Disclaimer: I do not own anything HP related. It all belongs to JK Rowling, Bloomsbury Books, Scholastic Inc., Warner Bros., and any other entities involved.
A/N: The sentences in Italics are Harry's memories of his and Draco's life. Nathan, their son, is my own character. This story is now BETAed and I'd like to thank my wonderful beta lupinsmoon12391 for checking it out. ) Please, R&R, it will make me happy!
All of my memories
--
"You can't help who you love. You're not supposed to."
--
Pain. So much pain. His head was burning, he was sure of it. He couldn't see anything. Why couldn't he see? Ah, the trick was to open eyes. Ouch, that hurt, too.
"He's moving! Get the Healer!" A female voice shouted excitedly and then someone squeezed his hand. "Don't fall asleep, Harry; please don't."
I'm not going to, he thought, his eyes hurting now as well. For a moment, he was blinded by white light and everything was blurry. The person above him came into focus. Hermione was smiling, through tears, down at him. "Welcome back, Harry," she whispered, pressing the back of her hand to her mouth.
Harry blinked and then there was another figure next to the bushy-haired woman. Red hair, freckles, long nose. It looked like Ron. He was grinning, relief evident on his face. "What took you so long, mate? You got us worried." He looked close to tears.
"W…water." Harry barely recognized his voice. It was hoarse and his throat hurt. Hermione brought a glass, pressing it against his lips. He drank, almost choking on it.
"Shh, it's ok." Hermione shoved his hair from his forehead, like a mother would.
"What happened?" Harry asked, taking in his surroundings. It seemed that he was in St. Mungo's. Bugger.
Ron and Hermione exchanged meaningful glances. "What's the last thing you remember?"
However, Harry wasn't paying attention to them anymore. His eyes were focused on a blond running towards them. He looked pale and there were dark circles under his gray eyes. His face was pinched with worry.
"When did you wake up? I just went out for a coffee!" He exclaimed, giving Harry a weary smile. "How are you, love?"
Harry's eyebrows furrowed and he turned to look at his friends. "What the fuck is Malfoy doing here?" He demanded. "Why is he calling me 'love'?"
Malfoy's face fell, Ron cringed and Hermione gasped. Harry's heart began to race. What was going on? Did he miss out on something? He waited for someone to give him a straight answer.
"Harry, mate, Draco…" Ron started vaguely, shifting his gaze.
"Why… Why are you calling him 'Draco'? Would someone care to explain?" Harry wanted to shout, but found that he was too weak to do so.
Malfoy turned on his heel and left the room, and Harry could've sworn that he saw the tears in the blonde man's eyes.
--
"There is no loyalty, and the first person who taught me that was you" Harry murmured, snuggling closer to Draco.
"I figure I was trying to sleep with you at the time." Draco chuckled, looping his fingers through Harry's.
Harry smiled into his lover's shoulder. "Well, it worked."
--
Harry's eyes flew open, his breath hitching. He looked around; it was only a dream. Was it? a voice in his head questioned. Oh, shut up, Harry thought, his stomach lurching slightly.
He had found out that day that it was year 2007 and that he had been in a coma for almost 2 months. The Healer had said that he had amnesia, which would, with time, disappear. Ron and Hermione had told him that he was an Auror, the best in the Ministry, and that he had been hit with an unknown hex while working. It had messed with his memories and now he couldn't remember the last seven years of his life. He remembered applying for the Auror training and from that point, nothing else.
He had asked about Malfoy. We've been married, mused Harry, for five years. They had started going out almost seven years ago and, Hermione had said, Harry had never been happier. What brought them more joy had been their son, Nathan, in 2004. The Man-Who-Lived couldn't believe that he was a father. That he had a child, with Draco Malfoy. That he had no memories of these events.
Harry sighed, tracing an old scar on his arm. He couldn't remember getting it. There were so many things he knew nothing about. He could feel tears welling up in his eyes.
"Harry? Love?" Draco approached his bed uncertainly. He must have slept in the chair. The blonde reached out tentatively, swallowing heavily.
