"Admit it, Kakashi, you can never beat me! I am better than you in every way!"

Absently flipping the pages in his book, Kakashi nodded. "You sure are, Gai. In every single way."

"I am!"

"You are."

"I am!"

Kakashi turned and quickly walked away.

"You cannot just walk away from such a worthy opponent! That shows no character!" Gai jogged behind his eternal rival, glowering at the back of Kakashi's head. "Turn around and face me!"

"I'm really busy at the moment, Gai."

"Doing what?"

"...Very important stuff. Look, Gai, I'm sorry, but I'm just way too busy to--"

"Too busy to face your rival?" Gai sniffed, slowing down his jog to a doleful walk. "But... I thought our youthful competition meant something to you!"

Kakashi sighed loudly, stopping in the middle of the street. "Gai," he said slowly, "please, don't do what I think you're going to--"

"I thought our friendship meant something to you!" Gai let out a loud wail, falling on his knees. "I thought--"

"Gai, really." Kakashi turned around exasperatedly. "You're making a scene."

"But our friendship has come to an end!"

"No," the silver-haired man said slowly, tucking away his book, "it hasn't. I never said anything like that. Now can you please get off your knees?"

Gai looked up hopefully. "Only if you will agree to challenge me!"

"...Is there any other way?"

"None!"

Kaksahi sighed. "Then I suppose I have no other option..."

"Finally! I get to prove my worth... again!" Gai jumped up, striking his infamous pose. "I propose to you, Hatake Kakashi... a challenge!"

"We've already established that, Gai."

"But I must say it in the official way."

"Sure, sure. Now seriously, hurry up. I have places to go, people to see... books to read."

Gai smiled deviously. "Of course, my perverted non-youthful friened. My challenge is simple-- we will figure out who is... the better teacher."

"...And we figure this out how?"

"By asking our students, of course! We are to find all of our students, ask them who their favorite teacher is, and then report back at this very spot in two hours!"

Maybe there was hope after all... Kakashi thought his students all liked him well enough.

"But," Gai said sadly, hanging his head low, "since one of your students has left our youthful village, you can only ask two of your students... unless, of course, you have another option?"

"Uh..." Kakashi searched his mental database rapidly. "There's... Sai," he said, thinking of his team's replacement member.

Gai clapped his hands excitedly. "Then it is decided! The competition starts now!" Smiling broadly, he ran swiftly in the opposite direction.

Kakashi stood silently in the middle of the street, tucking his hands in his pockets. Naruto, Sakura, and Sai... what the hell have I gotten myself into?

"LEE!"

"GAI-SENSEI!"

The infamous duo leapt into one another's arms, tears coursing down their cheeks.

"Gai-sensei, I haven't seen you since this morning!"

"I know, Lee! It's been too long!"

After another minute of estactic hugging, Gai cleared his throat. "Now, Lee," he said, pulling away. "There is something very important that I need to discuss with you."

"Anything, sir! I cannot think of a better reason to interrupt my training!"

Gai surveyed his pupil in approvement. "Hm... training even more today, eh?"

"Of course, Gai-sensei! I must strengthen myself!"

"I'm proud of you, Lee! Training while the rest of the team is enjoying their day off!" Gai gave an enthusiatic thumbs-up. "But back to business..."

Lee stood in rapt attention. "I'm listening, Gai-sensei!"

"Kakashi," Gai said menacingly, "has challenged me to another competition--"

"Which you shall obviously win!"

Gai glared down at his student. "Do not interrupt, Lee!"

"Yes, sensei!"

"Where was I... oh yes. Kakashi has challenged me to find out who is... the better teacher."

Lee let out a squeal of excitement.

"And so, student of mine, I must ask... am I the best teacher you have ever had?"

"Oh yes," Lee cried, bursting into tears. "You are the best teacher in the whole village! In the whole country! In the entire world!"

A tear slid down Gai's cheek. "Do you mean it?"

"Of course I do, sensei!"

They leapt towards one another once again, sobbing loudly.

"Lee!"

"Gai-sensei!"

"So... how are things?"

Naruto paused, the chopsticks hanging in the air. "Didn't you just ask me this this morning? You know, at training?"

"Maybe I did." Kakashi akwardly scratched his chin. "So, uh... are things still the same as... this morning?"

