Disclaimer: JE owns the Characters. The story is mine. I just like to fantasize.

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God hates me. I know this for a fact. My day was proof positive that he hates me. I can't really blame Him. I haven't been to a church service in, like, five years. I've been busy. Give me a break! I pray when I'm in trouble. Doesn't that count for something?

My name is Stephanie Plum. I'm thirty- three years old and I live in Trenton, New Jersey. I currently work for my cousin Vinnie. He owns Vincent Plum Bail Bonds. I'm a bond enforcement agent. Better known as a bounty hunter. No, I'm nothing like Dog. He's got a lot more muscle and a closer relationship with God then I do. I'm okay with that. I spend my days going after people who fail to appear. We refer to them as FTAs.

I'm privileged to work with two of my best friends. Connie, Vinnie's receptionist. And Lula, Vinnie's file clerk. Lula doesn't file much. She usually rides shot gun with me to aid in my efforts of being a bounty hunter. We aren't very orthodox, but we usually get our guy.

I'm currently sitting in my Grandma Mazur's Buick, looking at the gates to the RangeMan garage, while I'm thinking about my day. I had just been through a bad day. I am angry and in pain. I just couldn't decide if I really wanted to go in, or not.

Ring. I looked down at my cell phone. Tank.

"Yo," I said, when I answered my phone.

"Are you going to come in, or are you just going to sit there all night?"

"I'm not sure yet," I said, as I looked up at the camera mounted to the entrance of the garage. I waved and then heard Tank laugh.

"Have a bad day?" Tank asked.

"I don't know why you're asking. You already now that I did," I said as I slouched down in the driver's seat. "How's your hand?"

"It'll be alright. I'm in the control room. Come on up whenever you're ready," Tank said and then hung up.

I blew out a long breath and put my phone back in my purse. Tank was always watching me. He knew the events of my day and had been there for me. He had been my rock today. I'm very grateful that I had found an ally in my overwhelmingly large body guard.

I had made several mistakes today. The first, was getting out of bed. The second, was leaving Lula at the office. The third, was getting out of bed. I should have listened to Smart Stephanie. She had said that I was burning myself out. She said that I should take a day off. She told me to stay in bed. I chose to listen to Stupid Stephanie who had said that I was on a roll. In the last week I had tracked down and picked up fourteen FTAs. I had twenty thousand dollars in my bank account. Surely, I could have taken the day off.

I could have stayed in Joe's bed all day with Bob. Joe is my boyfriend. Bob is his big, orange dog. Joe is a Trenton cop. He's a good man and was letting me stay with him while my supper, Dillon, was doing some renovations to my apartment. The four week renovation is now in it's tenth week. Evidently, a drywall man ran into asbestos. That's not a good thing to have in your apartment, right? Joe had tried several times in the past ten weeks to get me to let go of the apartment. I'm just not ready for that kind of commitment. I need my own space.

I've gotten off track.

I slowly rolled out of bed this morning after I heard Joe head out. I took a leisurely shower, paying extra attention while I shaved my legs. I did the hair thing. I swiped on some mascara amd then stood back to look at myself. I was feeling a little off this morning, so I added an extra layer of mascara and threw on some lipstick. I threw on a pair of jeans and a black tank top. I walked over to the closet and fished out a pair of black, army issued boots that Tank had given me for my birthday last month. I deamed myself ready and headed out.

I made a quick pit stop at the bakery just down the street from the bail bonds office. I took my time walking up and down the bakery case. I had noticed that the woman behind the counter kept looking out the front windows. I turned around and looked, but I didn't see anything.

"Are you waiting for someone?" I asked when I turned back to the woman.

"Where's the really hot guy that always kisses you in here?" she asked as she peered out the windows.

"Sorry. He's out of town. I'll take a dozen Boston Cremes," I said to the woman.

I'm a little annoyed with the bakery lady. I haven't been set on fire by Ranger since I started living with Joe. That may have to do with the fact that I told him to back off. I was getting confused. One minute, he was showing me the soft under belly of the masked avenger. Then, the next minute, he was closed off and out the door. I couldn't take being yoyoed back and forth.

I got my doughnuts and slowly made my way to the office. The bakery lady had thrown me a curve ball. It had been awhile since I thought about Ranger. I was starting to miss him a little by the time I walked into the office. I dropped the box of doughnuts on Connie's desk.

"You okay?" Connie asked as she opened the box and fished out a chocolate doughnut. "You look pretty angry. Are you fighting with Joe?"

"No. I think that I'm having an 'off' day," I said as I grabbed a doughnut. "Do you have anything for me?"

"Two new skips," Connie said as she handed me two files from off the top of her desk. "You look kinda tired. Why don't you take the day off?"

"It's Friday. I'll take the weekend off," I said as I took the files and walked over to the ugly couch that sat opposite of Connie's desk.

"I didn't say that you could take Saturday off," Vinnie shouted from behind the closed door of his office.

Connie and I sat perfectly still. Suddenly, Vinnie's statement hit us both at the same time. I jumped up from my seat to help Connie search her desk. I hit pay dirt. Vinnie was getting better at hiding his bugs. He had placed it on the back of Connie's computer. He had even painted it to match the off white color of the desk top. I pulled it off and did a high five with Connie and followed it with a little happy dance. I took the little microphone and put it to my mouth. I then let out a blood curdling scream before I dropped it into Connie's coffee cup.

"That still doesn't mean that you get Saturday off," Vinnie shouted.

"What?" I shouted. "Are you going to fire me for taking a Saturday off?"