Harry leaned into the touch, needing some comfort. The fingers moved gently over his face. Potter looked up to find Draco watching him carefully, lost in thought. For the first time that day, Harry wondered how the other man felt. He had a child to think of and a husband who couldn't remember ever getting together with him. "It hurts, doesn't it?" Did he say that aloud?
"What, love?" Draco murmured, lowering himself on Harry's bed.
"All of this."
"It's just… hard. But it will get better."
"I'm sorry."
"For what?"
"Not remembering."
"Don't be."
It was enough to reassure Harry. He fell asleep in a matter of seconds.
--
"Will you bring him?"
Draco removed his reading glasses, his eyes locking with Harry's. "I mean, you don't have to, but…" Harry babbled, making Draco smirk.
"Nathan will be delighted to see you. He's been asking for you." The blond got up gracefully, placing the book he had been reading on the night-desk.
"I can't even remember my own son, Draco." Harry choked on his words, tears sliding down his cheeks. "I fucking hate this! GOD!"
Draco embraced him tightly and Harry sobbed into his chest. It seemed to go on for forever, but none of them seemed to mind.
--
"What do you want from me? My soul?" cried Harry, aware that everything in their apartment was shaking. A picture fell to the floor, glass breaking into million pieces.
"Why not? I deserve that much!" Draco yelled, his eyes flashing with anger.
--
"Harry, you look fine. Don't worry." Hermione ruffled his hair, grinning.
"What if he…"
"He adores you, mate. You're his hero," Ron added, making his point.
The door of Harry's room opened and Draco walked in, a small boy hiding behind him. Draco turned to look at him. "Why are you standing there? Go to Daddy."
Nathan raised his small head and ran as fast as his short legs could carry him, into Harry's arms. Harry picked him up, closing his eyes as he held his son. Ron and Hermione muttered something and exited the room.
Harry sat down on his bed, Nathan in his lap. The boy looked like a perfect mix of Harry and Draco. His hair was dark blonde and messy, he had green eyes and Draco's nose. He blinked at Harry. "Daddy, when are you going to come home?" he asked, pulling on Harry's hair.
"Very soon."
"How soon?"
Harry hugged him again and felt Nathan's small hands on his back. "Soon, love," he murmured in the blond locks.
The dark-haired man saw Draco slumped against the wall, hands covering his beautiful face. Harry got up and, carrying Nathan, walked out of the room. He found Ron and Hermione in front, talking in hushed tones.
"Hey, guys, could you take him for a walk? I… I need to speak to Draco."
Ron nodded as Hermione took Nathan in her arms. Harry watched the trio walk down the hall before returning to his room.
He found his… husband in the same position, his body shaking. Harry put his finger under Draco's chin, tipping his head. The blond's eyes were red and swollen.
"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to…" His voice was thick with emotion.
"Don't be ridiculous. I get it."
Harry traced Draco's lips with his thumb, his cheekbones and neck. Draco gazed at him through half-lidded eyes, his breath quickening. He sucked Harry's finger in his mouth, making Harry moan. It felt unbelievably good. Potter leaned his forehead against Draco's.
"I'm not sure if we should do this."
"Why not?"
"You don't even remember…"
"I remember being gay, Draco."
"I meant that you don't remember us, Harry."
Harry closed his eyes, breathing in Draco's familiar scent. "How come you fell in love with me?"
Draco's lips curled into a smile. "Someone once told me that you can't help who you love. That you're not supposed to."
"Smart chap, that one."
"Hmm, yes, we still have to prove that…"
"Oh, fuck you."
"Gladly."
"Bastard."
"Yours."
"You better be."
Draco gave him a dazzling smile, a smile that Harry had seen before. From that moment, he knew that everything would turn out to be just fine.
--
"I love you. You… you complete me. And I just…" Harry stuttered, fumbling for words in his mind.
Draco kissed him on his lips, hard. "Shut up, just shut up. You had me at 'hello'."
--
"Well, Mr. Potter, I have to say that you are all well. You may go home." The Healer patted him on his back and left the room.
Draco flung himself at Harry, sending them toppling to the floor. "Wow, easy there." Harry laughed under Draco's assault.
