After a restless night's sleep, Remus opened his eyes, yawning. The first thing he realised was that he was lying on the floor. The second was that he was not in the dormitory. He stood up quickly, and looked around. Sirius was lying on the scratched wooden floorboards a few feet away. They were, he now realised, in the Shrieking Shack.

"Sirius… Sirius!" he said, shaking his friend vigorously. Sirius blinked sleepily.

"What's going on?" he asked, sitting up.

"I don't know!"

"Must be James' last task…" Sirius said slowly, staring around. "What are we supposed to do?"

Remus spotted a note wedged in the frame of a broken mirror hanging on the wall. He tugged it out and read it aloud.

Hey Guys!

Welcome to the Love Shack of Hogsmeade. Hope you enjoy your stay… leaving may prove a little tricky however. Still, you have plenty of time. Sit back, relax. Listen to your heart. Go with your instinct. Hope you enjoy our hospitality.

Prongs

Ps. you may be in here for a while. I'm not going to let you out, just so you know. Hasta la Vista!

"So… the task is to escape…?" Sirius said slowly. Remus shrugged, avoiding Sirius' eye.

"Yeah, guess so."

They walked out of the room they were in, and into the dark hallway. Somebody probably James, had chalked arrows down the walls. The door to the room containing the entrance to the tunnel back to Hogwarts was ajar. Remus pushed it open and gasped. The messy little room with its stained wallpaper and broken furniture was bathed in an ethereal amethyst glow. The passageway was sealed off with a glowing purple barrier. Sirius ran at it, attempting to break though, but fell onto his back. He shook his head, dazedly.

"You okay?" Remus asked, pulling Sirius up. Sirius studied Remus' face. Had he forgotten about last night? Had last night actually happened? Maybe Remus was trying to forget about it, but was completely disgusted? At least he hadn't punched him. Sirius still couldn't believe he had actually done it. It was like he had no control; he did not mean to do it. He was glad he had done, obviously. But had it ruined his relationship with Remus?

Remus walked towards the barrier.

"Reducto!"

Nothing happened. He waved his wand frantically, muttering all the incantations he could think of.

"Okay, we need to think about this logically." he said, putting his wand down on a table that had huge gouge marks in the surface. Sirius slouched against the peeling wallpaper.

"Uh…Remus?"

"… So I think… yeah?"

"Do you remember… what happened last night?"

Remus swallowed.

"Yeah."

"Remus, I'm sorry. It was all a huge mistake. I should never have done it; I took advantage of you, I mean, I wasn't thinking, it wasn't…"

Remus looked down at the grimy floor.

"So… you're sorry it happened?"

"Uh…"

Sirius scratched his head. No, he wasn't sorry that it happened.

"Well, it should never have happened…" he said.

"Okay."

"So you aren't mad?"

"Nope."

Sirius relaxed.

"Good."

Remus smiled, but inside, he was screaming. He had been sure that Sirius never meant it to happen, that it was all a mistake. But he had still hoped deep down, that there had been a deeper meaning. Clearly not.

"Sit back, relax?" he read off James' note. "I think that he means that we don't have to think hard about what we need to do to escape. Listen to your heart… follow your instincts…"

"That might mean that we already know what we need to do, we just need to… you know… look inside ourselves."

"Yeah, so it must be something quite obvious."

Remus sat cross legged, drawing diagrams with his finger in the dust. Sirius paced up and down.

"Try turning into Padfoot." Remus suggested. Sirius shook his head.

"I'm not leaving you if it is that, anyway."

"Well, maybe if you try it, the barrier will go down and we can both go through."

Sirius nodded, and the big black dog ran at the purple door. He bounced off and sprawled on the floor, paws akimbo.

"No… I don't think it's that…" he said, human again, wincing as he felt his sore shoulder. Remus frowned.

"Well, it could be a password." he said slowly, staring at the tunnel entrance. "Uh… Remus. Sirius. Marauders. Moony. Padfoot… oh wait, I said that before, it can't be that… uh… Prongs. James."

"Lily." Sirius suggested. Still nothing happened.

"James and Lily?" Remus asked.

"Snape is a loser."

"Quidditch."

"Snitch."

"Gryffindor."

About half an hour later, they had both tried nearly every word and phrase they could think of.

"Spider monkey." Sirius yawned, leaning on Remus.

"Discombobulating."

"Plastic grass."

"Fizzing Whizzbee."

