Disclaimer: I don't own anything associating with Inuyasha, sadly.

Summary: Grief imprisoned her as the sky imprisons the moon. But like the ripples of a pond, love can reach to the outermost parts of souls, lighting places where only darkness had been known. SessKag, one-shot!

A/N: Warning: this is a very long one-shot. And also very sad. Don't read if you don't like reading about grief!

This is my first one-shot, and I'd really appreciate if I got some feedback. Was it good? Is there room for improvement? No flamers please, but constructive criticism is welcome.

And to let you know ahead of time in case you get confused, Sesshomaru does develop feelings for Kagome, I just don't explain it from his point of view, or explain his transition that much in depth. I will mention it a little bit, and his actions will speak louder than any words, but you will see…if you read it :)

Anyways, I spent a TON of time on this, so PLEASE PLEASE review, and enjoy!

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Bleeding Moon
By Imperfectly-Yours

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Nothing remained in the bitter darkness of the land.

Nothing but the mangled bodies of many demons that littered the blood-soaked field. Nothing but dark sky that loomed above the horizon as a black impenetrable wall. Nothing but the relentless wind, as cold and unforgiving as the chilling breath of winter.

Nothing but death.

But there was life, a single life that clung desperately to the world it lived in, a life that clawed its way through mud and blood and remnants of the night rain. A life belonging to a young girl, named Kagome, who had never been a part of such death in all her life.

The smell that accumulated around her was putrid and rancid, and was that of the now dead and decomposing demons. Their spilled scarlet blood and entrails seeped into the mud that she dragged her body through. A sharp pain still throbbed terribly in her side, and she was sure her stomach was mangled and horribly disfigured, but it only showed a deep and crimson wound that still bled profusely. But the throb was constant, and she was as used to it as she was to the beating of her struggling heart.

Kagome cursed bitterly under her breath. She could still remember the fortnight clearly. She and Inuyasha had gone for a walk. He claimed he had something important to tell her, but never had the chance, for as soon as the moon was hidden behind a dark veil of clouds, they were ambushed. Ambushed! By the servants of Naraku who were after the almost completed Shikon Jewel that hung around her neck. But the battle's events remained foggy and unclear. She just remembered feeling a terrible, horrible pain, a pain like nothing she had ever felt, and then nothing else as she fell forever through an empty space of darkness.

Kagome was unsure of why she had survived. Maybe it was luck. Maybe it was her powers that had kept her from the grasp of death. Was it her curse? Or was it her fate? She did not know yet, and could only continue to push herself onwards through the bloody field.

She had little strength left in her frail body, which was covered by wounds and gashes and cuts from the battle of the previous night. Still, poison seeped through her veins, and she was often paralyzed. But she would not give up. Not when Inuyasha lay somewhere in this sea of demons they had managed to slay. Not when he could still be alive, and waiting for her. Not when she could save him from a fate she herself could succumb to.

Kagome, now on her hands and knees, stumbled upon something sharp and gleaming. She picked it up in her hands. She recognized it instantly, its light frame balanced in her muddy palms. It was the Tetsusaiga, the sword Inuyasha wielded!

He had to be nearby. Looking up, she only saw a headless centipede demon before her. But she looked beyond, and saw something white and shimmering like stained silk.

That's when she saw him suddenly, only a couple yards away. She began to dig deep inside her, finding a hidden strength she didn't know she had. She continued to pull herself through the rotten soil of the earth, not caring for anything else in the world, ignoring her injuries, ignoring her pain, and only the thought of his warm touch on her skin ran through her mind.

Moving closer to him, she saw his eyes open, and saw that he was facing towards her. For the first time since she had awoken earlier that morning, she felt a hope, a glistening and fragile hope form inside her, a hope that he was still alive, and all was not lost.

She moved quicker now, her mind only focusing on reaching him. Soon she was only a yard away. Then a few feet. And then, though she couldn't believe she had mustered enough strength to come to this moment, she could see his features clearly. Kagome winced at that instant, realizing his wounds were much greater than her own.

With a final drag of her numb body she pulled herself forward so that she was close to him. Using her last fragment of broken energy, she pushed herself up, sitting on her bruised knees.

"Inu…" She began, but stopped suddenly as she gazed into his eyes that did not look up to her, but remained motionless and fixed on the horizon.

She forgot how to breathe. She was frozen, rooted to the spot on which she sat, her hands shaking violently.

"Inu…yasha?" She called to him quietly.

The only reply she received was the soft calling of the wind, which tugged at his silver hair and scattered dried leaves, the small, crumpled hands of lost life, around them.

She looked down at his face, caked with dry mud and much blood. His fire rat robe was torn in too many places to count, and the deep wounds he carried still glistened faintly. With a shaky arm, she reached for his hand and held it in her own. It was freezing cold. She gasped and released it, letting it fall into a shimmering pool of blood, the ripples splattering her legs with small droplets of ruby.

"No." Kagome said softly. She denied it. She denied what was the inevitable truth. She denied the shadows that laced his body, the shadows of a death.

"No!" She repeated, her voice rising as she began to shake his shoulders softly, tears spilling over the brims of her eyes.

"INUYASHA! PLEASE, WAKE UP!" Kagome felt her world topple over its thin axis and crush her, leaving her out of breath and dazed, her surroundings stretched and disproportioned and blurry from the tears that covered her eyes before dripping down the ridges of her face to below.

She began to shake his shoulders violently, hoping to awake him of his slumber.

"YOU CANNOT LEAVE ME HERE! YOU CANNOT LEAVE ME TO WALK THIS WORLD ALONE!" She yelled loudly as she took his hands from his shoulders and turned his face towards hers. His face was relaxed in a peaceful expression, and his features were as perfect and beautiful as she had always remembered them.

Their eyes met but his irises carried no signs of life and only black hands of death reached out to her being.

Her eyes glistened with fresh tears, and a deep, ragged sob began to shake her body, and erupted from her mouth.

"Oh god." She whispered, and she put her face in her dirty hands and began to sob, her body shaking as she cried loudly into her palms, her moans and whimpers barely muffled, her deep inhales and exhales almost choked as she continued to cry, a million pains escaping through her body, a million emotions flooding her inside, threatening to drown her.

Kagome lifted his body to her chest and cradled it in her arms, rocking to and fro. The only movement of his body was his head that lolled limply back and forth, his eyes still blank and unmoving. Tears fell continuously down her face, leaving tiny pathways on her skin where only dirt had piled up.

She looked up to dappled sky, holding his cold body close to hers, knowing for the first time a terrible truth: he was dead, he was gone, and he was never coming back.

She could not hold in her emotions any longer. Wrapping her arms around his neck, she laid him down on to the ground gently, and buried her face into his cold, lifeless chest. She let out a long, raspy, wavering wail, and began to weep, but did not stop for what seemed to be many hours.

She stopped only when she could no longer force tears from her eyes or force a single whisper of noise from her mouth. She only felt empty, terribly empty, like a great void had collapsed inside her, swallowing everything and leaving her with an aching like something was gone and could never be replaced. She stared awkwardly at her hands which rested on her lap. It felt like her soul was hovering in the air above her body, no longer trapped within its walls, and watched her carefully. She felt like the color had been drained from her eyes. She felt like only thing that remained of her was the thin layer of skin that covered her fragile, empty body.

Kagome looked up at the forest beyond in little interest. A pinprick of sunlight hovered between the boughs of a tall tree. She decided it must have been the dawning of a new day.

But to her, time seem shattered, its remnants falling endlessly around her in a rain of bits of broken glass that reflected the memories Kagome did not bother to save.

Suddenly, a dark figure appeared on the hill before her. Its hair cascaded down its back in small streams and glowed like the silver face of the moon. It appeared to be wrapped in a kimono of white linen that billowed out behind it in a small breeze. The aura around it was also silver and glowed with a sort of radiance that made her feel like she was looking at something heavenly, something that didn't belong on the filthy ground of the earth. And yet, this fallen star watched her. But something about it made Kagome feel safe, for it felt like it had reached out to her, and held her frantic heart between its warm palms.

So, with a final exasperated breath, Kagome collapsed into Inuyasha's chest once more, knowing she was in the presence of an angel that had come to rescue her.

---

He had stumbled upon her, or rather, she had stumbled upon him.

He would have overlooked her, her small body almost hidden amongst the vast sea of disfigured bodies of demons; her scent didn't even reach his nose under the putrid odor of the slain beasts.

