PROLOGUE:

One year. It had been one year since their mom…and wife…died of cancer. One year of trying to piece their lives back together. One year of insecurities about where they stood in each other lives. One year…it was the hardest any of them had ever lived.

Alan Eppes, father of an FBI agent and a CalSi professor, lay in bed and opened his eyes; they rested on the right side of the bed…that was now empty. Tears came to his eyes as he realized that seeing the empty space had yet to get easier. 'I miss you my love.'

The man stayed starring until his alarm went off ten minutes later. Alan quickly turned off the alarm and stood up. He went to wall that held his calendar…the date sticking out though there were no markings on it. Today was the one year anniversary of his wife's death.

Today he and his two sons, Don and Charlie, would come together and mourn the passing of the women they all loved. Alan and Charlie would cry. Don would stand strong never breaking for even a moment.

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ONE WEEK LATER

With a sigh, Alan woke up and went straight to the bathroom where he showered and got dressed. As he started downstairs he saw Charlie's room door still shut which could only mean one thing…

"Charlie, it's time to get up." Alan stood by his youngest bed and shook him awake.

"I'm up dad." The voice was muffled but Alan allowed it.

When he got downstairs Alan could smell breakfast being made. His eyes showed his confusion as he stepped into the kitchen.

"Don…what are you doing?"

Don turned and gave his father a grin, "Well dad, it's called cooking. It's when a person or persons take food that is raw and used this lovely contraption here, called a stove, and make the food un-raw."

"All right smart ass, you just keep cooking. You're brother should be…" Alan's voice trailed off as he and Don were interrupted by a series of thumps. "I'll be back."

Alan ran up the stairs and into Charlie's room. He found his son throwing some school books around, clearly unaware that his father was in the room with him.

"…stupid, idiotic, no good for nothing books. Don't know why the heck I put up with you anyways…" Charlie raised another book fully intending to throw it when it was pulled out of his hands.

"D-dad…what's going on?" Charlie's voice was hesitant.

"Why don't you tell me?" Alan asked sarcastically.

Charlie shrugged his shoulders and gathered his books up quickly. He couldn't explain his feeling to himself let alone his father. All he knew was that he was angry…almost as angry as he had been when he tested his father the year before. Charlie frowned at that thought and gave his backside a quick rub. It had taken almost two days before he was able to sit comfortably after Don's 'loving attention'.

Alan could feel a headache starting to form, "Charles it's too early in the day for an attitude. Do you understand?"

Charlie glared at his father and nodded, "What ever; I got to go CalSi."

"Charlie…" Allen's sentence was cut off by Don yelling that breakfast was ready.

Alan motioned for Charlie to lead the way. Watching his youngest son walk downstairs he sighed to himself, 'It's gonna be one of those days.'

By the time he got downstairs, a whole minute behind his son, both boys were arguing. Alan said nothing as he listened to his youngest whine about not eating breakfast and his oldest demand that the younger eat. It was no surprise when Don won the argument.

Charlie sat down and began to eat as fast he could. He didn't slow down until Don grabbed his wrist and held it firmly in his hands.

"Slow down before you choke Charlie."

"What? First you tell me to eat and then you tell me not to…make up your freakin mind all ready." Charlie stood up and dashed out of the house.

Don turned to his dad in confusion, "Are you just going to let him leave?"

"What do you want me to do Don?" Alan asked with a hint of anger in his voice.

Don, with all the calm he could muster, put down the dished he'd been bringing to the table and turned to his dad. "Talk to him dad; he's losing himself again. The last time it happened it ended up with me putting him over my knee remember? I'm not doing it again…it's your turn."

Don walked back into the kitchen wanting his to give his dad time to think. Alan closed his eyes and placed his head in his hands; his headache was definitely getting worse. He knew Don was right Charlie had been testing him all week. He would have had to be blind not to see that his youngest was hurting. He looked up when Don came back into the room.

"Let's just give him some more time; it's only been a week Don." Alan's eyes pleaded with his oldest to understand.

Don nodded his head understanding what his dad was saying; he didn't like it but as he told Charlie before, he would respect it. Father and son sat down and ate breakfast with Alan insisting on doing the clean up when they were done.

"You go on to work Donnie. Don't worry about your brother; I'll handle him, I promise." Alan's voice was firm.

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Alan kept himself busy after Don had left. He was worried about his youngest son but wanted to give the boy a chance to come to him. He'd just finished eating lunch and was sitting in his favorite chair, fully intent to read and relax, when the phone rang.

"Hello?"

"Hey Alan, its Larry; I – I know Charles sick but I was ah wondering if I could talk to him?" Larry's was hesitant to ask knowing that Alan tended to go into, what his sons called, Papa Bear mode.

"What are you talking about? Charlie's not home; he went to CalSi at around 7 this morning." Confusion and worry were etched into Alan's voice.

"Oh dear…" Larry trailed off. 'This certainly isn't good.' He thought to himself.

"Larry, how long has my son been missing work?" Alan demanded to know.

"I've been taking care of his classes all week. I'm so sorry Alan; I hope I didn't get Charles into any trouble."

"No Larry; you didn't get him in any trouble. I'll have him call you when I find him."

Larry's thank you was cut off by Alan abruptly hanging up the phone. Alan wasted no time in calling his oldest.

"Don Eppes…"

"Donnie, Charlie's not at work!" Alan all but yelled; the fear evident in his voice.

"Dad, slow down. What are you talking about?" Don asked.

"Larry just called me; Charlie's been telling him that he's home sick. Larry needed something and called. We don't know where he is…and I tried his cell phone."

"Calm down dad; I'll go around and look for him." Don's voice was calm.

