She was small and walking swiftly across the Entrance Hall, wanting to be outside as quickly as possible because she wasn't mean to shout indoors. James jogged next to her, laughing and saying things. They were nice things but they made her angry. Angry because he was probably lying -- James Potter never told the truth.

Her skirt was flying around her knees, too long and definitely too big. Her tie flapped against her stomach, and her shoes slapped the stone flagged floor with a violence that she couldn't control. Her head was furious and full, screaming go, go, go! Just so she could be outside.

But when she reached the giant, open doors, and crossed the threshold into the wide air and grassy hills that rolled to the lake, all of the angry disappeared. All at once, she felt overwhelmed, she was taller and it was pouring down with rain, her hair was longer and tied up, instead of the silly bob cut she had in first year.

But the words that echoed from James' mouth were still the same. Just softer and more caring. Not childish and laughing.

"We're going to be married one day."

Lily woke up with a shudder in her heart. Not from cold, or heat, or sickness. It was too full of love and hope that it tried to create an extra beat between the regular ones. She had an instinct to laugh aloud, or cry. Hysteria branded her thoughts and she was wondering what their wedding would look like. She hoped it would be small, parents, close friends, siblings. A simple dress, and pretty, laced veil.

Her heart was in her throat and she couldn't figure out whether she should be excited or nervous about running into James today. But under no circumstances was she to run away, or purposely avoid him. At all. He was there, he wasn't anything, but he was there. And he wasn't going anywhere -- of that she was sure.

Dressing with certain care, Lily felt suddenly ridiculous. The boy was already in love with her, it didn't make any difference what she wore. He had seen her at her worst, and he still couldn't stop caring. Why was she putting so much effort in?

That reasonable little voice at the back of her head said that she wanted to look pretty for him. She wanted him to say "You look beautiful today" instead of just smiling at her. She wanted him to notice everything, she wanted him to know everything. Even the fact that she had put extra thought into the lip balm she chose that morning.

Seconds before she left the protection of her dormitory, she took one cleansing breath. It filled her lungs to the brim and cleared her head of any stray, silly thoughts of things like weddings and kisses.

- X -

He was waiting in the common room for her. He had been waiting there for an hour, just in case she had decided to go back on her word and start avoiding him by going to breakfast early. In a brief moment of sanity James had thought of letting her come to him, but he knew that she wouldn't ever make the first move. He would have to keep slowly nudging and nudging her until she stopped the ridiculous business of them not being together.

Everyone could see that they were made for each other.

And when Lily came trudging down the stairs, James had never been more glad to ignore the sane part of his brain. She was there, she was amazing, she was real. He watched as her eyes scoured the empty room before settling them on him. She blushed, he was well hidden, if she hadn't been looking hard, she wouldn't have spotted him. He was sitting on one of the big couches, but kneeling on it so he looked over the back, he had even crouched down so only his eyes and up were exposed next to his fingers clutching the cushioned fabric.

Pretending that she had never seem him, Lily started walking towards the portrait hole. Not ignoring, or avoiding, just knowing that she wasn't meant to be seeing him.

When she was outside, she breathed in again, not knowing that she had been holding her breath since she had seen his face. She almost screamed when a hand touched her shoulder and James' voice smothered the sweet silence that she had been relishing in. The feelings that she emitted when he was around seemed to ring like a bell. Audible only to her own ears.

"Good morning sunshine," James whispered in her ear, closer than she had expected.

Lily wanted to get her intentions out in the open straight away, there would be no secrets, there would be no lies. And at that moment, there was no them. Whatever had happened the night before was a one off thing for now. Just a little reminder that avoiding him was a stupid game and doesn't work, because he has his ways. Those ways over power her silly thoughts any day, but only when she was being an idiot.

"Just so you know, we are not a we. Okay? What happened last night wasn't us getting together. It doesn't feel right. We both know that it'll happen eventually, and I'm sorry that you're waiting even longer but I'm just not quite ready. Yet."

James seemed a little taken back, but wasn't disheartened. She would be his, in time. She already was his. Just not in the literal sense of the word -- mostly because no one knew. But they would. They'd know when he knew.

"Fine..." he sighed, glanced around and then pulled her into a spot where a suit of armor used to stand. "But that won't be until after NEWTs, and I know that you won't be around much because you like to study and you don't want people getting ideas in there heads."

Pressing her against the wall gently, just so she couldn't escape him, James kissed her softly. Lily tried not to move, she was stuck between wanting to just be with him and her instincts telling her it was a bad idea at the moment. He tasted like mint and smelled like soap, it would be impossible not to have this while she made up her mind about him. But she would live.

When he pulled away, he looked her in the eye. "I know I shouldn't say this right now, but I have to get it out there. Just in case it takes a while for you to decided when the time is right."

Lily was frightened, not for her life, but for her emotions. She didn't want to screw them up. Or the possibility of them. He was too important.

James held onto her face, cradling her cheeks in warm palms, he was afraid they were sweating.

"I just want you to know that I love you. I love you more than you could possibly imagine."

Her heart raced, her breath caught in her throat. She was sure she'd heard him say it before to her, but never so intimately. "I know," she said weakly. "Lets get to breakfast, I'm hungry."

Lily pulled away from his grip, feeling as if she was shaking and smiling and about to cry. James caught up to her in seconds, wrapped a friendly arm around her and said "For the love of Merlin, I'm so hungry I could eat a horse!"

The tension drifted away, and friendship settled in. Lily could finally breathe.

A/N: Another post after a long absence. Sorry. Mostly I'm too lazy to write, mostly I have no time. I'm hoping to start something new soon. I've had all these ideas buzzing around my head for so long -- I just never get the privacy I need to write. My parents are always hanging around. I'm getting my own computer at the end of the year, so maybe then I'll start posting more stuff for you guys.

Every time I write I think of you guys, the readers, and all the support you've given me. Thanks heaps. I'll try and update sooner than I have been. Try being the key word there.