He planned to just pass by. The scene before him was not pleasant to the eye, and the smells were almost too much for his sensitive nose.

So, he turned away. Halfway through his step the wind caught on his white garments and lifted a scent to his nose. He stopped, his eyes widening. The scent was a bitter one that gave an impression of smoke and fire, and burned his nose. It was unmistakable and could not be confused with any others. It was the scent of his half-brother, Inuyasha.

He turned around, knowing then that the field below was not just a battle of little consequence. It was that that involved Inuyasha, and possibly his death. Though he still remained indifferent to the fact his brother might be dead, he could not help but notice a figure below that stared right at him, a figure he could sense an emptiness inside so great and vast he could almost see right through the body. It was as if it had no soul.

Suddenly, the figure collapsed, falling into something red, whether it was blood or not he could not tell. And at that moment, he saw the dim shimmering of ebony tresses where its head lay. Barricading all other he scents, he discovered it was not only a girl, but Inuyasha's wench…Kagome…

But even so, her life remained! And if it was a life so determined to survive that it had clung to the living world, even when so much death around it tried to pull it down with them to the blackest depths, then, he decided, it was a life worth saving.

And so, here he was, watching the girl Kagome lay still and silent on the shadowed ground of the forest. Sometimes she would shudder and shiver as if covered with a blanket of frost. Other times she would writhe and wriggle about as if trying to escape a terrible nightmare, her face twisted and contorted in pain.

But mostly she was peaceful, her face relaxed and her expression loose. Sometimes she would lie so still that he believed her dead, her only movement the stirring of her dark hair that lifted in the breeze. But she had not shown any sign of waking for many hours. And yet, all the while, Sesshomaru watched her as if captivated with fascination, watched her from the shade of the forest shrubbery, his sun-kissed eyes the only thing flashing from within the shadows.

Suddenly, he saw her body shift on the bedding of wild grass, her hands reaching up to rub her eyes open. It looked as though she had just woken from a peaceful nap, yet as soon as she moved her arms up, she jerked them back violently, a soft whimper of pain passing through her lips.

Her eyes blinked many times, but she did not glance to where he had been sitting. He decided it was no longer worth it for him to be hiding, for he already felt like a spy.

He stepped out of the dim shade, the mid-afternoon light spilling across his figure. Kagome sensed his presence and immediately turned to him, her eyes widening and mouth hung agape when she laid eyes on his face.

"Inu…Sesshomaru?" She gasped, but then corrected herself, her brightened face falling when she realized it was their striking resemblance that had made her confused.

He did not respond, instead laying a long finger on the bark of a tree and then pressing his back against it.

"What are you doing here? And why am I here?" She questioned, her expression puzzled, her eyes drowsy from the awakening from her slumber.

"I passed by the battle field earlier, and was able to catch your scent before leaving. I knew you were still alive, so I decided to move you, giving you a greater chance to survive." He said curtly, his eyes remaining on a large pine tree which she had been resting beneath.

"Why are you still here, then?" She questioned, and for a moment Sesshomaru froze, not sure of how to explain that he had been watching her of his own free will.

"What good would it be if I just left you here to be picked on by wild animals? Or harassed by the elements?" He retorted quickly, and she bit her lip, obviously feeling a bit stupid not to realize that.

"What have I done that has caused you to go through much trouble to move me?" She asked, her tired face sinking even lower as she spoke.

"I guess I felt I owed you a little hospitality for your rather rash, but sometimes brave, behavior. Whenever there was a quarrel between my brother and I, you always seemed to stupidly get in the way, trying to stop us. Because of it, you have allowed me to escape my brother's immaturity many a time, and saved me of much agitation."

Kagome nodded, assuming that what he was saying hid a compliment in it somewhere.

A silence soon enveloped between them. The storm clouds were beginning to shift, allowing a brilliant light to flood the woodland area. But only the wind's whispers could be heard, its soft voice weaving through the trees.

It was at this time, Kagome felt a small pulse inside her, a small hope caused by a thought that quivered inside her head, like a flicker of a flame that created a wildfire. This thought, this flicker, continued to echo inside her head, almost consoling her, soothing the cuts that made her bleed inside:

Tensaiga.

She looked up to Sesshomaru, her dark eyes shining brightly. Perhaps it was not too late, perhaps all was not lost! All that was between her and the revival of Inuyasha was a question, a single question. She did not waste time to ask.

She parted her lips to speak, but Sesshomaru returned her gaze, and hushed her.

"I know what you are thinking. I can see your desire within your eyes. But I must confirm, miko, that as soon as Inuyasha died his soul left his body, so not even the Tensaiga can return him to life. It was as if, he wanted to leave this world as soon as his body failed. I could sense this as I looked at him earlier." Sesshomaru stated, his voice stern and discomforting.

Kagome could not say anything. She could not even cry. She almost expected it, almost knew the answer before she even asked the question.

But still, now, there was no hope. The only bit that remained of him was that that resided in her memories. And this, more than anything, left her feeling bitter, but lost in a sense of helplessness.

"Sesshomaru?" She breathed, her body heaving in effort as she propped herself up on her arms.

He looked down at her, his eyes shining like steel.

"Why did you save me?" She questioned, her voice hoarse and ragged from a parched throat. Her eyes shimmered; the deep caverns of her irises surprisingly empty, at loss of any emotion he thought it would contain.

"I felt your life was worth saving. Maybe I was mistaken." He said coldly, his voice carrying a tenor of hostility.

"My life? The life of a human girl who has gotten in your way more times than none? Perhaps I am mistaken as well, but I think, Sesshomaru, you only saved me because you felt you had to."

"And if that is the case, why dwell on something that cannot be changed? You are alive. You will be well once more. How is that not the wish of any after a long battle?" His voice softened as he stared at her dirty face that suddenly looked down. He could smell fresh tears beginning to form without having to peer at her eyes, and he saw her shoulders shake silently as she brought her fingers to her face and covered her eyes.

Sesshomaru pitied Kagome, but could only have little sympathy for her while he watched her weep.

Kagome looked up, wiping away stray tears from her cheeks. Sesshomaru looked into her almond-colored eyes once more, this time only seeing sadness, a deep, mourning, heart-wrenching sorrow. Her lips parted to speak, her chin trembling lightly.

"Why didn't you just leave me there, Sesshomaru? Couldn't you, if anyone, tell I was an animal already dying? Why didn't you end my misery, or at least leave me there so I could do it myself?"

Sesshomaru was slightly surprised at her sudden outburst. Was her misery so great that she rather die than live out the rest of her simple life?

"Do not tell this Sesshomaru what he should or should not have done. I did what I felt best. I did not consider petty emotions at the time nor something as trivial as suicide. If I knew how you felt at the time, I would have saved my breath and time and left you. But even still I know dying is not what you truly wish." He studied her features carefully, noticing her eyes were beginning to fill with tears that she immediately wiped away.

Her head bowed low once more, her bangs shadowing her eyes.

"Of course it isn't." She replied quietly.

"I only wish for him to be with me once more. I would rather hear his voice call to me again than any other sound on Earth. It has only been a day, yet I feel a million years worth of pent up emotions course through my body. I do not wish to die. But if it will reunite me with him, then that is what I must do."

Sesshomaru did not reply, but instead looked up to the sky, which was now clear and an earthy tone of blue and light lavender.

Kagome smiled weakly.

"Look at me. I'm rambling on like a fool. I know you can only pretend to understand how I'm feeling right now. You can only pretend to even care. I don't mean to burden you with my pain, it's just…he's left me to walk this world alone. And besides the grief and pain and anger...I just miss him, I miss him more than anything. He's left me feeling so empty…so dead…"

"You have family left, do you not?" Sesshomaru inquired suddenly.

"I do. But my mother is the only one who understands my feelings for him. In fact, she has comforted me many times after I returned home after one of our arguments," Kagome stifled a sob, "But I don't even think I could face her, and tell her why I would be staying permanently. Besides, this is my home more than present day is. At least I still have a purpose here, to collect the remaining jewel shards, and then I might return. I might." Apprehension and deep thought washed over Kagome's face. She bit the inside of her lip in contemplation.

"And what of the monk, and the little kitsune you care for?"

"I do not know what has become of them. But I do not wish to go looking for them, for I am unsure how I would tell them our quest together is over and we must part our separate ways." Kagome explained.

