I know it's been long, I know tis are short. But bear with me. I'm working on the next one. I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaacckkk!!!!!
Raito stayed up feeling crummy. Yes, crummy. He grumbled, moaned and half screamed himself to death. All of which was done inside his head of course. He vaguely remembered a class in psychology he took online that reminded him that not letting these feelings out was dangerous.
It must be true if my vocabulary and normal syntax is getting this trivial. Gakt, I'm becoming completely one dimensional!! This cannot be love!!! But I still feel the same!!! NO. Why wasn't anything simple? Why am I doing these mistakes?
On and on went the conversation until his tired brain just wanted to shut down for some much needed sleep. Unlike the side which he showed L (against his better judgment) this side was the illogical part of him. Or the most analogical, as there was no such thing as no logic in a creature as complex as him. He rubbed his eyelids quietly, kneading the skin surrounding his eyes. This was too much. Why did he break down last night? Was it anger? Or was it just the fact that seeing L that weak, seeing him that vulnerable and yet still having the strength to ignore his efforts too much? He admittedly broke down. That wasn't how he wanted to tell him the truth. That wasn't what he wanted to do.
He smothered the urge to bang his head against the table. For someone with so much brains, how could he be so stupid!!!! He sighed, letting his eyes close shut. He was pretty sure the still form beside him was sleeping. The steady breathing was proof of that. Even though he needed sleep, he realized that he couldn't let his brain shut down just yet. The stress and the growing insomnia that was expanding ever since he came here was worrying. He never needed a lot of sleep even though he valued it. His current life didn't need that much psychical energy. Unlike school where he had to run between classes, avoid certain people and walk to everywhere; he hadn't need that much sleep then.
Right now, where his daily schedule only consisted of sleeping, working at a computer, and letting his muscles atrophy until another argument broke the ice. He squirmed. He couldn't lie and say he hated it. Truthfully he felt exhilarated when something like this happened. Although there were spaces where he could not or will not remember but it didn't matter. Those times went unnoticeable after all. He must have just shut down or something after all that stress. He sighed again, adding more pressure to his temples. Unconsciously a finger went to his lips. He still could feel the warmth and softness imprinting on his lips. He could just imagine the sweet petals pressed against his again. He could remember that glorious safety and comfort that seemed to wrap around him, squeezing all coldness from his soul. Although it wasn't his first kiss, it was the first kiss he had with a person he was sure he loved. It was, in reality, in memory, and his heart, the first most fragile and sweetest kiss he had ever given. He could understand why people waited to get intimate. He could understand then that he wanted the same from L. From his L. No longer Ryuuzaki, no longer a false name, but the first and closest name he had of the person he was sure he loved. The person that could think as clearly as him, that was fiery and manipulative. Through all the horrors that man had been through, through all the hate and fear and discrimination that was imprinted into his soul, the naivety and innocence he had seen would be forever in his spirit.
Maybe his heart wasn't so cold after all.
-Hello people
Lynx/ cynical L/ sarcastic bastard/ sadistic genius/- yes, good evening my pretties
Klasv/ gothlolijen/ idiot savant/ creative linguistic genius/ sugar junkie/- HELOO!!!!!!! WE ARE BACK!!! AND STRONGER THEN EVER!!!
Lynx/ laughs evilly (yes, I am a sarcastic bastard and genius. If PEOPLE would listen to me then things would be a different story though!!!) But aside from that, enjoy that people. That mushy goodness that you fangirls and crack addicts enjoy
Klasv/ swats Lynx on head you're a mean one. (And I have more names and a longer genius category then you anyways : P) okay, enjoy people. But understand, this young writer here isn't as good as people tell her. She's soooo insecure rolls eyes Feedback people. Its called feedback!!!!
- Hey, I resent that. Will you both stop arguing!!! I do not want to listen to any more arguments about your names. These are yours, live with it dammit. And I'm NOT INSECURE!!!!!!!!!!! I just am not sure that my writing is any good yet. I'm working on it aren't I?
Lynx/ Yes, you're insecure, and anyways (atleastidon'thaveidiotandsugarjunkieasmynames……..) pokes klasv Well, goodnight people. Its late and parental guidance won't be happy.
Klasv/ Oyasuminasai mina!!!!