"Well, yeah." Naruto happily slurped up his ramen. "I mean, I guess it's better right now than in the morning, because I'm here eating ramen, but... it's still kind of the same."

This definitely wasn't going how Kakashi had hoped it would. "Well, that's good to hear."

"Yep."

Kakashi cleared his throat. "Soo... I was just wondering... I was talking to a friend earlier, and we were talking about the best teachers we ever had. I mean, some people don't have a favorite teacher, but... who's yours?"

"My what?"

"Your favorite teacher."

"Oh." Naruto sat down his chopsticks, frowning in puzzlement. "That's a weird question, but... I'd have to say Iruka, because he buys me ramen every week. But then there's Ero-sennin. I mean, he did teach me Rasengan, and lots of other stuff. So... I guess it's a tie between those two."

"Jiraiya and Iruka, huh? That's it?"

"Well... yeah."

"Any of your other teachers pop to mind? You know, someone who has spent their valuable time to teach you many things... people who help you."

Naruto's face brightened. "Oh yeah! I totally forgot!"

Took him long enough to remember about little ol' me, Kakashi thought sarcastically.

"Yamato's taught me stuff, too! Like... how to... um... anyways, he makes sure I don't get all crazy and stuff, and that counts for something, right?"

"Sure," Kakashi said slowly. "But are there any other teachers? One that you see every single day? One that taught you all the basics about chakra manipulation? One that's helping you out right now with your training?"

Throwing his chopsticks down, Naruto sighed contentedly. "They got the ramen just right today... perfect!" He winked at the girl walking towards him, coming to get his empty bowl. "Thanks, Ayame!"

"Anytime," the girl said happily, gathering up the bowl. "And... hi, Kakashi." She blushed deeply.

"Hey," Kakashi said flatly. "Anyways, Naruto, about the teachers--"

"Yeah, yeah, I know." Naruto grabbed his napkin, daintily wiping his lips. "I didn't forget you or anything, Kakashi. I mean, you are my main teacher."

"I'm flattered, but I didn't mean you had to include me on the list, Nar--"

"I'm not completely stupid," Naruto said happily. "You want me to say you. Well, you're on the list, all right, just not number one. Sorry, Kakashi, but Jiraiya taught me Rasengan, and you taught me how to walk on trees. I mean, is there really any comparison?"

Kakashi coughed. "Well... you can't go anywhere without the basics..."

"Mm-hmm." Naruto's grin suddenly faded. "Look, Kakashi, I appreciate you and all--you did kinda helped me develop my new jutsu, and you are always there for me during the missions--but... you always had your favorite, and I just wasn't him."

Flinching slightly, Kakashi muttered, "I don't know what you're--"

Naruto laughed slightly. "Hey, don't worry about it! Every teacher's got a favorite or two. I'm not holding a grudge or anything against you."

"Well... that's good to know..."

"Yeah." Naruto reached into his pocket and drew out a wad of cash, throwing some of it down on the counter. "Seriously, though, you're a hell of a teacher... I appreciate you teaching me the basics and all. See ya around, Kakashi!" He disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Yeah," Kakashi said weakly, looking at the seat his former student had occupied seconds ago. "See ya around."

"TENTEN!"

Sitting on her bed and polishing her massive kunai collection, Tenten paused. "What the--"

"OUT HERE, TENTEN! I AM UNDER YOUR WINDOW!"

She rolled her eyes. Come on, she thought to herself, sliding off onto the floor. It's my day off!

"TENTEN! WILL YOU HURRY AND COME TO YOUR WINDOW!"

He's probably just coming to get me to train with him and Lee again, she thought, stalking to the window. Or is it another team-building exercise? I mean, we aren't even an official team anymore!

"TENTEN, MAYBE YOU CANNOT HEAR ME--"

She threw open the window. "Gai-sensei!" Tenten said firmly, shading her eyes with her hand as she peered down at her teacher. "In case you forgot, today is my day off, and I really don't want to go training with you and Lee, although I appreciate the offer, and I'd really prefer not to go out on any late-night team-buliding exercises. I'm just--"

"TENTEN! THIS IS NOT ABOUT TRAINING WITH LEE AND I, ALTHOUGH I STILL BELIEVE IT WOULD DO YOU GOOD! THIS IS A WHOLE OTHER MATTER ENTIRELY!"

Tenten blinked. "Oh... well, thank God."