"You will, in time." He stated flatly.

"Perhaps." She said bleakly.

She thought for a second. What would she do? What did her future hold besides emptiness and remorse? But she could not have answer those questions, for they were just like other questions that were scattered among her thoughts, questions that could only be answered as time continued on, however slow.

Her hidden contemplation was disturbed by the speaking of Sesshomaru.

"And Kagome, what of your wounds? I presume they will not heal easily on their own." Sesshomaru observed. She was, in fact, covered from head to toe in many gashes and cuts, still oozing thick blood and other fluids. Her strange outfit was now dry and stained brown, torn in too many places to count.

"Oh…those…I had forgotten they were there." She remarked, looking down at her body stupidly.

"I find it difficult to believe you could have forgotten about them. You are in much pain, ne?" Sesshomaru questioned, though his voice empty of any concern.

"Yes, but not from them. My whole body feels numb. I ache inside, and the wounds are merely there to remind me of how I have lost him." She stated bitterly, her voice so empty and hollow it could have flown away in the breeze.

"I sense deceit in your voice." He replied.

She looked at him with an expression he could not explain. Her ashen face carried no emotion but acrimony, and her empty almond eyes peered deeply into his.

"It does not hurt, Sesshomaru." She stated coolly, each word leaving a trace of melancholy in the warm air.

But this time he did believe her. The numbness she described reflected in her eyes, just like pain had earlier.

"Perhaps you should clean them, at the least. But I have no say in this. Do as you wish." He suggested, removing his back from the tree he had been leaning on.

"No, not until I bury…Inuyasha." Her voice seemed to crack at his name, as well as the mask she had tried to wear and cover up what she was really feeling. It seemed everything she had been trying to hold in, throughout the whole conversation, was starting to release itself, and she was helpless to stop it.

"I will leave you alone at this time, Kagome." Sesshomaru dismissed himself, walking away from her, his figure soon swallowed whole by the trees and foliage he had begun to walk into.

"T-thank you, Sesshomaru-sama." She called after him, and then quietly stood.

It was then that she realized how truly exhausted she had become. She was tired of crying, tired of the emotions that continued to eat away the little she had left inside. She was tired of the life she continued to exist in, a life she felt was not worth living.

But she had to continue.

And so she did. But she was afraid, almost unprepared for the scene that awaited her.

Kagome began to weep silently again, this time not bothering to wipe away the new falling of tears. Her body shook softly and trembled, her legs threatening to buckle under her as she began the descent of a broad hill.

It would not be much longer until she reached the field: the field drenched in blood and her past memories as venomous as her nightmares, the field where the body of Inuyasha still remained.

---

The morning sky was a merciless gray, the clouds of the previous storm now cleared, and the sun started to rise above the crest of the mountains in the distance, its yellow face casting pink streaks across the horizon.

Kagome sat underneath the same pine tree she had all night. Her face remained motionless, her body stiffened and rigid as if she was made of stone. She kneeled before a mound of dug up dirt, her soiled hands placed delicately on her lap. She continued to stare at a bundle of wild flowers she had picked the previous day; the light peddles leaving an imprint in the soft earth on which it rested. Occasionally, a small tear would glimmer under her eye, but she ignored it as if it were nothing more than the air around her.

Sesshomaru crept towards her in the bushes and trees. He did not wish to return to her, but he knew he could not abandon what he had begun. And besides, he had a new fascination with the miko. He yearned to know how his brother managed to take her heart in his hands to the grave. He yearned to know why she mourned for him so.

Kagome could obviously detect his presence, for as he moved closer, her back became rigid and tense. Soon he broke the last layer of foliage, and stood in the calm gray light, his eyes fixed on hers as she turned around slowly.

Her face was lined with exhaustion. An exhaustion that suggested that she was helpless, even trapped.

"What are you doing here?" She questioned, her voice quiet and small, almost hesitant to come out of her throat.

Sesshomaru stared at her.

"Why abandon what I have started?"

Kagome shook her head slightly. She hated when he answered her question with another question. But she had no energy to respond, and was greatly fatigued from no sleep.

"You have buried him, ne?" Sesshomaru asked, feeling incapable of breaking the silence that was weaved around them.

"Yes. It is finished. He is no more." She stated quietly, looking back at the dirt mound behind her.

"Hai." He replied, his eyes also following hers to the mound.

"Where does the Tetsusaiga lay now?" Sesshomaru inquired suddenly, almost forgetting at that moment how he had tried to steal it in the past.

"Why do you want to know?" Kagome snapped back suddenly. She still felt the need to protect Inuyasha's beloved sword, though now it held no purpose.

Sesshomaru sighed inwardly, and looked at Kagome.

"I do not wish to steal it. There would be no purpose if I can barely touch the handle of the sword. Besides, even I do not steal from the dead, especially not the likes of my own blood."

Kagome looked surprised at his answer. Did he really have that much respect for his deceased brother? No, probably not. But she felt it was safe to tell him.

"I buried it with him, Sesshomaru. That way he'll be able to protect himself even in the lands beyond. Besides, he cherished it more than anything, and he should always have possession over it." Kagome explained, gently patting the dirt mound.

Sesshomaru nodded.

"And besides, what else would I do with it?" She questioned, an innocent curiosity spreading across her face.

"Perhaps keep it with you. Sometimes it takes more than a memory of a face to remind you of a person you have lost." Sesshomaru responded.

"It is not mine to keep. Besides, I think it's too much of a burden to be a memento." Kagome responded, negating his suggestion.

Once again, an awkward gaze connected, and a silence cloaked the two. At this point, Sesshomaru could not stand it any longer.

"Miko, I suppose I'm really here because I need to know something. I need to know why you continue to mourn for my brother, and what causes you to be so stricken with grief. I cannot understand why, and won't leave until I know."

Kagome was stricken with surprise. Sesshomaru didn't seem like the type who would be worried with such a 'trivial' matter. But, she was oddly relieved. Someone in the lonely world was interested in what she felt – maybe even cared.

"Sesshomaru, you don't know how it feels to lose someone?" She questioned.

Her question was so simple, yet he did not know how to answer it.

"I suppose you could say I'm indifferent to many emotions. This is an example of why I am." He replied, his voice dull.

"But the good emotions – happiness, love, triumph – it cancels out the bad. They are what makes life worth living." She advised.

"And you're experiencing many of those good emotions right now, I imagine." He said with a taste of sarcasm.

"That's not the point." She replied, her eyes darkened with defeat.

"Then what is?" He retorted.

Kagome was silent. She sighed, and parted her lips to speak. But the words didn't come, and seemed stuck in her throat. But slowly, and softly, the words began to pour out.

"I loved him…Sesshomaru. Despite his imperfections, despite his undying love with Kikyou, I could not help but fall deeply in love with him." She confessed, twirling hair around her finger.

"If you loved him, you would be able to move on and accept that death is the curse of life, no matter who it concerns and when. You would be able to see that though his body is gone, he lives on in other ways." Sesshomaru argued.

"And you would know?" Kagome's eyes glinted with a touch of anger, and her voice was as sharp as daggers.

"I may not have felt the way you do, but I am no fool. Neither does it take one to know what I have stated. Perhaps you want to deny whatever you are feeling, however, I have no power to stop you."

Kagome looked away. She was torn between what to say.

But, she decided to take the risk. What's not spoken is later regretted.

"It's my fault." She mumbled, almost admitting it to herself.

"We were ambushed by demons. We were very outnumbered, but we were starting to tip the battle in our favor. Inuyasha ordered me to stand behind him, because he didn't want me to get hurt. This angered me a little, because he always used to do that. I know he was just protecting me, but I can take care of myself. Anyways, there was a big demon coming towards him. I decided to step out from behind him and shoot at it, to help him out. But when I reached for my arrow, I fumbled with it and it fell to the ground. Before I could react, the demon was upon me, and Inuyasha was too far away to help me. I felt it bite into my side, but before it could bite any deeper, Inuyasha cut its head off. At that time, another demon was able to get him in the back. Though the blow wasn't fatal, it was what eventually killed him." She added. Her voice was shaky and torn between sadness and anger.

"It was a matter of coincidences." Sesshomaru stated flatly, as if entirely missing her point.

"No, it was a matter of me being brave and stupid at the same time." She retorted, her eyes beginning to glaze over with tears.