-GOOD NIGHT. FAREWELL. SLEEEEEEEEEEEEEPPPPPPPP
k.i. klasv
Hello people. Surprise. I'm awake!!! And that's only because I couldn't sleep. At all. I power napped. And if anyone asks why I look like someone punched me in the eyes, just answer that my father is a panda. (he growls enough to be one) soo……..enjoy this little drabble thingy. I wanted to put both of them together. Ignore this rant if you find it disrupts the 'mood'. LOL!!! Enjoy people, this is pretty plotless but character development. Oooh how I love characters development. I suppose I might have to say farewell to those who wanted something darker. I will do it, but not yet. Not while plot bunnies are humping in my brain. Oh well .
L threaded carefully, stepping quietly over the bare carpet of their shared bedroom. His brain barely registered the sleeping from beside him. His bare feet made their way to the door, before he turned around and settled his eyes on Raito. A sigh escaped his lips, memories barely registering in his head. It was easy to not sleep. He didn't need that much sleep to keep his mind working after all. Just sugar and some stimulation would help. Guilt works too, he mused miserably. It was the first time he had met someone as complex. As equal, his subconscious reminded him.
Raito was perfect.
Raito was handsome.
Raito was complex. Caring. Jealous.
Brash. Impulsive. Emotional. Everything he was not. Everything that he had never had a chance to be. Everything he had wanted, at one time or another to be able to express. But he could not.
He shook his head, the unruly bangs falling into his face. Breathing deeply, he walked in his usual slouchy mechanical manner to their workstation. Or their isle, as he liked to call it in his head. (Try getting him to admit that) I wonder when that infernal meddlesome genius that rival own will come and work here together, he mused. He shook his head, resisting the urge to slam his head against a wall. He DID not just refer to Raito affectionately. Did he? Unconsciously his body led him to a chair, where his perched style reminded him of his currently situation. This was going to be very difficult. His finger made their way to his lips, his thumb sitting gently between his teeth. He did not notice the blood trickling down the inside of his palm until a sharp familiar tingle alerted him from his reverie. His mind was practically ticking over. If someone had knocked they would most probably see and hear the mechanics whirring and exerting as much effort as a sugar induced haze could administer. Speaking of which, he was running low on sugar actually. The usual craving ignited in the pit of his bottomless cavern of sugary addiction. Raito's words actually. A smile escaped his lips, the thoughts he had relaxing into a gentle humming behind his daily mask worn to function in a community based society. He was not a social person. So why was it so easy to talk to Raito? How was it that he could admit confessions that had never seen the light outside his head to Yagami-kun? How was it that someone so brash, so hormonally ruled, so impulsive, could understand him so much? Could it be that there were people apart from Watari that could listen to his rants, to his secrets, fears, and still not run away? Surely they wanted to escape him? No one could understand his uniqueness. His mind. He had battled every disorder from asperger's syndrome, autism and savant syndrome to his physical diseases.
He had been poked, prodded, experimented on and goggled at ever since he was a child because of his mind. People scare easily when someone so young surpassed all their capabilities. They felt threatened. And in turn, unknown or consciously they threatened him instead. He pulled away from society. Possibly forming his asperger's syndrome then. He had no choice. His spacing out and adverse reaction to sugar withdrawal scared people. His parents, the foster system, people. He suspected that he had epilepsy, it explained so much. But no one believed him. It wasn't until someone caved in and scanned his brain that they realized he really was sick. Didn't help that no one wanted to save him then. If not for Watari………
He shook his head, squaring his shoulders. He knew what he wanted to do know. All he needed was to prove that Raito was Kira. That would be the first step. Now he would take sugar. And think. A lot. His feet padded softly to the fridge, his fingers flexing quickly. He needed a keyboard. He needed to write this down. But first came first. Sugar. He smiled as a generous helping of strawberries dotted Swiss whipped cream, dusted with sugar and mint leaves. Perfect. As close to perfection as he would ever get. The dainty metal spoon that Watari insisted on serving it with made its way to his mouth. His lips encased the sugar filled treat, all value of health gone once it touched his tongue. His mind wandered happily around all facts and ignorance. He was ready. A rustle drew him out of his ecstasy, footsteps echoing one and the other. He allowed him a small smile. Now, for the games to start. He was jumping off the cliff, and falling into a crevice that could lead him to his downfall. But he didn't care. It was time for the truth.
k.i. klasv
Lynx/ Both of the idiots are sleeping now. They fell asleep on the computer table. Again. Seriously, why do they feel so exhausted after writing? Then again, all I do is poke holes in the plot and make fun of their characters. I am the logical side after all. Anyways. Review. Leave a comment. Rant. Anything and everything you'd like to do. Send hate mail, flames, anything you wish. I enjoy flames it gives me a chance to poke fun at reviewers and boost the other's confidence. I am stuck with them after all. Not that anythings wrong with that….. nope…..i'm fine. Perfectly.