"Butterbeer."

"Rune Dictionary."

"Oh come on Remus, James wouldn't have a book as the password."

"True."

Sirius sighed.

"Well, what can it be? Maybe it isn't a password."

Remus got his wand out and starting trying random spells.

"Maybe it's something to do with the Shack itself?" Sirius suggested.

"Well, we can't wait till full moon." Remus said with a grin.

"Hey, maybe we should shriek? It is the Shrieking Shack after all."

Sirius threw his head back and let out a piercing shriek. Remus winced, clutching his ears. Sirius peered at the purple barrier.

"Nope, still in one piece."

"Wish I could say the same for my eardrums." Remus moaned. "Ever thought of getting a job as a banshee?"

"I'm too beautiful for that kind of work."

Remus gave Sirius a small shove, smiling.

"Poser." he teased. Sirius laughed, flicking a tendril of hair out of his eyes.

"But not as beautiful as you, Remus." he said mischievously.

"You're making me blush!" Remus said with a smile.

"Good." Sirius said. Remus stared at him, and then got up.

"What are you doing?" Sirius called after him.

"Checking if there is any other way out!" Remus shouted back. He came back a few minutes later, shaking his head ruefully.

"Same glowy light on all the exits. We might as well concentrate on this one… not a good idea to go haring around Hogsmeade dressed like this."

He gestured at his vest and boxers. Sirius nodded his agreement, and patted the floor next to him.

"Come sit down. I need your brains to get us out of here, thank you very much."

Remus sat down beside him.

"Thanks," he yawned "But I think we're screwed. I can't think of anything."

Sirius threw his hands in the air.

"If Remus can't think of anything, then we're doomed."

"We are." Remus agreed. "So very doomed."

"Doomed to stay here for eternity, until we die, alone and unloved…"

"Stop being a drama queen. James will let us out eventually."

"No he won't!" Sirius said theatrically. He stabbed a finger at the post script on James' note. Remus rolled his eyes.

"Siri, James won't leave us here to starve. If we don't work out how to escape, he'll come get us."

"He won't! We'll die here…" Sirius wailed. He pretended to sob loudly into his hands.

"Doubt it. We may fail the task, though."

Sirius looked up.

"Well that's even worse than death!" he said. Remus laughed, squeezing his shoulder.

"Okay, help me figure it out then!"

They both looked at the note for the hundredth time. Remus stared at it so hard his eyes watered, searching for some hidden meaning. He rearranged the words, trying to make sense of James' cryptic message.

"Listen to your heart…" he muttered.

"A heart goes like this…" Sirius said helpfully, tapping out a rhythm on the floor.

"I don't think he means it quite so literally."

"Sit back, relax…" Sirius read "Maybe we are meant to go to sleep."

Remus sniggered.

"Yeah, you wish. Come on lazy bones, I need all the help I can get."

Sirius sighed, squinting at the parchment. Remus looked at the ceiling. Listen to his heart… that must mean he had to do something that he wanted to do deep down, but wasn't consciously aware of. So to find it, he would have to go into subconscious thought. Which were… dreams? Well, daydreams at any rate.

"Don't talk to me for a minute. I'm thinking." he said. Sirius nodded. Remus lay back, and tried to let himself drift. He closed his eyes, and tried to clear his mind. Sirius looked down at Remus.

"You aren't going to sleep are you?" he asked.

"Dammit Sirius! I was trying to have an epiphany!"

"Oh… sorry. Good luck with that."

Remus sighed, and shook his head. Then suddenly, he knew. He leaned forwards, and kissed Sirius. Sirius' eyes widened, but before he could respond, Remus pulled away, and turned towards the tunnel entrance. The purple light was fading, and Remus got to his feet, stooping so as to not bang his head. Sirius followed, utterly bewildered. He had no idea how Remus had known what to do, nor why James had assigned that action to release them from the shack. They emerged from the roots of the Whomping

Willow to see James lolling on the ground in the sun.

"Ah!" he beamed "Here you are! That was quicker than I expected, well done. And now, we can go to tell everybody the truth about the past week. Come."

They followed him. Sirius felt quite annoyed that the week was over, come to think of it. He looked at Remus, and knew what he had to do. He had to make sure.

"Uh Remes? Can I talk to you for a sec, first?"

They had just entered the main school. They were attracted a few strange looks since they were in their underwear, but luckily there were no teachers or Slytherins about. Remus nodded.