"You did what you thought best. The rest was fate. It was inevitable, and nothing you could have done would have stopped it." He argued once more.

"If I haven't moved at all, Inuyasha wouldn't have died. But I didn't obey him. I let my ego get in the way and now-"

"You don't know that. If you didn't do that, maybe you both would have died. You cannot judge what would have happened by what you did or didn't do. Accept what did happen, and it will be easier for you." He suggested, cutting her short.

Kagome was blown over by his lack of sensitivity. The anger that was inside her now fueled her sadness, and she couldn't help but weeping.

"Sesshomaru, can't you see? Can't you tell what I've done? I've killed him! It was ME, no one else. It's all my fault he's gone now, and that he's not coming back!" She fell into a fit of hysterics, bending her body over his grave.

Sesshomaru could not think of anything to comfort the miko, but could only place a sullen eye upon her shaking body.

"I did what I did, and I can't take it back. I can't fix it. I can only live with it, day by day, and remember the life I took from him!" She added, the embers of a weak fire glowing in her eyes.

"I suppose. But you must remember that he did sacrifice himself for you, in a way. Saving you led to his own demise. You did not tell him to do that, he did it of his own free will. When you accept that, only then will you be able to move on."

Somehow, Kagome was beginning to feel a little better. Sesshomaru seemed to be talking some sense into her, and (she added with a touch of sarcasm) keep her from the edge of madness.

"I will try. But I still can't help feeling I am to blame." She sniffed, wiping away the last of her tears.

"Naturally." He replied curtly.

Kagome looked away, her face hushed and withdrawn in thought. A memory came to mind, a memory that made her smile – the first time in days.

It was also, at this moment, Sesshomaru felt something course through his body. It was something he had never felt before, like the tips of butterfly wings that fluttered freely inside him, yet at the same time, it felt like a swarm of wasps. He could not explain it, nor understand it. And before he could do anything, Kagome spoke.

"I remember the first time I met him. He was so peaceful, despite being pinned to a tree. I remember, the first thing I did was walked right up to him and tugged on both his ears," Kagome smiled, the recollection of this memory obviously touching her deep inside, "I know if I did that again, and when he was conscious, he would probably kill me. But still, that first moment with him, it was probably the happiest moment in my life, for it was the starting point of something new and exciting. Not to mention, his ears were pretty darn cute." Kagome laughed softly, but then lowered her head even more. Sesshomaru could see a soft glimmer of a tear that slid down her nose and fell to her folded hands.

"What bothers you now, Kagome?" He asked, his voice surprisingly soft. He could hear her sigh softly.

"I guess everything in life, every moment, every existence, anything…it has to come to an end." She looked up to him, her eyes starry. "And I took everything for granted."

"I suppose we all take advantages of moments in our life because we think they will repeat themselves. We take advantage of people because we are unaware that they can slip from our grasp at any moment." Sesshomaru remarked thoughtfully, his eyes tracing the boughs of the tree above them.

"Yes. And now I've lost him. I've lost everything." Her voice choked on the last three words.

"The memory of him still lives on, ne?"

"Yes, but I've come to realize that it's not the loss of him that hurts the most. It's the memory of him that stays with me. I wish I could forget…but then what would I have left to remember? He gives me comfort though he is the one causing my pain. I'm imprisoned Sesshomaru, imprisoned within myself and my pain. What can set me free?" She explained, her rich brown eyes shining.

Sesshomaru looked down at her. Emotions gripped his body upon seeing her tattered silken face.

He did not know what was going on, and could only act upon instincts.

"Kagome…" He said softly, almost calling to her.

Sesshomaru moved close to Kagome, and she could feel his warm breath tickle the skin of her forehead.

"Kagome," He repeated, and placed a delicate finger on her chin, lifting her face to see his. "You may allow grief to take you captive for now. But do not remain in its prison too long, for if you do, you will never be able to break free."

He removed his finger from her chin and stood, turning from her.

"Sesshomaru?" She called to him as he walked away.

But he was already gone, the warm touch of his finger still lingering on her skin.

---

A soft moan of pain passed the miko's lips. Droplets of water fell down her figure, her black hair plastered to her back, shining brilliantly. Moving a reed aside, she waded behind the long branches of a tree. The sun peeked through the branches, giving Kagome a relief of warmth. Though there were many sharp reeds and branches that pushed up above the water, at least she would be protected from anyone's gaze.

The bath seemed like it a soothing idea. The water looked calm and inviting. Yet, when Kagome entered, her body was overtaken with pain. The water seemed to wrap around her body and then slice into her many cuts, almost forcing them deeper into her skin like thin fluid knives.

Kagome knew it just meant they were being cleansed of dirt and blood. She just wished it wouldn't hurt so much.

She used her hand and washed the side where she had been bitten, the mangled skin sensitive to the briefest, lightest touch. Instinctively, she removed the bits of dirt that still rested within the folds of the skin, knowing it would cause an infection. But another wave of pain overtook her, and she shut her eyes tightly.

Her head became light, and she was consumed by nausea and dizziness. She sat down, her knees digging into the soft dirt floor of the pond. It felt nice, she thought. Though the pain from her wounds still sat in her mind, the water was warm where she sat, resting under a patch of sunlight, and it seemed to be almost like a blanket, lulling her…

A nap would be nice right now, she thought. Very nice…

Her eyes shut, the exhaustion and sleepless nights finally catching up to her. Her mind drifted to sleep, and she let the water gather at her neck. She smiled, finally letting the sleep consume her conscience.

A moment later, a twig snapped in the current, and her eyes opened instantly. She looked around, seeing no one.

Yet, she continued to look around. Sesshomaru was very adapt at hiding himself, and she remembered a while back Inuyasha and Miroku had spied on her and Sango as they were taking their bath. Kagome giggled silently. She could imagine Sesshomaru with a pair of binoculars, hiding behind a bush.

She decided to get out. The water was no longer warm and inviting, but now cold, the current almost seeming like it was pushing her out. Besides, her clothes were probably cleaned by now, just as her body was.

She waded out from behind the branches, covering her body in protection from hiding eyes. She walked quickly through the water, finding her clothes on the shore of the pond. She reached for them, wringing them out in the water. The water was a faint red from the remaining blood, and they were brown, the sand from the shore sticking to them. But they would have to do. Dressing consciously, she pulled herself out of the water, almost clawing at the sand. She was exhausted. But she managed to pull herself into a sitting position, watching the peaceful current of the pond.

She soon heard something move from behind her.

"Hello, Sesshomaru." She knew he had returned yet again.

"Miko." He greeted, his voice devoid of any friendliness.

"What are you doing here, yet again?" She questioned, almost pointlessly.

"I don't know." He replied quickly.

Kagome looked back at him. He was standing near her, his back against a tree, as usual.

"You don't know?" Her voice carried an edge of disbelief.

"Yes." He affirmed, his face giving no hint of any sort of emotion.

She looked back at the pond. She was too tired to question about it any further.

"Nevertheless, I am here."

"Right." She shrugged. She hated when he was so bitter.

Kagome was at loss of what to say. They had talked about how she was feeling, how Inuyasha's death had tremendously effected her. But, what about him? Kagome's mind whizzed. She knew nothing of Sesshomaru, only of his name, and his status as a taiyoukai. But what else? Would it be possible to delve deep inside him, find out things no one else knew? Curiosity tingled inside her. She wanted to try, at the most.

"Sesshomaru, did you ever love your brother? Are you the least bit sad that he is gone now?" She asked, slowly, carefully, trying to add as much sadness to the sentence as it would carry.

"How can you love a sharp rock in your shoe?" He replied at once, his voice stern.

"Well, I guess I can see your reasoning on that. But he is your brother. That is something that you share and will always connect you, no matter what you do to break free from it." Kagome reasoned. She could already tell this was going no where.

Sesshomaru's face remained indifferent.

"Kagome, my brother and I were never close, and he only served as a reminder to me how my father sacrificed himself to save his human mother." Sesshomaru's eyes flashed a certain bitterness she had never seen.

"You would do the same."

"I would not fall for a human such as her in the first place." He retorted, not noticing the sudden hurt that reflected in her eyes.

"You never know." Kagome replied softly.

"Yes, I do." He said clearly.

Kagome decided she wouldn't push it any farther. He was being more stubborn than usual.

"So you're glad he left this world?" She changed the subject quickly.