Silence. I guess I won this little battle. I knew that Vinnie needed me. I was the only thing that he had next to the 'Slut Puppy'. Joyce. No matter how much Vinnie hated it, I was better. During the last three years that I had worked for Vinnie, I had shown the most improvement in the last six months. It was taking me less time to get the skips, which meant that Vinnie wasn't losing any money. When Vinnie's in the black, I'm in the black, and everything is good.

"Are you going to do anything fun this weekend?" Connie asked.

"Nope," I said as I sat back down on the couch. "I'm going to catch up on some sleep. Then, I'm going to catch up on some house work. Joe and I have been so busy lately that the house looks like a tornado hit it. Plus, I'm running out of clean clothes."

"Saturday night is karaoke night. Call me if you want to hook up."

"Okay. Where's Lula?" I asked as I suddenly realized that it was pretty quiet in the office.

"Doctors appointment."

"That's a new one," I said with an eye roll.

Connie did an eye roll as well and then picked up her nail file to do her daily inspection.

"Well, I'm off to be a bad ass bounty hunter. I'll see you later. Have Lula call me when she gets back," I said as I picked up my files and headed to the door.

"Catcha later," Connie said with a mindless wave as she continued to inspect her nails.

I walked out to my brand new red Jeep Liberty and climbed behind the wheel. I threw my purse on the passenger seat and looked at my two only skips. For once, I was all caught up except the two that had come in this morning. I opened my first file and smiled at the face that looked up at me.

Mooner.

I looked down at my watch. Nine a.m. Mooner and Dougie don't usually get up before eleven, but I may be able to get them up with breakfast. As if on cue, my stomach growled. I just realized that I only had one doughnut. McDonald's it is.

I hit the drive thru and ordered a shit load of food. I was pretty sure, from a recent experience, that they would be hungry after their wake up hits of the wacky tabacky. I wound my way through the Burg to Mooner's house. I grabbed my purse and all of the food and walked right through the front door. Mooner never locks up. I sat all of the food on the coffee table in the living room and then headed up the stairs.

I went into Mooner's room first. If he wasn't a stoner, I would be all over him. He's six feet, three inches tall. Two hundred and fifteen pounds. Toned. Which is beyond me. I've seen him eat. Where in the hell does it all go? I've never seen him work out, but he had an eight pack. That mixed with the lazy blue eyes and blonde disheveled hair and you have one hell of a yummy man.

I walked over to the head of his bed and looked down at him. He looked so innocent. His full cheeks, wide jaw line, and thick eye lashes gave him a 'boy next door' look. His sharp eye brows and lean, muscular body contradicted that. I let my eyes take a leisurely stole down his body. I smiled when I got to his boxers. Scooby Doo. I looked back up at his face. There was a little smile playing at the corners on his full lips. Now I felt bad. He was having a good dream. I'd feel really bad if I interrupted that.

I quietly walked out of his room and peeked into Dougie's room. He was out like a light as well. I headed back down stairs and went into the living room. I flipped on the TV and settled in with my breakfast. I channel surfed until I found Scooby Doo. I smiled at the TV and dug in.

Dougie made his way down the stairs about an hour later. He looked over at me and gave a small wave before he headed into the kitchen. About a minute later I could smell his wake up bowl. He stumbled out of the kitchen a few minutes later with a sparkling grin in place. He walked over and sat next to me on the couch. I handed him a bag of food and went back to watching TV without a word.

Dougie is built just like Mooner. Same height, same weight, and same delicious eight pack. I would guess that it would make it rather convenient. They could share clothes. That's where the similarities end. Dougie has a thin face. Thin long nose, high narrow cheek bones, long pointy jaw. Thin lips that are quick to give a 'Joker'-like smile. He does do a really good impression of Jack Nicholson. I'll give him that much. He has amber eyes and he is currently sporting a neon green Mohawk. I let my eyes walk their way up Dougie's body all the way up to his face.

"See something that you like?" Dougie asked with a wolfish grin.

"I was going to ask where you got your cute boxers. I like the little hearts," I said with a big grin.

Dougie looked confused and then looked down at himself. I saw his cheeks turn bright red right before he jumped off the couch and ran upstairs. Evidentially, Dougie forgot that he was only in boxers. He returned a few minutes later with a pair of jeans on and mumbled an apology.

Mooner stumbled down the stairs a half an hour later and went straight to the kitchen. Dougie got up and followed him in. They both reappeared a few minutes later. Both grinning. They sat down on the couch with me in the middle. I handed Mooner his bag of food and returned my attention to the TV.

"Steph?" Mooner said after a half an hour of silence.

"Huh?" I said as I looked over at Mooner.

"What are you doing here?"

"You're FTA, my friend," I said with a huge smile. "I need to get you rebonded whenever you're ready."

"Not again," Mooner said as he hit himself in the head.

"I'll get you through it. Again. This time, I'll make a note of your court date on my calendar and at the office. Connie and I won't let it happen again."

"You're the best Steph," Mooner said as he threw his arms around me and gave me a bear hug.

"Where's my love?" Dougie asked after Mooner released me.

I turned to give Dougie a hug and soon found myself in his lap. I laughed and kissed Dougie on the cheek as I gave him a hug. I love my little stoners.

I had called Connie and arranged to meet her at the station to get Mooner rebounded. I then met up with Joe and had lunch with him. During lunch, Lula called to let me know that she was back at the office. I had told her that I only had one more FTA and I felt comfortable doing it on my own.

That's when everything started going down hill.

Please review. I'm not sure where to take this to. I may have to take more time with this story, then I did with my last one. - Kate