"Meet you in the common room." Sirius said to James. He winked, and Sirius got the strangest feeling that James knew exactly what was going on. Remus followed Sirius up a flight of stairs and down a deserted corridor. Sirius pulled back a tapestry, behind which was a door. He opened it, and they both went inside the secret passage concealed behind it. Remus pulled the tapestry back over the doorway, and closed the door behind them. Then he gave Sirius a quizzical look. Sirius cleared his throat, which felt suddenly like sandpaper.

"Uh, Remus? Um… why exactly… how did you know what to do, to get us out of the Shack?"

Remus swallowed.

"I just thought, you know, what kind of thing would James have us do to get out of there?"

Sirius smiled.

"You know Remus, your left eyes does the cutest little twitch thing when you're lying."

Remus sighed.

"All right then. Promise you won't hate me."

"Okay."

"Well… I listened to my heart. Happy?"

Sirius looked confused.

"When you say that, what do you mean?"

Remus looked exasperated.

"Oh for Merlin's sake… I'm in love with you, you stupid bastard!" he snapped. Sirius' look of confusion turned suddenly to delight.

"Well, seeing as we're doing the confession thing, I have one as well. About last night… I lied. That kiss did mean something. Because… well… I love you too."

Remus raised his eyebrow.

"You do?"

"I do."

"Prove it."

Sirius sighed, smiling. He grabbed the front of Remus' vest and kissed him fervently. Remus kissed him back just as hard, pressing himself against Sirius and running his fingers through the long black hair. Sirius smiled as he plunged his tongue into Remus' mouth. Their tongues danced a wild tango as Sirius closed his eyes, pushing Remus against the wall and stroking his neck as they kissed hungrily. Remus pulled away and looked into Sirius' steely grey eyes.

"Wow." He breathed, fanning his face with one hand. "Okay, I believe you."

"Thought you might." Sirius breathed into Remus' lips.

"Poor James, his plan failed…" Remus whispered back. "His "test of character" tasks, designed to humiliate us and force us into giving up, therefore ending up hideously deformed, backfired and made us realise our true feelings."

"True." Sirius said "So… you want to just not tell anybody it was a prank? Carry on the charade as it were?"

"Seems a good idea." Remus smiled. "You can tell James."

"I will do if you kiss me again…"

"Sounds fair." Remus grinned, and kissed Sirius again. Sirius punched the air above his head, jumping up and down. Remus laughed.

"Idiot." he said. Sirius swept Remus up in his arms, planting butterfly kisses up his neck. Remus moaned, wriggling. He wrapped his arms around Sirius, and then his legs, kissing Sirius, losing himself in Sirius. Sirius pushed Remus down onto the floor, not breaking the kiss. Remus let out a small moan as they hit the floor.

And a few feet away, concealed under the Invisibility Cloak, James Potter watched them in interest.

Silly puppies he thought fondly my plan worked perfectly.

Then, as Sirius ground himself against Remus, kissing every inch of bare skin in reach, James decided it might be time to leave. He slipped out of the passage, closing the door quietly behind him. But Sirius and Remus were too wrapped up in each other to notice.

"Is this really happening?" Remus gasped, his brown hair fanning out around his head as Sirius bit down on his shoulder.

"I hope so." Sirius growled "My fantasies aren't usually this intense."

He sat upright, looking down at Remus like he was a huge chocolate cake that he just wanted to devour. Remus tried to sit up, but Sirius pushed him back down.

"Down boy." he ordered, grinning. Remus strained against Sirius' arm, and eventually got free. He rolled over so that he was on top and Sirius was underneath.

"Not so tough now, are you?" he sneered. Sirius retaliated by licking his lips and giving a roguish wink that Remus just couldn't resist. The brunette leaned forwards and kissed Sirius roughly, biting his lips and running his tongue along his teeth. Sirius groaned, feeling heat explode inside him. Remus pulled away, leaving Sirius lying angrily on the floor, glaring up at him.

"You stopped." he said accusingly.

"So sorry." Remus drawled.

"Don't stop." Sirius moaned, squirming underneath Remus.

"James will be wondering where we went." Remus reminded him.

"I hate you." Sirius scowled. Remus smirked.

"Don't worry Sirius. There will be plenty of time for that later." Remus said. "And more, much more."

"I like the sound of that." Sirius purred. "James was right. This was the mother of all pranks."