"No. But I'm not sad either. What is the point of asking me these questions, miko? You know I don't really care for him. And what does it matter now?"

"I guess you know too much about me, and I've yet to know anything about you." She reasoned.

"There is not much to know about me. Not much I would share, anyways." He said, his words frosted.

"Fine. Just answer this to me: have you ever loved anyone?" She put extra emphasis on 'anyone,' though she already knew his answer to her question.

"No. Love is a foolish emotion for any taiyoukai, or any demon for that matter." Sesshomaru's voice was relentlessly sour.

"Well. It certainly can be distracting. You've got better things to do, I suppose." He gave her a cold stare, and then looked away.

"Perhaps I was a fool to love him, as well." She sighed, her eyes trailing a wisp of a cloud in the sky.

"You would have been an even greater fool to not have." Sesshomaru said suddenly.

"But I thought –" She looked at him, her face confused.

"You are not a demon, just a human. What else can you preoccupy yourself with during the day?" Kagome tried to pretend that he was only accidentally belittling her.

"Pain." Kagome muttered, feeling slightly sorry for herself.

"The pain tells you that you're alive." He responded.

"But life shouldn't bring so much pain to one person – it's too great, too vast for one to handle alone." Her eyebrows pinched together.

"With everything comes a price. I'm sure you're aware of that."

"Yes, but I feel like it was for nothing. No reward, and now many obligations. It wasn't like he even returned his affection, and –"

"And with everything comes reason." He cut her off quickly, not wishing to hear her complain of the mistakes she thought she had made.

"There's no reason to the way I'm feeling, that's for sure."

"You're mourning. Perhaps there isn't any reason to mourning, but there's reason for it. Just as there's only one love that exists in this world, but there are many reasons for it."

She nodded. He was right.

"If only I could understand the reason. In fact, all I can do is mourn, but when it comes down to the core of things, I don't know why. I can't explain it. I know with every life comes death. I can accept that. But it seems the reason, the reason to all of this, to my pain most of all, is so obvious, and is right in front of me, somehow invisible."

Kagome wasn't satisfied with her answer. She felt stupid.

"I mean, I have the obvious reasons why I mourn. Just not the real reasons." She corrected herself, more satisfied than before.

"You mourn for his death." He announced, not bothering to question if he was right or not.

"I mourn because he's left me only one way to join him." She corrected, tears pricking her eyes.

"You mourn because he's left you all alone."

Kagome nodded slightly, looking down the shore at the small secluded pool she had just bathed in. The water was tranquil and reflected the colors of the setting sun. A few long branches of a tree touched the face of the pond with dragging leafy fingers, leaving faint ripples that danced across the surface. The subtle hands of the wind tugged on the water reeds, bending them playfully.

Kagome's stomach suddenly lurched, grumbling lowly. She realized she had not had a bite to eat in over a day, though hunger was not something that was on her mind. Besides, she had left her backpack with Sango and Miroku, thinking that she would return later that night. What food could she get now? Perhaps a village nearby would be gracious enough to supply her.

"You are hungry, miko?" Sesshomaru asked.

"Yes. But I will find a village tonight to find food at." She assured him.

"It would be easier to forage for yourself. The closest village is many miles away, a journey you can't complete." He stated, his eyes meeting her own.

"I see." She breathed, her face downcast, her lips playing a frown upon her face.

"There are edible berries on at least every shrub, and plentiful small game – quails, rabbits, pheasants. You shouldn't have any trouble finding a decent meal." He reassured her, but Kagome just wrinkled her nose in distaste.

"I don't have my bow. Perhaps I'll just wait till tomorrow. A few hours won't make any difference, especially if I manage to get any sleep."

Sesshomaru made no reply, but instead, stood up and began to walk away.

And this time, Kagome followed him.

---

A new day was beginning to peek above the horizon, the day's light starting to chase away the shadows of the night.

It was at this time Kagome woke.

Her eyes drifted to the darkened sky that peeked in through the boughs of trees above her head. Sitting up, she looked around, the darkness still seeping in between the trunks of trees, and rested around her like a thick, impenetrable fog.

Still, she could not sense Sesshomaru's presence, even though he had never stayed with her after they talked. He always seemed to leave for one reason or another, eluding her sight, but continuing to wander about her mind.

Looking in front of her she saw the ashes of the fire she had made the previous night. At this Kagome remembered her terrible hunger, the one she hadn't satisfied in over two days. But it didn't matter now. She would never eat a never meal again, she thought.

She stood up, her legs almost buckling with fatigue, her knees shaking slightly. She looked around her, hearing the sounds of the forest as it came to life dance about the air. The air hung low, calm and still, and the light was beginning to creep in through the trees. And besides the forest noises, it was silent. Almost solemn.

Kagome nodded to herself, almost assuring herself something even she did not know. Her mind raced, her eyes darted from tree to tree once more, searching for the certain taiyoukai who always disappeared but then reappeared when Kagome needed someone most. Her eyes scanning, she saw nothing. It was now or never.

She turned around, facing a wall of tree and bushes and grass. Gathering the last bit of energy she stored within herself, she began to run into the forest, crashing through the dark underbrush, not sure which direction she was headed, not caring if every creature had heard her in her flight.

Branches and leaves whipped by her body, scratching her face and bare arms and legs. Her feet sank into the soft ground, and she stumbled many a time on the long, twisted roots of trees. Yet, she continued to run along a path only visible to her, her eyes blinded by darkness, her face stinging from the wind that licked her cuts, her body aching with every stride she made, her lungs threatening to burst as her chest heaved. No longer did thoughts or emotions swarm her mind. It was empty, completely hollow. And yet, it often had an intruder that sometimes wandered in when she let down her guard. An intruder with silver hair and cold, golden eyes.

Soon, she broke the last edge of trees and shrubbery, finding herself on a secluded, open clearing. A perfect view of the sunrise was painted before her, the lands beyond still dark and sleeping.

She took a few steps forward and found herself near the edge of a steep, granite cliff. Below an angry river coursed, its roars and grumbles heard loudly even though she was very high above it. The river swept through the yawning chasm, depositing in a large lake in the distance. Many large rocks grew out of the river, so tall and pointed they looked like sharp teeth the earth could not contain. But the water simply moved around them, swirling about them voraciously in white foam. If only she could do that, she thought. If only she could move around this large obstacle in her life with the easy fluid motion the water possessed. If only…

She looked down at the dark waters below once more.

Every emotion that she had felt the past few days, everything that was trapped within her and trapped her within it began to break free, coursing through her body with the vengeance of a thousand angry souls. She wanted to scream, and to hear her hateful call echo in the canyon, so that every creature could understand her pain, her misery! So that, maybe, she could feel like she was not the only one who had ever felt this way.

And yet, she wanted to just sit there and cry. Cry everything out for the last time, so that not even his memory remained inside her. Maybe, if she was completely empty, she could move on, and make new memories to fill her up once more. But when she beckoned upon her worst memory to shed tears, she could not force herself to even wail. Anger once again filled her mind, rattling inside her like two angry fists. And yet again, the anger fueled a sadness inside her that was almost painful, a misery that was so gut wrenching she felt like throwing up, a pain so vast that she almost fell to the ground in convulsions, a pain that seemed to shake the chasms inside her, the chasms created by the hunger of her despair.

She felt she could no longer take it.

She wanted nothing more than to jump down, fall endlessly until she broke the surface of the river, letting the waters consume her just as her grief consumed her soul. She wanted her body to be carried to the lake, where it could rest on the bottom for all eternity, and she could be free of it, free of its constricting walls, its human limitations, and constant pain that it could only bring and she could never stop.

She wanted nothing more than to be rid of this land and its loneliness, its merciless, it's twisted, gnarled hand that grasped her by the throat, forever suffocating.

Inuyasha.

Tears stung her eyes, her lip trembled.

She took a step further, so that her bare foot was half-way off the cliff and the sharp wind continued to slice at her body, causing her hair to ripple out behind her in streams of raven silk. She opened her arms so that they stretched like wings, and she closed her eyes, as if preparing for a long and expected flight.

Yes. She was ready to leave this world.

And yet, she could not push herself off. She could not bring herself to do it. It was as if a part of her still clung to the world, still clung to the memories of her family, her friends, even those who bodies did not remain next to her. A part of her still clung to Sesshomaru, the only physical remembrance of Inuyasha she had left.

