 'who' and the 'how', not the 'why'."
"Look at you, think you know the justice system. You may have a point, but I'm a curious person so please, surprise me."
"Why do you care? I did it. Lock me away."
This caught Calleigh's attention. She had had one other case like this, way back when she was still a rookie in patrol. She remembered a boy refusing to say why he robbed and old lady. She was so concentrated on finding out why he did it; one of their own got killed because he was ambushed. The kid had just been a diversion. She had felt miserable for 5 weeks after the accident.
Her mind made overtime. The marina was too out in the open to be the target. But an abandoned factory near Miami Beach could very well be…
She stood up and signed to Frank to follow her. Eric and Natalia just came back from their scene and Calleigh quickly briefed them all. They all entered the interrogation room again and Calleigh hit the table.
"What time?" She demanded.
"I have no idea what you're talking about."
"Oh, spare me. You know exactly what I'm talking about. Don't play dumb. Now you tell me when it's going to happen right now, or I will make sure that the rest of your life is worse than hell, you got me?"
"You have about ten minutes." The boy said, his eyes big.
They hurried to the Hummers.
"Why the attitude Cal?" Eric asked.
"Bad memories. And Ryan and I broke up. She confessed, never stopping to run.
"I'm sorry." Eric said.
"Me too. And if something happens to him I'll never forgive myself."
"You broke up with him?"
"Worse. I said I never loved him in the first place."
"Ouch."
"I know, I know. You drive. As fast as you can."
And Eric did. The last time he'd raced like this was when he was bringing Ryan to the E.R. when someone had shot a nail into the skin next to his eye. He didn't want to bring a dead body to the morgue this time.
Ryan stared out of the passenger's seat window. He knew that Horatio knew that he was distracted. Maybe he could talk…but Horatio would most likely take Calleigh's side. After all they'd been friends for like forever, and he…he was just Mr. Wolfe. Yet still it felt like a good idea to ask Horatio's opinion. He was like a father to Calleigh and knew her better than anyone else.
"Horatio…"
"Mr. Wolfe?"
"I…I could turn this into a hypothetical conversation, it always works with my uncle, but probably not on you, so…"
"What's on your mind son?"
And that broke all Ryan's barriers. He told Horatio about the fight, the things they'd said and how they'd broken up.
"…and you have to believe me, I didn't mean to hurt her, I love her so much, but she hurt me so much too. And I just don't know what to do now."
Horatio didn't speak.
"I understand you probably think I'm the biggest jerk in history, I probably am the biggest jerk in history, but…." His voice faded away.
Finally, Horatio spoke. "Calleigh has a tendency to say things she doesn't mean when she's upset. We've learned to ignore her in times like that."
"Yeah, but how can I ignore her when she's literally throwing things at me to get me out of the door?"
"I don't know Mr. Wolfe, but I do know that Calleigh will come around if you give it time."
Ryan agreed silently and kept quiet until they arrived at the factory. "I'll get the kits." He said. "You do that."
Thanks to traffic, their drive had taken a lot longer than it usually would have. Ryan wondered if that was the reason there wasn't a police officer around. But that wouldn't explain the lack of crime scene tape on the scene.
"Mr. Wolfe, grab your gun." Horatio said, clearly also sensing something was off. Ryan did as he was told, his mind switching to patrol mood in a matter of seconds.
He entered after Horatio. The factory was large, but dark inside. Slowly getting used to it, Ryan stepped left and took cover behind a pile of wooden boxes. Somewhere outside he heard a car stop.
Calleigh was the first person out of the car. Their trip was way shorter than Horatio and Ryan's, because they'd taken the inner road. Eric, Natalia and Frank left the car too and together they yelled: "Horatio, Ryan, get the hell out of there, it's a trick!"
Ryan's head jerked at the same time the gunfire started. Shocked, Calleigh wanted to run inside, but Eric grabbed her arm. "Please…" She exclaimed.
Inside, Ryan tried to position himself so that he could shoot without getting shot himself, but he wasn't sure where Horatio was, and he didn't want to risk shooting his boss.
Calleigh was supposed to keep herself together, but she was far from that point. Tears pricked in her eyes and even though she knew Eric was right in holding her back, there was nothing more she wanted to do than run in and help. The conversation she'd had with Ryan after he froze in a shootout kept playing in her head.
