Shampoo147: NOt much has changed, but i changed the format.

Ayame: We don't own the Harry Potter world, characters, or the song.

Whisper

I curled into himself atop the Astronomy Tower, arms wrapped tight around me and knees tucked under my chin.

Tears were falling down my cheeks and my eyes, I knew, showed a broken soul, but I made no sound.

There was a mocking whisper of warmth that I could see, but could never touch. I heard my godfather laughing behind the whisper of the winds, but he was never here.

He never protected meI fruitlessly called out to his godfather, to anyone.

I was calling to empty air and I curled tighter, knowing that I would repeat his actions, to never be answered.

No one was ever there to answer my small please and calls.

I was losing it, I know that. I kept calling and expected a warm answer, but knew otherwise.

I flinched as he felt more blood spill out of my violated rectum. I had begun to rock back and forth, I should know better.

It happened all the time.

The shattered pieces of my mind were never tended to.

It hurt.

It always hurt.

I heard footsteps and shifted to see who it was. I moved out of my comforting shadow.

I knew already though, but I had to look.

I wanted to hide in the shadows, calling me to return, but ignored them.

I wouldn't give him the satisfaction.

If I closed my eyes to prepare, I would only be shattered even more.

Every time I closed his eyes, I saw him. I saw him at climax, digging deeper into my injured rectum and releasing his seed.

Making the blood pink from the semen.

Sleeping was worse.

He walked in, those black robes, which haunted my sleep, billowing behind him.

His steely ebony eyes locked with mine and he sniffed.

I tensed, not knowing what he was going to do.

He stalked towards me and sneered, "Pathetic, Potter. One would think that you would be used to being my whore."

His eyes glittered in savage amusement.

My tears flowed more freely.

My pain, I knew, shined in my eyes, as his eyes shined in malicious glee.

I held his gaze, trying to be stronger than I am.

The shadows were cooing once more.

He sneered and let his emotions at seeing me like this glow in his eyes.

I finally looked away from the glee and smugness.

I kept my eyes open and stared at his waist.

I saw that very waist straddle me and pin my legs uselessly to the side.

I was no longer safe keeping my eyes open when I look at him.

I turned away and felt him sneer.

I saw the bodies of my friends at the base of the tower.

That's what made it so horrible.

He had fucked me right after I had killed Voldemort and I heard my friends through it all.

He had killed them himself and had made me watch.

As if me being his personal whore wasn't enough.

He's coming beside me. I wonder if he's going to push me?

Was he finally going to end it all?

I now saw Hermione and she was trying to reach me.

It disappeared.

Should I jump?

Dumbledore always said that death was merely another adventure.

Would I finally have an adventure I liked?

Would I be with my friends?

Snape pushed me.

"Try to join your pathetic lapdogs, Potter"

I hate the 'try' part.

I saw Hermione and my family, Ron, the Weasleys, my parents, Remus and Sirius, all holding out their hands to take me, blissful happiness upon their faces.

Their expressions turned to pure rage when I was pulled back and I woke to see Madame Pomphrey fussing.

Snape was smirking at me in a corner.

I felt tears build in my eyes. When Madame Pomphrey left, I had to ask him the question.

"Why? Why do you do this? I loved you and you said you loved me. Is this your love? " I gave you my heart, I gave you my soul, and this is your love for me?

His face twisted, and I saw a flicker, brief enough for love to overshadow my hate, "Pathetic Potter, you're nothing more than my whore."

I cried, for what could I do? I loved the man, I love him and he holds my heart and my soul in his hand.

And he hates my father and desires my body.

There is no rest for the wicked.

Catch me as I fall
Say you're here and it's all over now
Speaking to the atmosphere
No one's here and I fall into myself
This truth drives me into madness
I know I can stop the pain if I will it all away
If I will it all away

Don't' turn away
(Don't give into the pain)
Don't try to hide
(Though they're screaming your name)
Don't close your eyes
(God knows what lies behind them)
Don't turn out the lights
(Never sleep, never die)

I'm frightened by what I see
But somehow I know that there's much more to come
Immobilized by my fear
And soon to be blinded by tears
I can stop the pain if I will it all away
If I will it all away

Don't turn away
(Don't' give into the pain)
Don't try to hide
(Though they're screaming your name)
Don't close your eyes
(God knows what lies behind them)
Don't turn off the light
(Never sleep, never die)

Fallen angels at my feet
Whispered voices at my ear
Death before my eyes
Lying next to me I fear
She beckons me shall I give in?
Upon my end shall I begin
Forsaking all I've fallen for I rise to meet my end

-"Whisper" by Evanescence