And so, she was torn, once again. The anger, sadness, grief, bitterness – it told her to jump, it told her to let go of everything, and then she could truly be free once more.

She opened her eyes, their almond color reflected with a light pink from the distant sunrise. She let her arms fall to her side, her body heaving with heavy breathing. She looked down the cliff once more, and just stared at the waters below. Sometimes she would feel like backing away, returning to her camp in the forest, to wait patiently for her to see the good in life once again. But mostly, she just stared, wishing that somehow she could have the courage to make herself jump, to make herself end the life she so many times did not want to be a part of. She wished that she could jump, so she could see Inuyasha once more, so that she could end the pain.

Time seemed to stop. Kagome didn't even notice a tall figure that walked into the clearing behind her. Not until the figure spoke, his silver hair tussled in the breeze.

"What are you doing, Kagome?" He asked, his voice soft, almost unheard by the roaring of the river below.

He knew the answer to the question he asked, and he knew what Kagome intended to do. But he did not want to present himself so aggressively, not in a delicate situation as this.

"Ending it. Ending it all." She did not turn around, but her body tensed, as if his presence made her more determined than before.

"That would be terribly foolish." He stated, walking closer to her, then stopping.

At this, Kagome's body relaxed in a tired, natural way, and she turned around. Her face was pale, almost ghostly, and her eyes were cold, her emotion almost retreated within herself to where not even Sesshomaru could detect it.

"It would be foolish for me not to, Sesshomaru-sama." She addressed him, moving her feet forward so that both were on the solid ground.

"I am exhausted, Sesshomaru. I can barely breathe, barely think, and even then my judgment is blinded by anger and misery and a sense of betrayal. I am angry at myself for letting it go this far, but also at him, Sesshomaru. He has caused this; he has left me without speaking a word of love or apology. But that is not the worst of it. I know you can't feel what I'm feeling. But know that the only way to end this pain and be with him again is to end my mortal life." Her voice was sad but hollow, so sad that Sesshomaru could not help but feeling a tinge of melancholy within him.

"If you die right now you may never be with him anyways. You do not know where his spirit rests. Kagome, just live so you can remember him. You are young. It may seem like the end, but it may also be a new beginning for you." He stated, her face remaining indifferent.

"I will find him. My spirit will be drawn to his, I am sure of that." She replied, her voice weak of confidence.

He let her continue.

"I am completely empty, Sesshomaru. It feels like my happy memories escaped my body as soon as they had the chance. I gave him all the love I could, and now I can give him no more. I cried for days over his loss, and now I can not shed even a tear. Now only pain remains. A pain greater than any physical pain." She explained, her voice steady, unwavering.

"I will jump now, whether you want me to or not. I will let the waters below wash over my body, cleanse my soul of the pain it has felt, ridden me of many burdens and many regrets. I will do it now, Sesshomaru." She said sharply, her words pouring out of her mouth.

There was a long silence. Sesshomaru studied her, and Kagome stood rigid, not sure of what to do or what to say.

Then, Sesshomaru surprisingly, shook his head. "If you were going to jump, Kagome, you would have already. Now stop being foolish and give me your hand."

Kagome's eyes reduced to slits, glinting with bitter annoyance.

"I am no fool, Sesshomaru. Maybe maddened by his lost. Deprived of any happiness. But I know this life is not worth living. I know it hold no purpose." She repeated, her eyes suddenly aflame with emotions, many of them, swarming within her irises like the milky water of a forgotten pond.

"But it does have a purpose, Kagome. All lives are created to teach someone a lesson, to complete something in them they did not possess when they were born. You may think now that it did have a purpose, but fails to have one any longer. You are mistake. Its purpose, to you at least, is to show you how to overcome great pain, to overcome the loss of someone close to you, a lover. To overcome what you thought impossible, without ending it altogether." He reasoned, and she in turn shook her head.

"You are wrong, Sesshomaru. I have made up in my mind to what I must do now. And you can't do anything to stop me." Kagome turned from Sesshomaru. She moved herself even closer to the cliff. This time, Sesshomaru could sense she was not faking, that was going to do it for real; he could sense her legs slightly crouching, her heart racing within her chest. He only had a second, one moment, or else she would be gone – her toes dug into the cliff face, her arms outstretched, only one moment, one second –

As quick as lightning, he took a few steps further and grasped her wrist suddenly, wrenching her from the edge of the cliff.

"Let go!" She whispered harshly, wriggling her arm to break free. "Let me go!" She repeated, her body straining against his immovable strength.

"No. Not until you promise me something, Kagome." He grabbed her arm and forced her body to stand still, very closely to his. She looked up at him with a malice twisted in her face.

"Promise me that you will not throw yourself off this cliff." He said lowly, his voice menacing.

She did not say anything, and looked away. He jerked her arm.

"Promise me." He growled, his grip tightening about her wrist, causing the flesh to become white.

"I-I promise." She stuttered, her voice faltering.

"Promise me you will let me companion you to the next village, where you will remain until you are well." He asked, his voice less venomous than before.

"I promise." She said, her voice stronger now, but heavy with defeat.

"And most of all, promise me that you will live out the rest of your simple life, whether it is here or in your time." He stated, this time his voice worn down by patience.

For a long time Kagome stared up at Sesshomaru, her almond eyes unmoving.

"I promise." She breathed.

"Good." He let go of her, and she rubbed her wrists softly, messaging out their pain.

"Follow me." He commanded. Kagome could do nothing but follow behind, much like an obedient dog, its feral side bred and trained out of it, so that only what had it had been trained to do remained.

And so, the cold taiyoukai, Lord of the Western Lands, led the injured human girl to a village below the cliff on the shores of the lake. After situating her with a meal and a night's rest, he disappeared, almost evaporating in the heat waves of the scorching day. He did not say goodbye, nor did Kagome; it was almost a mutual divide, and a mutual thanks between the two.

But he had done more than lead her to a village. He had saved her life on numerous occasions, talked some sense into her when she only heard whispers of pain, companioned her when no one else would. In a way, he had saved her from herself. Kagome would realize this soon enough, and then, as time crept by, she would learn to appreciate it.

But it would be five years until she thanked him in person.

---

Kagome's life had taken an unexpected twist.

After Sesshomaru had left her at the village by the lake, she felt obligated to repay them for the food, housing, and hospitality they provided her when she needed it the most. They questioned her hobbies, skills, and professions, trying to figure out when she could do. She stated she had once been called a miko, and held the powers of a priestess. The elder healer of the village suggested that she help heal who she could, and she could leave whenever she wished. But, instead, she decided to stay with the village, becoming the elder healer's apprentice. She learned many things from the old lady, who reminded her much of Kaede. Most of all, the village accepted her, asking none of her history or of her family, and only of her name.

And so, bit by bit, Kagome began to pick up the broken pieces of her shattered life, and fit everything back together.

Yet, there was a piece missing, as there was a piece of flesh missing from within her body. She could feel it many times, feel the loneliness and emptiness that rested within it. She grew to accept it as if was a relative that had come to live with her permanently. She realized it was there because Inuyasha had once been there, and the hole, the missing piece, is what remained.

But it had been many years since then, and though Inuyasha had never completely left her mind, and sometimes she would gaze at the dark cerulean waters of the river and lake where she almost flung herself into, she knew she had to move on.

Three years after living at the village, the elder healer passed, leaving Kagome to be the only healer left, the village Priestess. And with this title came new obligations. She could not waste time continuing to grieve for Inuyasha when many come to her with wounds and illnesses. Yet even through the busy days, she felt her mind wander. What had become of Sango and Miroku? Most importantly, what of her real family? When Inuyasha died, she had left most of her friends and relatives hanging. But she knew, someday, she would set out to find them. She just didn't know when.

Kagome woke to the chatter of many people. Dressing quickly, she stumbled outside, finding a large group of village women waiting outside their huts. Most were talking vividly, and Kagome decided it would be alright to eavesdrop.

"I hear a large platoon is coming in this afternoon. Many are wounded, and seek the help of our Priestess." A woman stated, switching her child from one arm to the other.

"Yes, apparently they had a rough battle with a group of demons they came upon. They had to flee." Another woman shook her head gingerly.

Kagome stepped back into the shade of her hut, sweat already dripping from her forehead and the back of her neck. It was going to be another scorching day.