"TENTEN, I HAVE A SERIOUS QUESTION FOR YOU TO ANSWER!"

"Um... okay. And you can stop yelling, you know," Tenten said, leaning against the windowframe. "I can hear you fine if you just talk normally."

Gai nodded, smiling and flashing a thumbs-up her way. "Of course, Tenten."

He stood that way for a while, smile glinting in the bright sunlight. "Uh... Gai-sensei?" Tenten said finally, brow furrowed in puzzlement. "I thought... weren't you were going to ask me something?"

"OF COURSE!" He flashed another thumbs-up at her. "Now... on to my question!"

Oh Lord, Tenten thought miserably.

"Now, you must answer this truthfully!"

What in the world is he going to ask me? Please don't make this be anything embarrassing...

"Tenten, WHO..."

Did I just see my neighbor's head sticking out of a window? Damn it, I did! Please, Gai, don't ask me anything stupid... nothing that will make the the laughing stock of the neighborhood...

"...do you believe..."

Oh Jesus...

"IS THE BEST TEACHER OF ALL TIME?!"

Tenten, who had been squeezing her eyes closed in fear of embarrassment, threw them open. "Say what?"

"WHO IS THE BEST TEACHER OF ALL TIME?"

"That's all you want to know?"

"YES!"

"Nothing... stupid, or embarrassing?"

"NO! DO I EVER ASK STUPID QUESTIONS?"

"Do you really... want me to answer that?"

"...JUST ANSWER MY ORIGINAL QUESTION!"

Tenten glanced over at her neigbor's house again, seeing not one but two heads sticking out now. Now they were pointing... and... was one of them laughing?

"HURRY UP AND ANSWER, OR ELSE THERE WILL BE FOUR HUNDRED LAPS AROUND THE VILLAGE FOR YOU TO RUN TOMORROW!"

"O-okay!" Tenten squeaked, cheeks getting red as her neighbors' giggles floated towards her. "You are! You're the best teacher!"

Gai blushed slightly. "Aw, you really think so?"

"YES! NOW, CAN I PLEASE GO BACK IN?"

Gai frowned up at her. "No need to yell, Tenten. I'm standing right here."

He watched as Tenten yanked her head back inside, muttering something.

"What was that, Tenten? It sounded like a particularly unyouthful string of curses."

The window slammed shut.

"Good-bye to you too, Tenten! Have a most wonderful day!"

So, Kakashi thought, trudging down the street. Guess I learned something new today... I mean, who knew the kid thought about me like that?

It kind of hurt, actually.

Maybe he should just give up on this whole stupid competition thing after all. Maybe he should just let Gai win... it'd keep him off his back for a while.

But then again...

If one student thought of him like that, who knew what the other one thought? She could be secretly harboring a dark hatred, for all he knew.

Sai, however, didn't really matter, because... well, Kakashi wasn't even his teacher.

But, against all his better judgements, he just had to find out what Sakura thought.

"Hatake Kakashi." Tsunade made a temple with her hands, looking at the man standing before her over top of them. "I can only imagine what you're here for."

"It's lovely to see you, too," Kakashi said, grinning cheekily beneath the mask.

"I'm sure." She studied him for a moment longer, then sighed tiredly. "Look, if you want another mission for you and your former team, I've already--"

"It's nothing like that," he quickly assured her, holding up his hands defensively. "Naruto still wants to train before our next one, so... I just wanted to know where Sakura was hiding at this time of day."

"Oh?"

He fidgeted uncomfortably under her watchful gaze. "Well... I just had to ask her a question or two... it wouldn't take long."

"Questions? About what, exactly?" She leaned forward, suddenly interested.

"You know... this and that." He notcied the sudden disapproving glint in her eyes. "It's nothing bad, I promise, and like I said... it won't take long."

"It'd better not," Tsunade said contritely. "Now, I probably shouldn't be telling you this--we don't want these little question-and-answer visits to become sort of a hobby-- but if you really want to find her, I suggest you go look at the hospital. She's been working there lately, seeing as how severely understaffed it is."

"Uh, thanks a--"

"--She's likely to be extremely ill if you interrupt her work for some trivial chit-chat, so, like I said, it's better be important," she continued. "You know how absolutely dedicated to her work she is."

"Yeah... she's something, that girl."

"Mmm-hmm."

"So... I'll just leave, then. See you around, Tsunade-sama." He turned, walking to the door.