"Bring him home Donnie." Alan's voice was pleading.

"I will…try not to worry." Don told his father, hoping that his words would calm the shaken man.

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It had been two hours and there was still no sign of the youngest Eppes. Don gave a frustrated growl. 'If he's not hurt or kidnapped he won't sit ever again.' Don mused to himself. He was startled when his cell phone rang.

"Eppes…"

"Hey Don, it's Ted Ross, I just thought I'd call and tell you Charlie's here." Ross laughed.

"What! I've been looking for him for two hours now." Don couldn't stop the frustration from showing in his voice.

"Easy boy; I didn't know he was missing or I would've called soon. I saw the time and realized he'd been here for a while. You want me to bring him home for you?"

"No sir, I'm on my way over now; thank you." Don replied with respect in his voice.

Don drove quickly to Ross' bar. He and Charlie had met Mr. Ross after Charlie had caused trouble and broken a few items at the bar. Don had taken Charlie back the next morning so he could apologize and so that he, Don, could make restitution. After that Mr. Ross had quickly became a friend of the Eppes family.

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"Hey Mr. Ross; where's he at?" Don stopped to shake the older man's hand.

"I put in the back room. Take him home and let his dad deal with him." Mr. Ross' voice was firm letting Don know what he already suspected…Charlie was once again testing their father.

Don went to the backroom and ten minutes later he and Charlie emerged, said good bye, and left for home.

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The ride home was silent. When they pulled up to the house Don walked Charlie in. Alan pounced on his son; hugging him and finally allowing his tears to fall. Don said nothing until his dad started to hug him.

Pulling away Don said through clenched teeth, "I have to go back to work. I can't come back for supper; I have to make up the time I spent looking for him."

As Don left Alan finally realized what his oldest had tried telling him that morning. Turning back to look at Charlie, whose eyes held both confusion and fear, Alan was suddenly hit with a realization.

Charlie was testing him…not because he didn't feel loved but because he wanted to know he was forgiven. He'd spent the last three months of his mother's life hiding in the garage working on an unsolvable math equation. Alan and Don hadn't understood and had at time gotten angry…but his mother…his mother had understood.

Now a year later Charlie needed to know that his father had forgiven him. Charlie had spent the first few months fearing his father hadn't loved him; Alan had been to far gone into his own grief. Don spanking him had let him know that Don, at least, forgave him.

'I did nothing,' Alan thought wryly. 'That changes now.'

"Charles Edward Eppes, what were you thinking?" Alan's voice was stern.

Charlie looked at him in shock. "What do you mean?"

"What do I mean?" Alan asked. "I know you weren't home this week yet apparently you weren't at work either. Where were you?"

"Where was I? Gee dad last time I looked I was an adult and you know what? You had no say so over my life!" Charlie was yelling.

Alan shook his head in disbelief before pulling his son face down over his lap. He began to swat as he lectured.

"I warned you about what would happen if you ever pulled something like this again. It seems to me, little boy, you thought I was joking; rest assured I wasn't. You had better drop your attitude because I'm tired of it! You've never been allowed to pull half of what you've been pulling; nothings changed because you've gotten older."

The swats continued to rain down. Charlie started to wiggle around, feeling himself getting angrier at being treated like child with every swat.

"I don't know what you're talking about! You can't do this!"

Alan shook his head in dismay. 'I hoped I wouldn't have to,' was his thought as he stopped spanking his son long enough to pull down the boys jeans and boxers.

"NOO!!" Charlie yelled.

His cries went unnoticed as Alan started to swat once again, this time on an unprotected backside.

"You didn't do anything wrong. Let's go down the list shall we?" swat, swat, swat

"First threw a book," swat, swat, swat "and broke a window." swat, swat, swat

"You didn't," swat, swat, swat "go to work this week." swat, swat, swat

"You lied to Larry." swat, swat, swat "You lied to me." swat, swat, swat

"You didn't answer," swat, swat, swat "your cell phone." swat, swat, swat

"You threw a tantrum this morning." swat, swat, swat "Do I really need to keep going Charles?" swat, swat, swat

"OW! No sir; please…ah…stop…OW…dad! I'm sorry!" Charlie hung his head and sobbed.

Hearing his son sob broke Alan's heart. He swatted twice more and then stopped. He rubbed slow circles on the crying boys' back.

"It's ok Charlie; I got you. It's ok son; I'm here."

When Charlie finally began to quiet down Alan helped him stand and fix his clothes. He pulled Charlie onto his lap making sure that the boy's backside didn't touch anything. He firmly yet gently held onto Charlie's chin.

"I love you Charlie and so does your brother. We won't let anything happen to you but you have to help us. If something's wrong, tell us. We can't help if we don't know what's going on. We're not going anywhere Charlie…I promise." Alan's voice was gentle as he spoke.

Charlie got teary eyed and started to cry softly again. He felt his father pull him close, tucking his head under his chin. Alan began to hum softly and soon Charlie was asleep.

Alan knew his youngest was technically too old to be held in such a manner but at that moment he didn't care. He looked up only when he head the door open. 'Donnie," he mouthed.

Don looked at his father and smiled. Don may have been angry when he left but he'd calmed down enough to realize that his baby brother was going to need him. He sat so that when he woke, Charlie could see him. The two oldest Eppes' men sat in comfortable silence.

EPOLOGUE:

Charlie woke from his nap an hour later; he was embarrassed to find himself on his father lap but neither his father nor Don made a big deal about it. It had been a hard week for the Eppes men but they went on with their lives. Charlie knew he was both loved and forgiven…and for all them that was the only thing that mattered.

THE END