But she had other things to worry about. Kagome didn't have to worry about demons or Naraku, after becoming a Priestess at the village. She kept the Shikon no Tama within lockbox in her hut, not mentioning it to anyone, even forgetting about it herself. But now, a band of demons roamed the area near the village. Were they searching for her? Did news of Inuyasha's death and the split of his group reached the ears of Naraku? Kagome could not tell, and she began to fear the day that was ahead of her.

But no soldiers came. Neither did the demons.

Kagome waited all day, occasionally peeking out her doorway. She was authentically bored. No one required her help or powers; she had cleaned up her hut the day before, and stocked up on food and supplies. It was too hot to go out and forage for herbs. She could hear the laughter of the children in the lake. She would join them, but, too many memories haunted the lake like water nymphs, waiting to pull her down the bottom.

So, she was stuck within her hut. The heat seemed to slip in through every crack, and Kagome's kimono was not exactly the lightest material. She decided to read a book. But even then, her mind seemed elsewhere, and she had to read over words many times before it stuck in her head. She gave up on that as well, putting the book aside.

Soon the day began to slip from underneath her, and the night rolled in from behind the hills. Kagome uttered a sigh of relief. It seemed like day dragged on forever, and the night would never come.

She wandered outside, the air still hot and muggy, but cooler than before. She wandered down a path, finding her way to the lake.

She sat down on the shoreline, the water stretching forward, licking her toes. Kagome stared at the lake, the deep cerulean reflecting in her eyes. The lake seemed to lull her with its repeating noises: the splashing of water, the tides of small waves as it hit the ground, the wind that seemed to skit above the water. But it was peaceful, almost comforting. Kagome sat, thinking, letting the lake breeze wrap around her being. She stared at the surface, seeing the reflection of the moon, and how one ripple caused it shake and disappear, and then reappear with a new wave.

She turned her face up to the heavens. The moon peered above a thin horizon of tall trees, its white face glowing like porcelain in the twilight. But, with the dying of the day's light and the remnants of the sunset, it looked almost red, like a crimson heart or ruby ball; it looked almost like it was bleeding. Kagome gasped. In its eerie beauty, she saw something else, a fragment of a person or place; a memory not easily forgotten.

At that moment, she could think only of her past lover's brother.

And then she returned to her hut and slept.

---

She was floating in an ethereal darkness….but it was warm darkness, maybe how a baby would feel secure in their mother's womb.

She thought she heard voices reach out to her, almost solid though, like hands or limbs. Faces and places flashed by, like a reel of photographs.

- white hair – fangs - the twang of a bow -

Kagome!

- a purple tunnel - a wooden well - a little boy laughing -

I promise I'll protect you.

- a bicycle wheel turning - a broken mirror - a yellow flash -

I was happy to have you by my side.

The voice sounded so familiar, yet so distant. Every time she would try to find the person calling to her, the voice seemed to evade her, disappearing in another shroud within the darkness of her dream.

Suddenly she felt an immense feeling that seemed to sweep over her and overtake her thoughts. It was a fervent, desperate feeling, one that suggested she was in perilous position, yet a position that awakened something inside her that hadn't been known before. She felt new warmth around her in the darkness, and she felt herself saying, almost in a whisper, almost a reassurance-

I like you…just the way you are…

She began to reach out into the darkness – she felt like she was about to succeed: an item, a realization, was almost in her grasp-

Something prodded her shoulder, and the darkness was shattered by a sharp light. Kagome squinted, her head dizzy and disoriented.

"Lady Kagome, sorry to wake you, but there's a little man here that wishes to speak to you right away." The village girl reported. Her face was washed with shame, and she looked down.

"He says there's a girl that is deathly ill at his master's manor, and requires the aid of a priestess as yourself." She added, continuing to look down at the dirt floor.

"Do you know the name of this little man?" Kagome asked kindly, rubbing her eyes as she sat up from her sleeping mat. In the back of her mind her dream seemed to fade away, to the point it seemed like it never happened.

"No, but he's very odd looking. Green, almost toad-like, with a big wooden staff and an annoying, arrogant voice."

A spark lit inside Kagome. This man seemed familiar, very familiar, like she had met him before.

"Very well. Tell him I will be right out." Kagome ordered.

The girl bowed and scampered out of the village house.

Kagome sighed as she fitted her kimono over her shoulders. Now she would never know the meaning of her dream, and most of all, it would nag her for the rest of the day, the mystery voice never revealed.

And most of all, she had a deathly ill girl at a manor that was awaiting a visit from her, and her patience was past being tried. But she was grateful for the life she now had, and she had to heal the girl, no matter how she was feeling or what she wanted to do instead.

Stepping outside, a cool breeze greated her with air-like hands. She smiled in return. At least I would not be a terribly hot day, and because of that, things were looking up.

She began to walk, her shoes digging into the sand and gravel. She squinted, trying to find this 'green man.' But she had trouble seeing, for the bright light blinded her. She walked towards the gate of the village, below a broad hill. She saw a short figure, almost like a shadow, beyond it. Using her hand as a visor, she walked quickly, blindly, towards the gate. When she was close, she heard her name called out.

That was when she looked at the figure.

Kagome's eyes widened.

"Jaken?" She breathed, her face frozen in astonishment.

"Miko, Rin has fallen ill at the manor. Lord Sesshomaru has called for your help, hearing of your healing powers at this village." His whiny voice reported, his face stretched into a forced smile. He was never fond of Kagome.

Sesshomaru…

Inuyasha's brother…

She was lost in her thoughts. She remembered he had saved her many times, and left her at the village she now stayed at. Why did he require the aid of her, when there were many other priestesses?

Jaken looked at her in annoyance, expecting an answer.

"Do you know what illness she has? That will help me pick out what herbs I should use." Kagome asked, her mind still drifting, picking through her memories.

"No. But she has had a sweltering fever for many days, a blistering headache, and is too weak to even get out of bed or to eat." He responded, counting his fingers as he listed her symptoms.

"Sounds like the flu." Kagome remarked, remembering how she had it once or twice years ago, when she lived in present day Japan.

"The what?" Jaken looked at her as if she was a fool.

"Is the journey long?" Kagome inquired suddenly, ignoring Jaken's confusion. She did not wish a long journey.

"A half a day walking." Jaken replied.

Kagome nodded. That wasn't too bad, especially if Rin's life was on the line. She adored the child when she had known her, her innocence almost magnetic to anyone.

"Alright. Let me go get my supplies. I will be out in, at most, ten minutes." She replied, turning around. She could feel Jaken's scornful looked burn into the back of her head, and she made haste as she walked away.

Reaching her hut, her mind almost exploded with thoughts, questions, feelings – Kagome decided to keep it under control and ignore it. When journeyed to the manor, she would have plenty of time to think, and plenty of time to panic, if that is what she wished. Still, she could feel some thoughts creep into her mind, and she could only swat them away like pesky flies.

Finding her medical bag near her cot, she picked out a few herbs that she knew would help the symptoms. Some she would mix in with tea, others Rin would be forced to eat by themselves. She also grabbed a few bandages, just in case, and a few salves the elder healer had taught her to make. Putting these gingerly in her pack, she walked outside her doorway, also grabbing a canteen of water and two apples at the last minute.

Soon Jaken and Kagome were on their way. The little village by the lake disappeared quickly, and Kagome often looked back, only seeing the sparkling waters of the lake as her horizon. And soon, even that disappeared.

The day was warm, the breeze friendly.

Yet, Kagome couldn't pay attention to it. Her mind was clouded by questions she couldn't find the answers to.

Why had he picked her to come, when there were many other priestesses available? Was he even there? Would she see him again? How long would she stay?

Memories she thought she would never remember again flooded her mind. Her and Sesshomaru were near a mound of dirt, under the shade of a forest, by a tranquil pond, near the edge of a large cliff. She saw images of her crying in her mind, and they left an unsetting feeling in her stomach. It was almost as if it was reawakening her pain, the one that lay dormant within her for four years. She decided to think about something else. She couldn't be emotional – not now.

She looked up. The sky began to darken into a rich purple. The sun was setting in the west, and the moon was peeking shyly behind the crest of the mountains. She looked away.

The moon.

They had been walking for hours. But she had been so absorbed, in her worries, apprehension, thoughts, questions, everything – that she had lost track of time. She had pretty much zoned out, and to her surprise, when she zoned back in, a castle was in a yards reach. She quickened her step, Jaken's clothed back becoming larger and larger in her sight, until they stopped, side by side, in front of two huge wooden doors.