"Sure," she said, watching him walk away.

The door slammed shut behind him.

Tsunade quickly kicked underneath the desk. "Get out of there," she whispered angrily. "I can't believe you actually had the nerve to feel up my leg while he was in here... I told you had permission to hide under there, not to grope me!"

"Sorry," Jiraiya mumbled, crawling out on all fours. "I'm a man, Tsunade, and I've got these primal urges--"

"Shut up," she said vehemently. "And you'd better not have drunk all the sake."

"Are you serious? I mean, all I have to do is ask her one question!"

"Standard hospital procedure, sir," the nurse replied calmly, smacking her gum. "If you want so much as a second with Sakura-san, I'd suggest you sit down in the waiting room until your name is called."

"This is absurd!"

"Take it up with the head of the hospital," the nurse said snappily. "Next!"

Kakashi shook his head. "I'm not moving until you--"

"Do you see the line behind you? These people are trying to see Sakura-san for legitimate medical concerns, not just because they want to ask her some stupid question. Now, in my opinion--and I'm sure everyone else's in here, as well--medical emergencies far outweigh your little whimsies. Go sit down before I call security on you."

"But--"

"NEXT!"

Kakashi turned and angrily stalked to the waiting room, dropping down into the nearest empty chair. This is the reason I never go to the hospital, he thought wearily.

Looking around the waiting room and noticing the extremely high number of people surrounding him, he sighed.

"Time for some reading," he muttered under his breath, withdrawing his little orange book.

What else was he supposed to do?

"Well, well, well... what have we got here?"

Kakashi looked over the pages of his book. "Hey there, Sakura."

His former student grinned down at him. "I knew when I got all those complaints that it just had to be you!"

He raised an eyebrow. "Complaints? About lil' ol' me?"

"We've received about four in one hour alone," she said, grin turning wicked. "Something about a silver-haired pervert reading some highly objectionable material in our waiting room... and scarring the poor, innocent little children."

He flipped over the book, staring at the cover. "What's so objectionable about this?" he muttered, staring down at the half-clothed busty blonde embellished upon the bright orange surface.

"Everything," she said flatly. "And while it's good to see you again, I am once again forced to question your taste in fine literature."

"This one's a classic, for sure," he said lightly, standing and tucking it into his pocket.

"Pfft." She crossed her arms. "Anyways, Kakashi... why are you here? You hate this place."

"Not when a little ray of sunshine like you works here."

Sakura rolled her eyes. "The nurse up front said something about a question."

"The gum-smacking one? She's a gem, that one."

"Well, the hospital can't exactly be picky about who they hire, seeing as how understaffed we currently are, and--"

"Tsunade informed me," he said hurriedly. "So let's just move along to my question, shall we?"

"Mm-hmm."

"You see, Gai challenged me again this morning, and... don't give me that look, I had to accept it. Gentlemen don't turn down challenges, and yes, I am a gentlemen, so you can stop rolling your eyes. Anyways, the challenge was to see who our students thought was their best teacher, and so I immediately thought to ask you. You are by far my brightest, most favorite student, and so--"

"You asked Naruto and he didn't say you, did he?"

Kakashi winced. "You're so... blunt."

"It's one of my finer traits," she said airily. "So I was right... you asked him, he said another teacher--Iruka, probably--and so you come crawling to me, asking for my opinion. And you throw in a bunch of useless flattery to ensure I say you."

"...Basically. Like I said, you are the bright one!"

Sakura cocked an eyebrow. "I'm sure."

Damn, Kakashi thought, fidgiting under her gaze. She's looking at me exactly like Tsunade was.

"I suppose," she said slowly, "that, although you want me to say you, I have to be honest..."

He slouched slightly.

"You see, Kakashi, the thing is that... I mean, you were a great teacher," she said hurriedly, throwing up her hands defensively. "But... when it came to me and Naruto--me, especially--you just weren't always... there. You showed us the basics, and congratulated us when we succeeded, but no matter how much we tried... we were never Sasuke.

"You were still always there for us on the missions, and you gave us advice when we needed it, and I appreciate it." She smiled gently up at him. "In your own right, you were a wonderful teacher. But, being completely honest, my favorite teacher... it just isn't you."

Kakashi slouched down even more. "So where am I, exactly? I mean, on your list of greatest-ever teachers."

