Disclaimer.

Welcome to the long-awaited sixth part of the Idiot Seraphim series! Idiot Seraphim Zes! Most likely it will also be the last. (I mean it this time!) Let's disclaim, shall we?

First off, I don't own Tales of Symphonia, or the characters. This counts for all chapters to come.

Secondly, this story is a bit alternate universed, since it diverts from the original ending. If you want more insight on how it diverts, read the previous Idiot seraphim fics.

Thirdly, I suppose the characters are out of character. A lot. This is normal in the Idiot Seraphim series. There are some who find my view of characters refreshing. Others yell at me for it. But don't worry. I'll try to keep your image of them intact.

Fourthly, this fic supports the couplings of KratosxYuan, LloydxZelos and MithosxGenis. Also, implied SheenaxRaine. Also, a new pairing that I won't spoil just yet. If you can't stand the couplings, please don't whine about it. This story was written for the sake of comedy and fangirling.

Fifthly, it doesn't cost you that much time to leave a review. So please, remember to comment on the chapter. It doesn't matter if it's good or bad. I like constructive criticism.

For those of you who have not yet read the previous Idiot Seraphim fics, or Idiot Renegade, catch up to all the events by reading this wonderful prologue!

It all started off when the guys of Cruxis hired Zelos to be the fourth seraphim. Zelos agreed, and was dragged off to Vinheim the second, where he could live from now on. After a rowdy party at Lloyd's place, Zelos awoke next to the birthday boy. The guys from Cruxis of course, knew all along he was gay. Zelos still denied it, and tried to find distraction in Cruxis' radical actions against discrimination. When he faced certain death however, he admitted that he is in fact gay. Later on, when everyone was celebrating Mithos' four thousand and thirteenth birthday in Flanoir, he admitted to Lloyd that he may have feelings for him.

And so, two years later, Zelos proposed to him. Lloyd accepted. But then the boy went missing. Zelos, Kratos, Yuan and Mithos embarked on a quest to find him. After being dragged around the entire united world, they found out that Lloyd had been kidnapped by none other than Colette Brunel. The girl wanted revenge, because Lloyd had used the Kharlan tree to start his Mana company. The company that supplies mana throughout the world, without exhausting the tree too much. Colette demanded half of the company, but Lloyd refused to budge. Eventually, the gang managed to free him and the wedding happened as planned.

A year later, Mithos succeeded in reviving Martel, using an automated doll similar to Tabatha. Martel was not pleased to find out Yuan and Kratos were a couple now, and tried her best to keep the two apart. Meanwhile, she also frowned heavily upon the relationship between Mithos and Genis Sage. Everyone was soon on the brink of insanity, which only got worse when Martel accidentally exposed herself as an angel while saving Altamira from a tidal wave. Soon, it was time for another one of Mithos' birthday parties, where everyone has to come in couples. Just as Martel forced Yuan to tell everyone they were getting married soon, Colette came to crash the party. Martel came to the shocking conclusion that she too was gay, and that she only liked Yuan because he was so girly. She soon ditched the party and ran off with Colette. But she still had to live with her little brother, of course. That's how all seven seraphim ended up together in Vinheim the second.

A few months afterwards, the Cruxis gang got a rather strange visitor. A man named Dhaos claimed to be Yuan from the future. His mission in the past was to take Kratos with him and at the same time kill Kratos' future assassin. The assassin turned out to be none other than Zelos, who, four thousand years from now, would accidentally feed Kratos spaghetti with tomato sauce. Luckily, most of the group jumped in to protect their favourite ex-chosen from Dhaos' wrath. Yuan remained sceptic about Dhaos' story, even though everyone said that the two 'kinda did look alike'. Martel, getting sick of the situation, decided to go on a short holiday with Colette, vowing not to return until Dhaos was gone. There was much rejoicing. Still, everyone was starting to get more and more annoyed by the man. The entire situation was resolved when Nancy, Kratos from the future, came to retrieve his beloved Dhaos. He'd been revived with a lifebottle mere moments after Dhaos left for the past. Still, the two left chaos in their wake, as everyone of Cruxis was now incredibly scared of the future.

Six months later, it was revealed that Botta was still alive. Along with the two Renegades that accompanied him, he had escaped the Remote island human ranch. He then spent a few years searching for his true purpose in life, only to return to Triet base. After warning Yuan and Kratos about an evil organisation that was planning to take over the world, he disappeared once more. With the aid of Mizuho's inside network, they found out that this organisation was called Sixurc, and was comprised of ten so-called Eliminators. During a show-down in the Tower of Mana (which was repainted and dubbed the Tower of Damnation) the identities of the Eliminators were revealed. Kuchinawa, Virginia, the Iselia mayor, Chocolat, Ernie the hotsprings guy, the Pope and Abyssion were the most random ones. Forcystus was also in their ranks, but only because he was the Renegade and Mizuho insider. The main Eliminators turned out to be none other than the Dark Chef and his henchman Remiel. The Dark Chef planned on destroying the Tower of Damnation and everyone inside it, fulfilling an ancient prophecy to find his true heir, who would arise from the rubble to shower the world in darkness. Luckily, his plan was foiled when Wonder Chef showed up to save the day. Along with his most trusted henchmen, the Dark Chef fled the scene. Virginia, however was returned to a semi-sane state with a whack on the head from Raine's staff. What kind of trouble will the guys get themselves into this time?