"When we get home, I'll show you all of our pictures. When you see them, you'll certainly remember everything." Draco talked excitedly. "I'll cook you a proper meal, you've lost weight. You can go flying and we'll take Nathan for a walk…"
Harry kept staring at him, a small smile on his full lips. After a few moments, Draco noticed that his husband wasn't even listening to him. "Why are you staring at me like that?"
"I just realized how much I love you."
Draco's eyes went wide. "Harry…"
"I love you. I love you."
Harry leaned forward and kissed the blonde man. Draco moaned, his arms going around Harry's neck. Draco buried his face into Harry's neck, tears of joy pooling down his face. Harry kept repeating 'loveyouloveyouloveyou', holding Draco close the whole time.
--
Harry looked up at him with adoration in his eyes. "Take love, multiply it by infinity and take it to the depths of forever… and you still have only a glimpse of how I feel for you," he whispered, cupping Draco's face.
The blonde man drew him into a kiss. "Marry me."
--
"Hey, 'Mione, Harry and Draco sent us a letter. From France!" shouted Ron as he walked into his and Hermione's apartment.
His wife appeared from the kitchen and pecked him on the lips. "Well, what does it say?"
Ron ripped open the envelope and started reading.
"Dear Ron and 'Mione,
Draco, Nathan and I are enjoying our family time here, in Province. It's really beautiful, Draco says that you should come and visit sometime. It would be brilliant, all of us together, like old times!
It will please you to hear that all of my memories came flooding back, the other night. I woke up and everything was back. It still feels a bit strange, but it's better than not remembering at all. I can't wait to come home and talk to you properly.
We've celebrated Nathan's 4th birthday and thank you so much for the gifts, they were wonderful! Draco was so proud when Nathan picked up your book, 'Mione, rather than Ron's toy (sorry mate, seems that he's a geek like our better halves).
Also, I can't believe it, but… I'm going to be Dad once again! Draco is pregnant, damn me if I knew how, but we've never been happier. This time, we're going to ask Remus to be the baby's Godfather. We still don't know if it's a girl or a boy. Oh God, I can't tell you how happy I am!
I've got to go now we're going out for a ride and a picnic. Hope the two of you are well and I'll talk to you soon! Draco and Nathan say 'hello'.
Love, Harry"
"Well, Merlin's beard, Ferret is expecting!" Ron grinned, laying the letter on the table.
Hermione was gnawing the middle of her lip, which made Ron frown. "Honey? You ok?"
"I'm fine, just… How do you feel about children?"
"I guess I'd like one or two, but not seven, like my mum."
The bushy-haired witch approached him and took his larger hand in hers. She pressed it against her stomach. Ron's eyes went wide. Hermione nodded, smile dancing on her lips.
Ron pulled her into a hug, laughing happily. "I love you."
"I love you too." Hermione chuckled at her husband's expression.
--
Draco cocked his head, watching his husband close his eyes and sigh. They were lying on a beach and the sun was setting, bathing the sea in magnificent colours
"Harry?"
"Yes, love?"
"Do you think that our love can create miracles?"
For a moment, Harry said nothing. Draco scooted forward and leaned his head against Harry's shoulder.
"I do." It was barely above a whisper, but it made Draco smile.
They sat on the beach for a long time, their hairs fluttering in summer breeze and thought about their future. They knew that no matter what happened, they'll be there for each other. For better or for worse, until the end of time.
The End
Quotes:
1." You can't help who you love. You're not supposed to." -One Tree Hill
2." There is no loyalty, and the first person who taught me that was you."
"I figure I was trying to sleep with you at the time."
"Well, it worked."- Jerry Maguire
3. "What do you want from me? My soul?"
"Why not? I deserve that much!"-Jerry Maguire
4."I love you. You… you complete me. And I just…"
"Shut up, just shut up. You had me at 'hello'."- Jerry Maguire
5."Take love, multiply it by infinity and take it to the depths of forever… and you still have only a glimpse of how I feel for you."- Meet Joe Black
6."Do you think that our love can create miracles?"
"I do."-The Notebook