"Number two," she said. "Just after Tsunade. Stop looking so down about it, Kakashi. You'll still always be my sensei, my team leader. And you're one of the best friends I've ever had."

He shrugged. "But where teaching is concerned--"

"--you're a close second," Sakura said firmly. "Very close. In fact, Kakashi, I'd--"

"SAKURA-SAMA!" Kakashi turned, seeing the gum-smacking nurse from earlier run towards Sakura hurriedly. "Oh, Sakura-sama," she panted, leaning over to catch her breath. "Some ANBU just got back from a mission, and they... they're..."

"Spit it out, woman," Sakura said firmly. "What?"

"Th-they're pretty badly maimed," the woman said, raising up slowly. "There's a total of... four, I think. Fifth floor. One of that floor's medic-nins are requesting you immediately."

"Report back to your post," Sakura said, turning to leave. "I want every other available medic nin up there with me, pronto!"

"Yes, ma'am!" The woman saluted smartly, turning quickly on her heel and jogging back to her desk.

Kakashi watched it all from the sidelines. He was amazed by the transformation Sakura went through when presented with the burden of authority--eyes fiercly snapping, back straight, a brisk, no-nonsense voice. She was so different from the little girl he had met so many years ago.

"I'm sorry, Kakashi," she said tartly. "I have to go... but don't beat yourself up about that, alright?" She walked quickly away, barking orders at two nurses who scrambled past her.

He sighed once, a low, barely audible sound. Here he was, Hatake Kakashi--the famous copy-nin--feeling low and pretty sorry for himself after hearing two scathing reports from former students.

He didn't know what he had done to make karma such a bitch, but it had obviously been freakin' terrible.

"He's... he's through these doors, in the garden."

"Thank you, you lovely girl." Gai patted her swiftly on the head. "Your cousin will surely thank you, too, because everyone just knows how much he idolizes me... although he'll never come out and say it, the silly goose!"

Hinata merely blushed and turned, stumbling away. She knew better... in fact, Neji had told her just last week that if Gai ever came to the Hyuuga family gates asking to see him, he was absolutely not to be let in.

But I... I couldn't refuse Gai-sensei, she thought worriedly. He's so much older, and wiser, and... but Neji-nii-san will surely be angry with me when he finds out... I ought to go hide somewhere, I really should...

Gai watched her, chuckling slightly. "She's just not used to be around such a dynamic person, that's all," he said to himself, smoothing down his hair.

He reached forward and slid open the elaborate screen doors, a warm gust of air blowing right by his face. "Ah," he said to himself, smiling widely. "There's nothing better than a nice spring day... looks like Neji's enjoying it, too."

Neji was seated beside a small pond, his eyes closed and a serene look pasted on his face.

"NEJI!" Gai yelled, bounding forward with his arms extended. "How about a hug for your old sensei, huh?"

Neji cracked open one eye, serene expression quickly fading. "Not on your life," he muttered under his breath.

"You're cheerier than usual today," Gai said brightly, dropping down to sit beside him. "I suppose it's the lovely weather Konoha has been blessed with lately! It's no wonder I drop by and see you sitting outside in it!"

"I was meditating," Neji said darkly, scooting inconspicuously away from Gai. "Uncle and I had just finished our sparring today, and I--"

"So you were training too, eh? Lee was doing the same!" Gai held up a hand. "Give your old sensei a high-five, Neji!"

"...No. Why are you here, Gai? My time to sit here idly and chit-chat is extremely limited today."

"No high-five, hm? You're beginning to act more and more like Kakashi these days... I wonder why." Gai's eyes narrowed. "The old fool must be trying to sabotage me... starting with my students!"

"Ridiculous," Neji said, standing. "Now, if you don't mind, I'd prefer you go ahead and state your business. I have an extremely important meeting to go to this afternoon, and I--"

"Of course, of course, I nearly forgot! Little Neji, all grown up... I remember when you were just a little thing," Gai said, wiping the corners of his eyes. "And now, here you are... one of the most highly-demanded jounins of our village!"

Neji sniffed in disgust. "Stop crying, Gai. It's very..."

"Crying is a manly thing to do," Gai said defensively. "You should never be afraid to show your true feelings, Neji."

"Of course. Now, Gai, if you don't mind--"

"I know, the business." Gai sniffed once more, then straightened his face. "My old nemesis, Hatake Kakashi, has just challenged me to another... challenge."