At last, they had reached the manor.

Jaken opened one of the two huge wooden doors, and they creaked and moaned until they hit the wall beyond. Kagome stepped in and gasped. The manor was huge. Yet, it was open, almost empty, with little furniture. It seemed forlorn, almost like even the floors echoed lonely.

It was also cold. Very cold. Kagome could feel the chill rest on her skin, until she shivered and shook it off.

"Where is Rin?" Kagome asked, looking around the spacious rooms.

Jaken did not reply, but instead motioned for her to follow. He led her through many rooms, until they reached a grand staircase. It split into two separate staircases, spiraling upwards into two different towers like snakes. She figured Rin was in one of these towers, isolated at the very top. She placed her foot on the first step, preparing to heave her medical sack as she ascended the climb.

Jaken stopped her, hissing for here to wait here at the bottom of the steps.

Kagome was puzzled. Perhaps someone else was to show her where Rin was. At any rate, she was alone now, Jaken already disappearing in the dark of another hallway. It was quiet, almost unfriendly. She let her bag fall to the ground out of her hands, standing there uncomfortably, her legs aching from the walk.

She looked around, taking in every detail of his home that she could. The ceiling was high. The floor was stone. The manor was dark because the windows were covered with gray curtains. This is what she expected it to look like. Cold, dark, empty.

Kagome heard a creak from the staircase up above. Apprehension filled her. Soon all she could hear was the hard thumping of her heart. Was it Sesshomaru? Or was it someone else? Kagome closed her eyes, taking a deep breath to calm herself. She opened them once more.

She forgot how to breathe.

He was there.

She could only stare at him. He only stared at her in return, his eyes relentless, his face devoid of anything as it had always been.

He looked exactly the same. She looked different. Five years had passed, and Kagome had fully bloomed. But, even though her body had matured, her bangs had grown out and her hair was much longer, her face was still the same. It looked almost childish, very young, and somewhat innocent.

And as the silence wrapped around them, thick and persistent, she realized something. She knew that she was asked to come here, but for a different reason. She just didn't know what, and she had to find out.

She finally spoke. "Rin's not really sick, is she?"'

Sesshomaru remained quiet, but his gaze did not falter.

"No." He said simply, sounding almost like a child who had been caught lying.

"Then why am I here?" She questioned once more. And this time, he didn't answer.

"Just tell me, Sesshomaru. Whether you do or not, I will return back to my village. But I rather not feel disappointed." She explained. His eyes left hers.

"No." He said suddenly, almost forcefully, like a quiet command.

Kagome stood in awe. He didn't want her to leave? Yet confusion also grasped her. What was going on?

He sighed, his whole body heaving. He looked defeated, beaten at his own game.

"Don't leave. There's something I need to explain. Something I've been waiting to explain to you since the day I left you at the lake." He said quietly. His voice lacked any edge, any sharp bitterness as it always had.

Suddenly his eyes were alight with a glow, almost a determination. Kagome shrunk within herself. She didn't know what to expect.

It was quiet for a moment. He opened his mouth to speak, and then pursed his lips, as if he was at a loss of what to say.

But then, words came pouring out of his mouth, as if he couldn't stop. The uneasy silence around them was broken, discarded.

"I stayed with you for days Kagome. I listened to you. I watched your tears fall. Not because I felt obligated, not because I was trying to get as much information from you about Inuyasha as possible. Only because I wanted to, Kagome. And not for selfish reasons, either. From the moment I talked to you, it was as if you attracted me to you, almost as if you entranced me, something like an untold secret, like I was the first to discover this in the world. You were so…different than anything I had known. Different because you were what you were – alive! I watched you talk, I listened and for the first moment in my life – I felt. I felt your pain. You made me feel it, you almost pushed it over me, and you drowned me with it. I couldn't stop it. I could only breathe it in. And when I left you at that village, I lost that. I became indifferent again. And I missed it. I –" He stopped, his words faltering, his eyes lowered to his feet.

He looked up once more, staring straight into her eyes.

"I missed you."

Kagome sucked in suddenly, her eyes widening slightly in surprise. Him? Sesshomaru? Miss her? She couldn't believe it. But his eyes held no shame, held no deceit. He had stayed with her. He had saved her.

"I-"

She couldn't force a single word out. She didn't know how to react. What to say. What to do. Did she miss him? Did she think about him more than Inuyasha? Did she? Did she wish to see him again when she was at the village? Was this the moment she had been waiting nights and nights for? Her thoughts were jumbled. Her lip trembled. Tears threatened to fall, holding themselves on her eyelids.

Sesshomaru looked at her, almost peeking at her shyly.

"And so, I wanted to find you again. I wanted you to talk to me, make me feel alive; make me feel like no one else had. I wanted to see you. I've been waiting every day for five years to see you. It may seem like a surprise, like it was something you would have never expected. I hadn't either. When I had first felt it, I was ashamed. I felt weak. For the first time, something had exposed me, a mere human had, yet also strengthening me with something more powerful than any sword. Any magic. It was you, Kagome. You engraved yourself inside me, you gave me a wound that I couldn't find and couldn't heal." Sesshomaru described. His face remained shameless, yet held a look like he was relieving a great burden.

Kagome realized then they were much more alike then she had thought.

"I too, have a wound, Sesshomaru. When Inuyasha died, he left a spot in me that I knew could never be filled up, could never disappear. I knew the only –" She stopped herself. Sesshomaru glanced at her, his eyes questioning.

Kagome knew then. The throbbing of the empty spot within stopped. She knew. Sesshomaru. His cold eyes, meaningful words. Sesshomaru. His elusive ways, his bitter tendencies. Sesshomaru. It was the gone, the emptiness within. Gone, because he had filled it. He had caused this, given her so much more than he knew. It was him, all along. Not Inuyasha. It was him. She knew it all along, too, but was just blinded by her pain. And then, and now, he made her see, made her understand when no one else could – and she took this in, and she reveled in its appearance.

"I too, have been waiting." She muttered, so lowly he could barely hear her.

Kagome walked up the stairs. Sesshomaru watched her. What was she doing? His heart began to skip in almost a panicky way, like jumpy fingers on a piano. She was a few feet away. Then two steps. And then, she was right there, right in front of him – so alive and real and beautiful. He almost touched her. But not quite.

And then she did what he had not expected. She wrapped her arms around him. His body stiffened, his mind was frozen. He felt trapped, almost cornered. But the warmth from her body and the warmth of this affection melted his fears, melted his hesitation. Slowly, he slipped his hand around her back, and held her, his eyes closing and his lips playing a smile across his face. Her scent was intoxicating, her silky hair brushed against his chin. He held her close, almost as if he would lose her. Lose the moment.

Kagome looked up. Sesshomaru looked down. A million things he hadn't felt before – feelings – coursed through his body. Everything he had held within himself and chose to ignore was beginning to surface, beginning to take hold. Pain from his childhood mixed in with it too. He could no longer fight it. He could only let it drown him. No, he would not fight it any longer. He would only accept it.

He bent down and kissed her.

The action was so swift and so unplanned, yet it felt so right, it felt like this is what he was supposed to do all along.

Kagome kissed him back.

Her lips were soft; her scent enveloped him like the warmth of the moment. Everything slipped away from underneath him. Only emotions swept through him, again and again, and his lips became more fervent, urgent, demanding. He held her close to him. She was what mattered. Nothing else. Nothing else any longer. He knew then, and he accepted it. He had saved her not because his was obligated to do so, but because he loved her.

Their lips broke apart after what seemed forever.

Kagome looked up at his face, and smiled, her eyes dazzling with tears, a new joy dancing within them.

He looked at her, also smiling slightly, and believed no other such perfection existed in the world.

Kagome wiped away her tears. She was no longer trapped. She no longer had to pretend she was ok. She knew she was okay. She had lost some, but gained everything.

She smiled again.

Perhaps she was a fool to love either of them.

One left her, and one found her.

But at least, now, she would never be alone.

The End

---

Well, its finished. After about two months of working on this. I'm honestly, proud of myself. Not only did I finish, but I think it turned out great. Sorry if the end was a little cheesy. It had to be, you know :)

Anyways, I hope you enjoyed it. Not to bug you all again, but please review! I'd love you forever if you did.

-Allyson