"Mr. Wolfe, pull back out." Horatio yelled. "We're getting out of here."
Ryan saw a flash of red hair, and a flash of a gun. Aiming the best he could, he shot in the direction of the gun. And that was when the explosion sounded.
Natalia gasped and Calleigh let out a cry. Eric and Frank swore. Next, they saw Horatio running out of the building, which had now caught on fire.
"H!" Eric yelled, grabbing his arm when he reached them. "Where's Wolfe? Horatio, where is Ryan?" He asked.
"Inside." Horatio responded. "He shot at someone. I think there was gunpowder or gasoline stalled in there."
Calleigh stared at the factory in horror. This couldn't be happening. This wasn't right; it wasn't how it was supposed to be. "My God, don't let this be it. Please, please, don't let this be true."
And then Ryan came stumbling out of the factory, and it collapsed partly behind him. On first sight there wasn't any blood on him, but his face was dirty with black smudges and there was a tear in his shirt from his shoulder to halfway his chest.
"Oh God, Ryan."
Calleigh started moving towards him, started to run. She'd asked God for another chance and she'd got it. She got it and she was planning on using it the best she could. Reaching him, she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him.
"You stupid, stupid idiot!"
Ryan wrapped his arms around her as well and placed a hand between her shoulder blades, pulling her closer to him.
"I love you too Cal."
The rest of the team thought this was a good moment to leave them alone, so they brought Horatio to one of the Hummers to sit down while they waited for the ambulance Natalia called.
"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. You must hate me." Calleigh said.
"Not a million fights can make me hate you, and you know that." Ryan replied.
"I thought you were dead. Blown up."
"I'm alright. A bit shaken and a tad dirty, but okay."
Calleigh brushed her fingers over his cheek, trying to rub away the black smudge, but only resulting in making it worse.
"Can you ever forgive me?" She asked softly.
"It depends." Ryan said. Calleigh's eyes watered. "Did you mean the things you said?" He asked.
"I said many things. Some I meant, most I didn't."
"You never loved me in the first place?"
Calleigh took a step back. Tears were leaking down her cheeks now.
"That was a lie. I didn't mean it. I never should've said it, and I'm sorry. I don't know what to do to make it up to you."
"Prove it to me."
"P…prove?"
Ryan wiped away some of the tears on her face.
"Prove to me that you love me. Right here, right now."
"What do you want me to do?"
"That's up to you Calleigh. As long as you convince me."
Shaking her head, she smiled unexpectedly. She ran her fingers through his hair and tiptoed, cupping his cheek. Slowly their lips met. Calleigh threw all her passion and desire into the kiss, hoping it would be enough to convince him. But she knew his goal was actually to convince her. Because he didn't need to be convinced of their love. He knew it was there. She couldn't believe she had doubted it.
She pulled back slowly, giving him another kiss right after. "I love you Ryan. I really love you."
"Well…you have me convinced. I have a surprise for you."
Ryan reached into his pocket and took out a gold necklace with a bullet. He'd bought it for her for secret Santa once. They'd gotten together not long after that.
"How did you get that?"
"You threw it at my head when you tried to get me to leave, remember?"
"Oh. Yeah."
Ryan smiled and clicked the locket around her neck. "It's okay Cal. We're okay. Aren't we?"
"Yeah…we're okay."
"Dinner at my place tonight?"
"Sounds lovely babe."
She took his hand and led him to the ambulance that had just arrived. He needed to be checked out, but Calleigh knew he was alright. They were alright.
And neither of them could help but think they weren't going to wake up alone tomorrow.
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart
Don't say this won't last forever
You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart
Don't tell me that we will never be together
We could be, over and over
We could be, forever
I'm falling apart, I'm falling apart
Don't say this won't last forever
You're breaking my heart, you're breaking my heart
Don't tell me that we will never be together
We could be, over and over
We could be, forever
It's not over, it's not over, it's never over
Unless you let it take you
It's not over, it's not over, it's not over
Unless you let it break you
It's not over
A/N: I didn't explain the rest of the case because I didn't think anyone would care. After all, they're always targeting Horatio. I didn't explain the fight either because I couldn't think of anything they could fight over. Use your own imagination on that. Now tell me what you thought!