"How shocking," Neji said flatly.

"Now, in this challenge, we were to see who our former students' favorite teacher is... and so I, knowing how much you all love me, agreed to it."

Gai straigtened, smiling his infamous smile. "Now, Neji, I want you to be completely honest... you don't need to say me, even though I was a pretty good teacher. But anyways, Neji... are you ready?" Gai struck his good-guy pose. "Who is your--"

"Uncle."

"Wh...what?" Gai's smile deflated a bit, his stance dropping. "But..."

"He taught me everything I know," Neji said. "I learned the secret techniques of the Hyuuga clan, even though I wasn't worthy, and he has given me everything I could possibly need to succeed in life."

"But... what about me?" Gai's shoulder's drooped a little bit more. "I... I helped you with the basics..."

"When I was assigned to your team," Neji snapped, "I knew the basics."

"And so I... I mean nothing?"

Neji thought for a bit. "You were always there for me, although I never really needed you... and you did teach me a thing or two..."

"So am I number one?" Gai asked hopefully.

"No," Neji said firmly. "You could never beat out Uncle."

"But... but..."

"I must leave," Neji said. "I will see you tomorrow, Gai. One of the maids will show you the way out."

He regally walked away, leaving his former teacher standing in the middle of the garden.

"But," Gai blubbered, lower lip trembling, "I thought the teacher-student connection we had was special!"

"Why hello, Kakashi-san! What a pleasure to see you!"

Kakashi stood uneasily, looking down at the boy bowing so low his nose was practically scraping the ground. "You know, Sai," he said, scratching his head, "I don't think you have to be so formal whenever you greet someone you already know... I mean, I appreciate it and all, but I'm not that important."

"Oh." Sai straightened. "The book I was just reading said that whenever you greeted someone, you should be as polite and as welcoming as possible."

"Yeah, well, there's a difference between being gracious and being... whatever you'd call that just now."

Sai blinked. "Really?"

Kakashi felt bad for the kid, he really did.

"Yep," Kakashi said warily. "Look, I just want to get this over with as quickly and as painlessly as possible, so... who's your favorite teacher?"

Sai blinked again. "Excuse me?"

"Your favorite teacher. You know, the guy--or girl--that was always there for you, that taught you stuff, that supported you? That person."

"But... why do you ask? I thought asking personal questions were rude."

"It's not really a personal question... I mean, it is, but it's not like... look, just answer it."

"But why did you ask?"

Kakashi felt like banging his head against the wall. "Because Gai challenged me that he was the better teacher, and so now I have to go around asking my students if I'm their favorite."

"Oh..."

"Yeah. Will you answer my question?"

"I... I think I can." Sai's eyes narrowed in thought. He's not really my favorite teacher--I mean, he's not really my teacher at all--but etiquette suggests that I tell him what he wants to hear. He obviously wants to win the bet with Gai, whcih means he wants me to say that he's my favorite teacher, so I suppose I will--

"Um, Sai? I don't want to be rude or anything, but it wasn't that hard of a question."

"My apologies for taking so long." Sai bowed again.

"It's okay, really, just... answer my question. I mean, I already know what the answer is going to be, so--"

"You're my favorite teacher."

"What?"

Sai smiled up at Kakashi. Freaky little kid, Kakashi thought, wincing inwardly. His smile is so... expressionless. "You're my favorite teacher, Kakashi-... sensei."

"But I've not taught you anything."

"You just taught me not to be so formal whenever I greet someone."

"That's not really something I taught. It was just a... a free life lesson."

"Well, I learned something from it. Therefore, it had to have been taught."

"Kid, I... I've not supported you in anything."

"I've been on missions with you before. You've supported me then."

"You're missing the point here, Sai. I just asked you that question as a technicality, not because I--"

"It's okay, Kakashi-sensei," Sai said, still smiling his expressionless smile. "Good luck with your bet."

He bowed extremely low once more--He kid obviously didn't learn a thing, Kaksahi thought--and trotted away, leaving the befuddled copy nin behind in his wake.

"I don't understand what the hell just happened," Kakashi muttered to himself, jamming his hands in his pockets, "but it looks like there's one other 'student' I'll have to acknowledge now."

And one more person to get a birthday gift for.

...Damn it all.

In all his life, Gai could not remember feeling so worthless and depressed.

