I reached for the book I was reading and opened it to the last page I read. The entire time I read I thought of him why did he leave me and why did he not love me any more? I longed for him to hold me in his arms again and tell me how much he missed me. Especially when it had only been half an hour.
The last time I had seen him he told me those harsh words I swore I would never repeat again. Even though he said that he didn't love me to live a normal life it was impossible now.
Four months since he left I didn't want to live anymore. My life was and is worthless without my bronze haired angel. I went to Victoria and she was happy to kill me ,but she left me to an eternity of heartbreak.
My entire vampire life has and probably will be spent alone. Thinking of what was and what could have been. If only I had not wanted to become a vampire when he wanted me to stay human. I might have died ,but he wouldn't have left me.
When I was turned I ran to Alaska to the Denali where I learned control. I found my cottage that I live in now. It sits in the middle of nowhere in Alaska. All by myself. I had no need for electricity, groceries or other human necessities.
I began to think about what I would do if Edward ever found me again. Would I slap him for leaving me like he did or would I welcome him back with open arms. It was a mystery and my depression wouldn't end on minor thoughts of happiness.
I felt the thirst come to me like it had for 80 years now. I knew that I needed to go hunting soon. I changed my clothes to gym shorts and tank-top. I ran out the door and came to my favorite clearing. I stood on the edge and waited for something to come through the brush.
A bear came out to the creek that ran through the middle of the clearing and began to take a drink. Venom started to drip down my throat and I leaped onto the bears back. I sunk my teeth in and began to drink deeply and more deeply.
When the bear laid down dead at my feet I smelled them I ran back to the sanctity of my small cottage and slammed the door. I took a shower with the water as hot as it would go and scrubbed the dirt and blood of my skin. I had just gotten dressed when I heard a knock at my door.
Reluctantly I opened it and my bronze haired angel stood in front of me. I suddenly felt angry and grabbed his shirt and yanked him into the cottage. And slammed his back into a nearby wall.
"Why are you here?!" I half-yelled sternly and my anger coursed through me.
He grabbed hold of my shirt and slammed me into the wall behind me.
"Why aren't you dead?!" he yelled matching my tone.
We went back and forth slam after slam into walls.
"Why did you really leave?!" I yelled.
"Because I love you!" He yelled.
"If you love me why didn't you come visit or call it isn't like I could forget someone I love as much as you!" I wasn't going to give up on this.
"I wasn't going to damn your soul."he answered his voice quieting.
I dropped my hands from his shirt and he dropped his from mine.
"Well you didn't I basically damned my own."I said hugging myself as I remembered the incident.
"How?"
"I let Victoria bite me, because she wanted me dead and she just let me live forever." Evil witch I thought to myself.
"You became suicidal when I left?" He asked sadly.
"Yes, and I'm sick of living alone." I said my hole in my chest filling up again as Edward put his arms around me.
He opened the door and Carlisle, Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, and Jasper walked single file through my door.
A semi-circle formed around Edward and I. And Alice bounded up to me and hugged me in a sisterly love. Emmett threw his arms around me also and picked me up off the floor. Esme also hugged me, then Carlisle, Jasper, and the last person I expected, Rosalie.