Disclaimer: Call the dogs off, I claim ownership to nothing but the confusing 'plot' and ridiculous writing style.

Dedication: For the dear animeluvr999, for being awesome. This is a thanks for the fics, the talks and the fun. Teasing or no, it did always entertain me. Happy belated, ridiculously so, Birthday...?

Use me, I'm beautiful
Take me, I'm yours

You look so angry.

Pulling out another white feather from your remarkable and brilliant white wings, you only offer me a malicious smirk.

No one could ever understand the pain that gripped me for a mere second at that sight. Would never understand, had they even been here to feel it for themselves. It's painful, and I fear it, almost more than I fear you leaving me again.

You are too cruel.

What did I ever do to deserve this?

I frantically look for a clean escape from your obviously charging attack. The walls surrounding us are viciously white, just like your beautiful wings. There is nothing – with the exception of a small, old cot… this room is a death trap when you occupy it.

I see the blinding light that you release from your hands and I jump to the side, barely escaping its wrath. Landing on my feet with a cat-like grace, I run towards your susceptible form, still recovering from the spell you unleashed.

On a wild ride to oblivion
I lost my mind

Throwing myself at you in a running tackle, I quickly overtake you and we tumble to the painfully clean and shining white floor. You grunt at the impact and I duck my head into your chest to lessen my own impact.

I hear the steel cross clatter against the linoleum as it too follows us to the ground. I have no time to ponder on the reason behind that metaphorical theme you seem to insist upon, because I feel you begin to struggle to sit up.

Straddling you, I stare deeply into your golden eyes. Trying to guard my emotions, it seems I fail, because you grimace as you look back. I tighten my grip and try to summon magic of my own, but I find myself too weak. Is this because my tamer is gone?

What have you done to me?

You let out a feral growl, teeth bared in obvious annoyance at the situation. I place all my weight on your abdomen in a futile attempt to keep you down.

Your arms look so powerful
When they hold me down

It doesn't take you long at all to reverse the situation at all, and I feel the tell-tale pain of my skull hitting the floor.

Dizzy from the impact, I try to regain my focus, only to notice your deceptively delicate visage inches from mine.

Your burly arms grab my wrists and hold them down over my head. I don't even bother with an attempt to escape; my frail form remains stiff under yours.

That smug, spiteful smirk returns to your features and I'm forced to look away. I turn my head to the side and stare at the glaringly white wall.

You seem displeased that my attention isn't focused entirely on your being. Painfully grabbing my chin, you force me to face you. Wincing, I comply without resistance, realizing how moronic resisting you would be.

I vaguely feel a sticky, damp substance at the back of my head and I wonder if I'm bleeding. My thoughts are swiftly interrupted by the presence of something on my mouth.

I gasp, and that presence is quickly inside of my mouth. Instinctively, I begin to thrash my body, but that only proves how I pale in strength compared to a divine being like you.

Squeezing my eyes closed together painfully, I can't help but moan into your mouth as your tongue slowly caresses mine enticingly. On impulse, I begin to kiss you back. I bring my arms up; oblivious to the fact you had released them minutes before, and place them around your neck, pulling your body closer to mine.

Grinding your hips onto mine I gasp, breaking off our kiss.

Eyes still closed, I begin to feel dizzy, but I can distinctly feel you lifting yourself off of me. When your weight is completely gone, I open my eyes to fnd you, but can't.

You've left me again.

Wincing, I bring myself to my elbows, bringing a hand to the back of my head. Sure enough, when I pull it back, all I see is blood. Red…

Red…

Red…

I fall back down and my vision fades. Soon, all I can see is your malevolent smile and eyes glaring into mine

"Good night…"

Everyone looks dangerous
and no one keeps their promises
and I am always running
and you have your dark places
Regretting
Feeling
Remembering
Something

Blinking away the invading light, I sit up, bringing my hand up to clutch my throbbing head. I feel a foreign substance that I assume must be bandages. I groan and swing my legs over the edge of the cot.

"Mr. Mousy! Please, lay back down! You are in no condition to be moving!"

I feel hands pushing me back down, a woman in white standing over me. She's pretty, but her high pitched voice annoys more than I can ever describe, and it doesn't help the dull ache in my cranium at all. She's holding a clipboard and I manage to get a glimpse of the writing.

Dark Mousy

Age: Unknown

Suffers from vivid hallucinations and delusions, sometimes resulting in self – inflicted harm. Claims to see a divine white angel spirit. Suffering from amnesia and short-term memory loss since found. Sedation recommended in severe fits.

Possibly a result from a traumatizing experience in the past or childhood. Found unconscious in an alley. No family known. No claims to a…

I stopped reading and stared in shock. Hallucinations? Self-Harming? No longer resisting the young woman, I lay back against the pillow, silently contemplating the information.

The woman had called me Mr. Mousy… so that's me?

"Where… am I…?"

The nurse stood back, giving a sympathetic look to the patient.

"Mr. Dark, you are in a hospital. You are very sick, and have been for a very long time. But no worries, I have faith in you and your ability to get better!"

I winced at the screechy tones. Why does this seem so familiar? Is this Déjà vu? Has this all happened before?

"Hiwa…tari?" The nurse smiled.

"That's right! Mr. Hiwatari is your doctor. He will want to talk to you later this afternoon after that…" she pauses for only a moment "…episode. You really hurt yourself today…" She trailed off as she saw the patient wasn't listening, only staring at the wall beside him.

He seemed so real…

I wanted for him to be real.

I smiled to myself. Of course he's real. He wouldn't lie to me. He's cruel, but I trust him. The people here have no idea what they're talking about.

I could be happy
with someone to trust
someone to love

Use me, I'm beautiful
Take me, I'm yours

I have been arguing with myself for days now, on what to write for you (animeluvr999), and I eventually acctually gave up (sweatdrops) ... but when I finished all the other stuff, this came at me from nowhere approximately, two hours ago. lol. I hope you enjoyed it!

Song is Use Me by Garbage. Really good music. yay!

Oh... and sorry if I offend any one... at all...

Read and review please!

-Broken Vows