He had always prided himself on being a wonderful, amzaing teacher, the type of man that was always there when they needed him, the type who always had the right thing to say and the right advice to give.

And besides that, he had been so cool. He was sure no other students in the entire Hidden Leaf Village had as cool a teacher as what his students had.

"I mean, I'm the sexy green beast of Konoha," he sobbed, dramatically throwing his head down upon the table. "What more could a child ask for in a teacher?"

The bartender rolled her eyes. "You poor lil' thing."

"Kind woman," Gai sputtered, raising his head from his arms, "do you think I really am that bad of a teacher?"

Noting his swollen, red-rimmed eyes, his snotty nose, and his rumpled hair, the bartender winced. "Like you said, honey, you're the sexy green beast. What more could they ask for?"

"I... I have no..."

"You need a glass of sake," the woman said, ducking under the counter. "And I ain't talking about no pansy shot glass, either... you look like you want to go all the way."

She popped up again, holding a giant galss in one hand and a container of sake in the others. "I usually save this for extreme emergencies, but..." She gave him one more look over. "This probably qualifies as one."

Gai buried his head into his arms and began to sob again. The bartender gently sat the glass down beside his head and backed away.

"Hey," a new voice said tiredly. "I'll have what he's having."

"Ka-Kakashi?" Gai jumped up, furiously wiping the tears from his eyes. "My eternal rival! How was the competition for you, eh? For me, it was... it was..."

"Awful," Kakashi said flatly, dropping into the empty seat beside his nemesis. "Out of three kids, only one said I was their favorite."

"Ah-hah!" Gai leapt off his barstool. "Looks like I win yet again, Kakashi! Tenten and Lee noth said I was their favorite!"

"Great for you," Kakashi said, nodding thankfully to the bartender as she set down his huge galss of sake. "Looks like you're not a complete failure."

"I'm not!"

Kakashi rolled his visible eye. Gai was just as slow as always.

"So Neji said you weren't his favorite, huh?"

"Yes," Gai said, his voice losing some if its youthful exuberance. "I always thought he and I had a wonderful connection... not as great as Lee and I, of course, because he and I are like soul mates--"

Kakashi, who had been contendly sipping his drink through his mask, coughed suddenly.

"--but Neji and I still always seemed close."

"That just goes to show," Kakashi said, still coughing slightly, "that our opinion isn't worth a damn."

"I suppose," Gai said sadly, picking up his glass. "You know, Kakashi, this victory... it holds no joy for me tonight."

"I'm sure, Gai." Kakashi looked over, noting the defeated look on his face. "Look... let's just forget about this competition, okay? We'll just both get really drunk tonight, stagger home, and forget any of this ever happened. We'll go back to being tied, exactly as we were before, and--"

"Oh-ho! You sabotager!" Gai suddenly regained his lost energy, jumping up for the umpteenth time that night. "I see where you wanted this to go! You wanted me to agree, forget this ever happened, so you could go around saying we were still tied instead of admiting defeat to me! Ah-ha!" Gai struck a pose, grinning. "You can't get anything by me, Kakashi!"

"Nope," Kakashi said, voice drenched in fake sadness. "I never can seem to win against you."

Gai basked in his glory for a second longer, basking in the glow of the dim lights, and then dropped back down in his chair. "I won't forget this epic win," he said. "But let's still get drunk. I need to... to numb the pain."

"Of course," Kakashi said, raising his glass in the air. "Here's to us, Gai. Us teachers of the year."

"Hear, hear," he said weakly, clanking his glass against his arch-rival's.

They sat in silence for a while, each thinking their own separate thoughts.

"Hey, Kakashi," Gai said suddenly.

"What?"

"I bet I can down my glass of sake faster than you can."

Beneath the mask, Kakashi grinned fondly. "Let's go."

A/N: Good God... it's been, like, over half a YEAR since I last wrote anything. How lazy can you GET?

After many emails I read after finally getting my email to work again, telling me how much they missed me and asking WHY I hadn't been updating, I decided to revamp this lil' thing that had been sitting around my desktop for... forever. It's not the greatest thing in the world, but I thought it was kinda cute. I mean, I've always loved the whole Kakashi-Gai friendship thing. It's adorable!

Review, please! I always appreciate some good criticism! And, since this is un-beta-ed, please tell me if you spot any mistakes.

(And on another note... SCHOOL'S OUT! YESH!!)